When You Feel Like You've Failed

A tender meditation for the moments when something hasn't worked out and the inner voice turns harsh. You're guided to notice that voice, ask whether you'd speak to a friend the same way, and offer yourself a little more of the care you'd give someone else. Good for anyone being hard on themselves after a setback.

Transcript

Welcome to this meditation. Which is a practice for when you feel like you've failed. So, I'd like you to welcome yourself to this space. Settle into your body. Let your eyes close. And if you want. As you're letting your shoulders relax. As you're letting your jaw soften. You could pay attention to your hands. Maybe put them on your heart. Or hold one hand in the other. Offering yourself some comfort. And take a few slow breaths. Without needing them to be perfect. Gently bring to mind something that's left you feeling like you failed. And you don't need to relive every detail. But just let that feeling be present. Let it rise up so you can look at it. And notice where it sits in your body. If it's a heaviness. Or a tightness. Or a feeling of shrinking away from something. Whatever's there. Just let it be there without pushing it away. Just notice with compassion. How your body is responding to this feeling. And ask yourself. Would I speak to a friend? Or treat a friend the way I'm speaking to myself now. And if the answer is no, That's okay. It simply tells you. Something useful. That the voice in your head has been harsher than it needs to be. And if it tells you yes, That's okay too. If you're feeling that honesty. About where something went wrong. That's okay. We can be honest with ourselves without. Judging or hurting ourselves. It's okay to acknowledge some where where. You feel like you could have done things differently or better. Without it turning into you. Painful self-criticism. So if you want you can imagine or you can physically Put your hand over the part of you that feels this the most. Maybe your chest. Or your tummy. Wherever that feeling lives. You could wrap your arms around yourself. Rub your upper arms. Put a hand on your face. Anything that's comforting and warm. Anything that reminds you that, In the midst of everything, You can still be your own best friend. Failure is not a proof of your worth. It's proof that you tried something that mattered enough to risk. If your failure feels like an act that you did or words that you spoke. That's okay. This is not a grand failure. It could just be a mistake. If you're able to. Offer yourself. Something closer to what you would offer someone you love. And it could be as simple as. . . This is hard. But you're still worthy of care. That wasn't the best. But I still love you. You don't have to believe it all the way yet. But let the words be there. And if you can open yourself up to forgiving yourself. That's wonderful, And if you can't. . . Open up to the facts and the knowledge and the belief that the universe still loves you. Just as you are. Most failure is a societal pressure. It's not a problem of existence. So take a slow breath in. And let it out longer than it came in. And when you're ready, Bring your attention back to the space you're in. Back to your room. Open your eyes. And carry whatever gentleness you can find. And be kind to yourself. Thank you so much for sharing your space with me today. Have a wonderful day.