Hello my beautiful soul.
Welcome to my meditation.
My name is Anumiha Obarker and today we're going to sit with the grief of losing a far baby.
Take a gentle breath in through your nose and exhale slowly through the mouth.
Again,
Inhale softness and exhale any need to be strong right now.
Allow your body to settle.
Let the weight of the day fall away.
There is nothing you need to fix,
Change or rush through in this moment.
Just let your body,
Your mind and your heart ground.
Bring your awareness to where your body is supported.
The floor beneath you,
The chair,
The bed,
The mat or the pillow,
Whatever is it that you're sitting on is equivalent to the earth holding you.
Silently say to yourself,
In this moment I am safe to feel.
Safe to feel whatever is it that comes my way.
And remember my love,
Grief does not need to be pushed away here.
Love does not need to be contained.
Now gently bring your beloved pet into your awareness.
There is no right way to do this.
You may see their eyes,
You may feel their presence,
You may simply feel a heaviness or a quiet ache.
Let whatever arises,
Arise.
Notice what the loss feels like in your body.
Is it tightness in the chest?
Does it feel like a hollow space?
A warmth mixed with pain?
What is it that it feels like?
Name it in your head.
Awareness is powerful.
Now place one hand over your heart and if it feels right to you,
The other hand over your belly and breathe in deep into that space.
Whisper to yourself,
This hurts because I loved deeply.
And let that be enough.
You do not need to bypass this pain.
You do not need to be grateful or find meaning in it yet.
Just stay with your pain.
Imagine the breath that you're taking in,
Creating a gentle container around the grief.
Not trapping it but holding it with all the kindness and compassion you can accustom.
If tears come,
Let them.
If numbness comes,
Let that come too.
We're not running away from anything that you wish to feel.
There's no timeline here.
With each breath,
Remind yourself,
I am allowed to miss you.
I am allowed to ache.
My love for you has no end.
Not even death can take the love that I have for you so deeply go away.
Now gently shift your awareness to your heart space.
Imagine your heart as a soft,
Warm light.
It does not demand anything.
It does not cling.
It's just simply existing.
From this light heart space,
Imagine a thread of light extending outwards.
That thread is not grasping for anything.
It is not searching for anything.
It is just reaching with love.
At the end of that thread,
Sense your pet meeting you there.
Experience their essence that you have known as long as they were in your life.
Remind yourself to think of their essence.
Their essence filled with love and companionship.
Not what you experienced towards the end,
Which could have been pain or struggle or aging.
Feel the familiarity of the love that you had for each other.
The time that you spent with one another.
The way they knew you.
The way love moved effortlessly between you.
Let yourself feel that connection,
Heart to heart.
You might sense warmth,
Peace,
A subtle joy,
Or deep tenderness.
Or you might sense nothing at all.
Trust whatever your experience is.
Silently say or simply feel,
We are still connected.
Love will always tie our souls together.
If there are things you wish you had said,
Things you wish you had done differently,
Offer them now.
And imagine your far baby receiving every word and every action without judgment,
Without misunderstanding.
And receiving it only and only with love.
Now visualize them offering you something in return.
It could be forgiveness,
Perhaps gratitude or reassurance.
Whatever is it that comes to you naturally,
Allow it to come.
Let that exchange of energy complete itself gently.
Now allow the image to soften.
The connection does not break here.
It simply rests in existence.
Bring your awareness back to your breath.
Slow,
Steady,
Kind.
Notice your body again.
Notice the ground beneath you,
The quiet around you.
Feel the calm that can coexist with grief.
Not instead of it,
But alongside of it.
Silently say,
I carry you in my heart and I carry myself forward with care,
With love and all of your memories.
Take one final breath in.
Hold and release it slowly.
When you're ready,
Gently open your eyes.
Move slowly.
Be tender with yourself.
Grief is love learning a new shape and you are not alone in it.
And remember to be kind to yourself,
My love.
Sending so much love and healing your way.
Namaste.
