So let yourself arrive into a comfortable position.
If you're seated aim to be upright but at the same time relaxed.
Let your hands rest easily.
Let your shoulders soften.
Let your belly soften.
Close your eyes or softly lower your gaze and bring a feeling of relaxation to your face and head.
Feel the support beneath you,
The chair,
The floor,
The ground and feel yourself being held by this support.
Take a few natural breaths.
There's no need to change your breath.
Just notice it coming and going.
If sounds arise let them be part of the meditation.
Just noises arising and passing.
You don't need to try to identify them.
They're just waves of sound coming and going.
Let your body settle into being here right now.
Today we're going to explore equanimity in relation to other people.
Equanimity is the balance that allows us to care deeply without needing to control,
To fix or to manage how things turn out.
This is not indifference.
This is not turning away.
It is the capacity to hold care and acceptance together.
To say inwardly I care about you and I also accept that your life is not mine to run.
In this balance the heart can stay open and the nervous system can soften.
So I invite you to bring to mind someone whose well-being you feel concerned for.
This might be someone you love deeply,
Your partner,
Your child or grandchild or another family member such as a sibling.
It could be a close friend or even someone you don't know that well such as a neighbor.
But someone whose life you sometimes have thoughts about.
Perhaps someone you find yourself wishing would do things differently.
Someone you think might suffer less or be happier if they made better choices.
Or if they would only listen to you and see things the way you see them.
There's no need to judge this.
It's very human.
Just notice who comes to your mind and then notice what happens in your body when you think of this person.
Maybe there's a feeling of warmth or perhaps there's a feeling of tension.
Maybe there is a sense of responsibility or frustration or care.
Let whatever is here be here.
Just observe your feelings with kindness.
Now gently introduce the idea you care about what happens to this person and you do not control their life.
You can offer love,
Presence,
Kindness and support and at the same time you cannot live their life for them.
You may say gently to yourself,
May I care without trying to control.
May I trust that this person has their own path.
If any resistance arises,
Guilt,
Fear,
Sadness,
Relief or uncertainty let that be part of the practice.
Equanimity is not forcing yourself to feel calm.
It is allowing what is true to be true.
May I care without trying to control.
May I trust that this person has their own path.
Rest for a few moments in the feeling of caring and letting go.
Now allow your awareness to include people you encounter in everyday life.
People you on the streets,
See in shops,
See on walks,
People in queues at the supermarket,
In the table next to you at the cafe or restaurant.
People you do not know and may never know but people that you see.
Notice how easily the mind can judge,
React or tighten around others.
Now gently bring to mind each of these people is living a life shaped by many conditions.
They have their own histories,
Their own pressures,
Hopes and losses that you cannot see just as you do.
You might gently say inwards,
May I meet others without needing them to be different.
May I allow people to be as they are.
May I move through the world with ease and kindness.
Notice how equanimity here is not personal.
It is a way of being with the shared human world.
May I meet others without needing them to be different.
May I allow people to be as they are.
May I move through the world with ease and kindness.
Now let go of the images of others and return to your own heart,
To your breath,
To the simple feeling of being here.
Notice what it feels like to care and to let go.
Notice the softness,
The space,
The quiet strength of that.
This is equanimity.
Know that you can carry this gentle balance into your next interactions,
The capacity to care and the freedom to let go.
Now begin to feel your body again,
Your hands,
Your feet,
Your posture.
Notice the quality of your heart and nervous system now.
Take a slow breath in and a long breath out.
When you're ready you can begin to move your body,
Making small movements,
Whatever feels comfortable to you and when you're ready you may open your eyes.
Thank you for your practice.
