Let Things Be Uncomfortable

Our culture creates the impression we can’t handle emotional difficulties and we tend to ignore them and distract ourselves with the millions of diversions out there. When we start to allow our attention to be with a difficulty with an attitude of kindness and curiosity, we find this takes some of the energy away from the maelstrom, and if we can recognise the negative thoughts are part of ourselves and be ok with that, we can diffuse it still further.

Transcript

And we'll become comfortable in our chair and take a few breaths as we settle down. To start with we'll take our attention to our body and consciously relax the body. So placing it somewhere comfortable, Allowing our limbs to be in a neutral position and resting. Our spine a little bit straight, A little bit relaxed. Our neck neutral. We can leave our body somewhere comfortable for a little while, Where it won't need to move about too much. Taking a few deeper breaths. Having our attention on the breath as it moves. And noticing how it feels to become quiet, To become centered. Just for this moment there's nothing else to do. If your mind wanders, We know it does that and it's okay. And we return to the focus which at the moment is the breath. No fuss, No judgment. So for our practice today where we aim to spend some time with a difficulty, To explore a difficulty, Let's decide, Choose a difficulty in our life. So often the one that pops up first is the one that would like some attention, But I'll give you a few moments to decide on one. Perhaps not the biggest thing in your life, But something that you have a little bit of a reaction to. And that depends on how stable you're feeling right now, How strong you're feeling right now, Or if you're tired it might be something smaller. If you're in the middle of a difficulty then that's the one for you. A few more moments. Okay. So having been in our head, Looking through our memory files, Let's return to our body. And we can use the body throughout the practice as an anchor. So if our mind should wander or if actually we do get a strong emotional response, Then we can put the difficulty down, Return to our breath and our body. So let's imagine we're going to take the difficulty out of the memory bank, The file in our mind, And put it on the workbench in front of us. We're going to turn it over. Imagine holding it in our hands, We're going to look at it from a couple of different angles. So noticing how it feels when we do that. Noticing our response, Mental, Emotional, Physical. And as we consider this difficulty we will continually check in with our response. Observing it as best we can with kindness and curiosity as best we can. Can we take this problem and turn it upside down? Look at the underneath bit, The inside bit. Is there something in the middle of it we haven't yet discovered? And what reaction do we get as we do this? And our reaction really is the key bit. It's that that we want to hold with love, With acceptance. Our reaction can't be wrong because we're having it, It's ours. Even if it's something we don't like and would rather not have, Are we able to hold it as if in our arms, Allowing space for that reaction to be? And if we can't, Can we allow space for that reaction to be? Turning our focus back to our problem. How would it be if it were our best friend's problem? Does that give us different perspective on it? Again becoming the observer of our reactions. Bringing our attention to the problem, Turning it over, Turning it round as if on the workbench. Are we able to acknowledge that this issue for us has allowed us to grow or maybe is challenging us to change and grow? And noticing how that feels physically, Emotionally and mentally. And now we may feel we've had a good exploration of this problem. Find some different perspective from which to view the problem and been the keen observer of our reaction to all those viewpoints. If we were to put down the problem, Let's put it back in its box, In its folder, Can we spend a moment with our body, With our mind and our emotions, And congratulate ourselves for taking the time, Making the space and the effort to do this. Knowing it takes courage to challenge your own viewpoints. Knowing it takes courage to look at a difficulty in the moment because this is practice for a real world difficulty coming along and feeling it and feeling our reaction to it as best we can. And it does take courage but knowing that our light of our awareness is very powerful, More powerful than we realise. And when we shine that light of our awareness where there was before darkness and lack of awareness, Much of the mystery and lack of control will dissipate straight away because we dare to look and address it. Hopefully bring it into our conscious awareness, Allow it and allow it to leave. This is how we process difficulties, Difficult emotions. Allow them to be, Bringing them into the fold as it were. Integrate that part of us that were before we were afraid to look at. So giving ourselves a big pat on the back, Big hug if that feels appropriate. Taking a few more breaths with the body, Softening the body once more, Softening the shoulders the muscles of the face and taking a few restful breaths. And then having done some good work, Some courageous work to take a step forward with our growth we can slowly reanimate our body, Moving our arms and legs, Our wrists and ankles and having a little stretch if that's for us. And easing ourselves back into wakeful consciousness. Thank you for practicing with me.

Reviews

Great practice, thank you. Not easy to face difficulty instead of trying to run away but you really smoothed the way and eased me into this with your calming voice and manner 🙏🏻

Thank you 🙏

That was really helpful, thank you!