A Gentle Relationship With Fear

This is a guided meditation with a gentle approach toward the parts of ourselves that hold fear. The track contains an Internal Family Systems Therapy that focuses on utilizing a compassionate view toward all parts of the internal world.

Produced by PJ Hedman

Transcript

And today,

As we get started,

We're going to look at the parts of us that feel fear and offer them some compassion.

And so whether you're sitting or lying down,

Give yourself permission to release your muscles and joints right into the chair or the floor.

Allowing your body to be held in that pool of gravity,

Releasing the big muscles in your thighs,

All the muscles in your neck,

Shoulders,

And back.

Noticing your breath in and out through your nose.

Big,

Deep,

Long,

Gentle breath.

Really allowing that breath to deepen.

And if there's any other space in your body that needs to move or adjust,

Give it permission to do that.

This time is just for you.

Now starting a body scan,

Very gently,

From the top of your head to your toes,

Like an energetic MRI.

Slowly,

Slowly,

Looking at every cross section of your body.

Realizing tension,

Sensation.

As you do that gentle body scan,

Reminding your body and your system that you can't do this wrong.

This is just about getting curious and noticing and taking a few moments in your day for yourself.

As you scan your body,

Perhaps you notice tension in a large area,

Or perhaps you notice a twinge in the smallest pinprick of an area.

Let's just notice it.

We're not going to change anything.

We're just going to pay attention.

If there was one particular area that seemed loudest,

Biggest,

Most noticeable,

Go back to that area of your body.

Perhaps that's your chest,

Your abdomen,

Your hip.

Just let yourself really focus on that space and offer that space some compassion.

Realizing that space in your body,

A sense of openness and breath.

Breathing into or around that space.

It may or may not be interested in receiving your breath,

And that's okay.

We'll just notice.

And as you breathe into that space,

I want you to think now about a time in the last month where you felt fear,

Certain experience,

A certain memory,

A certain interaction.

And if you can,

Set yourself back in that space in your mind's eye,

Reminding your body and your system that you're safe today.

Just in your mind's eye,

Allowing yourself to be back in the experience of where you felt fear.

And for today,

We're not going to lift that hundred pound weight.

We're not going to find a space where you felt terror,

But just a bit of fear,

A bit of concern.

Perhaps it was as mild as simple confusion for a moment.

And as you're back in that space,

I want you to take in the scene.

If that is inside or outside,

It's warm or chilly.

Notice what you're wearing in that scene.

Is it bright or shadowy?

Are you alone?

Were there others with you?

Notice the sensations in your body as you allow yourself in your mind's eye to be back in that scene.

And now I want you to do another body scan,

Allowing yourself to notice in that scene where you're in or around your body,

It held fear or a sense of lack of safety.

Perhaps that's your belly,

Your arms,

Your feet.

And invite your body to share with you where it held that sensation or emotion of fear or confusion.

And as you notice that space in your body,

Perhaps it's a large area or a very tiny area.

Let's notice it.

Seeing if you can find the edges of that fear or confusion.

Where in or around your body does it start or stop?

Just see if you can breathe into or around it with your own breath,

With just incredible gentleness and a sense of loving kindness towards that part of you.

The part of you that holds fear from this particular experience.

And let's notice that space as a part of you in the same way that your ear is a part of you or your ribs are a part of you,

But they are not the whole of you and they are not the core self of you,

But they're important parts of you.

So is this fear part.

And if it's possible and feels comfortable,

Laying your hand on that part of your body that holds fear,

Letting it warm the space that holds that fear.

And now I'm wondering if you could ask that part of you,

If it knows that you're here,

Does that part of you that holds fear,

Does it know that you are here?

The brilliant,

Warm,

Courageous,

Calm center of you that holds the essence of your self.

Does that fear part know you're here?

If not,

Perhaps introduce yourself,

Letting it know that you are the beautiful core self and you're here to help.

And that part may or may not believe you and that's okay.

That part may have been holding fear for a long,

Long time.

And we're going to have a lot of space for that part that has had such a big job.

And so you might even let the part know how old you are.

It may or may not already know this,

But maybe let it know your actual age.

And as you do that,

Notice how it feels about this information.

How does this part that holds fear feel about the fact that adult you is here now to help?

And however it feels is just fine.

Perhaps it's more scared of being seen,

Perhaps it's feeling comforted.

Whatever this part feels is perfectly fine and invited.

And so now with this fear part,

You could ask it a question.

And if not,

That's okay too.

If you could ask it,

If this part that holds that fear could tell you anything at all about itself,

What would it want you to know?

If it could share something with you about the fear that it holds without being shamed or dismissed or bullied in return,

What would it want you to know?

And if it's able to respond,

And if that feels like too much,

You can ask the fear part to dial back just a stitch to give you a moment to breathe.

Perhaps you were really able to hear that and letting that fear part know that you really get what it's sharing right now.

And again,

If it feels appropriate,

Asking this part,

If there's anything else that wants you to know,

And inviting that information and being aware if it feels like too much,

You can ask that fear part to dial back,

Not because it's in trouble or it did anything wrong,

But we've leave space for self to breathe too.

And now inviting that part to come closer to self,

To come closer to this beautiful,

Strong,

Connected space of self for this fear part to know that it has adult you here with it.

And just breathing again into this part,

Letting it know that it is not alone.

Letting it know that it's likely that there are other memories and other instances that it would like you to know about.

And we can save that for another time because we want to do things in an order that allow the whole system to be calm and clear as we comfort these parts of us that feel fear.

And now asking the same fear part,

Holds some of that fear or confusion,

Asking it,

If there's something you could give it right now to help it feel just a small bit more comfort,

What would that be?

Just listening for an answer.

Maybe it's a blanket,

A nap,

A glass of water,

A hug.

Maybe it needs to know that self is connected to others in the world of safety,

Letting it know that you're still here with it.

So breathing again into or around the space of fear and noticing if it looks or feels any different than when you first went into that scene and thanking it for being willing to be known today,

For being willing to be seen and vulnerable in its fear or confusion.

Coming back,

Noticing that beautiful self energy of light,

Courage,

Strength,

And love.

And sometimes that self energy feels bigger than others and that's okay.

It's very natural.

But letting that fear part know that you'll come back to it.

That part that feels confusion that you'll come back and visit again.

And for now,

Taking in again,

A long deep breath in and out through your nose,

Letting your body expand and contract with the breath.

Move your fingers,

Be squeezing a fist and releasing and a stretch with one arm and then the other.

Beginning to come back to the room.

And when you're ready and no sooner,

Beginning to open your eyes just enough to look through your eyelashes.

Breathing your eyes open.

May you have a blessed day.

And may you be gentle,

Gentle,

Gentle.

May you have a blessed day.

Reviews

Thank you 🙏 this meditation is a very useful tool to support myself

That was brilliant. The introduction and to identify who you are to the fear and your age. I’m struggling with fear as a parent to adult children with substance issues. Somehow after I introduced myself, I had a deep sense of peace and a strong sense that I wasn’t alone. That I am strong enough to help that fear go through this. Thank you. 🙏

It was very hard for me. I can't find the courageous, shiny self you mention, so I don"t know where to refuge... but I'm glad I dared be here for a few minutes, it made me happy to see I could postpone a pill and be in that space for a little bit.