Muditā (Empathetic Joy) With Wave Meditation

A short introduction to the Brahmavihāra, or Divine Abode, of Muditā (empathetic joy), followed by a guided wave meditation. Exploring the interdependence and interconnectedness of all beings and the common resistances to the practice of muditā: experiencing joy for the happiness of others.

Transcript

Mudita,

Which is empathetic joy,

Is probably one of the most,

I think it's of the Brahma Viharas,

It's probably the most under-practiced of the Brahma Viharas.

And I think it's really a critical one.

It really makes a difference in our practice.

And what I like about doing,

As we've been practicing,

Is the equanimity,

I feel,

Leaves a kind of foundation for connection and acceptance for whatever's arising in our perception or experience without preference.

So that's an important skill set to be developing of acceptance.

And we learn to be with the truth of whatever is folding right now.

Well,

With mudita,

Which I like the translation of empathetic joy,

And that really helps us to more fully develop the ability to be present with another's happiness or good fortune,

While feeling an unrestricted,

Open-hearted joy.

So rather than getting triggered,

And if we do get triggered in mudita,

This is useful too,

And we can get triggered because it can kick up all the issues we've had in our life around envy and jealousy,

In particular,

And our relationship.

And I think what's great about mudita is it really does a great job helping us see and highlight our relationship to scarcity and abundance.

And it's an issue that everybody has,

So it's a great one to look at and see the patterning for that.

That's one of the great benefits.

In mudita,

Part of the function of mudita is it connects us more with the undivided wholeness,

That's the reality of the universe and all of life.

We have a sense that we're all these siloed individuals with all these differences,

We're not connected,

A lot of the time this is how we feel,

And yet that's actually not true.

We're actually interdependent.

I like the example of here in the States,

They have these trees they call aspen trees in one part of the country,

And for years the aspen trees,

They grow in great thickets and they have yellow leaves in the fall,

They're just gorgeous trees.

And they found out at one point that they share a common root system.

So all these individual trees with very unique features all have the same source.

And I think of us as being the same way,

That we're all connected in a way that we appear to be individuals,

But yet we in truth are not.

We're in truth,

We're really a part of this whole in a separate expression of that.

So with mudita we're able to get more in touch with a true happiness and a joyfulness about another's happiness or success.

And as I mentioned,

It also does highlight whatever tension we have,

And by tension I mean that balancing between scarcity and abundance.

And virtually everybody has this,

Every family had their own issues around it,

So it's just a very common issue to work with.

The resistances to mudita,

Envy.

Envy is really that strong urge to get what another has or want what another has.

So someone has some good experience,

We want their experience.

That's envy.

And if you grew up in a family with siblings,

This is such a common phenomenon among siblings of who's getting the attention and the love and the various presence and things.

It triggers a lot.

Also jealousy and other resistance.

And jealousy to me really has more of a quality of an anger.

There's more anger that someone else got something that I should have gotten.

And also jealousy seems to also kick up any sense of lack of value.

So on some sense in jealousy,

There's an anger but also a kind of feeling of helplessness that I really am not worth getting this.

So it really stirs the pot on any issues we have on lack of value in our lives.

And then finally resistance of greed,

Wanting more of the good stuff,

The things we want.

And implicit in that is that there isn't enough.

There's a small supply of the good stuff,

And we really need to make sure we get it and we perhaps hoard it or we secret it away so that we make sure we have enough.

And working with mudita really lets us highlight the resistances and work with them in a way that we start making contact with the wholeness,

With the fact there is enough.

And when someone else gets something good,

All of us are benefited.

I find this,

As I said,

A particularly good practice.

For me in my personal life,

This was part of my story in that I was from a family where I was one of these kids that my mother actually didn't want and was very clear about it when I was born.

And the great news for me was that when I was one,

She hired someone to raise me.

So there was a woman that came in and for the first seven years of my life,

She raised me Monday through Friday,

And then my mother did on the weekends.

And I'm very different from my siblings as a consequence.

I had somebody who was a young woman who had a lot of great love to give,

And so I had a good relationship.

But I really know the issues around jealousy and envy and all these things.

These are issues I've had to work with throughout my practice life.

To understand mudita,

We need to really start with unity,

With the connectedness that is the truth of reality of who we all are and how we're interconnected.

The unity aspect is a quality of our deeper nature.

It's also a quality of transcendent experience.

People that have experiences around jhana relating to rigpa,

Various other things,

Awakening experiences,

All these have a commonality of unity.

And that's just a part,

The non-dual,

Meaning that there's not a separation between me and what's being observed or experienced.

There's a unified experience where the me part of it is out of the equation.

There's just experience.

And so mudita allows us to get in contact or invites us to get in contact with that,

What I call the undivided oneness or undivided wholeness.

And I really like the Zen masters used to talk about this.

They would say to a student that something was not two,

Implying non-duality.

And so of course our minds immediately leap to,

Okay,

Well it's not two,

It must be one.

And so we're expressing it's not two and not one.

So they want to take away the concept of oneness also in that,

Which puts us right into the felt sense or can put us right into the felt sense of the undivided nature of true nature.

It's the undivided quality of universal love.

And it's the undivided quality both in the absolute realm and experience obsessively.

I'm going to do a little visualization meditation with you now.

So go ahead and settle yourself into your meditation space and posture.

So start with some deep belly breaths.

Really expand your belly as fully as you can.

And then we're going to do a little meditation meditation.

So let's really expand your belly as fully as you can.

And expel as much air as is possible.

Feel your feet on the ground.

And deep support that building you're in has for you right now.

So picture a vast ocean.

We're arriving here at sunset where the beautiful sky is painted.

Pinks and orange,

Reds,

Purple,

Even a little black here and there.

Just a spectacular sky.

We see the waves rolling in a kind of unison in the direction of shore.

But if we look in each direction,

We can't see any land.

All we see is ocean in every direction.

Now imagine that you are one of these waves slowly rolling many miles towards the shoreline.

And many miles towards the shoreline.

Each wave is unique,

Completely unique,

And perfect exactly as it is.

Nothing needs to be changed.

Nothing needs to be added.

And each wave is so individual and unique that there'll never be another wave exactly like your wave.

Notice how your wave can be aware of itself.

Its dimensions,

Its fullness.

Its fullness.

Its contact with the water and air.

Let your awareness drift to the base of you as a wave where the wave and the ocean meet.

Are you able to sense or feel the ocean beneath the wave?

Is the water of the wave and the water of the ocean the same?

You can stay with the wave if that's your preference.

Or you can let your sense of awareness,

Your sense of perception move from the water of wave into the water as ocean.

See if you notice the perception,

The awareness of the vastness of the ocean.

See if you can feel that expansion in your heart,

Opening in every direction without limit.

Can you sense the connection of your wave,

All the other waves in the ocean,

All of them in water,

The same water?

As you feel into the water,

Can you perceive a quality of love,

Connection,

Expanded openness,

Acceptance of everything in the ocean?

Let yourself feel that universal love,

Deep acceptance,

Welcoming,

Feel that love,

The expanse of it in every direction.

There's no end,

There's no edge,

Just the vastness of love.

Now let's listen to the sound of thehow.

.

.

Reviews

I could clearly visualize my wave form and the force and vastness of the ocean moving that form. But love? Not so much. Love as I know it is made of care and protection. Love is a human experience. Any suggestions for how I might view this differently? 🙏

A beautiful talk and meditation. Thank you!