The Space You Are

This voice-only meditation leads you deeply into your body, into the moment, and into Silence. Recorded at the 2021 Kiran Trace Retreat in Santa Cruz, CA, this meditation has a particular potency and effectiveness.

Transcript

So you're welcome to close your eyes or keep them open. We've been doing both this week. I'm going to close my eyes and we're going to start as we always do with that plain old awareness. Often in meditation or what we call spiritual practice we can think this is esoteric or hidden or something like that. It's not. It's the most obvious thing. Awareness is that which is looking out of your eyes. It's the background awareness that has been there your whole life witnessing you. Witnessing this body, Witnessing the moment. It is before the mind. It is crystal clear. As we've been doing this week we've asked everyone to check for themselves. Look. You can see. Be aware of that awareness behind it all. The non-personal awareness that's just soft and quiet in the background. And see is it crisp and clear. Is it easeful and effortless. It's just there, There's no one to conjure it or do anything with it or concentrate on it. No concentration needed, No effort needed. In fact awareness is utterly effortless. And we've been really exploring this week how awareness has a kind of preference which is to be with this one, This body in this moment. Mind would tell us different. Fear would tell us different. It would look to distraction, To a juicy thought. And as we've also talked about those thoughts, Everything, Everything, Everything is completely welcome. Awareness doesn't mind. Just like the sky doesn't mind a thunderstorm. It doesn't matter. But there is much more here than thought. You've heard all those thoughts before. So let's take that vast, Clear, Soft, Effortless awareness behind it all, Looking out of your eyes, Listening to my voice, Your truest nature. And let's really let it come home to the moment. It's an allowing. It's your birthright as Kieran would say. It's a natural process. Simple but not necessarily easy since so much of our awareness has gone to fear over the millennia, To thought. But it can be brought into the body and brought into the moment. And it's a delicious process. So just for now, Take that awareness and just listen to the body overall and find a slightly more delicious sitting position or laying position. Just indulge the body. Let the body tell you, Awareness can hear it, What it would like. A little more support on your back or under your feet. Adjusting the spine. And this is an invitation throughout the meditation. At no point do we become rigid, Do we not listen to the dynamic movements of the body. And then let's just start to feel into our tail bones. So right there, Tucked under, Right where you're sitting is your tailbone area. And just bringing awareness to feel whatever you feel there is what we'll start with. So maybe you feel warmth or the fabric. Maybe you can feel that there's a kind of fine energy there. Nothing your mind can ever find but awareness can. It's just a sensation there. What sensations can you feel in your tailbone area, In your sit bones? Sometimes we have a lot of blocks here. It can feel a bit scary, A bit something to go there. It's just the mind playing its game. It's not true. Find out for yourself. What is it to be aware of the tailbone and the vertebrae above the tailbone and the energetic stream coming through the tailbone perhaps. It's possible for that to feel delicious, To be in touch with this energetic vibrancy, This beautiful cord of energy that has you deeply rooted to the earth whether or not you're aware of it. It's just delicious to be aware of it. You don't have to be. But find out for yourself what is it to feel through that spine down through the tailbone and down down down into the earth, Down deep through the soil and the rock to take your seat here. Whether or not your thoughts say so, You belong here. You are deeply connected in your body, In the earth, In the ether with each other. There isn't anywhere you could go where you're not there's not connective fiber. We just haven't noticed. Down through the tailbone and let's just really feel into the pelvis, Feeling inside that lower back letting it soften, Really deepening that awareness to just land in the body, Land in that lower back like a comfy chair that you're just gonna take your seat in. It's such a relief to just land in the body to bring awareness to soften, Soften the bones of the pelvis, The hip joints, The pubic bone, The very bottom of the torso, Feeling through the genitals, Feeling the aliveness of the genitals, The sweetness. And if mine gets chatty in an attempt to distract, No problem but let's just see, Let's just bring awareness back to sensation, Maybe back to the feeling of the chair, The feeling of your clothes on your pelvis. And then let awareness just sink deeper to fully take your own seat in your pelvis, All through the back, All through the sides, And all through the front and the bottom, Sinking in and letting any pressure buildup just naturally come out the soft mouth. To savor the sensation of your being is the whole gig. And your being includes your body and much, Much more. It's all for your enjoyment, Your edification. It's not to prove anything or do anything or achieve anything. It's for the sake of itself, Just the pleasure of being in your own body. What is it to feel through from inside the pelvis down into those gorgeous legs of yours? The alive legs of those big bands of fibers and muscle and bone, Savoring being inhabited in your legs. And as we go, There can be pockets that feel a bit dense or pained. What would it be to just stay with that spot, Not with any effort, But with a warm bath of awareness, Like a warm washcloth, A warm bath, Just gently, Ever so gently soothing that spot, Totally accepting, Totally allowing it to be exactly as it is, But not neglecting it, Not leaving it to itself, Coming in to just bathe it, To just connect with it. Maybe it's in your knees. Maybe your knees could use that warm bath all the way through the kneecaps and the joints themselves. Awareness is a conductor of energy. It naturally opens the lymph, Blood, The energy. Just feeling through from inside the knees now, Down inside those lower legs, Those beautiful shin bones and calf muscles, And the skin of the lower legs. Can you feel through the layers of skin? Not with your mind, But just with awareness itself. It can soak all the way into those bones, Just for the enjoyment of it. And down into those ankles, The ankle joints, Soaking those ankles with awareness. And now we've got these alive, Vibrant feet. Awareness, Savoring being you, Witnessing, Being with these amazing feet that are a mystery. All this energy, All these bones, All put together so intricately, Having nothing to do with you. All you need to do is enjoy it. Let's take your seat inside your body. That aliveness is down at the bottoms of your feet as well, Tingling, Just the energy there. And that aliveness goes through the bottoms of the feet down into the earth. No separation. Your mind would have to tell a story of separation there, But from awareness there's a continuity. Because it is not a separate body actually, But you need to see for yourself. So just feel that, That's all. Let those bottoms of the feet just open and soften and love to be witnessed and love to be soaked in awareness. Our whole body feels so safe, So loved when we inhabit it. More than anything else, Our awareness, Just awareness, Really, Really cues the body. It's safe, It's loved, It's connected. You're the awareness for the job. And it takes no concentration, No effort at all. Thank God. Just a willingness, Willingness to feel yourself. Great, And then let's come up to that spine again, Traveling up from that lower back inside those vertebrae. Awareness can dive deep and go big, It's so versatile. See if you can just feel into those vertebrae a little bit, Starting from maybe the warmth of the chair and then coming inside. We can't figure it, We can't know it, But we can feel an embodiment inside the spine, Inside the organs. What is it to just feel inside your organs, Not knowing which is which, Not knowing anything about it mentally. There's unbelievable intelligence inside the body that has nothing to do with the story, And when we inhabit the body, All this intelligence is unlocked more and more. In the stomach, In the kidneys, In the spleen, Just feeling into your whole midsection, Letting it be soft. Savoring the feeling of being inside the muscles and the tissues and the organs, And letting the whole thing just soften and drop down into the pelvis. Spill out the sides, Spill out the front. You don't have to hold your guts in. The belly is soft, And let's let the solar plexus be soft, Too. Often quite a grip here, But it doesn't matter. It's just a bathing in awareness, A feeling through, And that willingness will, It'll do itself. You don't have to effort at all. Just be willing to touch the solar plexus area, To bathe it with the awareness, Just feeling through it. See what happens. With no agenda, Just a willingness for those two to touch, Those two that aren't really two. Maybe you can feel through the back of the solar plexus, And what happens when awareness just feels through right in the back by the spine there, Right under the ribcage, Just feeling that spot, The body loving to be touched, Actually. We all love attention. We all need a lot of attention, A lot of touch, A lot of loving. So just letting that back of the solar plexus soften and all through the bottom of the ribcage, Exhaling the pressure there, Savoring it. Maybe you can feel right in the middle in front of the spine, Kind of a juicy spot there, Just awareness, And then on up the spine, The vertebrae, Each vertebrae right in the back of the heart there, All through the vertebrae in the back of the heart and right in front of the spine toward the middle of the chest, Just feeling through, Getting comfy in there. It's okay if mind starts up, It doesn't matter. It's a stream in an ocean, Ocean of awareness. It's a stream at the surface, But you can dive underneath and you can dive into sensation. That deep, Vast awareness can feel all through your back here, All through that back and the back of the heart and into the ribcage and on either side of the spine. There is a conduit of energy moving through your spine. You don't have to conduct it, You don't have to do anything, But being aware of it is delicious, And it helps it to just function well, To open a bit more. And all through the ribcage and your back body, Coming up into those scapula and shoulder blades a bit, Just soaking awareness all through your whole back, Leaning back like the back of a chair, A comfy chair, Reclining in the back of yourself. You can relax, You can recline, You don't have to come forward, You don't have to hold your back. And we can feel through the ribcage along the sides, Letting it soften and open, Letting the ribcage just dissolve like hard salt crystals all through the tissues of the ribcage. Can we bathe it with that warm awareness and feel a bit of dissolve when those two touch? Natural process again, Awareness touching into the sternum, To the front of the ribs, Soaking through, Soaking into the lungs, Feeling into the heart. Maybe you feel the energy, Maybe there's just a ton of density and pain here. All welcome, Not one thing a problem, Just bringing awareness to soak through anyway, To be willing to touch it anyway, To bring a bit of curiosity but not mental curiosity to that pain, To that density in the chest, To want to be with it like you would want to be with your most beloved friend or pet. Can we want to be with that ache or that knot just for now, Just for now? You can neglect it again later but just for now what would it be to just bathe that knot, Bathe that pain right in the middle of the chest or the front or the back and then really just taking that awareness to bathe through the whole chest, All through those shoulder blades, All through the front coming up to the collarbone, Just feeling through, Savoring the feeling of being inside your whole chest and up into those shoulders and shoulder blades, The big shoulder muscles melting as the awareness just bathes through. We can come down into those arms from inside the shoulder blades, Inside the shoulder joints. It's just this beautiful connectedness we sometimes think is separate but there's not one thing separate. See if you can feel how big your shoulders are energetically, Beyond the skin. Awareness can feel that and down into the big arms, Vibrant, Alive arms and bones in the arms, Down through the elbows and the lower arms and those vibrant hands. Awareness, Aware of the energy body, That vibration, That pulse, That aliveness, It doesn't have a clear line. The body has boundaries, It'll take care of itself including the energy body, You don't have to monitor or manage it, I promise. You just have to be aware of what's here and that amplifies all that functioning that's built in without a manager, Built into the hands. Great and let's come up to the neck, Traveling up the spine from between the shoulder blades up into the neck. See if you can just feel those vertebrae awareness diving in, Bathing through, Savoring the feeling of the energy in the spine. Often a lot of aches and pains in the neck, Densities, Grips, It's totally, Totally welcome. We're not trying to get rid of them, We're bathing them. That warm washcloth of awareness just bathing through into the throat, The base of the throat, Base of the spine there and then soaking through all sides of the neck from the inside, The left and the right, The front and the back, Letting the neck just naturally expand as it's bathed, As it's inhabited. Maybe especially that knot, Giving it a little extra love and a little extra feeling through, Letting the neck expand and soften. No effort, Just an allowing. Awareness will do it all. It doesn't need your effort or your trying, Although we honor and we bow to that trier, So cute. Let's just really savor the feeling of being inside your own neck and then just bring that, Extend that up into the head, So the base of the brain, The base of the skull where it meets the spinal cord. Just feeling that, Bring awareness there, Bring awareness to the back of the skull and the back of the brain. Just feeling that you're inside the back of your head, Including where the spine and brain meet. It's okay, It's okay to be inside yourself, To take up, Take fully or take your seat inside your head. Let's come into those temples and then in from there inside the ears and all the way deep inside the ears, Between the ears, Deep inside the head, Right in the middle of the head. It's a sensation, It's very alive there. And right in the middle of the head we can go from there to right through to the top of the head. That crown chakra, Just feeling the top of your head from inside the middle of the head, All the way through the brain, Through the skull and through the top of the head, Just savoring that feeling of being connected there, Open there. Just awareness. And then coming forward, Slowly but surely coming forward through the temples, Through the forebrain and front of the skull, Down from the top, Bathing through that warm awareness, Just bathing the front of the brain, Bathing behind the eyeballs and the eyelids, All through the eye sockets and the sinuses, All through those eyebrows, Between the eyebrows, Awareness just so gently and lovingly bathing it all. The roof of the mouth and the back of the throat, Just feeling through, All the way forward through those cheekbones and those nose and the lips and the teeth. Awareness can soak through, It can deeply be in contact with our face. It's not a one-shot deal, We'll notice there's a lot of tension. Just for now to just bathe through, To be willing to feel your own face, To feel it soften, To drop our masks. Feeling the lips, Feeling the jawbone, The lower lip, The chin, The flesh under our jaw. Just feeling the whole head, The whole head soften and open, All through the back, All through the front and the top. Just letting the whole head open like a peony. It naturally does it with the sunshine of awareness, Just a little more and a little more. Same with the neck, Just feeling through the neck again and down through the torso, Letting it just soften and fall open. All down through the heart and the belly and the pelvis again, Just savoring the feeling of just bathing again, All through the back body and the front body and deep in the middle. Just awareness, Just soaking through one last big soak, Down through the pelvis and down through the legs. Like warm water pouring through the head, Warm oil pouring all through the skin, All seeping in down into the bones, Down, Down, Down through the legs and the feet, Being warmly, Warmly, Warmly bathed. And that warm bath just starts to expand the body and you can start to feel this openness, This spaciousness, That warmth that permeates the whole body and permeates the whole room, Just space. You're saturated in warm spaciousness. You're made of it. See if you can see it's also warm spaciousness in the floor and out through those walls and up into the sky. There's nowhere that this warm spacious presence isn't. It's permeable. It's permeating. Awareness can be aware of that sweet spaciousness. And if you can feel that sweet spaciousness in the room more or in an area of the body more, See if you can just let it bathe, Let it breeze through slowly and gently through that area that's a bit denser. That warm water just naturally merging, Dissolving that salt crystal wherever it's a bit dense, A bit in pain. Natural process, No effort required, Just the willingness to have those two touch. That vast spacious warm awareness, Bathing, This beloved spot that's been a bit neglected. That's all. We don't need a story about it. Just let awareness do it all. And this vast spacious awareness sound moves through. It's just so effortless, Just sound waves. Nothing to do with you. You can feel that sound. You can feel the sound of my voice. And then when my voice drops away, There is a quietness. As Kiran says, It's just the quietest thing here. It's not hidden. And it too is completely saturating you, Completely saturating the room. When my voice drops away, Notice it's all so much silence. And sounds don't block it. In fact, They point it out. So we're just gonna bathe in this vast, Warm, Soft quietness. Let it bathe you. This quietness is also alive. You can explore. You can let it keep bathing you. You can swim in it, Swim as it. You can let it just be its most delicious path for you. Just let silence have you and have you and have you. It's okay if you lose yourself. Nothing's actually lost. Nothing at all. You don't have to remember your name. Nothing. Life's already living you, So we just let it live you all the more. Such a support here. Just keep following that quiet, That alive, Warm quiet that you're already saturated in. You're not left out even a little bit. It just is delicious to feel it, To be deeply aware of the total nourishment you're swimming in. You are. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. We can stay totally saturated in this formless silence. You'll always be saturated in it. You'll always be made of it. And we can be aware of form. It's not separate the form, But it has a little more collected energy. It's three-dimensional. So right now as your eyes are still closed, If they're closed, You just feel the body, Feel the form side of formlessness. That it's not actually separate, It just has a different quality. It still holds the quality of formlessness in your hands or in your feet as you just be aware of the body, Aware of that signature of form. And maybe that form, This particular form, Could use a little stretch as you slowly, Slowly, In your own time, Open your eyes, But staying aware of that formless dimension that's still here, Still soaking you.

Reviews

I am so grateful for the direction and focus that I experienced. So deep.