Welcome,
Friends.
This is Padma Gordon,
And I want to offer you a meditation called Leaves on the River.
So this meditation is to help you create distance.
Distance and compassion around any disturbing or repetitive thoughts you might be having.
This practice teaches you that thoughts are not commands.
They're not evidence of your character.
They don't mean anything about you.
And you don't need to fight with them.
They are mental events.
That you can simply observe and release.
Let's get comfortable.
Just take a moment to please settle in wherever you are.
Let your body find a comfortable position.
And if it feels right,
Close your eyes.
Just let your lids feel heavy.
Let's take a nice breath in,
And then let it go.
So before we go any further or drop deeper,
I just want to say something to you.
The thoughts that scare you don't define you.
You are not defined by your thoughts.
The fact that they disturb you.
Shows they are not who you are.
Because someone who truly wanted those things wouldn't be tormented by them.
Your distress is proof of your goodness,
My friend,
Not evidence of something dark or wrong with you.
So let's just begin with the breath.
Breathing in slowly through your nose.
Let's do that for a count of four and then hold.
2,
3,
4,
Hold.
And release through the mouth for a count of six.
1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6.
Just let the exhale be longer than the inhale.
This signals to your body to slow down and soften its grip.
Let's do that again.
Breathing in for four,
Hold,
And out for six.
Here we go.
And now for six.
Beautiful.
Now.
I want you to imagine that you're sitting on the bank of a river.
The water is moving steadily.
It's not rushing.
It's not still,
Just flowing.
The surface catches the light.
The sound is soft and constant.
You are sitting comfortably on the bank.
Just watching the water move.
Watching the water move.
And now,
I invite you to imagine that your thoughts are leaves floating on the surface of this river.
Every thought that arises,
Pleasant,
Neutral,
Or disturbing.
Lands.
And floats downstream.
You don't need to grab any of these leaves.
You don't need to push any of them under the water or analyze where they came from or what they mean.
Just simply watch them arrive,
And then watch them pass,
Just arriving and passing away.
Here comes a thought now.
Maybe it's ordinary,
What you'll have for dinner,
Or maybe something someone said.
Watch it land on a leaf.
And then watch it float away.
And here comes another.
Maybe this one is stranger,
Darker,
More unwelcome.
You might notice an urge to react,
To grab it or fight it.
Or a need to know why it's here.
And instead.
.
.
With all the gentleness you can find.
Let it land on its leaf.
Watch the current take it.
It's moving.
It's already going.
The nature of a river is to flow.
The nature of the mind is to produce thoughts.
All kinds of thoughts.
Your mind generates thousands of them every day.
And most pass without you noticing.
The ones that stick are the ones you react to.
Ones you grab and hold up to the light and say,
What does this mean about me?
And this grabbing,
This holding,
Is where suffering lives.
It's not in the thought itself.
But in the grip.
So friends,
Let's practice the release.
Whatever thought comes next.
Notice it.
Name it if you can.
Perhaps there's a thought about harm or there's a fear of something bad happening.
There's an image in your mind you didn't ask for.
Naming it creates distance.
Naming it creates distance.
It turns the thought from something you are into something you are observing.
You are not the thought,
You are the one witnessing it.
So just take a nice breath in.
And then out.
And on the next breath,
Breathing in.
And as you breathe out,
Let's release.
Imagine your fingers uncurling from around that thought.
Just let it go.
It doesn't need your permission to leave,
It just needs you to stop holding on.
Intrusive thoughts thrive on resistance.
The more you fight them,
The more your brain flags them as important.
The more you try to suppress them,
The more urgently they return.
This doesn't mean anything about you.
It's just how human minds work.
So what's the antidote?
A gentle,
Patient indifference.
Oh,
That thought again.
Okay.
And you gently turn back to the river.
So let's try something now.
If you're willing.
Whatever intrusive thought has been visiting you lately,
Allow it to come.
Don't invite it.
And don't barricade the door.
If it arrives,
Simply say inwardly.
I notice I'm having the thought that.
.
.
And you fill in the blank.
I notice I'm having the thought that.
.
.
For instance,
I notice I'm having the thought that something bad will happen,
Or I notice I'm having the thought that I could lose control.
So when you add,
I notice I'm having the thought that this gives you some distance.
You're stepping back.
You become the observer.
Rather than.
The participant.
You are no longer identified with the thoughts.
You are the observer.
Let's breathe in deeply.
And imagine a wide open sky.
Your thoughts are clouds moving through that sky.
Some are puffy,
White,
And soft.
Some are dark and heavy,
And the sky itself remains unchanged.
It doesn't become a cloud.
It holds the clouds and lets them pass.
And you,
You are the sky.
You are the sky.
And now,
Let's return to the river.
Listen to the water.
Feel the bank beneath you.
Solid,
Warm,
Stable.
It's holding you.
You are here.
And you are not your thoughts,
You are the awareness in which thoughts arise and dissolve,
Just like ripples on water,
Like leaves on a current.
Like clouds across an endless sky.
Let's take three more breaths at your own pace.
And with each exhale.
You're invited to release any thought you've been gripping.
You don't need it.
It was never yours to begin with.
And then slowly,
Slowly.
When you're ready.
You are invited to gently open the eyes.
Know that every time you practice letting a thought float by without engaging,
You are retraining your brain.
You are creating new neural pathways,
And it gets easier and easier.
And you are already doing it.
So feel welcome to practice this meditation repeatedly.
For a week,
Two weeks,
Or three weeks,
And see what happens.
Notice how your life changes.
And how you have more and more access to peace,
To the endless sky of peace.
