Hi,
This is Orie Krug here and today we are going to go through a movement meditation on identifying and letting go of your fear of hurting other people.
This is such an important pattern and habit to break because when we consistently act from a place of not wanting to hurt others,
We end up abandoning our own needs and hurting ourselves.
In the short term,
It may feel easier to make sure that someone else doesn't get offended or that they're happy or not uncomfortable,
But in the long run,
We don't get what we need from relationships.
And this fear of hurting someone usually runs real deep in our bodies from old traumas that when we've hurt someone in the past,
It meant we got hurt twice as much.
Perhaps they retaliated and wanted to hurt us even more.
Or when we've hurt somebody who was really emotionally unstable in our lives,
It meant that we had created so much more chaos and discomfort in our lives because we hurt somebody.
And I'm here to remind you that none of that is your fault.
And I'm going to take you through a movement experience where we can start to break that pattern today.
So start in any position that feels right for you.
You can be lying down on the ground.
You can be sitting up on the floor or in a chair.
You might even find yourself wanting to stand up.
So just take a moment to get comfortable.
And find a position,
A starting position that feels right for you.
And we're going to take three deep breaths in.
Breathing in.
And breathing out.
Again,
Breathing in.
And breathing out.
One more time,
Breathing in.
And breathing out.
And at this point,
If your eyes aren't already closed or if your gaze hasn't lowered yet,
Go ahead and close your eyes or lower your gaze.
We're going to take a look inside our bodies right now.
So you can imagine that there is a little you moving around,
Crawling around,
Walking around,
However you see this image.
There's a little you traveling inside your body with a flashlight.
And as you have this image and hold on to it,
I want you to imagine something really relevant in your life today where you're wanting to do or say something with somebody,
But you have that fear of hurting them.
I want you to picture that scenario right now,
As real as you can,
Thinking of a situation where you're either wanting to say something or do something or you have said something or done something with that intense fear of hurting them.
There's no right or wrong.
Just go with the first thing that comes to your imagination.
And as you picture yourself going through with whatever you actually really need to say or do,
Imagine how that feels.
Imagine how that fear of hurting them feels inside your body.
And as soon as you feel that,
Shine your flashlight on that part of your body.
You want to go with the very first feeling that came up.
So no second guessing yourself here.
Just go with the first sensation that comes up in the first part of your body that is alerted.
For example,
It could be that I felt it in my stomach right away and I felt a nervous feeling kind of like a worm crawling through my stomach.
You can get as specific with your image as you want.
And the more specific,
The better.
So shine a light on that sensation.
See what's going on there.
Is it tightening?
Is it constricting?
Is it shrinking?
Is it exploding?
Is it expanding?
When you shine that flashlight on that first sensation that comes up,
Really,
Really look at it.
See what color it is.
The first color that comes to mind.
So it can be my stomach feels like there's worms crawling through it and it looks dark and muddy and brown.
Get really specific because that will help you bring this into your life.
And as you get a hold on that,
Just notice if the sensation is carrying over anywhere else,
Anywhere else in your body.
If not,
We can just stay focused in one place.
Just see if there's anywhere else.
Perhaps the feeling in my stomach rises up to my chest and it constricts my chest.
And I can see that all happening in red.
I can feel that.
Just take a moment to really feel how this fear feels in your body.
And now I'm going to invite you for about a minute to move however you need to move from these sensations in order to relieve and let it go a little bit in this moment.
You don't want to expect to just let go of it all.
This will take some time and some work since it's often a really deeply held belief in fear.
But just for this moment,
How do you,
How does your body want to move in order to relieve some of that tension or that sensation?
Go ahead now for the next minute and move.
Just to give you an example,
For my stomach and chest,
I might just want to move my upper body in circles and stretch it and bring my chest forward,
Stretch that as well.
So there's no right or wrong,
But just go with how you want to move.
Now starting to really slow down your movement now,
Don't stop abruptly,
But just gradually slowly start bringing your movement to a close to a point where you feel like you've had a fair closure with this movement experience and feel satisfied.
As you're finishing up,
Let's take another deep breath in together and out.
Again,
In and out.
Keeping your eyes closed or lowering your gaze,
Just want you to take a imaginary picture of that sensation you felt or the sensations that you felt as you were connecting to your fear of hurting other people.
This is the feeling that we want to remember,
Not so that we carry it with us intentionally all the time because that's already happening,
But so that when it comes up in the moment,
We recognize that actually what I'm feeling now is coming from the place of my fear of hurting others.
So when you identify that sensation coming up,
The one that you just experienced,
Then you know,
You can acknowledge it gently.
You can have a phrase,
No thanks,
I'm going to be really real with what I need here and set my boundary as I need it,
Even if it hurts someone else.
I'm strong enough and I can take care of myself.
Whatever words work for you.
This is the key to changing the patterns is noticing when your intention is coming from a place of hurting others,
Gently,
Kindly acknowledging that in yourself and then proactively changing that and coming from a different place and staying true to you instead.
In order to solidify your experience,
You can write down what the sensation felt like or even better to keep the imagery going,
You can draw.
Just draw what it felt like because the more we solidify it,
The better and quicker we can recognize it in the moment.
So let's take one deep breath before you go on and process this even further in a drawing or in writing.
Breathing in and breathing out.
Thank you.
