We live in a world obsessed with the finite game.
The game that has rules,
Winners,
And losers.
But what if I told you that true leadership,
True impact,
And true fulfillment comes not from winning a single game,
But from playing an entirely different one,
A much bigger game,
And that's the infinite game?
Let me take you to the desert outside San Diego,
Where I wandered in search of answers just a few years ago.
And this is a place that I have come to love,
And it's where the land breeds wisdom,
Ancient wisdom.
During a solo fast in the wilderness,
I found myself sitting in the presence of these ancient cliff sides that had stood around for millennia.
The sun dipped below the horizon,
And the wind whispered through the canyons as if it were carrying stories from our ancestors.
I had been chasing success the way most of us do,
Checking off goals,
Climbing ladders,
Seeking recognition.
But as I sat alone under that big vast sky,
I felt the hollowness of that pursuit.
The rocks did not care about my achievements.
The wind did not validate my ambitions.
And in that moment,
Something shifted inside of me.
I remembered some ancient wisdom.
I realized that I was placing my value on the wrong game.
I come to realize that much like the cycles of nature,
The infinite game is about rhythm,
Adaptation,
And evolution.
It is about aligning with something much greater than ourselves,
The timeless forces that shape our world.
And that realization is what I want to dive in deeper with you here today.
And it's the wisdom that I hope to instill in my children as well.
And to be clear,
It's not that the finite games are bad,
But when we place so much focus on them,
We lose sight of the bigger picture.
So let's break this down a bit more.
There are two kinds of games that we play in this world.
There are finite games,
And then there are infinite games.
Finite games include a clear set of rules,
A defined set of players,
A clear finish line,
And there is a winner and there is a loser.
The infinite games include rules that change,
No clear finish line,
Any set of players,
And there's no winners and there's no losers.
So let's break this down into some examples of what this looks like.
And again,
I want to be clear and say they're complementary.
Both finite games and infinite games have tremendous value.
A degree,
A college degree,
University degree,
That's a finite game.
A yoga certification,
That's a finite game.
Lifelong learning is an infinite game.
Being able to take a full deep breath,
That's an infinite game.
A promotion is a finite game.
A career built on purpose is an infinite game.
A marketing campaign,
That's a finite game.
Creating a business that changes culture,
That is an infinite game.
You feel the difference?
So why do so many of us get trapped in finite games?
It's because we are raised in systems that reward measurable short-term outcomes.
So think about it for a moment.
In school,
We focus on grades rather than the joy of learning.
In business,
We focus on quarterly KPIs rather than long-term innovation.
In leadership,
We focus so much on climbing the ladders rather than lifting others up.
But here's the thing.
When you focus only on playing the finite games,
You will burn out.
You will feel like you're always chasing something just out of reach.
And the moment you win,
The game resets and you have to start all over again.
It's a perfect recipe for burnout.
So how do we bring in the bigger picture?
How do we play the infinite game as well?
So here's three shifts to consider.
The first is to redefine success.
Instead of asking,
How do I win?
Ask,
How do I continue growing?
Instead of chasing titles and promotions,
Cultivate deep mastery and impact.
Instead of measuring progress by external validation,
Measure it by internal alignment,
Something that we profoundly realize deep in meditation.
The second is to commit to playing for tomorrow and not just for today.
What do I mean by that?
I'm particularly referring to building a world that our children will grow up in.
Build systems that outlast you.
Mentor others because the infinite game is not meant to be played alone.
Focus on regenerative leadership,
Leading in a way that creates more leaders,
Not just pure results.
And the third here is to embrace uncertainty and adaptability,
Or what Pema Chodron calls impermanence in her work.
The rules of the infinite game change.
They're supposed to.
So focus less on trying to wait for the ground to stop shaking or to find equal footing,
And more,
Increase your ability to be nimble and flexible.
In the finite game,
Fear of failure is paralyzing.
In the infinite game,
Failure is information.
It's a data point.
So what do I mean by this?
I mean,
Stay curious,
Stay open,
And stay willing to be transformed by the game itself.
After my time in the desert,
I began to see my life and the way I was leading myself and others through an entirely new lens.
I learned that the land does not rush,
And it certainly doesn't cling to certainty.
It shifts,
It adapts,
And it continues,
It perseveres.
We too must learn to embrace this new way of being.
We must move beyond rigid strategies and embrace the evolving nature of our work,
And what I would say,
Perhaps more importantly,
Our personal growth and development.
Just as the land teaches us patience and resilience,
The way we lead ourselves and our teams must be cultivated with care,
With the awareness that we are tending a garden,
We are garden tenders,
And these fruits may never fully be seen by us in our lifetimes.
And that's hard,
That's hard to stomach,
Especially if our egos want to see the value of our work right here,
Right now.
That impatience,
Trust me,
I get that.
Yet this is the heart of the Infinite Game,
Understanding that our impact is not measured by a single outcome,
But by the ripple effect,
The beautiful ripples that we set out in motion.
Playing the Infinite Game is not about winning,
It's about playing in a way that sustains you,
Your teams,
And the world around you.
What I've come to realize is that when we embrace the Infinite Game,
We build companies that last,
We establish relationships that deepen and really sustain us throughout life,
And we have an impact that echoes beyond our single lifetime.
This type of lifestyle is the one that leaves a legacy,
Not because we set out for it,
But because we couldn't imagine leading any other way.
So the question I leave with you today is this,
What is the Infinite Game that you are here to play in this life?
I know that's a big question,
So sit with it.
What is the Infinite Game you are here to play,
And how will you take your next step in it?
Once you clearly identify the Infinite Game that you're playing,
You're then able to see the value of the finite games,
The goals that you set,
And how they clearly connect to the Infinite Game.
And that way,
When you lose in a finite game,
It doesn't take you out.
It's merely a data point,
It's a stepping stone.
And when you win,
Of course,
Celebrate and then continue moving forward knowing that your life is playing the Infinite Game.
So thanks so much for being here,
And thanks for playing the game that truly matters.
