A Gentle Pause: Loving the Unlovable

A short pause and gentle reminder. Our wounded parts will seek love in the most unlovable ways. True healing comes not from learning to transcend or get beyond them, but in learning how to invite them to sit alongside us. To gently turn toward them, meeting them with compassion and acceptance; offering them the medicine of our wise presence.

Transcript

It is such a human response to pick out all that's wrong,

All the ways that we have perceived ourselves to have failed or fallen short or being not good enough in some way.

So when you find yourself in this place,

Rather than becoming identified with that state,

With the heavy emotions and the hostile thoughts that it brings,

See if it's at all possible to meet that suffering,

That pain,

That wounding from a place of compassion and love.

Instead of reflexively being swallowed up by the darkness,

Inviting it to sit alongside you as you gently turn toward it and see it for what it is,

Not badness or wrongness,

Just pain.

Knowing that to judge or attack or reject it will only strengthen it,

Like pouring fuel on a fire.

And just like the child that is acting out and behaving in ways that are so challenging to offer kindness and understanding to,

They are merely asking for love in unlovable ways.

Your wounded parts are doing the same.

They may present in unthinkably cruel thoughts,

Stories,

Judgements,

And yet if we can be present and wise enough to see through the hostility,

We would witness scared,

Abandoned,

Hurt,

Wounded parts,

Parted for the elixir of our love,

Our inclusion,

Our acceptance.

Begging for love and validation,

Longing to be told they matter.

They belong.

We spend entire lifetimes and immense amounts of life energy fighting with these elements of our shadow,

Willing and wishing them away,

Condoning their expression,

Denying their existence and disparaging the ways in which they seek attention.

But they are here,

And however much we may wish them away,

They are a part of our story and a part of our journey.

And the paradox of it all is that the way to unburden and heal them isn't through denial,

But through acceptance.

Reviews

Thank you for the reminder to love my wounded parts . 🦋🩵🦋🩵🦋🩵

So full of wisdom, grace, and guidance. Thank you!

I love this message. Thank you

A beautiful reminder to acknowledge and accept ourselves fully as we continue on our journey towards self growth and self love. 💕

Mar

You are an amazing teacher. Your voice … your words… wow. This is such a short meditation but you packed in a powerful and moving message. I can’t wait to send this to friends!

Thank you and Namaste🦋🦋🦋

You always ground me with your insight. Your words comfort my soul & bring me home. I am full of gratitude. Thank you, Mar Healy.🫶🏼

Perfect . This was everything I have been trying to articulate myself, but had not been able to put into words. I am finding myself in a few relationships that are not serving me any longer, yet I am not able to change. I do not like who I am or have been for a few years now. I grieve for the woman I once was and wonder if I will ever find even a sliver of her again. I needed a short message, succinct yet powerful to continue to tell myself exactly what you did; I'm not bad, I'm hurting. ❤️

Thank you so much 🙏🏼 you just spoke to my soul when I really needed it

I wish this were longer and allowed for more time just to be present to those parts in pain. ❤️🙏

I appreciated the reframing offered in this meditation

So powerfully beautiful…. a gentle key to help unlock and begin to heal and love my pain and broken parts ❤️‍🩹 thank you

Astonishingly heartfelt and beautiful words. The message resonates and the voice is mesmerising. I could listen for much longer Xx🙏🏻🌞🔥💕

Such a good reminder. Acceptance allows unburdening. Thank you for this, Mar!

You have no idea how much this message resonated with me. It’s not just self compassion, but acceptance of what we judge about ourselves that will set us free. Thank you so much.

Excellent words . Your message is a great reminder to keep leaning into life. Love is always the way!
Thank you

I'm grateful humble a Christian Actor singer with Courage kindness and a Purpose Amen and so it is

Psychologically healing with poetic undertones. Powerful and beautiful. Thank you.

What an incredible meditation! A heaven sent message ♥️

So much truth! Thank you Mar💕💗Love seems to always be the answer!

Great message... Make friends with the internal enemies.