Embodied Forgiveness

How do we approach forgiveness when at times it seems impossible? One answer is, gently & slowly. In this guided somatic mindfulness session we engage the support of ground, breath, and body awareness to gradually unclench our heart. Sometimes, it is enough to have the aspiration to give and receive forgiveness. Sometimes that is enough. This guided somatic meditation is based on teachings from Stephen Levine.

Transcript

Hello,

This is Meg Rinaldi of Body Centered Inquiry,

And welcome to this guided somatic audio,

Embodied Forgiveness.

For this session,

I'll be guiding as if you're sitting comfortably.

You can sit in a chair with your feet flat on the floor,

Or be sitting cross-legged.

You may also do this session lying comfortably on your back,

With good support for your head,

Neck and low back.

Remove your glasses,

Belt,

Remove your shoes and have sock or bare feet.

Gather whatever props you need,

Turn off the tech you don't need,

And allow yourself to slowly arrive.

Slowly let your awareness begin to shift inwardly.

Close your eyes or allow for a soft gaze.

Let your attention begin to gather around your connection to the chair,

To the ground.

Anywhere we are is on the ground.

If sitting on a chair,

Bring your awareness to your sit bones and your feet flat on the floor.

If you're sitting cross-legged,

Notice how your legs make connection to one another.

And if lying on your back,

Notice the support of the ground beneath you.

Whatever you've chosen to arrange your body in this moment,

Let yourself arrive.

Allow the ground to hold you.

There's nothing to do but be.

Be right here,

Right now.

Safely resting on the ground,

Breathing in and breathing out.

Allow your hands and arms to rest comfortably.

Let yourself settle.

The more we can settle in our body,

The more our mind can settle.

The inquiry here is how do we approach forgiveness when at times it seems impossible?

And part of the answer is to go gently and slowly.

In this guided somatic audio,

We engage the support of ground,

Breath and body awareness to gradually unclench our heart.

Sometimes it's enough just to have the aspiration to give and receive forgiveness.

There are three sections in this Embodied Forgiveness Meditation.

The first is to forgive another.

The second section is to receive forgiveness from another.

And the third section is to offer forgiveness to oneself.

You're free to do as much or as little of this session as is right for you right now.

You can pause the audio at any time.

Let your attention gather around the in-breath.

And notice that there's a slight pause at the top of the in-breath.

And then as you let go and breathe out,

There's a natural pause that happens right after the exhale.

These are natural pauses that occur automatically in our breathing if we let them.

This is an excellent practice for allowing us to settle and be with ourselves anywhere we go.

Breathing in,

It's a natural pause.

Breathing out,

There's another natural pause.

Take your time.

Pause the audio.

If busy thoughts of this or that come in,

Allow them to arrive and go.

There's nothing you have to do right now except rest.

And this could be the whole session for you.

Simply the practice of arriving and resting.

If you choose to continue,

Bring to mind someone for whom you have resentment.

It could be the smallest thing.

A small hurt.

So often we labor under so many small hurts.

And with a sense of the ground beneath you,

Settling in,

In-breath,

Pause,

Out-breath and pause.

Notice whatever fear or anger you have around allowing this person's entry into your mind right now.

Be gentle with the fear or the anger.

There's no need to struggle with it.

This is an experiment in allowing yourself to know how you truly feel about a person or situation.

Forgiveness doesn't need to be rushed.

Sometimes it happens in a moment and sometimes it takes more than a lifetime.

The intent here is to release your heart gradually and in safety.

If it's possible for you right now,

In your mind's eye,

Turn toward that person with forgiveness.

You can say to yourself or out loud,

I forgive you.

I forgive you.

If it's not possible right now,

Know that just the inspiration to forgive,

Just taking this moment for an experiment in healing,

Is enough.

If it is possible to offer forgiveness,

Notice how that feels in your body as you say,

I forgive you.

See if you can be present to the difference in sensations in your body between not offering forgiveness and the sensations that go with offering forgiveness.

It's okay to take all the time you need and with awareness your body will let you know these differences in sensation.

If possible,

Allow yourself one more time of offering them forgiveness with,

I forgive you.

I forgive you.

Given your awareness of ground,

Breath and sensation,

Come back to that.

If possible,

Offer your forgiveness once again.

Forgive them for what they did,

What they didn't do,

What they said or didn't say,

Or perhaps even for what they thought or didn't think.

Again go slowly,

Do what's possible for you in this moment and let the rest go.

You are planting seeds.

Forgiveness is not condoning any inappropriate behavior or actions.

It is not about rationalizing bad behavior or a spiritual bypass.

It is about letting ourselves off the hook and spending fewer hours of our lives thinking we're punishing someone else by withholding our forgiveness,

When in fact that person may have long ago moved on and we are the ones still suffering.

Let that image of that person go now,

Wishing them well and rest.

Let yourself be and rest.

After 27 years in prison,

Nelson Mandela said,

Had he not learned to forgive his captors,

He would still be imprisoned even though he'd physically left the jail.

And so it is for each of us.

If you choose to continue with this exploration,

Let's go on.

And if that's enough for you right now,

You can pause the audio and come back another time.

And if you choose to continue,

Bring to mind someone who has resentment toward you.

And breathe.

Be aware of any holding of your breath,

Any tension around your face,

Your jaw,

Mouth,

Eyes,

Any tightening anywhere in your body.

Be aware of the ground that is always there to hold you no matter what.

And if you're ready,

With no pushing or pulling in your heart,

Invite in someone who has resentment toward you.

Notice whatever limits their entrance,

Go slowly and gently.

Give yourself permission to move at your own pace.

In your mind's eye,

Turn toward this person.

And if you're able to right now,

Say,

I ask your forgiveness.

I ask to be let back into your heart.

I ask that you forgive me for whatever I may have done,

What I may not have done,

What I have said or didn't say.

Notice your connection to the ground,

Your breathing,

Your quality of mind.

If possible in this moment,

Allow yourself to be let back into their heart.

Let yourself receive forgiveness.

If there's something that prevents you from receiving their forgiveness,

Notice that.

And also be aware of how cruel the mind can be.

I ask your forgiveness.

I ask to be let back into your heart,

That you forgive me for whatever I may have done,

What I may not have done,

What I said,

Perhaps what I didn't say.

Breathing and let it all go and rest.

Be respectful of your limits in this process.

And forgiveness is a process,

Not a once and for all.

Even the shoulds around forgiving can be a barrier to it.

Many of us know we should forgive and be forgiven.

But we're seldom given the permission to take our time with it and move at the pace of self-compassion.

And rest.

And if you choose to continue,

There's one last forgiveness process.

While being aware of your connection to the ground and your breathing,

Offer yourself forgiveness.

I forgive myself for what I've done,

For what I've not done,

For what I've said,

For what I've not said,

Whatever it is,

Or however it is,

That I've caused pain or confusion.

I forgive myself.

Notice what arises that may prevent you from offering forgiveness to yourself.

And notice how you meet what arises.

Can you acknowledge whatever might be in the way of offering yourself forgiveness and touch those barriers with a bit of kindness?

Allow yourself to meet those different parts of your psyche with care.

From a depth psychological perspective and a wisdom tradition perspective,

These are parts that often carry long-held family or social burdens,

Cultural narratives that have convinced us we're not worthy of forgiveness.

Notice whatever's present and if possible say,

I forgive you to yourself.

Notice any body sensations that arise as you experiment here.

Notice your breathing,

Your connection to the ground,

And your body sensation.

And if possible,

Gently offer forgiveness to yourself once again with the words,

I forgive you,

I forgive you.

This is an essential practice of self-compassion.

Breathing in,

Pause at the top of the inhale,

Breathing out,

Pausing at the bottom of the exhale.

Gently as can be.

And rest.

And rest some more.

Gently acknowledge yourself for whatever seeds of forgiveness may have been planted.

Sometimes having the aspiration to forgive a little bit and let go a little bit is enough.

Thank you.

This is the end of the session.

Reviews

Beautiful. Peaceful. Thank you for showing me how to practice forgiveness.