Hi there,
It's Mandy here.
And welcome to this practice for befriending your strengths.
I'm so glad you're here.
Today's practice is an invitation to spend a little time getting to know something that can sometimes be easy to overlook,
Your strengths.
When we live with pain,
Fatigue,
Flares,
Stressful situations or uncertainty,
Our attention can naturally become drawn to what's difficult.
What we can't do.
What's changed?
What we wish was different.
And yet alongside all of that.
There may also be qualities that have helped you meet this life.
Perhaps your patience.
Humor.
Creativity.
Determination.
Adaptability.
Sensitivity.
Courage.
The ability to ask for help.
The ability to begin again.
The ability to forgive yourself.
And you know,
Strength doesn't always look like something strong,
Like pushing through.
Sometimes strength is actually in resting.
Sometimes it's in changing your plans.
In setting a boundary.
In accepting support,
Receiving,
Listening.
And sometimes we may discover that a strength that has helped us survive difficult things,
Like perseverance or putting others first,
Can become tiring when we rely on it all the time.
So this practice isn't really about celebrating how much you can endure.
It's about gently noticing the resources that you already have.
And as always,
You're welcome to just take whatever feels useful from this practice and leave behind anything that doesn't.
You can keep your eyes open or closed.
You can move and shift your body,
Change position,
Pause the practice at any time.
Or even stop altogether.
There's nothing you need to achieve here.
It's just an invitation to explore befriending the person who is already doing their best to navigate this life.
So let's settle in and practice together.
Begin by finding a position that feels comfortable and as supportive as possible for your body today.
You might be sitting.
Align.
While standing.
Or even moving and swaying gently.
Perhaps you can feel into the places where your body is being supported.
The chair beneath you,
The bed or the floor.
Whatever's holding you right now just resting back into that support.
Just getting a sense of what it's like to receive support.
And if it feels comfortable just turning your attention towards your breathing.
There's no special way to breathe.
Just noticing this body breathing.
The inhale.
And the exile.
The rhythm and flow.
And just giving yourself permission to move at your own pace.
There's nowhere we need to get to.
And when you're ready,
If it feels comfortable.
You might like to imagine looking at yourself through the eyes of someone who genuinely cares about you.
Someone who knows that life has not always been easy.
Someone who sees the whole picture of you,
Noticing your struggles,
Your limitations,
Your mistakes,
Your hopes and dreams,
And also your good qualities,
Your effort,
Your courage.
Capacity.
Your humanity.
You might like to imagine this person sitting beside you.
They might gently ask.
What have you been getting through?
You don't have to go searching for something dramatic,
Just something small that comes to mind.
Recently you've been getting through this difficult morning.
Or a flare.
A disrupted night's sleep.
Particularly troublesome medical appointments.
Conversation you found hard.
Maybe it was getting through a day when your energy felt really depleted.
He could have been asking for help.
Or making a meal when you were tired.
Could have been something simple as just taking a shower,
Getting outside.
Resting when you needed to.
Beginning again after a difficult day.
Just whatever comes to mind for you.
Something you've been finding hard.
And now gently becoming curious about gathering your own evidence of strength.
Perhaps as you remember this time,
You might be thinking,
I don't know how I got through that.
And yet somehow,
You did.
Maybe it wasn't graceful,
Maybe it wasn't easy.
Maybe you did need other people to help you.
Maybe it took longer than you thought because you needed to rest.
Maybe you had to change your initial plan.
Maybe there were tears.
Maybe there was anger.
Maybe the task took longer because you were simply taking things one moment at a time.
And you made your way through.
And it might feel okay to just quietly acknowledge that.
I have been through difficult things before.
I have found ways to cope.
I've adapted.
I've learned things about myself and grown.
I've made it through moments that I once thought I couldn't handle.
And just allowing these memories to become your evidence.
Not as a way to remind yourself you have to always cope or you need to keep pushing,
But just evidence that you have resources within you.
And around you that have helped you meet these hard moments.
And perhaps bringing to mind one quality you appreciate about yourself,
Something you feel proud of.
Might feel very ordinary and you rarely give yourself credit for it.
Maybe you are thoughtful,
Persistent,
Funny,
Loving.
Curious,
Resourceful.
Patient.
Creative.
Adaptable.
Brave.
Maybe you've learned to listen to your body.
Maybe you've learned to say,
I need some help.
Maybe you've learned to change direction when the original plan no longer works.
Maybe your strength is simply your willingness to keep learning.
Whatever comes to mind seeing if you can spend the next few moments really appreciating this quality in yourself.
Like you would with a friend or a child.
You might imagine looking at this quality with a sense of warmth and honesty.
Oh look at that Look at this thing I have inside me.
Maybe just acknowledging,
I've actually been using this strength for a long time.
This matters.
This is a true part of my identity,
Of who I really am.
Just allowing yourself to recognize what is already here within you.
Just allowing this reminder to land for you that strength doesn't mean being strong all the time.
You can have courage and still feel a little bit frightened.
You can be resilient and still become exhausted.
You can be capable and still need help now and again.
You can still love people deeply and put time aside for yourself.
These are qualities that make us human.
So maybe just offering yourself some words of comfort here.
May I recognise the humanness of each moment.
May I remember that no one is perfect all the time.
May I recognise the strengths I already have.
May I remember that my worth isn't measured by what I accomplish.
May I honour all the ways I have learned to care for myself.
And may I forgive myself when I forget all of this.
And if it feels okay,
You might just remind yourself to.
I'm doing my best.
And my best is going to look different day by day.
My best is allowed to change.
My best can be rest.
My best can include asking for help.
And my best can include beginning again.
Letting these words land however they will.
You don't have to believe every phrase,
Just choosing one that feels supportive and letting go of the rest.
And just honouring all of these ways you have survived,
Reflecting on the ways you've learned to get through the difficult times.
Perhaps you've been very good at carrying on and looking after other people at being dependable.
Putting one foot in front of the other.
And these can be real strengths.
And perhaps,
Sometimes,
They also come at a cost.
There may have been times when pushing through helped you get something important done,
And other times when your body or mind needed something different.
There may have been times when caring for everyone else felt natural,
And other times when you needed care too.
Just knowing there's room for all of this.
We don't need to judge the strategies that helped you get here to this moment.
You might just simply offer yourself some gratitude,
Some befriending,
Some warmth and kindness here.
Thank you for all the ways you have tried to protect and care for me.
Thank you for helping me get through this.
And I can keep discovering new ways of caring for myself too.
And perhaps strength for you becomes something spacious,
That includes flexibility.
It includes receiving as well as giving.
It includes knowing when enough is enough.
And when good enough is also enough.
So just spending the next few moments perhaps imagining,
Gathering a few of these qualities together.
Perhaps picture them as maybe little lights or colors,
Objects,
Words,
Whatever feels easiest to you to imagine.
Gathering up your courage,
Or kindness,
Or adaptability,
Or wisdom,
Or humor.
Persistence.
Connection whatever belongs to you and notice how these qualities don't need to be huge a small amount of courage is still courage A small moment of patience is still patience.
And you might just pause and gently say to yourself,
These are some of the things I bring with me.
These are my resources.
I don't need to use all of them,
But they're here when I need them.
And maybe some of those strengths also come from the people around you.
The friend you call when you need to.
The person who understands what you're going through.
The members of your healthcare team who really listen.
The community that reminds you you're not alone.
Knowing when to reach for these supports can be a huge strength.
So beginning to bring your attention back to this moment,
The support beneath you.
Noticing your body as it is right now.
Maybe there's some ease here or discomfort.
Maybe there's some changes,
Maybe not.
Just noticing,
Recognizing that all parts are welcome.
There's no particular state we were reaching for.
Just spending some time recognizing yourself with fairness and warmth.
And maybe a little more truth.
And before we finish you might just choose one of these strengths or qualities that you'd like to remember.
And quietly offering yourself this wish.
May I accept and remember all the strengths that I have.
May I trust that I can meet this moment just as I am.
Taking a final few breaths here.
As you exhale perhaps letting yourself receive the support beneath you the support within you these strengths and when you're ready returning to the world around you bringing with you whatever small piece of kindness recognition or strength that felt useful through this practice Thanks,
And I'll see you next time.
