This is an affirmation for the hardest days.
For the days when we're terrified or broken,
When our hearts and minds feel splintered and everything is going too fast and too slow.
This is for the days when there are no easy answers,
No drive-through fixes,
When sleep eludes us.
When all we can do is breathe and breathe and breathe.
On these days we might treat ourselves like a small,
Beloved child.
We bathe ourselves in warm water.
We feed ourselves soft,
Buttery toast.
We sip water to replenish the tears.
We soften to ourselves over and over and over.
We listen to the flutters of panic that run through our bodies.
We reach out to the friends who always have the right words or who can sit with us comfortably in the quiet.
We mother ourselves.
I don't know if I can do this,
We whisper,
Cry,
Or scream.
You will be okay no matter what.
A still,
Deep voice whispers back.
We place our hands on our heart,
This heart that knit itself together.
We remind ourselves how beautiful and rare and connected we are.
Maybe we walk in the season's first snow,
Barely seeing the flakes that become white smears all around our cheeks.
Maybe we pray and pray and pray.
Maybe we wait for answers to appear like drifting clouds.
Maybe we find a church or a 12-step meeting or a coffee shop or a yoga class or a podcast.
We look for soft,
Sweet places where we can rest,
Where we can be cradled.
We open ourselves to the smallest flecks of beauty.
We train the muscles of our heart to hold both light and dark.
The only way through is through,
We say.
We walk through the searing pain,
The icy uncertainty,
The dark,
Damp underground.
We might picture for a moment all the other souls who are struggling at this same second.
Through illness and grief,
Through heartache and hunger,
We feel the pulsing pain that connects us all,
A ripe ruby web.
We are not alone,
We whisper.
We remember the other times when we felt like this,
And we remember how over and over again we survived.
We sit with our discomfort,
Our aches,
Our own hollow,
Hallowed loneliness,
And we breathe through this moment and this one and this one.
