Tender Self Compassion Break

The Tender Self-Compassion Break: This is a version of the Self-Compassion Break designed to bring in some tenderness, (some loving, connected, presence) when you are hurting or struggling in some way.

Transcript

This is a version of the self-compassion break designed to bring in some tenderness,

Some loving,

Connected presence when you're hurting or struggling in some way.

So please think of a situation in your life where you are in some need of some care.

Maybe you're feeling inadequate in some way,

Feeling badly about a failure or a mistake you made or something about yourself you don't like.

Or maybe something that's very difficult in your life,

Stressful,

Challenging.

So allow yourself to feel your way into the situation.

What's going on?

What are you feeling?

And also feeling the distress in your body if you can.

So dropping out of your head into your body,

Feeling the discomfort.

And now we're going to bring in the three components of self-compassion,

Starting with mindfulness.

So mindfulness when it comes to tender acceptance is really just about being present with what is.

Being present and validating the pain.

So saying to yourself something like,

This is really hard to feel this or to experience this.

This moment is painful.

It's a moment of suffering.

And also reminding yourself of your humanity.

Feelings like this,

Situations like this,

This is part of being human.

There's nothing wrong with me for feeling this way.

And I'm certainly not the only one.

So allowing yourself to feel your connectedness to others in your own imperfection.

And then finally we want to bring in some kindness.

So one way to do that is with physical touch.

So putting your hands on your heart perhaps or cradling your face with your hands.

Feeling the warmth of your hands.

And saying something kind to yourself which is exactly what you need to hear in this moment.

Maybe it's a message of acceptance.

It's okay to be imperfect.

Or a message of support.

You know I'm here for you.

It'll be okay.

And if you aren't sure what to say you might imagine what you would say to a dear friend in a very similar situation.

What words of care and comforting would you use to help your friend?

And then try saying something similar to yourself.

And now letting the practice go.

Just allowing yourself to be exactly as you are in this moment.

And if you're feeling any distress you can always try grounding your feet in the floor.

Feeling the soles of your feet.

Feeling that.

Feeling that stability.

Reviews

Randomly saw this and enjoyed the simple and kind guidance!

I’m currently reading Kristen Neff’s book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself as a powerful complement to my course on Yoga Therapy. Thank you, Kristin for your transformative teachings.

Thank You. Much needed. Also Thanks for not telling me to breathe. That can be stressful when one is in so much pain.

Short, sweet and powerful 💛
Thank you for sharing your insights

I had only a short time practice, so this is a very helpful practice to help me regroup. The only thing I don’t care for is that it ends abruptly. Otherwise it’s a quick and helpful way to get back to myself.

I'm a huge fan of all of the compassion breaks when times are tough. Thanks for all of them.

Absolutely perfect. Just what I needed. Shows me in 5 minutes something incredibly important that I can easily do for myself, gift to myself.

Helpful quickie for a needed break with not much time.

I didn’t sleep well last night and have an online meeting in an hour. Andi I feel anxious about being tired. I actually felt tears come to my eyes at your reminder that difficult feelings are something we all share. I felt much less alone in this exhaustion! 🙏

So supportive and just what I was looking for—thank you so much!

Thank you, they gave me a lot of comfort and some insight as well

Quick but helpful

These sessions are really helping me to process my feelings. It helps to release the difficult emotions I have been blocking for a long long time. Thank you Kristin 🙏🏼

Exactly what I needed to hear. Especially helpful was thinking about what I would say to help a friend, to learn to become a friend to myself. Thank you.

This was very helpful. I wish the recording didn't end so abruptly though...took me out of it a little.

Very peaceful thank you!!!

Thank you. I woke up feeling guilty in the night for emphasising to myself and others the negative when there was so much that was positive that I was overlooking. I feel better after listening to this. Is is OK to be human.

Just what I needed today. Last night I planned on two drinks, and I had a third. Feeling a bit judgemental towards myself today and this practice really helped change those thoughts and feelings. Definitely sharing this to my Mindful Drinking group here on IT so others may benefit 🙏💗🙏 Thank you Kristin 💗🙏💗

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