
SRS Session 2 | What If It's Not About Me?
by David M Kay
In session 2 we wonder, "Amidst the starring role that each of us plays in the movie of our lives… is there something else that wants to happen here?" This meditation Includes both a guided visualization and affirmation practice. The Spiritual Recalibration Series (SRS) is designed to help you expand your awareness into a new, more open, curious and expansive way of being in daily life. This impactful series comprises 33 sessions, each with a short topic (the recalibration) followed by guided meditation. Meditations include affirmations, visualizations, and brief periods of quiet, musical stillness.
Transcript
Okay,
Welcome back to the Spiritual Recalibration Series.
Thank you for embarking on this series and opening yourself to a new way of being.
My name is David,
And this is Session 2,
What If It's Not About Me?
Find a comfortable seat in a space where you can allow yourself 20 minutes or so,
Undistracted,
To focus just on you.
A quick reminder,
To get the most out of this series,
Please be sure you've listened to the Welcome Session,
Session Zero.
Here we go.
That question was,
What If It's Not About Me?
Which is,
It's a really,
It's kind of a,
It's a brave and humbling question to ask.
Because we are all,
It's been said by so many spiritual teachers,
We are all the stars of our own personal movie drama,
Right?
And that is the,
That's the nature of the ego,
Of the ego mind,
I guess,
Where it's all about me,
And it is and it isn't,
Right?
So I was,
So I guess I want to,
If I can remember,
Or to see if it comes through to speak about this in three different ways.
The first was a little story you,
I think I mentioned previously that I recently bought a new car.
And so that new car,
That this car,
And it's,
It's only about three years old,
I think.
And it's in the second day I got it,
A brake,
The brake light came on,
Like a brake light is out.
So I just got this car in the next day.
So I go through the process of,
You know,
Calling the place where I got it,
And then going to the,
Then ended up going to the dealership,
Because it was supposed to be a warranty work.
So you can imagine if you put yourself in that situation,
Just buy a car,
And then there's instantly something wrong.
And so you kind of get immediately into this,
Oh,
Man.
And then,
So there's lots of people that were involved with getting the car fixed.
So I found myself,
So I was trying to remember this question,
What if it's,
What if it's not about me?
And what my,
What I found that as I asked that question,
Through the different stages of,
You know,
Getting this thing fixed,
Was that I relaxed into the,
Into the process of just interacting with these people,
Trusting them to fix it,
Getting it fixed.
And it's interesting how asking that question can get you even for just brief moments,
Out of your,
Out of our personal drama of this is happening to me,
And this is what I'm going through.
And it was a really specific example.
So I got a statement for a payment on the car I had turned in.
So I had to call the bank,
Just to make sure that that was all taken care of.
And I got on the phone with this woman.
And she asked me how I was and asked me for all my security stuff for my account to go through.
And I asked her how she's doing,
And she said,
I'm okay.
And I noticed that that was just really like this,
I just noticed,
I shouldn't say,
Oh,
You know,
Just it was,
It was a little bit more than that,
Just sort of pleasantry that we all exchange.
So I said,
I said,
Are you okay?
And it turns out that the woman I was speaking to was on,
On like on an island off the coast of the Philippines.
And they're experiencing a typhoon.
And it was like the third,
The third of the third one of these in a short period of time,
And she was afraid.
She was like afraid,
She was there,
She was working,
She was answering the phone,
But she was afraid because of the weather.
So we had a little conversation about that.
And then got in and,
You know,
Got back to the banking thing.
But it's interesting how asking that question,
What if it's not about me,
Just on the base level of human interaction,
Helps in those circumstances,
It helped me to just tune into kind of what,
What her reality was,
What their reality is,
Because we get into this.
And gosh,
Especially in America,
This kind of this customer service sort of thing,
Like what we're entitled to from our like,
Just going to a restaurant,
You know,
In the days where we all freely went to restaurants.
But like,
The person who brings us our food is called our server,
Right?
And so we're there and that person is,
And if the food's not right,
Excuse me.
So we can get very tied,
Tied up in that me drama thing.
And I guess when we ask that question,
What if it's not about me?
It does,
Bit by bit,
I suppose,
Chip away,
Chip away again,
At the ego mind and allowing something,
Something bigger,
Something more,
A bit more space.
There's that question,
You know,
What if there's,
What if there's something else going on here?
What if there's something more going on here?
I know that at least,
At least one or two of you have gotten into that conscious leadership group,
The 15 commitments.
And there are those,
And I think we've spoken about this,
Michael Beckwith's states of consciousness,
The to me state,
That's that victim state of consciousness.
And then the by me,
Where we actually take responsibility for the,
For the things in our lives and take responsibility for our own way of being and move into that creator or that,
That creator role,
That by me role.
And then,
So I think we talked a little bit about those two things,
But then the third one is the through me,
They talk about the through me state of consciousness.
So that question is a curious one.
What wants to happen through me?
That's a,
That's a fun question.
That's an interesting way to come,
To come at the world.
And it does tie in with that question.
What if this isn't about me?
Another question that came up as I was asking this question,
Whenever I remember to,
Over the,
Since last we met was a related question of how can I be of service?
Ask that question in your mind for just a moment and see how that feels.
To me,
It feels open.
It feels like there's space there.
How can I be of service?
So one of the ways,
When I started kind of relating into that question,
I just was playing with just sort of saying yes,
And you know,
You have to watch out for that.
No one's,
No one's suggesting that any of us become a doormat or a servant necessarily to others.
I was just,
When,
When my daughters asked me for something,
I said,
Yes,
This week,
Sure.
Yes.
How can I help?
Which is not,
You know,
In this time,
In this time that we're all going through,
It's so we're definitely spending a lot of individual time and spending more time with small groups of people,
Which really allows you to kind of turn inward and really the stuff does become a lot about the me,
About the little me.
So yes,
I was playing with how can I,
How can I say yes with shuttling my older daughter everywhere she needs to be with her school and her soccer and such,
And the various things that the people in your house and around and around you ask for.
And there are other things on,
There are other things on my,
On my agenda to do,
Right?
So you're seeing how that feels to say yes,
And to be helpful.
Is that it?
I think that's it.
What if it's not about me?
Okay.
Let's do a short practice here.
We'll do a little bit,
Tie in a visualization a bit with this as well,
But let's,
Um,
Okay.
Let's get your feet flat on the ground.
If you're sitting in a chair,
Sit nice and upright,
A nice upright spine,
Check in with your posture,
Draw your shoulder blades together,
Gently place your hands on your thighs.
Yes.
Okay.
Either palms up or palms down.
You choose eyes gently closed or looking off at a point across the way.
If you're more comfortable that way.
And let's go back in to noticing the breath.
Curious about the breath.
Thankful for the breath.
See if you can find the spot in your nostrils where you can feel the breath cool on the inhale,
Warm on the exhale.
Good.
Relaxing the eyes,
Softening them.
Relax your jaw.
Allow your tongue to fall away from the roof of your mouth.
As you notice your mind wander.
Gently,
But firmly choose to bring it back to your breath.
If you notice that you're thinking about something.
Come back to the breath.
Take a deep breath.
Concentrate on the breath.
And now,
Allow your mind to go along with this affirmative statement.
I am a lighthouse.
A bright,
Shining beacon of pure hope and joy.
Effortlessly,
My smile reflects the luminous glow of love.
Now watch what your mind does in response to these words initially.
Is it true?
Is it not?
What does that mean?
All of that little dance that the mind likes to do,
That's okay.
And again,
I am a lighthouse.
A bright,
Shining beacon of pure hope and joy.
Effortlessly,
My smile reflects the luminous glow of love.
I am a lighthouse.
A bright,
Shining beacon of pure hope and joy.
Effortlessly,
My smile reflects the luminous glow of love.
Just a few more times.
As you begin to memorize it,
Allow yourself to say these words along with me.
I am a lighthouse.
A bright,
Shining beacon of pure hope and joy.
Effortlessly,
My smile reflects the luminous glow of love.
I am a lighthouse.
A bright,
Shining beacon of pure hope and joy.
Effortlessly,
My smile reflects the luminous glow of love.
Now you can let go of that statement.
Good.
Now you can let go of that statement.
Allow your gaze behind closed eyes to come to the point between your eyebrows.
Or if your eyes are open,
Just gaze gently up in that direction.
Don't need to watch the breath or say the affirmation.
In your belly,
Notice a glow.
A warm glow,
That knowing that all is well.
A glowing that all is well.
A glow of trust.
Now notice a bit higher in your heart.
Another glow.
Slightly different color.
A shimmering,
If you will.
This glow of love.
And allow the glow from your belly,
The all is well,
The shimmering in your heart,
The love,
To open to the point between your eyebrows,
A shining light,
A beautiful light of joy.
Allow this trust,
This knowing,
This love,
This joy,
This light to exist within you and to emanate from you.
For just a few more moments now,
Allow yourself to be in this light.
Peace.
Joy.
Good.
And now,
Take an intentional inhale through your nose and an exhale through your mouth.
One more in and out through the nose,
A natural breath.
Prepare to come back to the space where you are.
And when you're ready,
You can open your eyes or you are welcome to keep them closed and stay as you are for as long as you like.
