The ache in my heart has been there for as long as I can remember.
My heart felt lonely,
Unworthy of love,
Not good enough,
Unimportant,
And overlooked by my family throughout my childhood.
From adolescence onward,
Following the recipe that seemed to work so well in fairy tales,
I placed high hopes on romantic relationships to fill the void in my heart.
Yet those relationships fell short every time.
I stumbled into one relationship after another,
And not knowing how to build a healthy or lasting connection,
I left each lover in turn,
Staining the ground beneath our feet with broken hearts.
The ache feels like tension,
A painful longing,
A sad wound that stubbornly refuses to heal.
And yet,
It is the fertile ground from which my motivation and creativity spring forth.
It is the place where I lean in tenderly and discover that instead of lacking in love from outside sources,
I am an embodiment of love itself.
I finally realize that I am the love of my life,
Which feels happy and freeing.
I have never been lacking in love,
I only believe that to be true.
With all my heart,
I hope you feel loved,
Too.
I hope you know that you are everything you need.
You are your own remedy.