Zen Mind Workshop

This talk was recorded on 9/28/19 at Aquarius KC, a metaphysical store in Kansas City. I introduced zen meditation, gave some guidance, and took questions. It went really well. Go to https://aquariuskc.com to learn more about this store. I really appreciate that they invited me to give a talk there.

Transcript

Hey,

I'm Daniel,

The host of the Sharpening the Mind podcast.

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This is a talk I recorded at Aquarius,

Kansas City on September 28th,

And the talk is called Zen Mind Workshop.

I sort of explained what we're doing and why we're doing it as far as Zen meditation goes.

And I led some guided meditations and I took questions.

So that's what this is,

And I hope you like it.

Welcome everyone.

I'm glad you're all here.

My name is Daniel and I do meditation things.

So I came up with this.

I was asked to do a workshop here and I came up with this workshop and I could have easily done like a Buddhism 101 or who is the Buddha or something,

And I didn't want to do that.

So I came up with this Zen Mind Workshop and we are going to talk about,

First of all,

We're going to talk about why we are doing meditation practice.

And then we're going to do some different styles of meditation together.

So the more important thing is the practice we're going to do,

Because what this is about is doing something.

It's not so much about learning the right philosophy or the right ways to talk about it,

But it's about doing something.

But I am going to talk about why we do it.

And I'm going to talk about where it comes from as well.

And I'm not going to talk a lot about Buddha except to say Buddha just means the one who is awake.

And I'm going to tell a story that features the Buddha,

But we're not going to go real deep into that because the truth is that this is not about the Buddha's journey or about anyone else's.

It's about yours.

So we could very easily get distracted thinking about the Buddha or any other historical figure and not think about our own journey.

And a lot of people,

I think,

Are prone to that.

So with that being said,

I'm going to tell this story now.

It's called the Flower Story,

And it really encapsulates what we're trying to do,

Or rather,

What we're trying to do and why we're trying to do it.

So the story is that the Buddha was this historical figure that people really liked listening to.

People thought he was really wise,

And they really liked,

They would just follow him around in droves and just wait for him to say something really wise so they could memorize it.

That is what his life was like.

And this one day,

He stood up before a crowd,

Which he did often,

And everybody was really excited.

They were thinking,

What's the Buddha going to tell us today?

Is this going to awaken us?

Is this going to make us feel really good?

So they were really,

There was a lot of anticipation.

And he got up there,

As he had many times before,

And he had given many wise teachings before,

And he didn't say anything.

He just,

The story is,

He just got up and he pulled out a flower,

And he just showed everyone the flower,

And that was it.

And so that's kind of silly,

Right?

So what happened was,

The people were like,

What the fuck is happening?

Why didn't he give a teaching?

And so a lot of them are,

They're all either confused or disappointed or upset because they really thought they were going to get the real teaching or the real encouragement that they wanted.

And just one guy in the crowd,

He smiled.

And that's really the end of the story,

And that is a really silly story if we,

And I have to unpack it for you maybe,

But the guy that smiled,

He was just there and saw a flower.

So everyone else present is thinking about their expectations or thinking about teachings they've gotten before,

Thinking about what they wanted or wished for,

Or feeling extreme disappointment.

And this one guy,

He's just there,

And he just sees what's in front of him,

And that's it.

So he just sees a flower,

It's a pretty flower,

And he smiles.

And everybody else around is like,

This is,

This is crap,

I wanted a good teaching,

And he just,

He just is there with what's happening,

And that's it.

And that is said to be the beginning of the Zen tradition because we're not really like that guy who's just there.

We're not really like him.

Rather,

We are bringing our baggage and our obsessions and our neuroses into every situation,

And that is what we struggle with,

And that is what we want to learn how to do is be here.

We want to learn how to be here and be with what's happening and not bring everything from our past into it.

Not to say we shouldn't learn from the past,

Because of course we should,

But we shouldn't live there.

We should be able to live here when the time is now to live here.

And if you've ever like had a bad day at work and then you go home and you're shitty to your family,

That's because you're carrying baggage.

That's a very minor example of what we're talking about,

But really we're all carrying a lot from the lives we've had,

From how we were raised,

From all the experiences we've had.

And if you've ever also like started a new relationship and you kind of expect it to be like your old relationship,

That's baggage as well.

It's the same kind of thing.

And one more thing I want to say is this is also about learning how to be more genuine.

So as we engage in meditation practices,

We start to be more real,

And because of that,

We start to have a little bit of trouble lying to ourselves.

And maybe if we're not very reflective,

We don't realize how much we lie to ourselves,

But once we start learning how to be more authentic,

We can't deceive ourselves as well as we did before.

So gosh,

What's my example?

My example of that is I kind of have a beer belly here,

And I tell myself that's genetic.

And to an extent it is genetic,

But of course also I'm making life choices.

I'm making life choices,

And that's why I have a beer belly,

Because I'm making life choices.

And we probably have all sorts of things like that.

So that's an example of I've had to learn how to face that and be real with myself and say,

Well,

I'm eating more ice cream because I want to eat more ice cream.

I don't have a reason,

Right?

I'm just doing it because I want to.

So we are confused in our lives a lot of the time,

And our baggage and our neuroses and expectations,

They really pull us around and they really change how we see the world.

I sometimes like to describe it as like those old-timey 3D glasses with the—everybody remembers those,

Right?

Red on one side and blue on the other.

So if you put it down and you're not looking at a 3D movie,

You just see things don't look like they're supposed to.

And that's kind of how I like to think about it sometimes,

That we don't see things as they are.

We see things either through our expectations or through the labels we put on everything all the time.

We are constantly carrying these things around,

And sometimes we misjudge the world around us because of that.

And also,

We're distracted and we have trouble being present in our lives.

So sometimes even when there are things we really want to pay attention to,

We realize we're not doing it.

So a big example of that is if you've ever talked to someone,

You've been in a conversation with someone,

And you really like them and you really want to have a conversation with them,

But you're just in your head.

You're just thinking about what you want to say,

Or worse,

Like not present at all,

And you're not listening to them.

I think we've all had that experience sometimes too.

And I call this the daydream,

Where we're not present and we suffer and our actions aren't really intentional,

We're just doing things.

I call that the daydream.

We're on autopilot and we just react a lot of the time.

And the truth is that it's harder to make good decisions when we're just reacting,

When we're just sleepwalking through life.

And we miss what's happening.

We lose track of a lot of things we want to pay attention to.

I've heard people say that,

Like,

My child was,

It feels like my child was just born and now they're starting college.

And I think of that sort of thing too,

Right?

They're not present and we lose track and life is just passing us by.

So I think about that and then I think about,

So what we're talking about is training our minds so we can learn how to wake up.

This is about empowering ourselves and about clarity as well.

What we're trying to do is see through this daydream to see things as they really are and see things as,

See ourselves as we really are and to learn how to pay attention and to live our lives in a better way.

We suffer because we're in this daydream and we make mistakes and we make bad decisions and we have trouble focusing even when we really want to.

And the truth is that when our attention is fractured and when we don't see things clearly and when we think we're lacking,

Then it's really easy to sell us things.

It's really easy for people to sell us things or sell us ideas and so that's why this is about empowering yourself too.

But also we can kind of have,

We can have suffering that spills out onto the people around us and that's no good.

So we want to turn our minds so we can empower ourselves.

And I'm going to tell another story about,

This is an old Zen story about how our expectations shape the way we experience the world.

This is called the story of Hwang Hyeo and it was this guy in medieval Korea.

He wanted to learn Zen practice and he got this idea that a lot of people have gotten over the years which is,

I need to go to an older place to find the more serious teaching.

So he got this idea that he had to travel to China because Zen came from China to Korea.

So he got this idea in the middle ages,

And it's the middle ages so traveling is really dangerous and he's walking.

And so he's taking this journey that's really dangerous and one night he gets caught in a thunderstorm.

We don't think about that much because we have cars and things but a thunderstorm can kill you if you walk everywhere,

Right?

So he's in this thunderstorm and he finds a cave to go into to rest for the night.

And this is important to the story,

It's completely dark in the cave,

You can't see anything.

And he goes to sleep in there to hide from the thunderstorm.

And middle of the night he wakes up and he's just incredibly thirsty.

I wake up sometimes in the middle of the night really thirsty too,

So I get that.

But he wakes up and he's incredibly thirsty and he doesn't know what he's going to do because it's completely dark.

And he reaches around and he finds this round thing and he thinks,

Oh I found a gourd.

Which when I first read this story I was like,

What?

But that was a thing they did in those days,

You would collect water in a gourd and you would drink it and I guess it would make the water taste good,

I don't know.

So he thinks,

Oh I found a gourd.

So he drinks water from this and he thinks it's the best water he's ever tasted.

It's really cold and very sweet and very delicious.

So he's very happy he found this gourd and he puts it down and he goes back to sleep.

And when he wakes up in the morning there's light in the cave.

And he realizes that it's a crypt.

So there are bones everywhere.

And he looks down and he sees he didn't drink from a gourd,

He drank from a skull with some very unclean water in it.

So immediately he throws up,

But then after that he realizes,

How powerful is my mind?

How powerful is my mind that I could taste what I wanted to taste,

What I wanted and expected to taste,

Rather than what was really there,

Which was unclean water that probably wasn't cold or refreshing,

But his expectation gave him what he wanted.

And we don't think of our minds as very powerful sometimes,

But they are.

The good thing about our minds shaping our reality is we have some power here.

We have some power to change our experience of the world.

And so what we're going to do is we're going to practice calming and stabilizing our minds.

And when we learn to do that,

That also generates wisdom because it's all this noise,

All this baggage that stops us from seeing things as they really are,

From seeing ourselves as we really are and kind of learning about our place in the world.

So sometimes this path is called the gateless gate,

Which seems nonsensical,

But it's because there's nothing stopping us.

There's no barrier and there's really nothing special about it.

It's just learning how to be here.

I sometimes say I'm selling water by the river because it's really just being here and you don't really need me to tell you that,

But I'm going to tell you anyway.

We're really just trying to put down our shits and to learn how to be in the world in a more authentic way.

So we're trying to just bring some clarity and some awareness into our experience and to learn to see through all our baggage and confusion in order to see things as they really are so we can put aside our delusion and turn our minds so we can see the freedom and awakeness that we already have because that's the truth.

We've got all this junk stopping us from seeing it,

But really awareness is what we have already.

And this is what we have already.

And another aspect of this is we also sometimes kind of think about how to be in more harmony with the world.

So there is ethical teaching that goes with Zen as well,

But it's not about sort of be good because I say so.

It's be good because if you have harmony with the world around you,

You're going to have a better time,

An easier time being calm and learning to stabilize the mind.

Whereas if you're out there lying and stealing all the time,

It's going to be a little bit harder to be calm and be in harmony with the world around you.

And that sort of thing kind of tends to distract you.

So when we learn how to focus and when we learn how to be present and be quiet,

Then we're giving really space for our minds to manifest the wisdom that's already there.

So we're trying to see the world as it really is without being so clouded by our judgments and labels also.

These things filter our reality and we rarely have a clear picture of what's happening.

I think about,

And I hesitate to bring this up,

But I think about like if I see somebody wearing an NRA hat,

I immediately have opinions about,

Not opinions,

I have assumptions I'm making about who they are and that is not fair.

That is not fair because if I see somebody in an NRA hat,

I don't know anything about them,

Right?

But I do immediately start to think certain things and then I have to stop myself and that's kind of what we're talking about too.

It especially manifests in the way we judge people and in the way we have expectations for how this person I'm looking at is going to behave.

And it's really a thing that drives us apart as a world,

I think.

So now we're going to talk about doing some practices and then we're going to do those.

So we're going to do a practice called the healing breath that just kind of centers us and gets us ready for the other practices.

And then we're going to do a practice called following the breath,

Which is a practice where we learn how to concentrate and focus on one thing,

Which is going to be our own breathing.

And then after that we're going to do a practice called silent illumination.

Some people really struggle with that one,

But it's one where we just try to be fully present and just notice everything that's happening and not get pulled out of where we are.

So those are the three practices we're going to do.

But first I'm going to talk about how we sit.

And then,

By the way,

After we do those practices,

There will be time if there are any questions or comments,

We can go over those.

So what I want you to do is sit up as straight as you can.

And if you want to cross your legs like me,

You can,

But you don't have to.

If you're going to have your feet on the floor,

You want to have them firmly planted.

And we're going to try to keep your feet in one place the whole time.

And make your back as straight as you can.

If you're slouching at all,

Don't do that.

I've always found that when I start to slouch,

My mind starts to wander and I've lost track of the meditation.

So we sometimes think of mind and body as separate and I want to tell you that they're not.

What your body is doing and what your mind is doing are related.

And so let's see.

Firmly plant your feet,

Sit up straight.

And then the next thing I want to talk about is your hands.

So there are two different things I recommend for what to do with your hands.

The most important thing is that you have a plan for what your hands are doing because if you don't,

That can lead to fidgeting.

So the two things are what I call the bowl,

Which is hand on top of hand,

Thumbs gently touching,

Resting in your lap like this.

Some people call that the cosmic mudra.

I think that's silly to make it sound so fancy.

So I just call it the bowl.

So your thumbs should make kind of an oval and your fingers should be lined up with your other fingers.

That's option number one.

And then the second option is what's called relaxation and that is just hands on your knees,

Hands on your knees.

And I say do whatever works for you.

And then additionally,

What I do is an eyes open practice.

So some people say when you meditate your eyes should be close.

And I don't say that.

The one exception to that is if I am leading an event outside,

Then I say yes,

Close your eyes because there's too much happening outside.

But in an event like this,

I say eyes open and look sort of downward at the floor.

And I don't know if you're able to do that with those chairs in front of you.

So if you're not,

I would say you can also just put your gaze on the chair in front of you.

The point is we're going to find something to look at that's not very interesting,

That's not moving,

That's not going to distract us from what we're doing.

So I'm going to look at the floor right here and that's generally what I like to do.

A lot of people recommend just sitting facing a wall and looking at the wall.

Obviously that's not what we're doing here,

But I think that's a good practice as well.

But the floor is really good.

And if you need to scratch,

A lot of people find that suddenly when they sit down to meditate they suddenly feel incredibly itchy.

That phenomenon is called,

Has a name,

It's called sitting on the anthill.

And it's just that sometimes we play tricks on ourselves to try to resist this,

Right?

And that's just what that is.

But that said,

If you have an itch,

Take a minute,

Scratch it,

And then come back to your position.

Because if we're just thinking about how itchy we are,

Well that's not meditating really,

Right?

So if you have an itch,

I say scratch it.

And if you need to adjust it any time,

I say just adjust.

I know there are some people who are really hardcore and will say,

No,

Don't move at all,

But I'm not one of those.

I say,

If you need to adjust,

Adjust.

Okay,

So I think that's everything.

So we're going to do the practice that's called the healing breath,

And that is a very slow,

Intentional breathing practice where we breathe in,

We inhale for five seconds,

And we hold our breath for five seconds,

And then we exhale for five seconds.

So we're going to do that three times,

And I'm going to show you what it looks like now,

And then I'm going to direct you.

So it looks like this.

That is the healing breath.

So I'm going to direct you,

And then I'm going to do it with you.

So we're going to do this three times.

So each breath is going to take 15 seconds for these three breaths.

So breathe in,

Hold your breath,

Breathe out,

Breathe in,

Hold your breath,

Breathe out,

Breathe out,

Breathe in,

Hold your breath,

Breathe out.

So I really like this practice as a bookend for meditation,

So we'll do it again at the end.

And it's also a practice that I like to recommend for stressful situations.

That is,

If you're stuck in traffic or the kids won't stop yelling or work is really challenging or whatever,

Just take a moment and do the healing breath and it'll help you center yourself.

So I really like that practice.

And now we'll begin the practice called following the breath.

So I want you to bring your attention to the breath coming into and going out of your body.

We can either focus on the nose,

The breath coming into and going out of our noses,

Or the alternate option to that is focusing on the way your belly rises and falls.

For whatever reason,

When I teach kids how to meditate,

They always have an easier time focusing on the belly.

But I think whichever works for you,

If the nose is easy,

Do the nose.

If the belly is easy,

Do the belly.

The point is,

This is something that's happening all the time and we don't pay attention to it because it's happening automatically and we don't think of it as important unless we're having trouble doing it,

Then it suddenly is very important.

So bring your attention to the breath and we're going to do the practice called counting.

So on your next inhale,

I want you to mentally note the number one and on your exhale,

Note the number two.

The reason we're doing this,

The reason this is helpful is it's our anchor and every time something comes in to distract us,

Like a memory or a daydream or thinking about what we're doing later or even hearing a sound and thinking,

What's that?

We can bring our attention back to one on the next in breath.

We want to try to not beat ourselves up,

But rather just go back to one.

The breath is always there to go back to.

In one,

Out two.

In one,

Out two.

And we'll do this practice for a little while and then switch to another practice.

Okay let's do it.

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