The Greatest Wealth: "Contentment"

Wealth is such an allure for most people. "If only I were wealthy, then..." But does wealth necessarily bring us the happiness we are looking for? Is there perhaps a greater wealth than money.

Please note, this is a talk, not a guided meditation.

Transcript

Welcome to the Happiness Podcast.

I'm Dr.

Robert Puff.

Do you ever dream about winning the lotto?

And if you did,

What would you do with all that money?

I mean,

It sounds amazing,

Doesn't it?

To win so much money and to have all our worries and fears be gone.

Here in the US,

The largest winning lotto so far has been $1.

6 billion.

And that was split between three people,

So each of them received over a half a billion dollars.

For most of us on the planet,

That number is just inconceivable.

We just wouldn't even know what to do with it.

And for sure,

It would take all our worries and fears and pains away,

And our lives would be great.

Maybe.

For most of us,

This just seems like too big of a stretch.

We'll probably never get there.

But we may dream about getting into a profession or marrying someone who has a lot of money,

Or getting a lot of money from the work that we do.

I mean,

That's not inconceivable.

We could go to school.

We could do well in school.

We could get a profession like a lawyer or a doctor or a dentist,

And then get a really good job,

Make a lot of money,

And again,

Life would be awesome.

It would be great.

All our worries and fears would be gone,

And everything would just be spectacular.

Maybe.

Or perhaps with time,

As we've lived life,

These goals too seem unattainable.

So what we focus on is working hard,

Making enough money to pay off our bills,

And at some point,

Being able to retire because we have a little bit of a nest egg,

And with that money,

We can begin to travel and explore all over the world.

It would be wonderful.

Maybe.

You're probably wondering,

Why do I keep ending each of these scenarios with a maybe?

I mean,

Isn't wealth really the path towards happiness?

Aren't wealthier people,

Or people that have things,

Better off than I am?

I mean,

After all,

If I had what they had,

My life would be great.

Maybe.

Let me explain.

Having wealth in and of itself is very neutral.

What I mean by that is,

It doesn't make us unhappy.

It doesn't make us happy.

It's just neutral.

It can provide nice thrills.

For example,

If we're flying,

Obviously flying in first class is a lot more comfortable than flying in coach,

Particularly on an international flight.

I mean,

After all,

When we get on the plane and we see those very comfortable seats,

We think,

Wow,

I sure wish I had one of those seats,

And then we go back to economy and realize we're stuck between two people that are bigger than us,

And it's going to be a long flight to wherever we're going.

Or let's say it's a Friday evening and we want to go on a beautiful date with our partner,

But our finances are tight,

So our dinner is at a fast food restaurant.

But we dream about someday being able to go to a five-star restaurant where the food is exquisite,

The service is impeccable,

And the ambiance is just beautiful.

What wealth can provide is wealth can provide comfort right now.

And even some thrills,

For example,

Living on a home overlooking the ocean is probably going to be a lot better for most of us than living in a small apartment in a very busy neighborhood that's very loud and we hear honking throughout the night.

Those are very different experiences.

I've had the opportunity a few times in my life to stay at a place,

A hotel,

That was right on the water so that I could hear the ocean crashing all night long,

And it was exquisite.

It was very nice.

It was a nice thrill.

So again,

Why do I keep saying maybe?

Well,

It doesn't take long to figure out that we all know people that have these things,

Or at least a lot more than we do,

That aren't happy.

They aren't doing well.

They have so much more than we do,

And yet their lives seem miserable.

But mind you,

Not all.

Like I said,

Wealth in and of itself doesn't bring unhappiness.

It just doesn't bring lasting happiness.

But sadly,

What catches us,

We think it well.

We often think,

If I just had more,

All my problems would be gone,

And I would just be so content and happy.

And yet,

As we get older,

Sometimes we go through parts of our lives where things are a lot better financially.

And yet,

If we're truly honest,

We'll realize that in and of itself,

It doesn't make us more happy.

I mean,

For many of us,

When we were a youth,

We had nothing.

And yet,

There were many times where there was a lot of joy and happiness in our lives.

And now,

We may have a lot more,

And yet be miserable even with all that excess.

Again,

It doesn't mean we have to be unhappy.

It just means it's irrelevant.

I mean,

We all know people that have so much,

And yet commit suicide,

Turn to drugs,

Do crazy stuff that we think,

Wow,

Why did you do that?

You had everything.

I mean,

Think of people like Michael Jackson,

Or even Elvis,

Beautiful souls who had everything.

And yet,

I do think they struggled with happiness.

And yet,

We all know people,

If we've truly lived long enough,

That have nothing.

They have no wealth,

And yet,

Their lives just seem to go well.

Why is that?

What we have to differentiate is between thrills and contentment.

Thrills go the gamut.

I mean,

Think of a drug addict.

They have lots of thrills when they take their drugs.

Or an extreme sport person,

Not that again that there's anything wrong with this,

But they are willing to put their lives at risk so that they can have that adrenaline high.

Or someone who stays in exquisite places around the world,

And yet drinks themselves into a coma every night because they just aren't happy.

And yet,

On the other end of the spectrum,

People can have very little,

And never have amassed anything,

And yet their lives seem so content,

And so at peace.

Again,

I do want to argue,

Because I think there's a tendency to go the other extreme,

Saying that wealth in and of itself makes us unhappy.

I do not believe that's true.

I've known people that do extremely well financially,

And it doesn't in any way impact their lives.

What I mean by that is they may spend or do things that are very costly,

But they'll also be very happy doing things that cost nothing.

And there really isn't that huge a difference between these two activities.

It's just that when a person has money and they're on vacation,

They really do enjoy themselves.

But when they're home,

Just reading a book or doing their work,

They equally enjoy themselves there.

And what happens is that what our greatest wealth that we can possess isn't actually money.

Our greatest wealth that we can possess is contentment,

Being content wherever we are.

When we learn to cultivate this wealth,

Then we'll find that our lives,

No matter what,

Go well.

So if contentment is the greatest wealth,

How do we get it?

Contentment is a mindset.

You see,

For most of us,

Why we're discontent is because there's always a sense of lack,

Wanting something more,

Wishing things were different.

And because of that,

We're discontent.

We aren't happy with what is.

We're fighting what is,

Even though we may have pockets or thrills that are great.

When we buy a new car,

We may be thrilled for a few days.

When we move into a new house,

It may be awesome for a few weeks.

When we're on vacation,

It may be great until we come back.

So we end up feeling like we're on a rollercoaster,

Up and down,

Up and down.

We feel great right now,

And then we feel not so great later.

And then later we feel in a seed of despair.

We just go up and down,

Up and down the rollercoaster,

Because we're always wanting things to be a certain way.

And when we're not that way,

We get discontent.

It's fighting life.

Contentment is about embracing life and saying,

OK,

I get it.

Now I've retired and I have a little bit of money to travel,

But it may not be what I expected.

And oh,

I discover that I'm beginning to have health problems because I'm older.

That's OK,

Because that is part of life.

And I'm going to enjoy the health that I have.

And when I need to go to the doctor and work on things I need to fix,

I'll just do that.

And though I wish I could have traveled the world,

I'll enjoy the people that I do get to see in my life and those I get to visit and the things close by that I have the resources and time to go explore.

Life becomes a beautiful adventure,

Whether we're just cooking our dinner or whether we're exploring the world.

It just doesn't matter because we're content.

We're not always fighting life.

It's the fighting life that causes us to be discontent.

I don't know,

And you may not either,

Why some people's lives,

When it comes to finances,

Turn out great and others don't.

There are a lot of mysteries to it.

But what I do know is that in either situation,

We can be happy,

We can be content.

Because though life doesn't guarantee us wealth,

It does give us the ability to love what is before us and really enjoy our lives,

Even when there are struggles.

Because we can learn to flow with life.

When we flow with life,

Instead of fighting life,

We'll find that contentment will settle into our hearts and this deep sense of peace will be there.

And so I think to really develop this skill,

It's really working on each and every day saying,

Okay,

I know right now I want to be in a jet and travel to Europe,

But instead I'm going to work on enjoying being home and vacuuming my house and doing the laundry just as much as I enjoy having a beautiful meal in an exquisite cafe in Paris.

They both can be good experiences.

And when we really get that,

We'll begin to see,

Oh,

I don't need the wealth.

I may work towards it.

I may even get it.

I may inherit it.

I may win it in the lotto.

But it's kind of irrelevant.

The relevant is that the greatest wealth I can have is by being content with whatever I have right now.

That's it.

Contentment is truly the greatest wealth.

Why we struggle,

Why we're unhappy,

Is because we're fighting life.

We're wishing it was different or that it would stay the same when we're on that great vacation or we buy that new car or we're walking down the aisle to marry our soulmate.

We want that feeling to last forever.

And because we hang on to things or we wish things were different,

We struggle when instead we say,

Life,

Thank you for today.

I'm going to make this a good day.

I may work towards things to improve life or to make things different,

But my main goal is going to be to enjoy what's before me and truly learn to be content in all situations,

Whether they're spectacular or whether they're mundane.

Because if we're able to truly cultivate this contentment,

This contentment in life,

No matter what,

Even though we do work towards things,

Even though we try to improve our lives,

We still say,

Right now,

If there's nothing I can do,

Then I choose to find contentment with what I have.

And if we cultivate daily,

Hourly,

Moment by moment,

This beautiful gift of contentment,

We will find that the greatest wealth we possess and that wealth is called contentment.

Thank you for joining me on the Happiness Podcast.

Until next time,

Accept what is,

Love what is.

Reviews

A simple message, so clear and precise, a good reminder of what’s important in everyday living. Thank you

Feels peaceful and contented after listening to this. Thank you Dr Puff!

Thank you 🙏🏾😊

Very beautiful talk. It's true that we never know where actual contentment lies. We are always on the run to achieve goals which we think will in turn provide contentment. But only when we reach the end point of those aspirations do we realise that there is still something which is amiss. Contentment cannot be achieved, it is rather a state of mind that "happens" when we live without struggle of mind, body and soul. Just living every moment with equal joy and awareness will bring contentment to us everyday!

Thankyou for sharing this beautiful message.

Wise words on contentment and very well explained.
Thank you.

I really enjoyed your talk. A great reminder to to see the pleasure in the moment. There are so many things to be grateful for throughout the day. I just need to call them to my attention and relax into my wealth.

This is truly something I want to work towards 🌺🙏🌸 thank you for sharing. There is so much truth in what you are saying

I really needed to hear this today. I was thinking my way into a deep dark pit, hating my job, the state of my relationship, feeling worthless because of my mistakes and struggling with the challenges and hardships in my life. Oh and not to mention the anxiety caused by it all that had me feeling like I was suffocating. I was resisting the present moment because I didn’t like it and I could feel that resistance in every fiber of my being but in hearing your words I let go. Thank you for giving me perspective, perspective that I had but needed reinforced and you did it in such an effective way. I am grateful 🙂

Simple truth! Thank you 🙏🦋

An important lesson for all. Thank you!

So Beautiful !!

Thanks, Dr Puff. This reminded me of my favorite quote by Lao Tzu: Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you. 😍❤️🙏🏼

Simply beautiful and a wonderful reminder for all of us. Thank You, this made my day!

Thank you; I loved this!!!!! What a great reminder for us all!!

Thank you. This is just what I needed to hear this morning.
Smiling now🙏💜🦋

Thank you for this salient reminder of one of life's greatest truths.

Such wonderful advice. Thank you so much for sharing.

Yes! A new Dr Puff. As always you never disappoint. Thank you Doctor.