The Acceptance Breath

This practice uses the breath to accept, make space for and allow a difficult experience and to simultaneously offer ourselves kindness, care and self-compassion. It was developed from a Tonglen practice of breathing in our suffering and distress, whilst sending outwards a sense of care and love with the outbreath.

Transcript

The acceptance breath. Begin by allowing yourself to sit comfortably. Feeling the weight of gravity. Your seat on the chair, Your feet on the ground. Let go of any tension in your shoulders, Neck or jaw. Sit in an alert but easy posture. Allow your eyes to gently close or rest your gaze downwards towards the ground and bring your attention to the natural rhythm of your breathing. Let go of any tension in your shoulders. Bring your attention to wherever you feel each breath as it comes in and out of the body. Perhaps you'll feel the breath at the tip of your nose. You may sense your chest rising and falling or you may be aware of your belly expanding and contracting. Just follow the physical sensations of each breath as it comes in and out of your body. Now just noticing are there any difficult or uncomfortable thoughts or feelings within your body or mind? And beginning by giving this experience a name. Perhaps it's a feeling or an emotion. Is there sadness, Fear, Anger, Grief, Hurt or shame? Breathing in and allowing the feeling to be present. Maybe it's a painful thought, A difficult memory, A fear about the future, An image, A sense of blame or judgment about ourselves or others. Breathing in and allowing the thought to be there. Perhaps there's some discomfort or pain in the body, Tightness, An ache, A sense of burning. As we breathe in we allow it to be just as it is. And noticing whatever this difficult experience is, Our natural tendency to try and push it away. We might try to ignore or resist, Avoid, To somehow stop it from causing our discomfort. And however painful, This inner experience is still a part of us. So to stop the battle I'm going to invite you to simply allow this experience to arise. Just allow it to be present. Breathing in and letting be. Breathing in and allowing ourselves to expand, To make space for this difficult experience within. Remembering that we are able to hold it safely within us. Imagining for a moment that the difficult experience is like a small child or a tiny kitten who's got lost in the darkness and who comes home dirty, Tired, Cold and distressed. In need of being welcomed home, Of being held, Warmed, Loved and cared for. Breathing in and allowing yourself to open your eyes. And we can use our breath to approach our difficult inner experiences with that same sense of care. We breathe the painful or scary thoughts and feelings in, Into the large space we hold within, Without resistance. Allowing the thoughts, Feelings and memories to be integrated into your mind and into you as a spacious whole person. Holding them inside with kindness and care. We breathe in the sense of negativity, The difficult feelings, The resistance. You might imagine these as a dark cloud, A physical presence, Something abstract, Just now letting go of the specifics of the story and just having a simple sense of darkness. We breathe this inwards into our sense of space and now we can add in the outbreath which offers the antidote to the negative experience. So for fear we might breathe out a sense of safety or strength. For distress there may be sense of ease, Of comfort, Of being able to bear this. For hurt there may be kindness, Compassion or love. For isolation there may be a sense of connection, Just asking yourself what does the hurting or scared part need most to offer a sense of care. Maybe bringing to mind a memory of a time that you felt safe or loved or happy. Maybe there's an image, A loving face, Kind eyes, A safe place, The feeling in your body of being held and hugged and we breathe out this sense of peace, Of love, Of care. We breathe out a sense of light that bathes us and the world with whatever is needed. And now we take alternate breaths, Breathing in the difficulty, The distress, The discomfort, The dark, Breathing out strength, Peacefulness, Kindness. Breathing in painful or distressing feelings without resistance, Breathing out care, Connectedness, Safety, Breathing in and breathing out. Breathing in we allow it to be, We accept. Breathing out we offer care and kindness. You might wish to picture it as dark and light, Breathing in darkness, Breathing out light, Breathing in painful thoughts or feelings or sensations in the body and breathing out love, Breathing out a brilliant light radiating in every direction. Breathing darkness, Breathe out compassion, In and out, Darkness and light, Breathing in and out, Breathing in and out, Accepting this moment and all parts of ourselves just as we are, Offering ourselves care and compassion through whatever difficulty we're facing. Thank you.

Reviews

Great - supportive and profound

Full hearted acceptance, beautiful! A practice I will return to over and over again.

I find that spaciousness can be dark or light, and often change from one to another, both peaceful and flowing.

Thank you so much for this beautiful meditation, helping me to acknowledge darkness and giving it gentle spaciousness. 🙏

Loooooooove! Learn how to sit with the challenging emotions, face them, and easily let them go. A lifesaver for this escape artist.