Get yourself as comfortable as you can allowing your body to settle into the bed in any way that feels most natural tonight.
And when you are ready.
You can let your eyes close and begin to notice the feeling of being supported beneath you.
There is nothing you need to achieve here.
Nothing you need to force.
And certainly no requirement.
For you to make yourself fall asleep Because tonight is not something you can command into happening simply.
By wanting it badly enough.
In fact,
For these next few moments.
I'd like you to take the pressure of sleep away completely.
You don't need to sleep.
You don't need to stop thinking.
You don't even need to feel particularly relaxed yet.
You can simply lie here.
Exactly as you are.
And allow this little piece of the night to ask nothing from you at all.
Perhaps you have come to bed.
Already wondering what kind of night this is going to be.
And maybe there is a part of you.
That has been thinking about it.
For hours.
Before you even got here Perhaps last night was difficult.
Or the night before that.
Or perhaps sleep.
Has become something you've started to approach.
With a little apprehension.
Because you know how it feels to wake in the darkness.
And realize that your mind is suddenly wide awake.
While the rest do the world.
Seems to be sleeping.
Maybe you know the feeling of.
Looking at the clock.
And calculating how many hours are left.
Are wondering how tired you will be tomorrow.
How you will get through work.
Or parenting.
Or appointments.
Or conversations.
Or all the ordinary things that can suddenly feel enormous when you imagine facing them without enough sleep.
And perhaps because you are so desperate.
Not to have another broken night.
Part of your mind has decided.
That it needs to stay alert.
Almost as though watching sleep closely enough.
Might somehow help it happen.
When of course the strange thing about sleep.
Is that the more closely we watch it.
The harder it can become.
To notice ourselves naturally moving towards it.
So tonight,
You don't need to watch it.
You don't need to check whether your body feels sleepy enough yet or wonder whether your breathing has slowed enough.
Or question whether this is working.
Because there is no test.
Taking place here.
Perhaps you can simply become curious instead.
About some very ordinary sensations.
Noticing without needing to change them.
Where the one hand feels slightly warmer than the other.
Whether the weight of your head feels heavier against the pillow.
Or whether the pillow somehow feels heavier.
Beneath your head.
By their shoulders.
Seem to be carrying more tension than your hips.
Or whether somewhere else entirely.
Has already begun.
To soften before you even thought of it to notice it.
You don't need to decide which part of you is relaxing first.
And perhaps there is no first part at all.
Because sometimes relaxation arrives in such small ways.
That we only realize afterwards.
That something has already changed.
And if thoughts continue to appear That is perfectly alright too.
Because a quiet mind does not have to mean an empty mind.
Your mind has been thinking all day.
Organizing.
Remembering.
Anticipating.
Solving.
Protecting,
Planning noticing and perhaps it does not know yet.
That it is allowed to stop.
Working quite so hard So rather than trying to clear your thoughts away,
Perhaps you can let them become.
A little less important.
One thought can come.
And then another.
And perhaps the first one is already fading.
By the time you notice the second.
Or maybe one thought stays for a while.
And you do not need.
To do anything with it.
You don't need to finish every thought your mind begins.
You don't have to follow every question to an answer.
You don't need to know what tomorrow will feel like.
From here.
Because tomorrow doesn't need to be lived.
From this bed.
In the dark.
Before it's even arrived There may be something strangely tiring.
About trying to prepare yourself for tiredness.
And perhaps that is part of what's been happening.
You may have found yourself thinking ahead.
To the possibility of waking later imagining how frustrating it will be.
Rehearsing the moment before it has happened.
Almost staying awake now because you are afraid you might be awake again later.
But you don't need to do that tonight.
You don't need to stay awake now.
In preparation for being awake later.
If you wake in the night than that version of you.
Commit that moment when it comes.
Right now,
This version of you only has to meet this moment.
And you are here.
Lying down.
Eyes closed.
Supported beneath you and nothing about the rest of the night.
Needs to be decided yet.
Perhaps you can allow tomorrow.
To move a little further away.
Not because tomorrow doesn't matter.
But because it doesn't belong here yet.
Whatever needs to be done.
Can be done in daylight.
Whatever needs thinking about can be thought about.
At another time.
Whatever conversations need having.
Whatever problems need solving.
Whatever tasks need remembering.
None of it is improved by carrying it through the night.
Beside you.
Maybe you can imagine placing tomorrow somewhere just outside this room.
Or throwing it away.
Not ignoring it.
Simply setting it down in a safe place.
Where it can wait for you You can pick it up again when you're ready.
There is no need to hold it while you rest.
And perhaps that is all you are doing tonight.
Resting.
You don't need to turn rest into sleep.
Because the moment you start trying to make rest become something else it becomes another job.
So let this simply be rest.
May our body lie here.
Their eyes stay closed let the muscles around your face soften as much or as little as they want to.
Perhaps your jaw loosens slightly.
Or maybe it doesn't.
Perhaps your tongue rests differently in your mouth or Maybe it doesn't.
Perhaps your shoulders settle further down into the mattress or.
.
.
Maybe they don't.
Maybe your legs begin to feel heavier.
You don't need to notice all of it.
You don't need to follow any of my words.
You don't need to pay close attention to every word I'm saying.
Because there is nothing here that you need to remember.
Or get right.
And as you lie here,
Perhaps you can begin to imagine.
The night sky.
Somewhere behind your closed eyes.
Not needing to see it clearly.
Not even deciding to notice.
Whether you are imagining it properly.
Perhaps it is deep.
Navy blue or perhaps almost black.
Maybe the colours seem to shift very slightly.
The longer you notice them Or maybe they stay exactly the same.
There might be hundreds of stars.
Scattered across the darkness.
Are only a few that stand out.
Or perhaps when you try to focus on one particular star.
It seems to fade from view.
Only to become clearer again when your attention moves somewhere else.
Maybe another star appears brighter at the edge of your awareness.
And when you look towards that one.
The first star seems to return.
And perhaps you cannot quite tell.
Whether the stars are moving.
Or your attention is moving.
Or whether nothing is moving at all.
But there is no need to work that out.
You don't need to know whether you are looking up at the sky.
Or somehow floating within it.
And perhaps even that question can become too unimportant.
To bother answering.
You may notice the stars themselves or perhaps the space between them begins to seem more noticeable.
And maybe the darkness feels enormous.
Or stranger close.
Or neither of those things You don't need to hold on to any particular image.
Because it can change as soon as it wants to.
A colour can deepen.
And then soften.
A star can appear and disappear.
Then disappear.
The whole sky can become clearer for a moment.
And then blur again.
And each time something changes.
You don't need to know exactly when it changed.
And perhaps your thoughts can begin to behave in the same way.
Appearing for a moment.
And then becoming less distinct.
When you start trying to hold onto them.
A thought about tomorrow may come into view.
And then fade when your attention moves somewhere else.
Just like the stars.
A worry about sleep may appear briefly.
For a second.
And then soften again.
When you don't follow it.
You don't have to push anything away.
Because sometimes the things we push against become the very things we notice the most.
So you can let each thought be there just as a star.
Can be there.
Without needing to reach for it.
Or analyse it.
Or keep it in sight.
Maybe there will still be a part of you wondering whether sleep will come.
And that part can wonder.
If it wants to.
It doesn't need an answer.
Sleep may come soon.
Or perhaps it may take a little longer.
And either way,
There is no emergency here.
Your body already knows how to move naturally towards sleep.
Without you needing to monitor when it happens.
You have fallen asleep thousands of times in your life.
Without knowing the exact reason.
Second.
That waking became sleeping.
And you don't need to know that.
Tonight either.
In fact,
There is no way to monitor that moment.
And fully let go at the same time.
So perhaps you can allow yourself the strange freedom of not checking anymore.
You don't need to ask yourself whether you are nearly asleep.
You don't need to wonder.
Whether your body feels heavy enough.
You don't need to count.
How long you have been lying here for?
And if at some point later tonight.
You do happen to wait.
Then waking does not mean the whole night is ruined.
It does not mean tomorrow is ruined.
It does not mean anything has gone wrong.
It simply means you woke for a while.
As you sometimes do.
And if that moment that comes You can meet it then.
But right now.
It's not here so perhaps you can let the night become smaller again No longer the whole stretch of hours ahead.
No longer something you have to successfully get through.
But simply this moment.
And then this one.
And then whichever moment follows without you needing to notice where one ends and another.
Begins.
You can let the bed keep holding you You can let your breathing find its own rhythm.
You can let the sky behind your eyes continue changing.
Or not changing.
Stars appearing or disappearing.
Or becoming too soft.
To follow anymore And if you lose track of the sky completely,
That's fine.
If a thought comes back,
Let it come back.
And if it leaves Let it leave.
There is nothing you need.
To hold in place a thing you need to complete.
The things you need to get right.
Before you are allowed to rest Tonight does not need to be perfect.
You do not need to sleep perfectly you don't need to know what the rest of the night will bring You can simply let yourself be here.
Supported.
Quiet.
And no longer responsible.
For making sleep happen.
And perhaps without needing to notice when.
The night can carry you.
The rest of the way.
While everything around you continues.
Without asking anything from you at all.
You don't need to keep watch over the hours.
Or keep watch over your sleep.
I'll keep watch over tomorrow.
You don't need to make anything happen from here.
You can simply allow yourself to be held within this moment held within the quiet.
Held within the softness of the bed beneath you.
Without needing to know what comes next.
There is nothing you have to prove here.
The things you have to complete before you are allowed to rest and nothing you need.
To get right you can let the night be imperfect You can let your thoughts be imperfect.
You can let sleep come in its own way.
And in its own time.
Because you don't need to chase it.
Anymore.
You can simply be held within this little space but there is no pressure to perform.
No expectation to meet.
And no need to measure.
Whether you are doing this well enough.
Perhaps that is what rest can be tonight.
Not something you force yourself into.
But somewhere you allow yourself to be held.
Held without being asked to change.
Held without being asked to hurry.
Held without needing to know how long you will stay here.
Or whether you will drift into sleep in a moment or much later None of that needs deciding now.
You can just let yourself soften into that feeling.
As though you no longer have to carry the night because for a little while.
A night can carry you.
You don't have to hold tomorrow in your mind you don't have to hold onto every thought You don't have to hold yourself so tightly either.
You can simply be held.
And perhaps little by little.
Even the need to know when sleep is coming can begin to loosen.
Because for now,
There is only this.
This is bad.
It's quiet.
This moment.
And the gentle feeling of being held within it.
With nothing else you need to be.
And nothing else.
You need to do.
Namaste
