Welcome to a hit of hope,
And this one is a bit salty.
Have you ever taken a personality test?
There are all kinds of them out there.
One claims to know how weird you are based on what kind of ice cream you like.
Another can tell you how much of a psychopath you are.
And there's one that says what sandwich you like will determine what kind of Disney Princess you are.
Inhale and exhale.
Do you ever feel a strong pull to take one of these tests?
Many do,
And it might have to do with the fact that you want someone or something like a test to tell you who you are.
Let's put a finer point on it.
You might someone or something to tell you that you are okay.
It's nice,
Easy,
And fun to hear you are cherry,
Dark chocolate,
And almond ice cream,
Which means you are unique and cheeky,
Sweet and a little bit dark.
It's a little less fun when you take a personality quiz and you are confronted with those parts of you that are more troubling and troublesome.
There are tests that can tell you you are suppressing your rage and it's turning into depression.
There are tests that can tell you you like to be a victim to gain sympathy,
Or you have to achieve to have any sense of worth,
Or you have to control everything,
Or you are going to lose your shit.
Where is the test that tells me if I'm an Italian villa or a Hawaiian bungalow?
Whether you acknowledge them or not,
Those darker parts of you are there,
Following you wherever you go,
Like your shadow,
Which is probably why Carl Jung called them our shadow sides.
Something else to consider,
Those parts of yourself that you don't maybe like,
They probably have served you at some level or at some time.
If you didn't get attention in your family,
Maybe the only way you could get the attention you needed was when you were hurt,
Because we all need attention and sometimes we do what we have to in order to get what we need.
Or maybe you always felt like things were out of your control when you were a kid and you never want to feel that way again.
Or maybe you were in a family where you only felt loved if you achieved so by God you were gonna achieve,
Because we all need to be loved.
All of this is to say we should acknowledge and be gentle with ourselves and our shadow sides.
At the same time,
There is the fact that these parts of our personalities,
Even the ones we don't like,
Can become comfortable.
That's annoying to consider,
Isn't it?
So let's inhale and exhale.
Sit.
Notice.
What are your traits,
Your tapes,
Your ways of being that might have served a purpose at one time but might be causing problems for you and your relationships now?
Inhale.
Exhale.
Sit.
Notice.
Ask,
Do you still want those traits to be at play in your life?
Inhale.
Exhale.
And please do not inflict any more harm on your gentle spirit as you consider these parts of yourself.
They are parts of you.
Chances are they are ready and waiting to be acknowledged,
Healed,
So throwing acid on these wounds is not going to help.
Inhale.
Exhale.
If you've made it to the end of this,
I can have a sense of who you are.
You are the kind of person who shows up.
You are the kind of person who is ready to connect to your breath and go in to see what can happen as you meet yourself where you are and move forward mindfully into the person you want to be.
Now,
How about some ice cream?
Inhale.
Exhale.
Namaste.
