Meditation for Recovery 13: Working With Pain

Day 13 is a meditation to work with pain and difficult emotions. In particular we try to distinguish between the raw experience of pain and our mental reactions.

Transcript

Hello,

This is Paramabandhu.

Welcome to Day 13,

Working with Pain and Difficult Emotions.

The Buddha was asked,

What is the difference between how an ordinary person and a wise person responds to pain?

He replied with the analogy of the two darts.

All of us experience pain,

Whether that is physical pain like catching your finger in the door,

Or mental pain such as when someone rejects you.

This is the first dart,

Which we could call primary suffering.

An ordinary person then gets caught up in trying to push away or avoid the pain,

In blaming themselves or others,

Or feeling self-pity.

This has the effect of making matters worse,

The second dart,

Which we can call secondary suffering.

A wise person just has the first dart.

They don't get stuck in avoidance or obsessing about the pain.

Instead,

They mindfully accept it for what it is,

Without making it worse with secondary suffering.

In today's meditation,

We follow the breath as an anchor for the meditation.

Then,

Whenever we notice that we are experiencing bodily pain or difficult emotions,

As best we can,

We try to face the pain just as it is and let go of any stories we are telling ourselves about the pain.

Today's music has been composed by the Alaska Non.

Begin by settling into a comfortable posture,

Bringing your attention onto your breath,

Following your breath as it moves in and out of the body.

Then,

Whenever you notice a painful sensation,

As best you can,

Recognising the difference between the raw primary painful sensations and the responses of aversion towards it.

Music music music music music You You You If the pain is emotional Noticing the difference between the raw emotion and the thoughts about it the stories or narrative we tell ourselves about it As best you can allowing the primary painful sensations to be there Breathing into the sensations You You You You If the pain is mainly emotional there will be physical sensations associated with the emotion Breathing into these bodily sensations with a sense of friendliness and curiosity You as best you can letting go of the stories about the pain and opening to feeling into the raw sensations You You You You If the sensations are very strong Breathing onto the edge of the area where the sensations feel intense If it's helpful saying to yourself It's okay It's already here Let me feel it You You You You You You You You You You You This is Param Abandhu Wishing you a day in which you find the courage and kindness to meet your difficulties with friendliness and curiosity

Reviews

Thanks. Just what I needed. 🙏

This is amazing. I so appreciate the drone to hold space in the background but otherwise long stretches of silence to focus on the sensations. The gentle encouragement to stick with it was just right. Bookmarking and downloading so I have this when I need it. Thank you. 🤗

Thank you! I often try to resist the pain which makes it worse! Shall add this to my tool box! Namaste 🙏

so nice for a grieving heart. at turns made me cry and yet gave hope

After the introduction, there are long periods of ambient music with a few guiding comments to keep you on track. One of my favorites. Deals with both physical and emotional pain.

The concept of the "second arrow" or, as this meditation puts it, the "second dart", is important in my practice and my work with other addicts. I first learned if it at a retreat with Cheri Maples and Doug Haskins, members and teachers in the Snowflower sangha in Madison Wisconsin.

I Love this. Very powerful. Thank you.

Much more difficult to meditate to only ambience,but I appreciate it.

This series of meditation have been very helpful to me. I am grateful. Thank you. I listen to some a daily they are a haven of compassion.

This helps with all kinds of pain thank you.

Very powerful meditation, caring instruction, time to heal ourselves

Very nice meditation to meet my physical and emotional pain with kindness and curiosity. Thank you.