Perfect Week, Day 2: Courage

This episode explores the works of the Inner Critic, the small voice behind most of our decisions. It includes a short introduction and a meditation part in which you will learn how to recognise and face the Inner Critic. You will also learn about the importance of courage in this process.

Transcript

Hello,

I'm Tomek from Synergy Lab,

Sydney.

Welcome to day two of Perfect Week,

Seven part program designed to support your everyday well-being.

In the first episode we focused on increasing your energy level.

Today we gather courage to face the whisper of the inner critic.

The first thought after you wake up often sets the rhythm of the whole day.

Watching sunrise over the mountains,

Morning walk on the beach,

Smell of the fresh roasted coffee,

A perfect start of the day.

What about times when the first thought after you open your eyes is the one of the problem you must solve?

A difficult conversation you need to have or simply that you don't feel like facing the reality today?

If you pay close attention,

You may find behind such thoughts there is small voice,

A whisper that says,

I'm not good enough.

I can't make it.

This doesn't make sense.

Before you realize the landscape becomes more and more bleak.

Thoughts give rise to emotions,

Emotions to feelings and sensations.

Very soon a scenario comes to life full of characters,

Plots and props.

It changes,

Evolves.

You may ask yourself,

Who is the director of this drama?

Most importantly,

Which part of it is true?

Mark Twain once said,

I've lived through some terrible things in my life,

Some of which actually happened.

The inner critic,

Small voice,

Takes many shapes and always comes as a whisper.

From the evolutionary point of view,

The inner critic developed over millennia as a guardian of our survival.

Its job was and still is to discourage us from taking any action that may potentially put us at risk.

Staying in the cave was after all the safest survival tactic.

This worked very well in the past when safety was our major concern.

Now that we survived and evolved as a species,

The priorities have changed.

We developed means to stay safe,

Technology to keep us secure.

Yet in times of stress,

The same ancient voice whispers into your ear to hide,

To wait and do not take actions.

If you are listening to this recording,

There is a big chance that you are not in an immediate danger of losing your life.

On the contrary,

As a species we have an incredible opportunity in this time of history to forget survival and do what we are meant to do,

Thrive.

This is an act of courage and it's easier said than done.

Most likely you had this realization before and it didn't stop the inner critic from coming back.

The inner critic is after all not separate from us.

It is,

However obsolete,

An integral part of our operating system.

Today I invite you to gather your courage.

Turn a gentle gaze towards the voice that whispers to your ear and whisper something back.

It's okay,

I'm safe,

Secure and protected.

My life is not at risk in this moment and your services are no longer required.

It may not work at once,

But with effort and persistence the inner voice will grow quieter and quieter and eventually disappear giving you freedom to make your choices not out of fear but out of love.

Now let us put those words into action and experience how it feels to face the inner critic.

Begin by taking a comfortable position in your chair.

Sitting upright in dignified position,

Your feet resting comfortably on the floor uncrossed,

Your hands in your lap.

Now allow your eyes to close.

And as you're settling down,

Bring to mind the intention behind this practice.

Bring to mind the courage.

Bring to mind that you will develop an inner strength to deal with the inner critic but also with anything,

Any challenge that may come your way.

May your heart in this practice be light.

Approach it with enthusiasm and optimism.

That's a good place to start.

As you're settling down,

Let us take a couple of deeper breaths in,

Hold and out through your mouth.

In through your nose,

Hold and out through your mouth,

Letting go of all the stress,

All the expectations,

Anything that may get in the way of this moment.

And one more time in through your nose,

Hold and out,

Releasing and letting go.

Now bring your attention to your breathing.

Recognize how your breath enters your body through your nose,

Travels to your chest and to your belly and on the way out,

Your belly,

Chest and the nose.

Keep your mouth closed during the period of this practice.

This allow you to control your breath a bit better,

Allowing yourself to feel your breath.

And as you follow your breathing,

You may recognize that there are some parts of your body that you perceive your breathing a bit better.

Perhaps it's the tip of your nose or expansion and contraction of your belly or rise and fall of your chest.

Perhaps you can perceive the breath through the action of your entire body.

Choose one of those and you will use it as the anchor for your attention.

As you tune in into your breathing,

Allow yourself to direct your gaze towards the anchor.

Allow yourself to breathe in and breathe out,

Observing this simple action through the lens of the anchor you have chosen.

And as you continue breathing,

You may find yourself drifting,

Losing connection with your breath.

You may find yourself distracted by a thought or a sensation in your body or a sound.

Whatever that is,

Allow yourself to simply acknowledge this fact and return to your breathing,

Return to observing your breath.

And then,

Next time,

You find yourself distracted.

Catch the moment in which you detect distraction.

And you may notice what is the reaction of your body when you return your gaze towards the natural sense of your breathing.

The objective for this practice is to recognize what is the quality of this return.

How do you feel about the fact that you lost your focus?

Perhaps you can detect a slight agitation.

Perhaps you may observe tensing of some of the muscles in your body.

Whichever reaction you perceive,

This is the action of the inner critic.

That's the part of you that is unhappy about losing control.

Detection is a practice of 1000 returns.

It is not important for how long you may keep focus on your breath,

But how gentle you return every time you're being distracted.

So as you keep breathing and keep being distracted,

Allow yourself to turn a gentle gaze towards that moment of return with all the gentleness.

Pay attention to this moment when you return with a soft and gentle gaze.

Listen to the action of your breathing.

Working with inner critic is like training a puppy.

The puppy runs away all the time and every time a little puppy runs away you bring him back and ask him to stay.

And the puppy runs away again and you bring him back.

With all the love and gentleness you say stay.

There's no need to get upset with the puppy or beat the puppy because it's his nature to run away.

If you give him enough patience and attention it will eventually learn.

So again,

As you breathe in and breathe out,

Allow yourself not to control and not to judge,

But simply acknowledge every time you find yourself distracted.

With all the gentleness you can master,

Return over and over to the practice of your breathing.

And as the time goes on you may find yourself in periods of less distraction.

And the more gentle you are,

The easier it is to return.

And over time the return becomes effortless as the voice of the inner critic gets quieter and quieter.

Less judgment,

Less tension.

You may use the same technique to work with anything that happens in your life.

Every time that you lose control.

Every time that things may not go your way.

Remind yourself this is just one of many returns you have to make.

And without judgment,

Return to the task at hand.

And pat yourself on the shoulder that perhaps for the first time you noticed the work of the inner critic.

And you made your first step towards letting him go.

You may continue this exercise for a couple of minutes.

Paying close attention to those small moments when you find yourself distracted.

And also gently return to your breath.

To conclude this session,

Bring yourself gently back to the place where you are.

Realise your feet resting on the floor and your hands and your whole body.

As you slowly return,

Ground yourself and centre.

As all the external senses start coming back,

You may slowly wiggle your toes,

Move your fingers.

Also slowly move your head a bit to the left,

A bit to the right.

And when you are ready,

In your own time,

You may open your eyes.

And this is the end of this session.

I'm Tomek from Synergy Lab,

Sydney.

Thank you very much for joining me for this session.

I look forward to meet you again in session 3 of the Perfect Week.

For now,

I bid you a wonderful day and thank you for listening.

Reviews

Wonderful. I wish there was a folder with the whole program because thos is an extract. Thank you Tomek

This is a wonderful way of helping quiet the inner critic. I will try to use it in my everyday life.

Excellent day 2 on the perfect week. I'm getting even more out of the sessions than the first time I did them a year ago!

I liked the guidance for finding the inner critic by more subtle means than usual… Not just looking for a voice saying negative things in my head, but realizing that it is also the slight agitation of suddenly realizing that I’m thinking about something else (what, AGAIN?!? 😆). And instead of feeling like I’m no damn good at this, and never will be, I can instead work on loving myself in my human-ness… and return my focus to the breathing.
The slow and thoughtful pacing and gentle voice are helpful too, as is the puppy 🐶 analogy. Thanks, Tomek! 😘

I return to this weekly practice again and again. So helpful to get me back on track.

Very good basic guidance, Tomek. I’m exploring your IT offerings today, checking out the Perfect Week programs, rather than just jumping around among the many tracks, as is so tempting on Insight Timer.
I’ve been practicing for 14 years, and am considering trying out as a teacher on IT. I’m exploring the offerings of my favorite IT teachers to try to formulate an approach.
Thanks for your orderly and accessible content structure!
Donna

Powerful meditation.. much respect.. 🙌🏼 after practicing your guidance on taking charge of “our inner critic”.. It felt much easier for me to ground ‘myself,’ this am… your calming voice and direction.. got me (outta my head and back into my heart) 🤍

Thank you 🙏

Wow, no words to describe… moved to tears. Dank u 🙏

A beautiful meditation and a wonderful lesson . 💕🙏

Thank you for your soft, kind, gentle guidance along the path toward courage and self compassion. 🙏🏼🦋

Thank you Tomek. Your meditations are always helpful.

This is exactly What i needed. I will come back to it for sure! Thanks

Perfect for what I needed support on this morning. 🙏🏻 Thank you!

Thank you for your lesson on courage. Well spoken meditation 💗💗. Always a treasure to have your guidance. 🙏

Very helpful. My morning wake-up inner voice is strong & negative. I can greet it now with gentleness. Like just telling it, "There, there" hush and come back.

Simply perfect! I can’t thank you enough! It was so simple to return to the breath while you held the space but now I have to learn to quiten my inner critic with patience and intention when I’m on my own ! I am deeply grateful to you Tomek🙏

Thanks Tomek, day 2 of my perfect week is progressing exceptionally well
Namaste 🙏🏼

Awesome meditation! Thank you for your help in managing my inner critic.

This course is amazing. Every one in a while, I come back to it. Thank you Tomeck. Namaste

Perfect for today. Thanks for posting