Embracing Ego

Deepen your awareness, compassion, and connection with yourself in this exploration of what "ego" is. Do you wish to get rid of "your" ego? Are you meditating and doing good in the world trying to be free from ego? What if the key to feeling free from the bonds of ego is not in annihilation, but rather the embracing of it? Let us come together to expand the mind and open the heart.
This is a recording of a live session. The sound quality is lower than normal.

Transcript

My beloved teacher Sai Ma shared this recording and one of the main things that Ma was sharing in the message is how in the path of the spiritual awakening pain comes with it and it is that blossoming of our awakening.

The pain is part of that blossoming of the awakening.

It was a comforting message to receive and many of you are very familiar with this teaching.

This teaching that says that it is through the depths of the suffering that we awaken from this slumber,

This illusion that we are separate,

This illusion that we are alone,

This illusion that we are unloved or unworthy.

That the throws of suffering are what,

You know,

There are so many ways we can look at it but in one way you could say the throws of suffering are what move us toward the awakening process or into it or the experience of it because we just can't be with things the way they've been any longer.

Something has to change or maybe it's just that cracking,

You know,

Like that beautiful roomy quote.

I think it's the wound is where the light enters and I wonder how many of you have had this same experience where there's something profound that happens when we allow ourselves to feel the depth of pain arising.

It's like the heart cracks open and rather than feeling broken there is a feeling of fullness and the perception of life completely shifts.

Maybe we're all of a sudden able to see the beauty in the world or feel the tenderness of our heart rather than just the pain.

There are so many different experiences we can have inside of that.

So first let's look at the way many of us think of ego.

Go ahead and share in the chat and you know the chat kind of moves quickly even though there's a delay so maybe just share like in a few words or maybe one sentence.

Share you know when you think of ego what is the ego?

Just go ahead and share for me.

Hi everyone.

Hi Vanessa.

Oh Sib,

I like your new name.

That's great.

Beautiful.

All right so what is ego?

Sib shares ego makes me think of nausea.

Brittany shares protection.

Laura shares personality.

Vanessa shares I taking things personally over focusing on time.

Jason shares I'm better than.

Annika shares ego is what I want rather than what I need.

Thank you friends.

Thanks for sharing all these different perspectives.

That's great.

And when you think about ego is the ego something good or bad?

Is the ego something good or bad?

Both good both.

Salty is sharing that the ego is the devil based on A Course in Miracles.

Neutral mixed feelings not good not bad but for spirituality bad apparently.

I love this.

Thanks friends.

There's there's you know this is this is a if you're new to our space here this is a non-judgment.

This is a well let's actually let this is good.

I was going to say this is a judgment free zone but that's not true because aren't we all judging all of the time?

Even if you really love someone in this group who we meet with regularly does that mean that your mind just stops judging?

No but what we can say is there is an intention here of creating a collective safe space where we can take ownership of our judgments and allow each other to be as we are.

You see the difference there?

One is kind of this lofty idea that it's a judgment free zone when it's not.

We're all judging all of the time and the other is authenticity.

Ah yes judgments are still arising and yet I am holding the intention I am holding the intention of creating a safe space for each of us to be as we are.

You guys are so cute.

Yep Jason shared an addiction recovery I'm taught to get rid of ego.

Okay great thanks friends thanks for continuing to share while I was speaking there for a moment here.

All right great so hey Jason so did I did I ask the question I said oh yeah we said what is it and is it good or bad?

I think those are the only questions I'm going to ask.

Okay great.

So this is great so what I was going to say is that I was saying thank you all for sharing.

This is a safe space to share.

None of us know all of the answers and it's wonderful when we bring all of our different perspectives we're not sitting here saying one is right one is wrong.

I'm personally never saying you need to agree with me or believe what I say so this is definitely an all-inclusive space so thank you all for sharing because it's great to be able to learn from each other and open our minds with different perspectives.

So I'll share a little bit on what my perspective of the ego is.

But first I will answer the second question.

The question was is the ego good or bad?

And I would also say it is neither good nor bad.

We often yeah I'll kind of break down a few different perspectives here.

So one common way that we hear about the ego see that beautiful picture my beloved.

One way that we often hear about the ego is through this lens of egoism or arrogance right to you think of oh that person is egotistical.

That person is full of themselves.

I think Jason you said earlier like feeling better than somebody else.

There's that air of arrogance or better than or just this sense of having to really like I'm the best like that air of I'm the best.

So this is one way many of us think about ego and for many of us this is kind of our introduction to this idea of ego.

This idea is you know we're young and we hear oh that person is so egotistical.

And then of course there's the more psychological or psychology based understanding of the ego that was originally introduced by Freud.

And this is this understanding that looks at this term ego is kind of the functioning of the mind.

So rather than it being maybe an entity of sorts or part of who we are it's how we can understand the mind in short.

It's a much bigger body of work there.

And then we can take it further what you might call the spiritual ego.

And this is this functionality.

It's a functionality.

Let's just pause there for a moment here.

The way that I have learned of ego is that the ego is like the personality.

It's not like oh the ego is this bad thing over here and my personality is over here.

The ego is actually the functioning of the personality.

Often we also look at the ego when it comes to spirituality as keeping us in the illusion of separation.

Comes back to what many of you shared in that chat.

I me my.

I am separate.

I need to take care of myself.

I don't mean it like that because we do need to take care of ourselves.

But you know some sense of I have to separate myself from others.

I'm different.

I'm better.

Separation.

I could go on and on there.

This idea of separation.

So part of that egoic functioning is keeping us in separation.

And the ego in this spiritual context is usually related to fear.

Yes,

And for anyone who's familiar with this concept of the ego,

You know what I'm speaking about.

This fear-based way of functioning.

Now there's something pretty,

I don't know,

I like how concise this understanding of the ego is.

They can all be put together.

We can keep them separate and say this is what I resonate with most.

Or we can kind of combine them all and say I can see how all of these different definitions of ego fit together.

But as many of you are aware,

You've heard me speak or others speak on this before,

There's so much information happening around us all of the time.

So much stimuli that our brains are only able to process a very,

Very small amount.

In terms of numbers,

There are about 2 million,

Just think about these numbers,

2 million bits of information occurring all at once in any given moment.

2 million bits.

Does anyone know approximately how many of those 2 million bits our conscious minds can process?

Anyone know the general answer here,

If not the exact one?

Someone sharing 50?

Any other ideas here?

So 2 million bits of information and our brains can only process,

Okay,

No one else is,

Okay,

120.

Okay,

Thanks friends.

Why not?

Let's just play the numbers game here.

Out of 2 million bits of information,

All of this stimuli,

Colors,

Sounds,

Temperature,

Texture,

Light,

All of these things happening.

2 million bits,

Our brains consciously process 134 bits of information.

I mean,

Think about that.

Think about how much we don't even realize is there.

Think about how much we don't see.

Think about how much is happening right here,

Right now that we literally can't see because our brains are not processing it.

It's just too much information.

I'm getting off on a little brain tangent here,

But this is just such fascinating stuff to me.

You know,

It's like,

I mean,

Think about how many things are occurring right now that because they are foreign to our minds and our brains,

Our brains literally look over it.

Like you could have an ancestor right here or a spirit guide right here or something even very tangible right here.

And if your brain doesn't have a reference for it,

You won't see it.

It's just amazing,

These brains and this whole experience.

So the reason I'm bringing up the amount of information that our brains process is because this is another definition of the ego,

That the ego is what helps us to process the information.

The ego is what,

Rather than if we think about it in this way,

We are these infinite beings.

We are infinite.

We are unlimited,

Unbounded energy,

Having a very finite experience,

Having a very controlled,

Small experience of the infinite.

And so for our brains to function and for our personalities to function with all of this stimuli,

We actually need something to act as a filter.

So another definition of the ego is that the ego is also a way for us to process the stimuli of life.

And I kind of already said it,

But to just kind of say it very concisely,

Imagine that you are one with the infinite.

Like just close your eyes for a moment and imagine the cosmos.

Imagine that you're in space and you are looking at the vastness of space,

This infinite space in the cosmos.

It goes on and on and on and on.

And then imagine that that is who you are.

You are not the stars that you see.

You are not the planets.

You are the infinite nature of the cosmos.

So to have this very finite experience,

The ego functions as a way to process the infinite stimuli into this individuated consciousness.

Rather than being aware that we are one with all of creation,

We have an experience of individuality.

And so the ego's purpose here is to filter so we can process information and also to uphold this illusion of individuality.

And we could go into the philosophy of why we do this and why we take birth and why we incarnate and we can get into all of that.

But let's just look at this as a sense of the ego is serving this purpose of having an individual identity when we are actually one with all of creation.

I'm just now seeing Jason's comment that my ego processes 135.

I got you baby,

I got you.

I'm sure the ego is still on here.

That was perfect.

So hi Monica.

So let's see here.

So yeah,

Any questions you have,

Any thoughts you have,

We're going to keep exploring this together.

Hi Mohammed.

So let's see here.

Jenny is saying,

Is that the same as boundaries?

Well usually when we think of boundaries,

We think of decisions that we have made to take care of ourselves.

But please,

Unless you're speaking to physical boundaries,

Please feel free to clarify what your question is if I'm not getting it.

When I'm hearing you ask that question,

I'm hearing you ask this in terms of personal boundaries,

In which case I would say that yeah,

We could definitely see that as a function of the ego.

But let's look at it more all inclusively and that is that all of these different characteristics,

All of these different behaviors,

Whether they seem destructive or supportive or whatever,

That all of the personality,

Not just the bad parts of the personality,

Not just the fear or the anger,

The happiness and the pleasure and the kindness,

All of these things could also be summed up in the experience of the ego at times.

Now we can get into the duality conversation here,

Which whenever we're speaking of the ego,

We are speaking dualistically.

Yes,

Because if there isn't duality,

Then there's only oneness.

If there's only oneness,

Then there isn't an ego.

There's just one.

So whenever we're speaking of ego and as long as we're in these bodies having these experiences,

We're in this dual natured experience.

Brittany is saying,

If the ego can only process so much and then it creates an identity.

Does that,

I'm just going to go back here and see if I,

I didn't hear a question in that love.

I just heard a statement,

But maybe that's also what you're saying in terms of boundaries.

Again,

Forgive me if I'm not totally picking up what it is that,

Okay.

No worries.

No worries.

I'll pull over for a moment,

Please only type of,

If it's safe,

Feel free to ask the question again.

But I think what I'm hearing you say in your questions and in your statements is I'm really hearing that you're already kind of aware of how this is functioning in you,

Although you're asking a question.

And this is an exploration for each of us.

The intellect loves to understand,

You know,

The intellect loves to have an understanding,

To feel empowered,

To feel in control.

And if we really want to tap into the richness of today's experience,

I invite that we kind of let go of that grasp of needing to know that,

That sense of one way or not,

You know,

Right wrong because our whole life experience,

We're all functioning with the ego.

And so sometimes if we're caught in needing to understand something a certain way,

We might be kind of overriding our own innate wisdom with the truth of what resides here for each of us in this experience today.

Maybe my words don't fully resonate with you,

But you have some spark of your own knowingness or intuition that guides you into something that makes sense for you.

So we can open there,

Open ourselves.

And all questions are welcome at the same time.

Absolutely.

So just take a breath for a moment.

Anything kind of coming to your awareness,

Friends?

Anything arising,

Any questions?

I'll pause for just a moment in case.

Okay,

Great.

Okay,

Great.

Good.

Good.

I'm glad it was clear.

Good.

Yeah,

Vanessa,

Take your time.

It's a lot to process.

And it's a pretty interesting concept because essentially what we're doing is we're trying to understand a functioning of our own being.

And if we haven't really heard these terms before or heard these definitions,

Or maybe we haven't explored them very much within ourselves,

It's kind of like,

You don't know what you don't know,

Or it's like having a blind spot.

You know how it's so easy to be in relationship with someone else.

You can see something they're doing.

You bring it up to them and they say,

I don't do that.

We all have these blind spots.

And when it comes to something like this that may be newer for our minds to take on,

At first it's kind of like,

How do you unpeel these two experiences?

The experience of,

I am ego to an experience of being able to witness the ego,

Or at least consider that the ego is a part of the experience,

But not who I am.

This can seem challenging.

So please take all of your time to just kind of explore this in your awareness.

Sarah is asking,

Where does the ego become willing and open to new ideas or beliefs?

Ah,

What a beautiful question.

And I'd like to answer that by sharing something first,

Sharing two things.

So I'll come back to that in just a moment,

Sarah.

And this is what we're going to get a little more into today.

Firstly,

Many of us,

If we are familiar with this idea of the spiritual ego,

We are also familiar with this idea of annihilating the ego,

Wanting to kill the ego,

Get rid of the ego.

I don't want this ego thing anymore,

It keeps me in fear.

I don't want this ego anymore,

It makes me small.

I don't want this ego anymore,

It keeps self-sabotaging me.

There's this feeling inside to get rid of it because it is the source of suffering.

And I remember when my beloved Ma shared this teaching,

It was really freeing because I had even held that feeling of like,

I want to get rid of this ego thing.

It's making me so unhappy.

And Sai Ma shared,

One,

That we need the ego to function,

Which all these years later with a little more education,

I really understand so much more.

We do need the ego to function.

It's this aspect of the personality,

Or as we could think about it,

As a way to filter all of the stimuli,

To have an experience of an individual when we're truly the infinite.

So we need the ego.

And of course,

This is one school of thought,

There are others.

So if we need the ego,

Does that mean we just deal with it or meditate and take our good days when they come?

And what Sai Ma teaches is that we enlighten the ego.

We enlighten the ego.

We even have different techniques and yogic practices where we're actually pouring light,

This vision of light into the ego,

Into the personality,

Enlightening the ego.

I mean,

Think about that.

We have these words in our awareness,

Enlightenment,

Ego,

Enlightening,

To actually pour light into the personality,

To pour love into the personality,

Into the ego,

To hold the ego and kindness and tenderness.

Maybe some of you have done this inner work where you're able to meet the ego.

And of course,

When we're meeting the ego,

We're meeting the ego with the ego.

It's kind of the joke of it there.

But to meet the ego with love and tenderness,

And when you're able to do that,

Maybe it's just in your mind or you have a deeper visceral experience or something else.

And it's like the ego starts to soften.

So coming back to your question,

Sarah,

To bring love to the ego,

To really bring love to the ego.

See the nature of the limited self,

The ego,

Is to push and to resist and to remain in this kind of suffering state.

And when we bring the quality of the heart,

I'm not talking about emotional love.

I'm not talking about love because I should love.

When we truly bring love to the ego,

It's like it starts to melt.

And many of us have probably had experiences like this that maybe we never thought of as the ego.

Maybe there was a time where you were feeling really angry or you were feeling really afraid or you were just in such an intense state of suffering,

Feeling resistance inside.

And then something happened where there was such a pure force of love that came to you.

Maybe it was just someone holding you and your heart just cracked open or you holding yourself and you just cracked open.

Or maybe just allowing yourself to feel the pain so fully that this well of compassion arose from within you.

It can look so many ways,

But maybe you've had this experience where you went from that intensity of emotion and resistance and suffering to feeling almost like a grace,

An opening,

A softening.

Then the wound is where the light enters,

This Rumi quote where the light enters.

Has anyone ever had this kind of experience?

Where you were in that contraction of the ego and then some source of love came into the space,

Whether it was a person or from within you or something else,

Your pet.

And it was like it just melted you.

And it's not just like,

Oh,

I feel a little better.

It's like it penetrates deep within the heart.

And in that moment it's like the ego is being held like a tender child.

Yeah,

Jane,

Great to see you.

And some of us haven't experienced that and that's okay.

You know,

It's part of the beauty of knowledge or taking in new concepts or new ideas about the world or teaching ourselves different things.

Learning expands our perspective.

Learning expands what can be possible in our experience because it opens our minds.

Now of course there are some things we can learn that will make us more pessimistic or judgmental and then it closes the mind.

But in general,

At least in regards to what I'm speaking to,

There's an openness that happens.

So if you've never had an experience like what I spoke about,

Don't worry,

You're not missing out.

There's not something wrong with you.

We all have different paths.

We all have different journeys and we can consider this.

Wow.

Wow.

How would that feel?

What would that be like if I found a way to allow love to be poured into the ego,

To enlighten the ego?

And I see Sarah shared,

Yes,

Recently through surrender.

Exactly.

That is one of my experiences again and again where there have just been so many moments in my life where I was in the throes of suffering,

Just so much pain,

Usually like on the floor crying out for help.

And there's something that cracks open and there's like this flood.

Maybe at first it feels like a trickle and then there's this flood of peace and it's like the ego is just being bathed in light,

Bathed in love,

Bathed in grace where for a few moments or maybe longer I'm not fighting life.

In my experience,

That is when the ego is being held,

When the fight stops.

And some of us don't even realize that we spend most of our days fighting.

We're just unaware of it because it's the nature of the inner experience.

So it is available to each and every one of us and it will look different for each of us.

I know some comments are coming in and I'd love to read your comments that are coming.

I just wanted to share,

I feel like I must have shared this with Julia,

If not with our entire community here.

Maybe 10 years ago or so,

At that point I had been studying with Saima for 10 years already and I had been on a spiritual path from the beginning of taking birth.

I was raised meditating and all of these things.

And about 10 years ago,

I had had some really significant awakening experiences,

Different from state and experience is ever changing,

It's temporary.

A state is an integrated way of being,

An embodied way of being.

And it's really maybe even beyond being like an embodiment because it's a state of beingness.

So I'd had some really significant experiences where the ego is just bathed in light.

It was almost like my mind wouldn't fully function in those experiences.

There was just this flood of grace and I was in total peace.

I remember the first time I had this kind of profound experience.

Maybe I'll share it briefly because I haven't shared this in quite some time.

I'll share the short version of it.

So I was on a retreat with Saima and it was a very intimate retreat.

There were probably,

I don't know,

Maybe for sure less than 100 people there.

And we were chanting and for anyone who has chanting as part of your life,

Kirtan or any devotional chanting,

It could be in any language,

There's something that happens in the heart.

It's like the heart just starts to open,

Even if the mind is in a really contracted place,

Oh,

This thing or oh,

This thing.

When we chant,

It's like it just opens the chambers of the heart and allows that emotion to move or whatever we're holding on to so tightly.

So we were on this retreat and we were just chanting.

And chanting is a powerful way to really get out of our own way.

And so I'm just chanting wholeheartedly and I just start sobbing.

And there was a thought that kind of triggered the crime,

But these tears,

It was like all the pain that I was holding on to just started to get unlocked.

And these tears are just coming and I was just chanting and sobbing and snotting and chanting and sobbing and trying to breathe.

And I was so deep in my own experience,

For many of us,

The idea of sobbing in public is atrocious.

It's the last thing we'd ever want to do.

And so I let myself though.

And even for someone like me,

Who's very expressed,

There's that deep vulnerability that made me want to hide,

To not let the tears out,

To not just break open,

Surrounded by other people.

But I did.

I just went for it.

I just let myself break open.

My eyes were closed and I was so inside of my own experience.

I wasn't even aware so much that anyone else was there.

I was just chanting and crying and so much just letting this pain come up.

And then someone tapped me on the shoulder and I opened my eyes and Saima had been in the room with us chanting.

And when I opened my eyes,

Saima was on the way out of the room,

But standing in the aisle,

Standing in my aisle,

Waiting for me.

And so I scrambled to like by all fours.

I don't think I even walked.

I might have.

And I went and I just put my head at Saima's feet and the sobs just came so intensely and I just disappeared.

The eye just disappeared.

And there was a body and there were tears and there was so much tenderness and it just was pouring out of me.

And I could feel at some point that Saima physically walked away,

But there was no eye left.

And whatever this experience was sat up.

And there must have been a little eye left because I was still conscious.

But I remember when I sat up and I could hardly move,

I don't know how long I was on my knees just crying.

And I looked around and there was this golden light everywhere.

Everything was just touched with golden light.

It was so beautiful.

And every person that I looked at was glowing with the same light.

And it was like my mind almost couldn't distinguish the difference between the space and the things in the space.

And I remember it was like I could barely move my head.

I didn't have very much control over the body.

And I remember looking on the stage and seeing like one of those metal chairs.

And I remember there was just this awareness.

It wasn't a thought.

It was like an awareness.

And the awareness was so beautiful.

I was looking at this chair and the chair was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

And it was just as beautiful as the carpet.

And it was just as beautiful as all the beautiful people in the room,

Everything.

It was just pure radiance and beauty.

And there wasn't an experience of Selena.

There wasn't an experience of,

Oh,

Should I be doing something different?

Should I say something?

Should I move?

Should I go?

There was just pure awareness.

And that is that ego being bathed in love.

So that experience didn't last in that intense way for more than 24 hours.

I was like,

Yeah,

I'm enlightened.

And then over the years,

I had a couple of other experiences,

Not as strong,

But a couple of other experiences.

But there was still just so much suffering.

So coming all the way full circle to the story that I was sharing to really highlight how we're all on different journeys here.

Many years after I'd had that experience that I just shared with you,

I was speaking to one of the deeply dedicated brothers in the community who is a monk and a teacher to such a beautiful,

Vibrant soul.

One of my most precious,

Precious hearts.

And I remember I was asking him,

I was like,

I've had such powerful awakening experiences and tastes of freedom.

And I just feel like there's just so much suffering that I live in.

And he said,

He basically just said in the most compassionate way that we all have different experiences.

Some of us,

We awaken like this.

The ego becomes enlightened in that space of that love and that light.

And they live in this state of grace.

It doesn't mean the ego goes away,

But the ego has been enlightened.

Yes.

And who knows?

It's different for each person how that lasts,

But it's a new state.

And for some of us,

It's like we have a taste of the light and then we're back in the suffering and we have a taste of the light.

And each time it's like that light is being deposited within us and it grows within us.

And each time we feed it with our thoughts,

With our actions,

With our intentions,

With our sadhana,

Our daily spiritual practice,

Each time we feed that light,

It grows and grows and grows within us.

It never goes away.

Never.

So if you feel like,

Oh,

Well,

I've never had an experience like that,

Or I don't even know what it's like to feel light and mere whatever,

I would just invite that you're right where you are meant to be for your path,

For your journey.

You are right where you are meant to be.

And how do you know?

Because that's where you are.

Okay.

I'm coming back to your comments now.

Julia,

I saw you typed something here.

Oh,

Thank you,

Sweetheart.

Julia shared,

I would highly recommend with love one-on-one sessions with our wonderful Selena.

Thank you,

Beloved.

That is my,

Other than being here like this together,

My greatest joy is our one-on-ones and of course being together in person and groups on retreats.

But absolutely,

It's the greatest honor of my heart.

Okay.

So what did Jason share here?

Love that.

My higher power,

Higher self surprised me.

Can be overwhelmingly amazing.

Delilah shared,

My ego was easily triggered when I felt falsely accused.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

The ego,

It's so much rooted in that fear and preservation and separation.

And there's this really,

I'm looking at the time here,

But I just want to share this and then I'm going to keep reading the comments.

It's a really fantastic teaching on enlightenment.

And you know,

We can take it or leave it.

So many of these teachings are very ancient teachings,

Meaning they're not just something that someone decided would be a nice idea.

They've been taught for so long because they are relevant or so many thousands,

Millions of people have had shared or similar experiences.

So they're not just,

You know,

Concepts that are being brought up.

They're long standing concepts that are being brought up.

Yes.

So there's this teaching about the pyramid and enlightenment.

Excuse my askew pyramid here.

And they kind of the teaching essentially,

I'll just teach it briefly here.

When we are really living with the ego,

Creating all of the separation,

You know,

We're kind of down here,

We're not very awake in our journey yet.

We're really just functioning through the senses and you know,

Whatever else.

And then through maybe one lifetime or through our many,

Many,

Many,

Many lifetimes of evolving,

We start to climb the pyramid.

It's like we go higher and higher up the pyramid.

And we could think about this pyramid as,

You know,

Representing our spiritual evolution.

Yes.

The bottom is kind of when we're less evolved spiritually.

And the top is,

You know,

The crème de la crème,

Whatever that really is.

Yes.

And maybe there is,

I highly doubt there's ever an ending,

You know,

Who knows the unending states of being that can be experienced in this duality.

So not even the duality in the oneness.

So here we are in our spiritual evolution where we're growing,

We're growing,

We're growing,

We're growing,

We're evolving,

Evolving,

Evolving,

Become more and more awakened,

Closer and closer to an experience of that absolute freedom of the self.

And then we get into this top part of the pyramid.

And this top part of the pyramid,

You know,

You're kind of like,

Wow,

I've had all these awakening experiences here.

It was like,

Oh,

I'm suffering,

I'm suffering,

I'm separate.

And then you kind of get in here and you're like,

Wow,

I'm starting to understand the beauty of life and spirit and God and I'm one with all of creation and things are so wonderful and I'm a kind person and I'm so compassionate and look,

I can feel free.

You know,

We start to really awaken and all these beautiful qualities of the heart and the light and the presence we are.

And then we reach the top of the pyramid,

Dun,

Dun,

Dun.

And this is when the ego gets really strong,

Really strong.

And maybe there'll be moments of that absolute bliss state or those more enlightened experiences or awakened experience.

But here is where the ego is fighting so hard because the ego thinks when it gets here that it,

That it,

It gets annihilated.

The ego is so afraid of losing its sense of self,

The sense of identity,

The sense of existing that it is going to do everything it can to keep us in suffering even though we're so darn close.

Right?

And so that's also where so much of this tenderness comes in.

It's not about fighting the ego or beating the ego or resisting the ego.

It's about embracing the ego.

How do we bring compassion to this part that is terrified of not existing?

How do we hold ourselves in love when we feel so afraid of being judged by others?

How do we be compassionate with ourselves when we make mistakes?

When we,

When we tell ourselves BS stories like,

Oh,

I'm going backwards.

Oh,

I was so more evolved and now I'm going backwards.

How do we be compassionate with ourselves?

We're not linear science projects.

We are an ever moving creation of energy and life.

How can we bring that light to that part that is so afraid of loss?

So afraid.

If you had a small child that was so afraid,

Just terrified,

Absolutely terrified,

Terrified to the point that that we will hold onto things that we know are destructive for the sake of this sense of existing or feeling or some,

Some false sense of safety.

You had a child that felt that way.

Would you beat them up?

Would you tell them they were failing?

Would you,

Would you try to annihilate them?

Would you meditate for hours a day so that they would stop being that way or would you hold them in your arms?

Oh,

Precious.

It's okay.

It's okay.

You're okay.

Oh,

You're okay.

That's what we can give to ourselves.

That's what we can give to the ego.

I love you.

Okay.

I'm going to go back through a few more comments because I know there were some that I didn't see here.

I'm just reading some of your comments about the experiences that you're having.

Oh,

Beautiful,

Sarah.

I'm reading your comment.

Your self-love,

Forgiveness,

Self-forgiveness did that to me.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

Yeah.

So Lynn is asking,

What do you do to maintain the awareness?

Ooh,

I wish there was a formula for that.

And actually,

Let me,

There is a formula.

The first formula is let go.

First part of the formula is let go.

The second part of the formula,

And this is a really,

Really important part of,

Important part of the formula,

My friends.

Do not try to get the experience again.

Do not search for the experience again.

And we're going to do it.

We're going to do that.

If you become aware of it though,

Come back to part one of the formula,

Let go.

So part one is let go.

Part two is stop trying to get back to an exalted experience that you've had.

And then three,

And this isn't an actual formula.

I'm just,

You know,

Bringing some important parts together that can help us in our journey.

Sarana.

Sarana is daily spiritual practice.

Remember,

Like I was saying,

There's this light inside.

We are light.

Each of us are light.

It is our essence.

We are infinite beings and we are light.

And when we do things to cultivate,

To activate this light within us,

It's there.

But if you,

You know,

Think about it,

If you have a fire inside that you never tend to,

Maybe the fire is raging and then it gets smaller and smaller and smaller.

And then finally the fire is just a little tiny flame.

And then,

And then finally the fire is just smoke,

But it's still there.

We need to tend to the flame of our light.

Sarana,

I'll spell it here.

It means it's Sanskrit for daily spiritual practice.

Sarana.

Daily spiritual practice.

And there are so many different things that we can do as daily spiritual practices.

It doesn't just need to look like meditation.

It can look like spending time in nature.

It could look like all of these different things.

However,

In my very limited experience and limited understanding,

When we are speaking to this specifically,

There are different techniques that will light that flame more than others.

Now,

I don't know that as an absolute,

So I really don't.

You know,

Maybe for you,

There's some incredibly exalted spiritual experience that occurs when you just stand in a circle of trees and that fire within you is totally lit.

However,

For many of us,

We need very specific techniques to nurture that light within.

And that's why so many of these,

That's why yoga is actually a science.

I love this idea because so often we say things like,

Oh,

We need peer reviewed studies and we need hard proof.

You want to see the hard proof.

And I'm saying this very lightly here.

There is actual science to back this up.

But my general comment here is that something like the practices of yoga,

These are literally quite often the same techniques that have been used for thousands of years,

Thousands,

Not just like a few hundred,

Thousands of years,

Same techniques.

And it's because they work.

And there's so much more around that.

It's not just oral history and so on.

So I invite you to look more into that if you're curious about it.

Yogic sciences,

Yogic teachings and techniques and practices.

And it's not about religion.

It's not like,

Oh,

You have to believe in Hindu gods to be in the path of yoga.

Where was I going with that?

Techniques we're talking about the formula,

Sadhana.

So there are very specific techniques that you can explore for yourself.

For example,

Pranayama,

Different breathing techniques are so powerful to light that light,

To enliven that light within us.

And there are many other things.

I have many,

Many different meditations here on the app that serve us in that enlivening of that light so that we do have an experience of more light,

Of more love within us.

And then it is easier to hold that ego consciousness as ego consciousness in love,

Enlighten the personality,

Enlighten the ego.

It's not about annihilating it.

It's not about getting rid of it.

It's about enlightening it,

Pouring your light into that contracted space.

That identity with the small self and you are the big self.

Hi,

Elena.

Ah,

Anika,

I just saw your message.

Yeah,

Sweetheart,

You can just come cry on my shoulder right here.

Anyone,

You're always welcome.

If you're having a moment and you feel safe or loved by me,

Just imagine I'm right there with you right now.

Just imagine your head is on my shoulder,

On my heart,

And I'm just stroking your head.

Or maybe your head is just on my lap,

But I'm just holding you.

Or sometimes maybe you just feel scared or something feels like it's too much.

Imagine I'm just there holding your hand.

You're not alone.

And that's part of the beauty in this oneness.

We are always with each other.

Ah,

Yeah,

Yeah,

Elena,

Exactly.

We are taught to get rid of it.

And that's why we're here in this conversation today,

To maybe offer something new,

The embracing of it.

Yeah,

Yeah.

Thank you,

Sweet friends.

Thank you for all of your time and your beautiful heart.

I'm right here with you.

If you're hurting,

I'm right here with you.

I'm right here.

I'm right here,

Right in your heart.

You might even just imagine my hands are just holding your face,

Holding your heart,

Just holding you.

And you can do this to yourself.

You can hold your cheek.

You can hold your heart and just be there with you.

Just be here.

Oh,

Love you,

Enemy.

Yeah.

Oh,

I'm so glad,

Jane.

I'm so glad.

All right,

My dearest hearts.

Hi,

Martin.

Thank you.

Again,

Take whatever resonated for you.

Leave the rest.

Be curious.

This is your exploration with yourself.

Resonate with the word God.

So,

I invite you to replace the word God with a word that works for you.

Something Ma taught me many years ago,

Many,

All of us,

Ma would say,

God loves me so much.

God loves me so much.

So,

Whatever God is for you,

Space,

Sun,

Spirit,

Source,

God loves me so much.

Say this to yourself.

God loves me so much.

God loves me so much.

You are so,

So,

So loved.

So loved.

Go find yourself.

Go find yourself inside,

Not out there.

Go inside.

Find you.

Be with yourself.

Hold yourself.

Care for yourself.

And when your mind is caught in fears and judgments,

Go be with you.

That's not the time to abandon yourself or distract yourself or judge yourself.

Go sit with yourself.

Oh,

Precious,

My dearest self,

What do you need?

What do you need?

.

Reviews

Such an important talk. Trying to get rid of ego is fighting life. Let’s offer it love instead.

Thank you 🙏💛

Embracing Ego.....was a very important and insightful talk that I just listened to.

I often thought my ego is a separate entity from my BE-ing. I did not value it or recognise that it was part of me - my life.

I was told by my mentor that the ‘ego’ is part of BE-ing! I was in shock as I never wanted to befriend this manipulative entity, yet it has a dual role to play - Good & Bad.

I enjoyed your talk as it enlightened my understanding of my ‘ego’. I feel that my perspective of treating my ego as an outsider could be the right approach for me as I always treated it like that ‘demon’ who wishes to exploit my life as it pleases - comes and goes - to confuse my life’s alignment with my BE-ing!

I always tried to befriend it though so that it does not rule my sacred life. I go a step further since I listened to your talk and start to love it too. This is due because at the moment my spiritual path is going through rough terrain so I must stay strong, remain patient and love myself more - clarity and stability shall follow!

Selena, you warmed up my heart with joy and love listening to such a powerful topic - my ego shall not use me and I shall treat it with respect and kindness so that I'll not lose my creation's true identity 🙌🏻🤍❣️🕊️😊.

Much love n light & thank you 🙏🏻💓✨🌻

Beautiful session thank you for sharing