What Is Your Deepest Desire?

Céline Harleaux – Host of the award-winning It's A Funny Thing Podcast. Author of 40 Days To Self-Love. Advanced ThetaHealing Practitioner.

Since 2017, Céline has inspired thousands of women to improve their relationship with themselves, using simple and effective tools. Céline’s audience absolutely loves her playfulness, authenticity and honesty – she never hesitates to share her most awkward stories, as well as her best tips for powerful and long-lasting change.

Transcript

This program was produced by and first broadcast on Radio Hawke's Bay,

Your community access media station.

Thanks to New Zealand On Air for making this type of programming possible.

Good morning and welcome to It's a Funny Thing with Celine.

Um,

Yeah,

It's our second episode in It's a Funny Thing,

But really,

I think we've reached over 80 episodes in the podcast altogether.

So I wanted to talk a little bit about the new name for the show and why I chose it and why it's relevant for us.

So the previous name of the show was Your Time to Shine.

And,

Um,

Yeah,

Where do we start?

It was a good title while my focus was on self-love.

Um,

But now after a couple of years of reflection into who I was and what I wanted to do and who I wanted to help,

I decided that a better name for the show was It's a Funny Thing.

And what is a funny thing?

Well,

I think I deeply,

Deeply believe that life is a funny thing.

You know,

All our stories of heartbreak and despair and anger and anxiety and bliss and,

You know,

Looking at the sunshine through the leaves in the tree in your backyard and,

You know,

Watching a child smile for the first time.

You know,

We,

It's a funny thing.

Life is a funny thing.

And,

Um,

I am very well known for taking myself too seriously.

So this is our invitation to find the fun,

Find the joy and the laughter through the tears,

Through the sadness,

Through the grief,

Through the accomplishments as well,

Through the joy.

So find,

Find the joy,

Find the fun in everything.

And,

Um,

Because,

You know,

We're so focused on what we want and what we think we want and what we haven't accomplished yet.

And,

And we really define ourselves with these measures,

These,

These points.

So,

You know,

You might,

Um,

Like have a think about who you think you are,

You know,

You,

Or have a think about what your life has been so far.

The very first things that are going to pop in your mind,

I guarantee you,

Are,

You know,

The divorce,

The stories of abuse,

The mean things that that girl said to you in high school,

Um,

You know,

Stories of poverty or,

You know,

Things that you wanted but haven't come to pass,

All the regrets,

You know,

The weight that you have gained and so on.

Can you see that?

Can you see how your life is determined by all those,

Um,

All those experiences of sadness and,

Um,

And regrets and,

And,

And deep anger as well?

And so we,

We choose to focus really on those,

Um,

I'm going to call them heartbreaks.

They are heartbreaks,

You know,

All the things that we wanted and didn't come to pass,

All the people that we wanted to love but didn't love us back,

Etc,

Etc,

Etc.

You know,

Those heartbreaks have come to define us and we have let them.

And so instead of thinking about all the beautiful moments in your childhood and,

You know,

The great exams that you had as a child,

I don't know,

Or,

Um,

You know,

Your first love and how you felt and no matter how it ended,

Right?

Um,

I don't know,

The first time you looked at yourself in the mirror and realized,

Wow,

I really have great hair,

Like it's so shiny.

You know,

We,

We,

We choose to really shift our focus to the negative instead of,

Um,

The positive,

Right?

And so it's my invitation to you through It's a Funny Thing to help you to,

Um,

Or to get you,

To invite you to,

Um,

To shift your perspective to all that you are and to take a step back and see the beauty of everything that you are.

And this is actually a really great introduction for our topic for today.

So when I was tuning in this morning,

I haven't had any inspiration for this topic,

For,

For this episode,

Sorry,

For today.

And I've just been sort of procrastinating as we do.

And,

Um,

And so today I thought,

Oh dear,

You know,

The producer of It's a Funny Thing is going to call me very soon.

I'm going to go on holiday tomorrow,

So I need to sort this out today and why not do it first thing this morning while I'm alone in the house.

So anyway,

I tuned in and I,

I asked,

Okay,

So what's,

What's the topic for today?

What's the highest and best topic for today?

What,

What do we need to talk about?

What do we need to learn?

What do we need to explore together?

And so I had this very strange vision of,

Um,

It's going to sound so crazy,

But bear with me.

It's going to make sense.

Of a really bright spaceship.

I've been obsessed with spaceships lately.

Anyway,

A really bright spaceship coming towards me and it was,

You know,

Gold and beautiful.

And I'm not into spaceship.

I mean,

I'm not into sci-fi,

You know,

So it's,

It's sort of odd for me to see this.

And I thought,

Dear God,

What is going on?

Anyway,

The spaceship is coming towards me.

It lands next to me and out of the spaceship comes this beautiful,

Bright,

Golden being.

And I know I knew straight when I saw this being that that was a future version of me.

Like,

Um,

Like say the most accomplished version of me that I can think of.

You know,

The version of me or the future,

Um,

Future Celine that has,

Um,

Shifted all the darkness and the density.

And,

And she's bright and she knows,

She knows who she is and she is,

Um,

Certain about who she is,

I think is the right way to say it.

I don't know how else to express it and it might not make sense to you.

But she came towards me and I knew that it was,

It was me in a sense.

It was,

It was future Celine and I could see,

I could,

I could feel the connection between us.

I could feel that the core of us was,

Was the same.

And so I knew that she was me.

And,

Um,

She came towards me and she asked,

Celine,

Um,

What did she ask?

What is your deepest desire?

What a question,

Right?

What is your deepest desire?

Um,

It's funny because I have lots of things that I want.

I want a puppy.

I want,

Um,

I want to do some things in the garden.

I want to do this.

I want to do that.

I want to,

Um,

I actually want to sell my pottery.

This is one thing that I want to do this year.

So I want to make enough that I can sell in the shop.

Um,

I want lots of things.

I want to feel more like this and I want to feel less like that.

Um,

But that was not her question I knew.

And it went beyond,

You know,

The manifesting million dollar things and having the fancy car and the designer bags or whatever it is that we think we want.

It went beyond that and actually I would like to invite you to think about what it is that you truly deeply desire.

So what is your deepest desire?

So if you can,

If it's safe for you to do so now,

You can close your eyes and take a moment to center,

Um,

To find your center.

Take some deep breaths in and out.

And take a moment to,

You can do this,

You know,

Um,

You don't have to close your eyes and,

And stop what you're doing.

You can,

You can,

You know,

Do this while you're washing the dishes or whatever.

Um,

Perhaps if you're driving,

It's better if you pull over or just,

You know,

Press pause and listen to this when you're not driving anymore.

Um,

So find your center and straight away become aware of all of your desires and dreams and wishes for yourself.

So they're going to feel like,

You know,

Little bubbles of desires around you.

I want you to,

Um,

Just sort of push these all away.

The bigger desire and the smaller desires.

Um,

Push them all away until you find something that's a bit deep.

I want to have energy when I wake up in the morning.

Okay,

That's a deeper desire,

But let's go even deeper.

I want to be successful as an artist.

Okay,

Cool.

That's a,

That's a deeper desire,

But let's go beneath that.

And you're going to go on this journey of finding the desires and then going even deeper and even deeper and even deeper.

If your desire is to be a successful,

Abundant artist,

Well,

What is that desire going to bring you?

How is that going to make you feel?

That is one way to get into the deeper desire.

So for example,

Say I want to be a successful,

Abundant artist.

If when I reach that goal,

I will feel,

Um,

Certain of who I am.

I will feel abundant.

I will feel recognized.

I will feel in flow.

I will feel connected.

Ah,

That is the deeper desire for me.

And that was my answer this morning when that future Celine asked me what my deeper desire was.

Hey,

Did you hear my cat?

He's meowing to me.

Hey,

Max.

Where are you?

He's meowing to let me know where he is.

Isn't that cute?

Such a good little baby.

Anyway.

Um,

So yeah,

I said this morning,

Um,

That I wanted to feel connected.

And for me,

That is the deeper desire that drives everything that I am.

I want to feel connected.

I want to feel connected to the universe around me.

I want to feel connected to my husband,

To my cat,

To my home.

I want to feel connected to my purpose inside of me.

I want to feel connected to my body.

I want to feel connected to my mind.

I want to feel connected to my family.

I want to feel connected to God.

And all the experiences that I seek or that I create,

All the situations that I create,

Are all an attempt to go deeper into connection.

And when a situation doesn't go the way I want it to go,

Then that's an opportunity for me to find connection despite everything.

Despite,

You know,

Being yelled at.

The other day somebody yelled at me for 10 minutes and then shut the door in my face.

And I thought,

Wow,

This could have gone so differently.

And I wasn't upset about it.

I mean,

I was frustrated about the situation,

But I wasn't hurt.

I didn't take it personally the way I would have a year or two,

Five,

Ten years ago.

So I was really proud of myself for that.

But even in that situation,

I was seeking connection,

And the person said,

I don't want to connect with you,

So,

You know,

Fadlaf.

And that was the end of that.

So anyway,

So what is your deeper desire?

I would love to really hear from you.

So if you want to send me a message,

You can.

I would really love to hear what your deeper desire is.

And abundance is not really an answer in the sense that we,

Of course,

It's an answer,

But it's always going to be a deeper desire beyond that.

What I mean is that we are so focused on what we don't have.

Again,

We define ourselves by what we don't have.

We look at what the neighbor has or a friend has or,

I don't know,

A family member has,

And we're like,

I don't have that.

I'm not abundant.

Or we look at social media.

Social media is becoming an addiction for many of us,

And we need to be really careful.

I know that scrolling through my social media feeds can make me feel really good or it can make me feel really crap depending on what I see and depending on who I compare myself to.

Because remember,

Social media is not an accurate reflection of life.

And what we see on social media,

Even the let's be real posts and videos and whatever,

That's not,

You know,

It's all,

Everything is designed to get your attention and to get reaction,

Right?

Because everybody wants to have,

You know,

A viral post.

So remember that.

Social media is not a way for you to learn who you want to be and what your desire is.

You know,

And we see all of these coaches and entrepreneurs that are so successful,

But remember that there is a million more coaches and entrepreneurs that are struggling out there.

And we know we listen to them,

You know,

Saying that,

Oh,

You know,

I just think about my desire,

And then it comes to pass.

And,

You know,

The less I do,

The more I let the universe help me,

The more my stuff manifests,

You know.

Yes,

But also,

You know,

They have spent years and years building an audience and they have a whole team of people that supports them behind the scene.

So yes,

They have belief systems that support that,

That support,

You know,

That manifestation process,

But they've also done the hard work and nobody really talks about that,

That there has been years of struggle.

Anyway,

My point is that abundance is not quite the answer because you're focused on,

Because it's,

Well,

From my perspective,

What you really want from abundance,

Through abundance,

Is connection,

Is feeling that the universe responds to you,

Is feeling connected to your purpose.

And I think that that is going to be the deeper desire for all of you.

So see if you can go deeper and deeper.

And if you come to the same conclusion,

Great.

If you don't,

That's fine.

But I think that what we are all searching for is a connection to our purpose,

You know,

Feeling connected to our purpose and feeling that we are in sync and flow with our purpose.

I think that we all want to have,

We all want that,

Right?

We all want to know that we are useful in this world.

We all want to see that the words that we speak and the actions that we take are useful,

Are making a difference,

Are making a tangible difference in the world.

So I would like you to connect to the deeper desire inside of you,

Whether it's connection or something else.

You may feel it inside your heart or anywhere in your body,

Anywhere in your space,

Anywhere in your energy.

And feel,

See,

Sense the connection that you already have to your purpose.

It's not about,

You know,

Your purpose is not about,

You know,

Standing on the stage,

Talking to millions of people or having a retreat center.

Your purpose goes beyond that.

It's much more powerful than you having a retreat center or even just,

You know,

A booktel calendar for the next six months or whatever.

Your purpose quite simply is to love and be loved in your own particular,

Specific,

Special,

Unique way.

So how does your soul want to express love?

How does your deeper self want to express love?

In an ideal world,

In an ideal life,

It doesn't matter how many mistakes you've made or how many times people have hurt you.

How is it that you express love?

And it goes beyond the love languages as well.

You know,

It goes beyond,

You know,

Receiving,

You know,

Physical touch or,

You know,

Quality time or gifts or words of affection or whatever.

How is it that you express love to the world?

And I think that this is a question that we all need to ask ourselves,

You know,

No matter who you are,

How spiritual you are or not.

This is a question that we all need to ask ourselves.

You know,

We live our lives in an automatic,

Unconscious way,

Right?

We just get up,

Go to work,

Come back home,

Make some dinner,

Go to sleep.

If you were awake,

If you were connected to your purpose,

What would change in your life?

If you were deeply connected to your soul,

How would you move through the world?

How would you connect with others?

If you stop being afraid of the lack of abundance in your life,

The lack of love,

The lack of opportunities,

If you let go of all that resentment and rage and sadness and heartbreak inside of you,

Then what would your purpose be?

How would you,

Who would you be in this world?

Who do you really want to be in this world?

Beyond the stuff you want or stuff you think you want,

Who do you want to be?

And for me,

My answer is always connection.

Always connection.

Connection to abundance,

Of course.

Connection to people.

Connection to God.

Connection to myself.

And when I feel connected,

I feel that I have the opportunity,

The freedom to be all that I am.

Without any shame,

Without any doubt,

Without any fear of being judged,

Without feeling that I'm not enough,

Without giving up before I've even started because I'm afraid.

You know,

When I am connected,

I feel seen.

And it's fun.

Isn't it fun?

So allow yourself to connect to your deeper desire.

Deepest desire,

Should I say.

And you may only feel a tenuous,

Like a very weak or superficial connection to your purpose now.

Or it might be stronger.

See what's in the way of you connecting to your deeper desire.

Deepest desire.

And imagine,

Feel,

See,

Sense that you are sending love and light to the block.

The blockage,

The burden,

The limitations.

Until you feel,

See,

Sense that your connection to your purpose is,

Or to your deepest desire is deepening,

Is growing,

Is becoming more and more intense.

You may have a sense now that whatever you thought was blocking you is actually an illusion.

It doesn't feel real anymore.

And yes,

You may need to work on some of the specific stuff,

But most of all,

It just doesn't seem real,

Does it?

It's not as,

You know,

Again,

We focus on our blockages and our triggers and our limiting beliefs,

But they're not real.

They've never been real.

So can you come to that understanding?

Or would you like to have that understanding that your limiting beliefs are not real?

And that there is something inside of you that is much more powerful than any limiting belief you may have?

And can we shift your perspective from the negative to the positive?

From your traumas and your hurts and your heartbreaks to all the magnificence and complexity and simplicity as well,

And the brilliance of who you are.

And so it is.

So come back,

Come back to this space and this time.

You are welcome to open your eyes now and take some deep breaths.

And you may need to have a bit of food or a drink of water.

And I hope that this episode was helpful for you and that you learned something about yourself that you always wanted to learn.

Your homework is to connect your deeper desire,

Deepest desire,

Good.

Your deepest desire again and again and again.

So the best way to do it is to set a reminder on your phone.

And when your alarm rings,

Just go and do it.

Because we live our lives and we waste our time and we waste our days doing superficial things and trying to get ahead.

But the only thing that you need to do is to connect and to be present.

So I would highly suggest that you set an alarm on your phone and for 5 minutes,

10 minutes,

20 minutes,

You sit your butt down on the couch and you close your eyes and you find a space of presence and connection to yourself and God and the world around you.

And that will shift you,

It will.

But you have to be consistent with it.

Reminded of self.

Anyway,

I'm sending you so much love.

If you have an idea or suggestion,

A question for a future podcast episode,

Please feel free to reach out to me and I will see you next time on the show.

Bye.