Rewriting Your Narrative

There’s an awesome scene in the Superman movie when Christopher Reeve uses his superhuman strength to stop the Earth’s rotation. And then he spins the planet backward. He changes the course of history. While you and I may not be able to change history, we can change the future. Too often, we forget this. We live our lives through routines and patterns. Repeatedly, we react to life in the same way, we often lose sight of how much agency we do have. This meditation experiments with how we can change our narrative, the story of our life.
Music by TunePockets. Relaxing Guitar Ambience / Above as Below

Transcript

Hello friends,

This is Marian.

There's this awesome scene in the Superman movie when Christopher Reeve gives the earth a healthy shove.

Time stops and then it goes backward.

He changes the course of history.

While you and I may not be able to change history,

We can change the future.

Too often we forget this.

We live our lives through routines and patterns.

Repeatedly we react to life in the same way.

We lose sight of how much agency we have.

This meditation experiments with how we can change our narrative,

The story of our life.

Stories are fascinating and we all have one unique to us.

A great story,

One that keeps us on the edge of our seat,

Is neither boring nor is it predictable.

It is filled with highs and lows,

With surprises,

And with intense emotion.

A great story leaves us with something we didn't have when we started.

It gets us thinking in a new way.

A great story evokes some sort of change.

We try to predict the outcome and yet we acknowledge that it is when we don't guess right.

These are the best stories when we didn't see it coming.

What if we were able to live our life this way?

What if we were able to put just enough structure and foundation into place and then actually relish the parts that we don't know,

Instead of trying to constantly control them?

Stepping with wonder and awe into the uncertainty,

Writing our own story we can make our life magical,

The magic of evolution,

Of growth.

A great story has a slow build.

Gradually and very,

Very gently we learn to play with the ambiguity in our lives.

We start small.

We allow ourselves to get a little bit uncomfortable,

Slowly leaving behind what we know to experience what we don't know.

We write new chapters,

Chapters that allow us to grow into our character,

To evolve.

So let's imagine that you are writing a new chapter.

We begin by sinking into this moment,

This place in time,

However and wherever you are.

Sink into this moment.

Feel your body breathing,

The natural flow and rhythm of the breath.

Breathing in,

Your shoulders rise,

Your chest and your belly expand.

Breathing out,

The shoulders drop,

The navel goes back to the spine and the body softens.

The natural flow and rhythm of the body,

Of the breath.

Feel your body breathe.

Feel your body breathe.

Now bring your attention to your face.

Feel the softness of the face.

See if you can soften the eyes,

The area around the eyes.

Perhaps you can release the tiny wrinkles in the forehead.

Feel the forehead softened.

Now release the jaw,

Soften the throat,

The neck,

And let the shoulders relax.

Feel your body breathe.

Maybe it's possible to feel your beating heart or the air in your lungs.

Maybe you can feel the energy in your fingertips or in the palm of your hand.

Notice breathing in,

The entire body expands.

Feel the breath filling you up.

Breathing out,

The body softens.

The natural flow and rhythm of the breath.

Feel your body breathe.

Now bring your attention to the area inside your mind.

Behind the eyes,

Below the brain.

Soften the eyes and turn inward.

And spend a moment contemplating your life story so far.

What is one word or phrase that describes your life story so far?

How clear is it to you that you are the hero of your story?

What is it that makes you feel this way?

See if it's possible for you to feel this in your body.

Perhaps there is a sureness,

A certainty,

And you notice this in your posture,

The squareness of your shoulders,

Or the warmth in your chest.

Or perhaps there is an unease you feel in your body,

Some sort of conflict with the idea of being the hero of your story,

A tightness or a tension.

Or maybe you don't feel anything at all here.

What do you notice?

In each of our stories there are two roles we play.

The first is the character we play.

Perhaps at this point in your life things are going well and it is easy for you to relate to being the hero.

Or perhaps things feel more out of your control and you see yourself more as a supporting actor or perhaps as an extra.

However you relate,

Without judgment,

Simply notice where you are at this time in your life.

See if you can step outside of yourself and observe.

The second role we play may not seem as obvious.

This is our role as author.

The author stands outside the story.

The author is not drowning in overwhelming emotion or caught up in a reactive state.

The author is observing the action and then writing the next day's script.

Your author owns the evolution of your character.

Your story is not so much about what happens.

There will always be things outside of our control.

No amount of planning will prevent this.

This is all background.

Your story,

Your beautiful story,

Is about the evolution of your character.

About how your character morphs to deal with life's challenges.

Your story is about who you were and who you become.

There is an inflection point in our lives when we are able to see that not only are we a character in a story,

But we are also the authors of our own lives.

Once we get this,

Life shifts.

When we believe this,

There is an extraordinary power and agency here.

With reflection,

Self-compassion,

And work,

We can do some amazing things and evolve into being the people that we choose to be.

There's a quote by Carolyn McHugh.

She says,

Most of us don't take up the full space the universe intended for us.

Imagine living your life in a way in which you are taking up the full space the universe intended for you.

What would this look like for you?

What would be different about how you live your life?

We write our story one line at a time.

We reflect and we learn as we go.

This is how evolution and transformation occur.

We reflect and then we make choices about our next steps.

When we look closely,

We see an underlying theme of ambiguity,

Of uncertainty running through our storyline.

And oftentimes,

A key component of this is fear.

When you look back over your life,

It may be easy to see how you've dealt with fear.

We tend to repeat the same behaviors over and over again.

There is a pattern.

Pattern 1.

We are scared.

We make ourselves small,

So quiet and invisible.

We don't risk being seen or heard.

We are stagnant inside,

And yet it is so insidious we don't notice it happening.

The cold and the numbness feel normal.

We are afraid and barely alive,

And we don't know it.

Pattern 2.

We grab our armor and our weapons and we go on the attack,

Bold and brazen and reckless.

We don't wait to see who is there or what they offer.

We are right,

And we know it.

We convince ourselves that we are doing this for the good of others.

What we don't see is that we are the ones creating the chaos and uncertainty for those around us.

Often we have not come to terms with the real fear inside,

So the fear continues to build.

There is no peace here.

A third pattern is similar.

It is less about self-righteousness and more about action.

We feel good when we are productive,

So we keep moving,

And yet we are not always moving in alignment with what really matters to us.

It feels counterintuitive to stop and reflect,

So we don't.

And when we get to the end of our story,

We find that we have landed in the wrong place.

Consumed by the momentum,

We never pause to course correct.

There are many other patterns.

Perfectionism,

Controlling tendencies,

Pleasing behaviors,

Conflict avoidance.

None is better than the other.

And then there is the pattern of consciousness,

The one we strive for.

We write the story as we go,

One chapter,

One page,

One paragraph,

One line at a time.

This requires being open and honest with ourselves.

It requires vulnerability and courage.

Clearly this is more challenging for some.

Geography,

Economics,

Gender,

Skin color,

Religion,

Heritage,

Body type,

Body functionality,

All of these things,

And so many more,

Make our stories unique.

Some stories will have more drama than others.

What they all have in common is the opportunity for the character to evolve,

To grow.

And this is how we learn to rewrite our narrative,

Slowly and gently.

And while there is fear here,

We learn to transform it into a different type of fear.

It's not the scary monster under the bed.

It's a tingling,

Exciting rush of what could be.

Pause here for a moment and allow yourself to come back into the body.

The natural flow and rhythm of the breath.

Notice this in the body.

The shoulders rise,

The body expands.

The shoulders drop,

The body relaxes.

The natural flow and rhythm of the breath.

Just notice your body breathing.

Now,

Imagine taking up the full space the universe intended for you.

Remind yourself of what this would look like for you.

See this version of yourself.

Now bring to mind some area of your life where you would like to experiment with making a change.

And again,

Whatever feels right to you.

Oftentimes,

The more sustainable changes are the smaller ones.

So just some area of your life where you would like to make a change.

What is the current situation?

How would your character typically respond in this situation?

How is your character not taking up the full space the universe intended for you?

Now imagine your character is waking up after a full night of deep and restful sleep.

See if it's possible to envision this.

It's the start of a new day and you watch yourself waking up.

See yourself and familiar surroundings.

Notice the furniture,

Colors.

Notice the look on your face.

It is peaceful and confident.

See if it's possible to see yourself through a lens of caring and compassion.

There's no fear here.

There's an excitement on the brink of something new.

And it is so clear you don't have to continue to play the same part over and over again.

New costumes,

New roles,

New temperaments.

Breathe into this moment.

Reach deep into your heart and feel the love and compassion of this moment.

Today you will take up the full space the universe intended for you.

What does this look like for you?

How will you be different today?

At the end of this meditation I encourage you to take a moment and write this down.

It can be as simple as one word.

Place it somewhere where you will see it throughout the day.

And at the end of the day reflect on your progress.

Not with judgment,

But with curiosity.

If the day went well and you took a step in the intended direction,

Celebrate this.

How can you take a further step tomorrow?

If the day didn't go as well,

What got in the way?

Picture yourself as the hero of your story.

Tomorrow is a new day.

What will your character,

Your hero,

Do tomorrow?

And then tomorrow and the next day and the day after that and after that,

Repeat the practice.

This is you,

Writing your story,

Creating new and beautiful patterns.

This is you,

Converting the negative energy of fear into a spark of purpose and passion,

One page at a time.

This is you,

Rewriting your narrative.

This is the end of today's session.

Thank you for joining me.

I'm grateful for your presence.

Reviews

A truly wonderful journey in self-awareness and surrender. Thank you 🙏🏽