Here I Am

This is a meditation on coming back to center when you’re feeling caught in the whirlwind, fragmented, or off track. It combines breath, body, and being and integrates the mantra “Here I am.” It will help you feel more present, grounded, and conscious of the life you’ve been gifted.

Transcript

This is a moment of coming back to center. A moment to help bring your breath, Your body, And your being back into alignment. I invite you to settle into yourself, Into the body you're in. Noticing and adjusting your posture to being both relaxed and receptive. Try to close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. And allow yourself to be here, Awake and attentive. For a moment we're going to reflect on this phrase, Here I am. Here I am. I find these simple words helpful as I'm so often caught up in the whirlwind of life that I'm everywhere else it seems except right here. Maybe I'm half here or semi-present but my mind is occupied or racing elsewhere. My body almost seems severed, Forgotten, Until those times it seems my body gets in the way. And yet part of me suspects it is the way. It's so easy to lose ourselves in our pursuits, Our distractions, And our many wounds. It's easy to be so caught up in a flurry of activity or thoughts that we dislodge and disconnect from our deepest selves within. In our modern world we seem to live and work and play and commune in so many different places and spaces that we can feel pulled apart in many ways. And for some of us, While trying to leave our mark in the world, We leave pieces of ourselves scattered and flung far to distant shores. Some of these pieces were taken, Others we gave away, And bit by bit we start showing up as lesser in our lives, In pieces, Mere fragments of who we are. And when we slow down enough there is a dull ache that gnaws at us that we've drifted far from home. And yet that same ache in our deepest place reminds us that it doesn't need to be this way. That what once was lost can be found again. That what was scattered can be brought back together. That these pieces of us aren't as far away as they seem. That wholeness and holy union is closer than we think. It's at the tips of our lips, It's in the spaces following these next heartbeats, And we can summon ourselves back home. Back to center. Here I am. We breathe. Here I am. Here. Here is to become aware of this present moment, Not any other. Simply this space and this time, Right now, Right here. Here I am. I is to become aware of the one within. The one with the power to make choices, To hurt and to heal. The eye that is full of wonder and fear and dreams. And deeper still, The eye that has lovingly witnessed you your entire life. Here I am. Am is to become aware of your fundamental state of being. That you are a glorious expression of existence personified. That you can let go of your incessant doing and chasing and still be wonderfully whole. Here I am. In the Torah of the Hebrew Scriptures, As well as the Christian Old Testament, The name of God is described as simply, I am. It's so peculiar that the Divine, The Cosmic, Would invite humanity to call upon it as, I am. It's strange and beautiful that the name of God would require its speakers to merge with the Divine as they call out. And so odd that the Infinite, The Eternal, The loving source that holds all things together across the cosmos, Is also present and personal and intimately here. Here I am. Here I am. Now turning towards your breath, Simply notice it. Breathing is uniquely something that just happens without conscious effort. And yet we can also consciously guide. Breathing is the bridge between our voluntary and involuntary systems. Our mind and our body. And through the breath we can connect to parts of ourselves we can't typically access. Notice your breath and the places it reaches within yourself. Notice how often you're merely taking small sips of air and what it's like to drink deeply of the life and love that's all around us. I invite you to place one hand over your chest and your other hand over your belly. And become conscious of three distinct parts of the breath. One, As you inhale, Feel the breath drawing down towards your stomach and feel the rising of your belly. Notice its movements as it rises and falls. Notice that place of deep knowing. The intuition within your belly. The often hushed instincts within your gut. Breathing with awareness into your belly. Second, As you inhale ever more deeply, Become conscious of the expansion of your chest. The way your rib cage creaks open, The spaciousness that's made. Notice how your heart center is activated and energized with each conscious breath flowing through your chest. And how your heart waits for you. Breathing with awareness into your belly and expanding through your chest. Third, As you exhale, Notice the physical release. The air moving out through your nostrils or your lips. Notice the subtle waves you're exchanging air, Interacting with the world, Even as you simply breathe. Allow those tightly held and stiff parts of yourself to soften. Let that wound up energy be carried through your breath and dissipate. Breathing with awareness. So one drawing down to the belly. Two, Expanding through your chest and heart. And three, Exhaling and releasing. Notice the distinct yet interconnected parts of your breath. Notice the way it subtly moves your hands that rest upon your body. Notice the rising and falling of tides within yourself. Notice your body and its natural rhythms. And as your breath sweeps over you, Notice your own tenderness. Breathing through the belly, Expanding through the chest, And exhaling as you release. Now we'll shift to incorporating the three words of the mantra, Here, I, Am, With the three parts of the breath. Whispering here, I, Am, Within your consciousness. So breathing deeply into your belly here, Expanding through your chest, I, And exhaling the word am. Again breathing deeply into your belly, The ground of your being here, Expanding through your chest, Your heart center, I, And exhaling your presence in the world, Am. Here I am. As you connect each part of the phrase to your body, Sink deeper into yourself. Here I am. Collect and reclaim all those far flung parts of yourself. Here I am. Notice how those parts you thought were lost, The parts that matter, Still remain. Now everything you need in this moment is right here. Here I am. Fully inhabit yourself. Here I am. Notice how much larger you are, How much more space there is within as each muscle and fiber loosens. Here I am. Sense the infinite, Even in these finite, Fleeting moments. Here I am. Now allowing yourself to breathe naturally or however you wish, Notice. Here I am breathing. Here I am rooted. Here I am whole. Here I am alive. And as you transition back into your day, Here you are. Here you are in all of your broken glory. Here you are present to the wonder of the life before you. Here you are, If anything, As one who's learning to come back to center. And as you go, In all of your fullness, Remember, You can always return to your breath and body and being and find your way back to yourself.