The Ongoing Practice Of Letting Go

Part of mindfulness practice, is not just about being present for things, seeing and being mindful but it's really a means to have the deepest and fullest experience of letting go. Our path is to learn something about all the different forms of letting go that a person can have. From the simplest to the profound.

Transcript

So the theme for this week is letting go and I use that term as an umbrella term from the simple movement of the relaxation of the body, Releasing tension to the complete cessation of suffering. That's the spectrum. That's said to be the end of this Buddhist path. So everything from just relaxing the body to full release of suffering and everything in between. And in one way this whole path is to bring things to an end and the thing that we're trying to bring to an end is our suffering, Right? The way in which we suffer because of our holding on. We cling to our life. We resist. There's some kind of inner compulsive behavior, You know, Driven behavior to hold on. Kind of tells us that we have a lot of authority over our life and it might be there for a good reason, You know, But with practice our authority kind of limits us. It diminishes us. It doesn't really allow for the full flowering of our hearts. So part of this mindfulness practice is not just being present for things and seeing and being a little calmer and less reactive, Although those things certainly happen. It's really meant to have a deeper and fuller experience of letting go. Letting go. So our path is to learn something about all of the different forms of letting go and it's a pretty ordinary activity when you think about it. We do a lot of letting go throughout the day and it doesn't, You know, If you reflect for a few moments, You know, It doesn't take much to realize that we're often letting go of things. It's so automatic that we don't even realize that we're letting go. Maybe you woke up this morning and had, You expected to have fruit and granola for breakfast, You know, And you open the fridge and there's absolutely no fruit in the fridge. And so, Okay, That's what I wanted but it's not there so, You know what, I'll just have the cereal instead. And in that moment there's a kind of letting go. The desire is, Okay, Well I'll have to just go and get fruit later. We let go of it. And you can also feel physiologically, You know, Sometimes the difference between holding on and wanting something and letting go and settling back. A simple way to play with this is if you're sitting in traffic or at a stoplight. You know, We can sit there and we can take a few breaths and we can rest but as we wait and it gets closer to when we think the light is going to turn green, You can actually feel physiologically sort of the tension, You know, Our foot is readied, Our hands are tighter on the steering wheel, There's an anticipation to push the gas pedal. And as soon as it's green, Because we have somewhere to get to, We don't even think about any of that. We just push the gas and go. But it's interesting to just watch this play of picking up and letting be and putting down and letting go. It's really part of our everyday experience. And so one of the things that we can start to pay attention to is this letting go. To become mindful of it so that it doesn't have to be this thing that we do outside of us, Like it's such a big deal to let it go. I need to let it go. There's this whole story about letting go. Just start to notice when we let go of something. It can be as simple as becoming aware of, You know, All the ordinary ways that we let go. And that actually builds momentum and familiarity. We want to become familiar with the workings of letting go. How it works in our body and mind. The emotions around it. You know, Where it's easy and where it's a little bit more difficult. I recently broke a cup that I really liked. It just slipped out of my hand in the sink when I was washing it. There was a moment, You know, Like my shoulders kind of went up. I felt tight. There was a tightness in my chest. And then I just looked at the cup and picked up the pieces and it's like everything changes. Put it in the compost. Gone. Let go. Sometimes it happens quickly like that and sometimes it doesn't happen as quickly. But start to like getting to know it. Getting to know it and seeing the ordinary way of it. So that when something more challenging arises, We've actually built up the muscle of familiarity. The understanding of a letting go. Just that word letting. You know, Letting is a powerful way of meeting the world. Letting. When you think about that. Respecting the way things are. Letting doesn't hold. It's not clinging. It's not wanting. It's not pushing away. It's just letting. Oh, Like this is how it is. Okay, Let me just watch this now. And watching something with your mind's eye has a really powerful effect. It's kind of like watching the sun shining on a young plant in your garden. You know, The sun allows it to grow. And so when we watch what's happening in the mind, It's letting be. Watching is like the sun on things. And things that are unwise, You know, Where there's clinging, We can see that and not get so invested in it when we watch. Like, Oh, Here's some holding on. Oh, Look at that. Let me just ride this. Not do anything with it. And those things that are wise, We sort of bask in the sun of awareness. So this capacity to let something be. It's like sitting still, You know, What we do here. But as we go about our day, It's more like a metaphorical stillness. We have this ability to be present with whatever's happening. With this sort of, You know, I see you quality to it. I see you I see what this is in the moment. It's just a thought, You know, Or it could be somebody's angry at me in this moment. And then that's like, Oh, What am I? How am I responding? Oh, It's some fear that I'm responding with. It's just a whatever it is, Fill in the blank. This word just also, You know, It's just also very helpful. Because then we're not giving it power in the way that we often do. So there's something powerful that begins to happen with this letting. We are no longer the agent of change. You know, Just letting things be and allowing change to happen. When we allow for letting go, A release happens. The deepest, Fullest kind of letting go that can happen in this Buddhist practice is not something that we do. It's something that happens on its own, When we really learn the full maturity of letting things be. So those are some reflections on, On this press, This practice of letting. I'll be curious to hear your experience. Thank you for your kind attention.