Hi.
It's strange,
Isn't it?
How you can know someone so well.
And then one day,
You're simply not part of each other's lives anymore.
You knew how they liked their coffee.
You knew the stories they'd already told a hundred times.
You knew the small change in their voice when something was wrong.
You knew what would make them laugh.
What would annoy them.
What they worried about.
Maybe you knew what they looked like first thing in the morning.
Maybe you knew the names of people you'd never even met,
Simply because you'd heard so many stories about them.
And their new things about you too.
Your routines.
Your history.
The things you didn't tell everyone.
For a while,
There was this whole little world where the two of you knew each other.
And now.
You're somehow supposed to become strangers again.
That's such a strange thing to ask of a person.
Because you don't suddenly stop knowing someone just because the relationship ends.
You still know them.
You just don't have access to them anymore.
You might see something and immediately know what they would say about it.
A song comes on.
Something happens at work.
You heard a joke they would have loved.
And for a split second.
Your mind still goes to them.
Maybe your hand even reaches for your phone.
And then you remember.
I don't tell you things anymore.
That moment can hurt in a very particular way.
Because it's not always about wanting the relationship back.
Sometimes you know why it ended.
Sometimes you know that it needed to end.
Sometimes you wouldn't go back,
Even if you had the chance.
And still.
It's strange.
To know so much about someone who is no longer part of your days.
To wonder how they're doing and know that it's no longer your place to ask.
To remember their birthday.
The favourite food.
The thing they were worried about the last time you spoke.
And then life just carries on.
Yours over here There's somewhere else.
Maybe that's one of the hardest things about losing a relationship.
There isn't a button inside us that says,
This person is gone now.
Please delete everything I know about them.
Our minds don't work like that.
Our hearts don't work like that.
People leave traces,
Little pieces of knowledge.
Habits,
Associations.
Ways of seeing things.
And for a while you keep bumping into them.
And songs.
In places.
In ordinary Tuesday afternoons when you suddenly remember something they once said.
If this is where you are right now.
I don't think you need to force yourself to stop thinking about them.
And you don't need to turn every memory into a sign that you should reach out.
A memory can simply be a memory.
A person kind of mattered.
And still not belong in your life anymore.
Both things can be true.
Maybe they knew a version of you that no one else quite knew.
Maybe a newer version of them that you'll always remember.
That happened.
It was real.
You don't have to pretend you were strangers just because you've become strangers now.
Take a slow breath in.
And let it go.
There's something deeply human about remembering people.
About carrying small pieces of them with us long after the relationship has changed.
It doesn't mean you're stuck.
It doesn't mean you're going backwards.
Sometimes it simply means you knew someone.
And they knew you.
For a while,
Your lives match.
And now they don't.
I know that can feel strange.
Maybe it always will,
A little.
But you don't have to erase someone in order to keep moving.
You don't have to unknow them.
You can simply let what you knew become part of your past.
Something you once held close.
Something that mattered.
And something you no longer need to reach for.
For now.
Just stay here for a moment Take one more slow breath.
You don't need to do anything with the memories tonight.
You don't need to send the message.
You don't need to find out how they're doing.
You can remember someone.
And stay right here in your own life.
I'm here with you for a little while longer.
You're okay.
Take care.
