Day 360/365: Guided Meditation | Ajahn Brahm

Ajahn Brahm delivers 15 minutes of dharma talk/meditation advice and inspiration, followed by 45 minutes of semi-guided meditation (about 20 minutes guided meditation and about 25 minutes of silent meditation). After the meditation practice, there is a Q&A session and closing thoughts.

In this session, Ajahn Brahm explores the emotional entanglement in everyday situations.

Transcript

Okay, I think my clock has the three o'clock now. So again welcome to our meditation class, Weekly meditation class here. For those who have meditated before, We call the ongoing class. And today that to emphasize obviously that something in meditation called awareness, Mindfulness is an important part which gives you a sense of understanding some control over what's going on in your mind. This is if once you are looking at the right areas when you are meditating, You have an opportunity to direct your mind. Just like if you're driving a car, If your windscreen is all dirty or if it's raining and you know the heavily and the windscreen wipers aren't working that well, Sometimes it's difficult to know exactly where you're going. Or even a better example is where I grew up over in London in the 50s, Used to have this smog where you couldn't really see in front of your hand. And being a young kid in primary school, I remember just getting the soccer ball, We were playing soccer and of course all the other people on my team and the opposition couldn't find me because I was hidden in the smog and I kept going goal after goal after goal after goal until I realized I was the only person who could see me scoring the goals. No one else could, So what a waste of time that was. But in the midst and in the smog, You can't see where you're going. You don't know what's happening. And that's like a state of low mindfulness where you're aware, Sort of, But you're not really understanding where you are, Which way you should be going. So that quality of mindfulness is important, But there's almost like a catch-22 here. That if you aren't mindful, You don't really know you're not mindful and you don't know which way to go to be mindful. So once you are mindful, Then meditation is very easy. You can see all the little mistakes which the mind makes and you can correct them in plenty of time. It's like the windscreen is clear so you can actually see any obstacles on the path. You know which way to turn and you know how to avoid all the obstacles on the road. So it's just getting to that mindfulness first of all, To be able to be aware of how the mind is working is important. And for that, The opposite of that is sometimes we just get sucked into things. I'm always sucked into things, Especially some of the thinking, Some of the past, Some of the future, Some of that emotional world. That does create a lot of not really knowing what we're doing, Where we're going and it may be fascinating for a little while, But it tires you out. So there was a simile which I remember using a long time ago and that was a simile of watching the TV screen and getting sucked into it emotionally. And where I saw that first of all was on the travels on the airport terminals and just watching people, Especially at the Singapore Airport Terminal 3, Which I usually pass through very often, And there to see that people were looking at a football match or some sports match on this big, I think they even called it the sports lounge in the middle of Terminal 3. And all these guys getting so excited at what they were seeing on the screen, Some of them getting out of their seats and shouting at the ref, That was not a foul, That should have been a penalty. And they were watching it on a screen in Singapore while the match was being played in Manchester and it was a replay anyway. And all that shouting, All of those words which were being shouted at the screen obviously had no meaning at all. The match was over. So why do people, When they're watching a movie like that or a sports match like that, Why do you get sucked in to the action? What is the psychology of even like someone in Perth crying when there is a movie which was shot in Hollywood and when it wasn't real anyway, It's just actors playing. Why do we get emotionally entangled? And it became sort of quite obvious that for those people watching a football match in Singapore, Which had happened in UK maybe 24 hours earlier, The experience of watching it on a big screen was they were getting sucked into it as if they were in that stadium watching the action live. There was no other explanation why they were shouting so loud at the referee or the person, The player. It's the same way when a person gets emotionally involved in watching a movie here in Perth and it's something which was only a fantasy anyway. Why you get sucked in as if you're really on the set? And I still recall as a student going with some of my mates just to see, Supposed to be a horror movie at the time. It was just so poorly made but nevertheless it's the best you could get and it was called Tarantula, A spider which had been involved in a nuclear accident and was ten times the size of a normal tarantula and was eating everybody, Creeping up on behind them. And in the audience, I remember just one of the students was so involved in the movie that they shouted out from the seats, Hey look out behind you, Tarantula, As if you could give somebody a warning and of course it was only a movie. And just because you're sitting in the seats, No matter how much you shout, The person in the movie can't hear obviously. But this is what we do with the stuff going on in our head. It's as if that passed, That we can somehow do something about it, That we can think, Analyze and as if we're like being drawn and entangled back in those actions of the past, To think we could fix them or the fantasies for the future. Again we get drawn in there as actually we're in that action. That's where we lose our mindfulness. So the antidote to that is whatever you're experiencing in your meditation, Especially the early stages of meditation, Just change the way you look at these things as if what you're experiencing is out here. And you, The experiencer, Is actually maybe a foot, 12 inches away from it, Looking at a distance. You're not entangled in it, You can see it with some distance, You're not right inside of it. Then way, Then because you're not so entangled and involved in it, It's easy actually to see that this is the past, This is the future, This is not going to lead anywhere. You can actually see just what you're doing. That is a decent description of how mindfulness can actually stop getting you entangled and involved in some of these thinking, This use of thoughts, Which can carry on for such and such and such a long time and waste the time of your meditation. So sometimes in your meditation, If it's not getting peaceful, There's too many thoughts and activities going on in your head, See if you can just imagine yourself standing above your mind and looking down or just standing apart from it and looking from a distance, Not getting so close to it, You get caught up in the fantasies and the emotions which aren't really deserved of that experience. When you take off the emotional content of those thoughts, Fantasies, When you don't give them importance, You see them for what they are, Sometimes what happens when people watch a movie or thought, Don't interfere me, Don't interfere, It's just about to finish, The world's about to end. Of course the world doesn't end, It's only a movie, But nevertheless we get so entangled into it that it becomes more important than reality. The cricket match has to be seen and you can't be disturbed until you get to the final over and find the outcome. It doesn't matter, You can catch that later on if you want to, But really sometimes the fantasies become more important than reality. So be able to distance yourself from these things, Put a space between you, The observer, And what you're being, What you're watching, Is a beautiful way, An effective way of not getting entangled in the thoughts and the feelings. You also notice that of course when you can watch at a distance, You notice anything which is an ache or a pain, A disappointment, Or even a joy, They don't last anyway. When you're out from these states, You become more detached from what's happening and you can get a much better view of the reality which is happening in your mind. And an example of that was when somebody asked me yesterday, They had a problem with almost like a sleepiness. The problem was that sleepiness at work. Fortunately they weren't in a difficult position, They weren't like a bus driver or anything. I wouldn't like to be on a bus where there's a bus driver who falls asleep at any time. But nevertheless, They were still making a difficulty for his work. And that there was one example, A wonderful strategy which he could use to be able to when a person has that really strong Goit-Sloth-Torpor, The dullness, The sleepiness in the mind, To actually to see if you can catch it earlier, To stand back, Have an overview of it, Be like a supervisor rather involved in the action of this process of going to sleep and seeing it from a distance. And usually what one can notice is that the path the mind is taking is there is a fork in the road. As you're going towards sleepiness, There's a well-worn path of the easy path, At least it sounds easy or feels easy at the time, Of going towards dullness and sleepiness where everything gets very dull but at least you don't need any effort and you don't feel any tightness or tension there. It's not the best way to overcome tension, Tightness in meditation but it's a well-worn path. But you do see, If you can just stand back and get almost like a bird's eye view of what's happening, That there is another path. There's a fork in the road, In fact several forks in the road. And you can turn off that well-worn path and keep the stillness, Keep the peace but also keep the mindfulness as well so you don't fall asleep. And if you are aware of the whole process you can see that actually happening. You have to be standing back a little bit, Seeing from a distance, Not so entangled in the action to be able to observe this. And if it's that sleepiness or that excess thoughts which are the problem in one's meditation, Usually it's both, That the skillful means is just to focus on one of those things and make sure at the very beginning of your meditation that that is an important thing you have to watch out for. If you're driving home after this meditation and you've only got a few or one or two points left on your driving license, Of course you'll be very careful of pre-speed cameras because one more speeding fine and that's it for six months. So you're very aware of the dangers. If something is considered to be a very dangerous obstacle of course your mindfulness will be set up to notice that. I used to call that my simile of the snake because living in Thailand where there were many snakes and at the time, Just to make a point, They said there was hundred species of snake in that part of Thailand where I was living. Ninety-nine of those species were deadly and the other one which wasn't deadly was a python which would strangle you to death. In other words, They were all going to kill you. So it was a bit of an exaggeration but it really made me alert to the presence of snakes, Especially on the path at night when the light wasn't so good. So because I knew the snakes were there, I knew that they were dangerous, I was really aware of snakes. So aware that if I saw a shadow on the path, I would usually jump over it or find another way. It was because I knew the danger, I set my mind up to be on the lookout for snakes and of course that's why you never trod on them. Actually I did tread on one once but that was not my fault, It was a snake's fault. It was actually just in that blind spot when you open the door, Just to the bottom and as I opened the door, I just looked about a foot on the other side, I couldn't see the snake. So I trod on the snake, The snake jumped and I jumped, Fortunately we jumped in different directions. So we're both safe. So anyway, The simile of the snake means when you're meditating, If you may have a problem which you have in your meditation, Such as sleepiness or excessive thinking, Just choose one of them, That's your snake for this meditation, For this session. So you set yourself up, I'm going to be on the lookout for this, I'm going to be sort of aware of this, This is my biggest danger in this meditation, So I set myself up, Look out, Be on the lookout for these things. So when I set my mindfulness up to look out for those dangers, I find that I'm meditating along and of course you see something, So your mindfulness stands back, Sees what's really going on and the alertness increases when it knows what to focus on. Focus on the beginnings of sleepiness. Focus is on the path which leads to excessive thoughts and silly things. And once you set yourself up that way, You program your mindfulness to be on the lookout for those dangers, Then you don't get caught. You go past those dangers. So the thinking mind, Which is a lot of waste of time, Is actually surpassed. You find some peace. The sleepiness, You don't go along that path, So you're alert. And then your mindfulness quite naturally increases and increases and increases. The longer you can sit with a mind which is not indulging in thoughts or sleepiness, The longer you can sit there, The mindfulness increases minute by minute by minute. And once the mindfulness gets to a state where you are pretty clear, You can see what the mind is doing, Then you can see some of those more refined obstacles and they're pretty easy to get past. It's those big ones of restless thinking and sleepiness, Sloth and torpor. They're the main ones at the beginning to try and surpass, Go past by not getting entangled into things. That's with the thinking. And also just being a little bit alert, The sleepiness, Taking the easy path, The dull path, Maybe just a habit which can be easily overcome as long as you look out for that at the beginning. Okay, So that's a little bit of technique advice for the beginning of the meditation. Now if you'd like to get yourself in a reasonably comfortable posture, Then we can begin the meditation. And I said in a reasonably comfortable position because you think it's comfortable to begin with, But that becomes the first task for my mindfulness and my wisdom, Compassion, To actually refine the comfort of my posture when I'm meditating. Too often if you don't get comfortable, You miss the first five minutes of meditation because you're dealing with aches and pains. That first five minutes of meditation when you can start to build up awareness and kindness and stillness, That can become so important because once those qualities are established, The rest of the meditation is just so much fun. So you get it right at the beginning. So with my eyes closed so I can look inside rather than just being taken outside all the time with sights. I can look inside, Be with my body first of all. And I look at every part of my body like an independent being, Just like you may have a cat or a dog and then you ask them, How are you? Have a good friend. How are you doing? Today my good friend I start with is my legs. Legs, How are you down there? How have I put you in a good position, A comfortable position? And when you inquire about a part of the body, It's like you are putting your mindfulness down there, Getting information back once you send the request to find out how are you. Same thing which a doctor does, How is your legs today? How is your heart? And now we send it to the part of our own body. To me I begin with my legs. Are you well-crossed on the cushion? I listen for that answer and if I find that I can make them even more comfortable I don't hesitate to adjust my legs. If you are in a chair, Just focus on your legs. Are they comfortable on your feet? Are they flat on the floor? Heels down or the heels up? Find the best position for your legs. It's not a waste of time because you are also developing your awareness and your response of kindness to what you experience. It's not even the comfort of the legs which is the only purpose of this. It's also the focusing and reinforcing the growing of awareness and kindness, Working together. And once I feel that my legs are comfortable enough and I go to my buttocks. Ask my buttocks, Are you well positioned on the cushion, On the saffron, On the stool, On the chair? If you need to fidget, Fidget now, I tell my buttocks. And once I'm confident that that part of my body has been dealt with, I go to my back, Experiencing sensations in my back, Especially understanding or asking, Are you comfortable? The comfortable index on my back. And if I need to adjust the back, Of course I do it straight away. I move it this way and that way until my back feels in its best position I can possibly make it in these circumstances of now. In a moment I'm just feeling aware of just that part of my body, The back, And I'm caring for it. It's amazing just when you start to focus on a part of the body, How many sensations you can pick up. And some may be only a little irritation now, But I know if I don't relax that part of the body or adjust my position, That that little irritation will go into an ache or a pain even and disturb my meditation later on. So I take this seriously, Relaxing my own body, By being aware and being kind to it. And then I go to my shoulders, Making sure that those are relaxed and at ease. And go down my arms to my hands. I usually just, Because this is just how I was taught and my hands got used to this, So just having my right hand over my left hand with the thumbs touching. Most of the time I do that, Sometimes my body says, You need to do something else. You find, You find the optimum posture for your own hands. Are you aware of them now? Do they feel okay? Do you need to adjust? And I go up to my shoulders, Once my hands are dealt with, Down my shoulders and my neck. Making sure the neck is balanced on top of the, So the head is well balanced on top of the neck, So there's not too much tightness and tension. If my head is too far forward, Of course that would create a pain and tension in the neck. If it's too far up, It forms another pain. I'm willing to experiment moving my head left to right, Back and forth, Until I can feel, Yeah, There it is, That's the best position. Because your mindfulness offers you this feedback, And the feedback is where you can find the best position. And then I go up to my head, So around the eyes and the mouth, Any tightness, Tension there, I can feel it. The mindfulness knows this, The sensations which shows that there's some tightness there, And the sensations which I recognize as relaxed. And I know just how, Just through a little instruction to relax all those muscles on my face. Because when I relax the muscles around my eyes and mouth, I'm also just easing off the emotions, The emotions of fear or control or tightness, Anger, Whatever, All those feelings which manifests themselves on the face. And I'm relaxing the emotions when I relax those muscles. Until when my face feels at ease, Then I look at my whole body, Relaxed as best I can. When I've relaxed it this way, It always feels delightful. I'm grateful that right now my body is in a pretty comfortable position. I'm grateful because it's not going to disturb me so much in the next 35 minutes of this meditation. And noticing the delight of relaxation makes me more relaxed. And then I go into my emotional world, And by asking myself about the peace-ometer. How peaceful am I now? The thermometer tells you what the room temperature is, Speedometer, How far you're speeding, This is the peace-ometer. How relaxed is your mind? How peaceful is it? Or how agitated, How worried is it? A number from 1 to 10, 1 means really peaceful, 10 means agitated. This again is a skillful means, So you can be aware of how peaceful you are and also the feedback from your mindfulness, What makes your mind more peaceful? What makes them more agitated? A lot of times when we react, Respond, Aggressively, Negatively to anything we're aware of, It just makes that reading of the peace-ometer go up. You allow yourself to get disturbed. When you let go of the fault-finding mind, When you're just happy to be here, When you're not measuring or critical, You're just here, Opening the door of your heart to this moment. You find you become still, You become peaceful. And I encourage you not to leave this part of the meditation practice, The awareness of your peace-ometer, Until you're peaceful enough to notice the delight of peace. How peace feels to be such a pleasurable emotion. Once I notice the delight of peace, The peace gets deeper. Now just stay with that peace a minute or two more. And if you find yourself getting sleepy, Just imagine yourself standing back a little bit from the action, Getting a perspective, Detaching slightly so you're overlooking what's going on. It gives you a different perspective when you're not right in the middle of the action, Where you're standing back from it, Just watching the peace, The delight of the peace and where it leads. It's like you remind yourself you're in a seat in the cinema, In the scene being enacted on the screen. You're not playing on the field of the match. You're sitting a thousand miles away watching the recording. And you're not entangled in the action. It's easy to be peaceful. And if you have an obstacle which keeps coming back, Whether sleepiness or boredom-produced thinking, Be on the lookout for that. It's like a snake on the path. When you remind yourself of its danger, It's less, Less, Less likely that you will get caught up in that. You may start watching the breath if you wish. But I'm going to be quiet now, Having begun the meditation with guidance. So I am going to be quiet. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . How peaceful is the mind? And how relaxed the body? How relaxed the body? Why? What causes the mind to be peaceful? What causes the body to be relaxed? What causes the mind to be peaceful? What causes the mind to be peaceful? It's almost like the last minute or two of the meditation is like a debriefing. Figuring out the wisdom which you've learnt, What works, What doesn't work, From this previous 45 minutes of meditation. So now, Ring the gong three times. Ring the gong, Finish this sounding for the third time. This is the signal to come out from your meditation. There he goes. Excellent. Excellent. So now we usually have question time. So first of all some questions from overseas, From Sydney, From nowhere and from nowhere. First of all from Sydney, I meditate to relax both body and mind and to do metta. But I mostly contemplate the dharma during the non-meditative routines of everyday life. Am I doing it right? The idea of contemplating dharma, Too often that's like thinking about it. I explore, I prefer the word to explore the dharma. In other words, Just like you're going into uncharted territory, Places you've never been before. And really finding out what it truly means. And to have, To know that you have to have a quite still mind. I've done this so many times here, What I mean by so called contemplating exploring the dharma. I hold up something, Something ordinary and ask people what is this I'm holding up? And people would say a piece of wood, A stick, Maybe nine inches long or whatever. Keep on looking, Because what happens when people do contemplating thinking? They give it a name, They think they've understood it, They've dealt with it, They don't look any further. When it's exercise, What is this I'm holding up? Keep on looking. Keep on looking, Keep on looking. Until that you have run out of descriptions, When you've run out of descriptions of what this is, Then you can start to see it. So that's one of the reasons why you do need stillness. You do need strong mindfulness. You have to take an object and actually stay with it. A good example of that which I meant to talk about at the recent retreat, I never got round to it, Haven't said this for a long time, It's in part of the suttas. Mentioned, In brief, Explained fully in the commentary, Of the two messengers. And so it was an emperor, This is just the way they used to speak in those days, The metaphors which were common. An emperor had a son, And in order to teach the son about how to run an empire or even a little country, He sent his son to one of the out-lowering regions of the empire and just gave him autonomy to say, You know, Just learn by your mistakes, You can't do too much wrong there, Because it's only a small region of the vast empire, But you have full control over there, Just try out, Just being a leader, Being a manager of a country. So off the prince went, But this was the first time the prince was away from home, Outside of his father's control, So he started having parties and messing around, Like young people do when they first go to university and leave home. So messing around and of course, Some of the leaders of that country came and reported to the emperor, Your son is messing about, He's not doing any work at all, He's just enjoying himself. So the emperor sent his wise minister to go and teach his son just how to run an empire, It's okay to have fun, But you know, Just do some work as well. So the wise minister went and told the son, This is how to run an empire, You can have your parties and celebrations, But do work as well. And the son told the minister, Who are you to tell me? This is my place, Get lost. I come from your father, The emperor, I don't care who you came from, Nick off. And so the son was very disrespectful to the minister, So the minister went back, Told the emperor, The emperor said, Oh yes, So it's my mistake. Now send one of my battle hardened generals with you. And so the two returned to the son. And he told the son, Now, Said the minister, I'll send here again the second time by your father to teach you how to run a little country, Preparation for being an emperor later on. I told you already, Said the son, This is my place, Get out of here. And at that the general took out his sword. And he held the son by the hair, The sword to the throat, I don't care who you are, I'm a big general, You better listen to the minister. And with the sword on his throat, The son said, I'm listening, I'm listening. And that allowed the minister to teach the son how to run an empire, With the general holding him still so he could listen. And those two messengers, That was a metaphor used by the Buddha, Asamatthu ipasana. The stillness allows you to listen to the teachings which the world is always offering you. But without that stillness, You just can't hear. So that's one of the reasons, That was a beautiful simile. Okay, It's a bit violent, The general with the sword, But you know, You can get the message here, You need something to keep your mind really still so you can listen to new information. That's the job of meditation. The other question, I've practiced this done, I have practiced dhamma since October last year. I gained some concentration while meditating, But my temper doesn't change much. How do I know if I'm on the right path? If your temper doesn't change very much, You're not on the right path, Period. Concentration, Make it stillness, Not concentration. Have it coming from a space of letting go, Not trying to attain things. If your whole path is about getting somewhere, You're missing out. There's something which is the second factor of the Eightfold Path, This all comes together, This is a path of Buddhism, Meditation, Dhamma. Second part of the Eightfold Path, Right Motivation. If you want to hear more about that, Suta class tomorrow, 3pm. Right Motivation, Samosanka, Per the three Right Motivations, Letting go, Renunciation, Giving up, Not trying to get somewhere, But letting go, Kindness and gentleness. So if you're not coming from those three places, Not trying to obtain things, But trying to let things go. See how less you have, Not more attainments, But more peace, Kindness and gentleness, Then that's on the right path. How to deal with nervous people in daily life? The effect now is on me, They drag me into their anxiety because I'm sensitive myself, Or too empathetic, This upsets me. So when you're talking to somebody, Always remember, I think this may be the third time I've said this on this, So we can, Always remember to be the dustbin, The trash can. So they can actually pour their anxiety into you, They can pour their worries, Their troubles, Their pain and their disappointments and all the frustrations and suffering of their life into you. That's being a good friend. But, As Ajahn Chah said, You have to be a trash can with a hole in the bottom. So whatever anxiety, Whatever nervousness, Whatever problems they pour into you, You accept it all, You're never too full to actually accept some more. But when you get up from your seat and go home or go whatever, It all disappears, You never take anything with you. You're a trash can with a hole in the bottom. So that's a nice little way. You deal with nervous people in daily life, Yeah just empathize with them, But once they're gone, Then their nervousness and anxiety should also be gone. You don't keep it, You let it go. It's not hard to do that. Otherwise, You are a waste of time to other people and a waste of time to yourself. You get nervous. So inoculate yourself with present moment awareness and letting go. Then it's not contagious. Any questions from here, From the floor? For the second time, Any questions from the floor? From the third time, And now sees another use of this, Gone. Gone. Like in an auction. So now we can pay this fix. You see, If you always think this is a gong bonger and not an auction decider, Then you can't use it for innovative purposes. So now we can pay respects to the Buddha and do what we need to do. By the way, Who found this hall warm this afternoon? Really hot? Yeah. Okay. Stuffy, Warm, Yeah. We got these air conditioners there which we paid a lot of money for, But we just look at them. So, Don't worry about it. So, Dhammaloka building subcommittee, Maintenance, Whatever. Can we find out where the thing is for the air conditioners so we can actually put them on? Yes. Yeah, You can. Yes, I agree with you. You're very wise. Thank you.