Glimmers - Letting The Light In

Leonard Cohen once wrote 'so much of the world is plunged in darkness and chaos… So ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.' This talk explores light. Real and metaphorical. We explore the importance of light for our emotional and physical well-being, the power of glimmers as tiny moments of joy (the opposite of triggers), and the neuroplasticity of the brain.

When we care for our whole being - body, mind, spirit - when we let the light in - then we are better able to live well, and to care with compassion for the world around us, and the people around us too.

Transcript

Leonard Cohen once wrote,

So much of the world is plunged in darkness and chaos,

So ring the bells that still can ring,

Forget your perfect offering,

There is a crack in everything,

That's how the light gets in.

Today I'd like to talk about how we let the light in and to explore the idea of glimmers.

Welcome to the Henny Flynn podcast,

The space for deepening self-awareness with profound self-compassion.

I'm Henny,

I write,

Coach and speak about how exploring our inner world can transform how we experience our outer world,

All founded on a bedrock of self-love.

Settle in and listen and see where the episode takes you.

So to follow on from that beautiful Leonard Cohen line about how the light gets in,

Martin Luther King Junior said,

Darkness cannot drive out darkness,

Only light can do that.

Hate cannot drive out hate,

Only love can do that.

My friend Abbey Lathe and if you've been with me for a while I'm sure you'll have come across Abbey at some retreat or event,

She sings the line,

You can let the light in.

Every year in Hay-on-Wye,

Near where we live,

There is a festival,

It's called How the Light Gets In,

A celebration of philosophy,

Music and big ideas.

Dr Andrew Huberman,

Who you might be familiar with,

He has a fantastic podcast about neuroscience and is a prolific speaker so if you get the chance to listen to any of his stuff I highly recommend it.

He and countless other neuro and nutritional researchers tell us that sunlight reaching our eyes each morning is vital for our wellbeing,

Not only for vitamin D and our mood but it also triggers a neural circuit that controls the timing of the hormones cortisol and melatonin which affect our sleep and how we wake.

So light,

Actual and metaphorical,

Is vital for our wellbeing physical,

Mental,

Emotional,

Spiritual.

We all know this,

It's all written in our DNA,

But how do we let the light in when the world feels dark?

As part of his research into polyvagal theory,

Behavioural neuroscientist Stephen Porges introduced the concept of how our autonomic nervous system,

The part which controls involuntary actions like breathing and digestion,

Is constantly searching for and reading cues to determine if they are dangerous or safe.

This process is called neuroception and the vagus nerve which regulates organ functions is responsible for it.

The term glimmer was then coined by clinical social worker and psychotherapist Deb Dann in her book The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy,

Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation.

She says that glimmers are tiny micro-moments of joy that allow us to feel calm and give us a sense of inner peace.

They're the opposite of triggers,

Which are perhaps something we're more familiar with it's something that often gets talked about and it's become part of our day-to-day lexicon,

You know,

That's triggered me,

Is a phrase that many of us will have said at some point.

But glimmers are these small moments when our biology is in a place of connection or regulation which cues our nervous system to feel safe or calm.

So going back to that work of Stephen Porger's it's how our central nervous system reads the cues that are being presented to us in our external world and tells us whether we are okay or whether we are in danger.

Marielle Bouquet,

I really hope I'm saying her surname right it's B-U-Q-U-E not as in Mrs.

Bouquet if anyone remembers that TV series.

So Marielle Bouquet who's a PhD researcher and a trauma therapist says that while glimmers can ease our minds in the moment they also can help us develop a less overactive nervous system in the long term while also helping us to develop neural connections that are programmed for rest and ease she says.

Our brains are flexible malleable and neuroplastic and our nervous systems can be reprogrammed.

Glimmers can help us make small changes in both so in both our neural connections and in our nervous system.

And so we see the power of metaphorical light here too.

Tiny glimmers show us we are safe.

This topic feels particularly resonant right now.

There are a lot of fears flowing around us fears that are finding lots of evidence for themselves to exist.

And the challenge is that when our system is highly activated it can get to a point where all we can see are the triggers and so learning how to see the glimmers is part of how we reprogram ourselves back into a state of rest and repair.

And I'm not saying that this is easy by the way because it can feel very attractive to stay in that familiar place of activation.

So sometimes it can actually be the work with a capital W to refocus our attention on the tiny moments of joy as Deb Dan calls them and guide ourselves back into a place where we are better regulated,

Where our nervous system is calmer,

Where our whole body can come into a place of rest.

The really important thing here is that when our central nervous system and our autonomic nervous system is in this state of rest and repair our brains actually function much better too.

We think more clearly,

We're much more creative we're better problem solvers and we're better able to process the information that we are constantly receiving all the time.

So we each have our own glimmers,

Though some of them could be seen as universal.

You know a handful of things might be feeling the warmth of the sun on our skin,

Watching leaves move on trees,

I particularly love that watching them from a distance where it looks like the whole of the canopy of the tree is alive as it moves in the breeze.

Seeing a rainbow,

Always a moment of joy,

Sunlight sparkling on water.

Something I saw this morning when I was returning home from a run,

I watched fingers of sunlight shine across,

Horizontally across the path that I was running down.

Something was catching them and refracting the light and oh my goodness me,

I mean it was just ridiculous with the mist rising behind.

So beautiful,

So joyful.

Something else that might be a glimmer for you could be the smell of essential oils or petting a dog or a cat,

Being in nature sharing a moment of smiling recognition with a stranger or sipping a perfect cup of coffee or tea.

So noticing our glimmers helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system which is known as the rest and digest part of our autonomic system and it puts the body into homeostasis or a state of balance.

We know that not only does being calm help us process and navigate potentially triggering or activating experiences,

More time in the parasympathetic nervous system in that activated state of the parasympathetic nervous system also reduces our risk of disease.

So there is so much science that informs the compassionate wisdom of rest,

Calm,

Balance and actively looking for the glimmers or these tiny moments of joy we now understand is incredibly important for us and there are thousands of years of wisdom from Buddha to Confucius to Lao Tzu to Seneca and the Stoics that keep telling us the same things we believe or some of us might believe,

We're only learning now when really what much of modern neuroscience is doing is reinforcing what many have always known,

That when we care for our whole being,

Body,

Mind,

Spirit when we let the light in then we are better able to live well and to care with compassion for the world around us and for the people around us too.

I really love the simplicity of the idea of glimmers and if it's something that you're curious about I'm going to share the two books that I reference,

The Stephen Porger's book and the Deb Dan book.

Polyvagal theory has become huge in terms of the understanding of how the vagus nerve which runs from our groin right up into our head,

How it informs our well-being and it's become an incredibly significant part of how neuroscience and psychotherapy are developing in order to better support people,

Particularly people who are recovering from trauma and one of the things I think many of us understand now is that trauma can mean lots of things.

We used to see it just as those enormous desperate experiences of trauma that sadly so many people do go through and that we are experiencing and watching play out in front of our eyes at the moment but trauma also means any experience where we have got an unprocessed memory from it something which has got stuck inside us and so what happens when we get triggered is that unprocessed memory gets reactivated and what this research shows us is how we can have agency for our experience.

We can bring ourselves with conscious awareness and practice,

Practice,

Practice,

Conscious awareness,

Bring ourselves into this calmer place,

This place of rest and repair where everything functions better our mind,

Our body,

Our emotions.

There is a My Darling Girl which speaks to this too and I'd like to share that with you in case it resonates for you.

It's from the first volume of My Darling Girl and it's interesting,

I don't remember writing this one,

I remember writing some of them very,

Very clearly but what I do remember was the feeling of writing this and that feeling I now understand was a glimmer because each of the things I reference in this poem was something that for me was important to remember to take notice of and through that I now know I was reshaping neural pathways,

Bringing myself into a place of calm,

Rest,

Repair.

So My Darling Girl,

Think of all the happy times,

Think of frost sparkling in the trees,

Think of leaves softening your step,

Think of sand beneath your toes,

Think of sun on your skin,

Think of cold biting at your cheeks,

Think of sweetly scented rooms,

Think of hands held in yours,

Think of hugs that warm your soul,

Think of kisses light as air,

Think of friendships,

Love and care,

Think of who you've been with and where,

Think of every happy moment,

Minute,

Hour,

Day,

Month,

Year,

Think of this life and all the times there have been when your heart has sung and your cheeks have ached with smiling,

Think of the constants there have been,

The threads that flow through all these times and remember that in truth there is just one,

One constant,

One thread,

One person who has always been in the centre of this happiness,

You of course my love,

It's you.

Reviews

Henny thank you 😍🙏
A beautiful reminder to start my day 💜

Thank you for sharing 🙏 particularly enjoyed your poem which hearing it is a glimer in itself ❤️

Having just published a book called Ellev8 Book One: Letting the Light in I was surprised and delighted to come across this beautiful reflection! Thank you Henny (I’ll be in touch!)

This was very nice and enlightening. Thank you so much

Thank you Henny for this great reminder and theory 🙏🏾💚🌱⚘️☀️

Excellent! Can you give the books you referenced?

I love the idea of glimmers and this talk ends just perfectly.