I Took A Trip To The Ocean Inside Myself

04:44

I Took A Trip To The Ocean Inside Myself

by Gabriella Barone

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Plays

7

I stopped thinking about my feelings and started swimming through them. I needed to feel what was happening in my inner world. That's when I felt the short, reactive choppiness that lived on the surface. But also felt the slow intentionality of the underworld.

Embodiment Emotional Exploration Visualization Emotional Regulation Self Discovery Inner Peace Self Acceptance Self Love

Meet your Teacher

Gabriella Barone

Broward County, FL, USA

Meet your Teacher

Gabriella Barone

Broward County, FL, USA

Transcript

Recently, I noticed myself living in my head more than in my body. And as someone whose thoughts have thoughts, I was desperate to feel something again. So encouraging a meditation based on feeling rather than thinking, I close my eyes and let the swirling inside of me take the lead. The thoughts came in first, Of course. Attachment, Reaction, Love, Confusion. I decided I need to feel, No more thinking, Feel. And so I began to ride the waves, Literally. And with these waves, I'm trying here now to capture them with words. Thoughts to feelings, Feelings remade into expression. So with this meditation, I really just became the waves. And what I found was that the tops were really cold and crisp. Like an apple, I took choppy short bites out of them. They felt like quick, Pungent slaps. Explosive, Yet fleeting. Sharp sparks, A sensation that maybe even fire can live with water. I really felt the waves and what they represent inside of not only me, But I think of all of us. The top kind of represents the rigid reactions. They're the quick responses to comments that splinter reality. The top is as simple as it sounds, Just the surface. Like a dog taking a sharp, Unannounced bite to a false threat, That's me when I respond from that part of the ocean. When we're triggered and unconsciously reacting rather than consciously responding. The ripples start to bubble. Fleeting and with a lack of depth, They crash into anything and everything without a second thought. This space is home of attachment. See, Love sits at the bottom of the ocean. It's her essence. But attachment, Control, And fear, Those live at the top. Often they look like love, But if we go into the feeling of each of them, They're still short and crispy, Frantic, Desperate, Insecure. So as I continue to feel the top of the wave, I felt it in the top of my chest, Attempting to escape from my throat. It was a straight reaction. And now that I had experienced all of this choppiness, I decided I needed to swim to the bottom. So beneath the surface, The water moved like smoke. It was thick, Heavy, And I felt the pull. It was profound and stable, And my emotions, They moved slowly here. This was the root of what guided the tide. The depths of the ocean were true. They moved from my deep belly and my heart, And they kind of swayed with grace and intention, And I could feel time here more freely without urgency or fret. I was able to question to feel, To explore, To be curious. The waves, Although still moving, Forever evolving, Are more grounded down here. They have a heartbeat, A soul. When I'm in this space, My ears aren't filled with the crashes above. White noise and peace are the closest thing to silence the inner world can be. And when I was there during this meditation, I felt high. I reached a state of tranquility that I forgot lived within me. I was cradled by the water surrounding me and transported back to the womb. Back to deep safety. And here I felt like this was my real self. This is where love and detachment lived and where acceptance was encouraged. I felt like here might be my soul's truest home. And it was more difficult to stay there rather than on the top. My body's default was to come back to the surface, Of course. It took more work to remain in the depths, Maybe because it takes a bit of unlearning. Naturally, Out of protection, We want to swim back up, Take a breath of familiar air, But I think we can learn slowly that if we're with ourselves, The depth is safe too. So after going on these journeys, I know that I want to move from the depths of the ocean. I want to speak with the heartbeat of the waves. I want to digest. To dive deep beneath the white crisp and find what truly lies deep inside. I want to let the feelings of love speak out of me, Not me out of spite. The feelings were so vastly different from top to bottom, One being wounded, The other the essence of who we are at the core. One felt like love, The other felt scared, And I want to move with love. So I hope that you move from the depths of the ocean that lives inside of you, And I hope that you enjoyed this. Thank you so much.