Arrogance – Is It A Defense Or An Offence?

Sometimes you meet people who show a behavior of arrogance, and you feel that they try to put you down by their actions. The person shows an intimidating and expressive behavior which gives the thought of looking down upon others – an often masculine behavior or superiority. But is what you see also a real fact? From all my research, I found that arrogance is a defense mechanism to hide underlying emotions.

Transcript

In different podcasts I already refer to the different thinking and methods of people you meet in the streets,

In your life,

In meetings,

Maybe friends or family.

And they have specific behaviors.

One of the questions that I got is about arrogance.

Arrogance is for many people something unexplainable and it is even referring to the narcissism in society.

What we find out is that narcissistic people have a tendency to be arrogant but they have also many different behaviors that are not related to that.

So I want to start with just telling you about arrogance in its different way,

How it's exposed and how it's felt by the one who is arrogant and the victim of this arrogance.

And it starts like is arrogance,

Is it a defense or is it an offense?

Yes,

It can be an attack but it also can be a defense mechanism.

Sometimes you meet people who show a behavior of arrogance and you feel that they try to put you down by their actions.

The person show an intimidated and expressive behavior which gives the environment thought of looking down upon others and often they also show a masculine behavior of superiority.

But what you see is that the real fact.

From all my research I found that arrogance is a defense mechanism to hide underlying emotions but it also could be an offense mechanism.

Many experts explain these emotions as insecurity but I found that other emotions are even as likely to be possible.

Let me explain a few emotions which can be covered by arrogance.

The arrogance of aggression.

In many houses there is a situation that one aggressor,

One of the family members or external family members of the house is terrorizing the rest of the family or certain members by verbal or even physical aggression and is covering this behavior by the outside world as being arrogant.

Aggression in the house situation often delivers submission of the people who are bullied.

They show fear and will act humble to the aggressor.

This fear and submission boost the arrogance of the aggressor and inflates an imaginary personality and this results in that this cover-up of the internal affairs behind the front door.

Arrogance of religion.

It's also called religion's dysfunction but it's a dangerous thing in this society.

Some people show a strong religious behavior.

They act and collect as much knowledge as possible,

Take part in all kinds of ceremonies and they talk endlessly about the belief and they are very active in the community within it.

They have some form of distorted religion sinking,

Religious ideas of being a superior personality which is the bringer of the message of God.

They show this particular behavior in preaching the message,

Demanding others to take the message seriously,

Even correct them and are very fanatic in following the exact procedures as an assist others in their pushy way to follow the way they do it.

Arrogance of power.

Some people rise to power.

It does not matter that they do it slowly and they gain power step by step or they just suddenly achieve it.

Their personality will change into arrogance.

People with power are able to order directly or indirectly and they demand others to do something they wish.

The power to order others is corrupting and stimulating a sense of arrogance in many people.

They feel higher and better than others and are often seriously thinking that they are better.

They are superior but only in their own mind.

The arrogance of knowledge.

Science and learning can bring people to a higher level of knowledge.

Sometimes the difference between the ordinary people and the scientists become extremely big.

So big that both do not understand each other anymore as they talk a complete different language even when they speak about the same tone.

At the moment the scientist is no longer willing to explain the science in common understandable ways.

We can consider that there is a case of scientific arrogance.

Scientists is no longer willing to bridge the gap and expect the commoner to rise itself to his level and if they want to be superior in their knowledge.

For this reason I want to give another example that is more common with the line of thinking and that's the arrogance of insecurity.

This form of arrogance is mostly mentioned by psychologists when talking about arrogance in general.

The person who shows the arrogant behavior is hiding a feeling of insecurity or inferiority by acting superior to others.

It is true that some of the insecure people will use aggression,

Knowledge and religion to express a form of superiority and oppression to others but when this is based in insecurity these elements are not strong enough to be convincing and finally will lead to the exposure of the real personality.

Arrogance can be either a defensive and an offensive mechanism of the person.

We call arrogance defensive when the person uses the behavior of to protect itself and sometimes others.

So it's possible that it is used to protect others as well and they have a strong and expressive way how they show their superiority to others.

In these cases they often use bluff as a defensive weapon to overrule the approaching party.

An arrogant person starts the defense often immediately when they suspect a form of danger to themselves or to the people they think to protect.

In some cases arrogance can be very offensive.

These people will enter parties,

Meetings or other gatherings in an extrovert way of behavior.

They dress very extrovert and they display themselves as much as possible in the center of the attention.

They enter to conquer and defeat.

Often they are not likeable people at all but because of the attention they receive from others they get addicted to the so-called honor and often publicity.

There are very few people who have arrogance as a mental dysfunction and they are not able to behave differently as their mind is distorted and they're functioning in a very special way.

For instance,

Narcissistic people they really have that way.

In fact these people have no idea that they have an arrogant like behavior but the outer world cannot see that part.

Most arrogant people have a constant inner battle within themselves.

Part of the battle is about improving their behavior,

Their power,

Their knowledge,

Their religion and so on.

They want to be better arrogant.

That sounds silly but they also want to improve their arrogance to a superior level.

On the other hand there is a constant feeling of not understanding the reactions of the outer world to their behavior.

They're not able to have self-reflection in a corrective and especially not in a rational way.

This irrational process slowly but steady lead to a form of depression and often a collapse of the full personality.

And in many cases also to suicide and even killing.

Arrogance has an age-dependent parable of power.

It grows.

The first real signs of arrogance start to develop during the first stages of puberty.

During puberty there is some form of maturity in the process and starts to create a specialization of the expression of the form of arrogance.

In most cases the arrogance slowly matures between 20 and 30 and reach a peak between 30 and 40.

Only in a very rare cases it will continue till deep in the 50s.

Most cases encounter the depression stop,

Meaning they stop being arrogant,

Between 40 and 50 and start to decline and suffer of mental problems at the same time.

Most suicides take place around when they are 50,

So in their 50s.

Arrogance has many different levels and it's also possible that people have temporary stages in their life in which they are arrogant.

Environment can have a stimulating effect on that behavior.

Is arrogance a real problem for society?

During my research I found that specific religions pay a great deal of attention to this behavior as they do consider it dangerous attitude toward the gods as they think at least that is what they preach.

That arrogance places people in the same level as the gods.

Arrogance is a fiction of the mind,

A mind construction which is not based on reality but a strong illusion and cannot be a real threat to any organization if the organization is aware of it.

The real problem for society starts when the personality is aggressive or in a superior position of power.

No matter what kind of power it is,

It can be politics,

The military or even in science.

Arrogant people with power can harm our society a lot and we do see this happen in every part of the history.

The reason why they can come to power is that arrogance often comes with very manipulative powers.

They are able to use the weakness of people against each other and make use of these situations.

That is where their main power can be found.

Arrogance develops a feeling for weakness and manipulation of this weakness.

It creates a sixth or seventh sense for this.

The conclusion is that arrogance can become a real problem again and again when people do not use common sense,

Fact-checking and rationality in their decision-making.

If you have a weakness and open to manipulation you will be a victim of an near arrogant person.

And how do you solve the problem of arrogance when you are confronted with it?

The weakness of arrogance is that the facts are no longer facts and that they disappear with some more or less intensive checking.

It is possible to blow arrogance cover just fast when you seek evidence of the facts,

Control time and events and talk to the people who were supposed to be the witness of the participants of the events.

This is one of the most important ways that arrogant,

Aggressive people can be disposed.

If you think you have a tendency to be arrogant you must likely reduce this problem by using the fact check and evidence control on yourself before bringing something into the open.

Check,

Check and double check always will help you to put your feet firmly on the ground and keeps the arrogance away.

On the other hand when you are the victim of arrogance you do the same.

You collect the same evidence of facts and you confront the person with it.

Being a victim is a weak position and you should not confront an arrogant person alone because you already get victim.

This is always must be done with some other people around you as evidence and witnesses.

These other people are not only the witness of the evidence but they also form a kind of security as arrogant person may have the ability and the tendency to get into a rage of anger when they are exposed.

Question and answer.

Question one.

I'm an arrogant person and I know that very well of myself.

I'm reaching the age of 45 and losing my beauty and confidence.

My money cannot afford me more surgeries so my physique is declining.

Slowly I feel to go into a depression as often I have those negative moods and do not leave my home anymore.

I isolate myself.

Do you have any suggestion for me?

Answer one.

Arrogance is environmental depending.

You could be arrogant in the environment you live in as they accepted this behavior of you.

Now you think that you become weaker and you feel all remarks on you are some form of attack.

Even the smallest talk can make you feel really hurt.

The only way is to leave that environment and seek a new living elsewhere.

When nobody knows you it is a new environment you must start all over again and you will be confronted with new people and new visions which can be confrontational at first.

You know that currently you are weaker than before so you should choose a position that is below your abilities.

When you excel in your work people will compliment you and that will help you to build a new position in a new environment.

This is often the first step of healing both a depression and the arrogance.

Question two.

Are narcissistic personalities always arrogant?

Answer two.

In general we can say that narcissistic persons always do have some form of arrogance.

The level of arrogance can be hidden very well by real narcissists.

A narcissist is only busy with himself,

Her self,

It's personal interest.

Sometimes arrogance cannot be in their personal interest and they will hide this tendency very well only to get even more benefits.

The problem of narcissistic personalities is that they are very well equipped with manipulative,

Oppressive and exploitive tendency of others and are able to use even arrogance into their benefit which make them the most dangerous leaders in the world.

Question three.

Can arrogance be a protection?

Answer three.

Yes sometimes it's possible to use arrogance as a protective measure when you do not want to get around with certain people if you have to live in a specific environment.

Plate arrogance is not easy at all and you must be very consistent in your behavior and follow certain drills to maintain the same behavior at all time.

So be very cautious if you want to use it as a protection because it's easy to be exposed.

Question four.

Can arrogance be hidden by a person?

Answer four.

Yes some people are really well equipped with the ability to hide their true nature but it's not possible to hide it all the time and not for a long time.

Arrogance pops up under pressure and in difficult situations.

When arrogant people get into situation of choice,

Stress or in public exposure they are often not able to suppress their real nature and will expose it by expression,

Vocal accords,

Emotional outbursts or simply by starting to manage the situation in their specific way.

Question five.

Can arrogance be cured?

Answer five.

There is a strong possibility to cure arrogance as at least change the severity to a very acceptable level.

The key to arrogance is moderation to be acceptable and to have an acceptable level for your environment.

It all depends on the cultural and standard behavior rules of your personal environment what people consider acceptable or not.

When the person is able to keep the expressions within the borders of these rules we can consider it controlled but not cured.

The answer to the question is that real arrogance cannot be cured but controlled to an acceptable level.

Thank you for listening to my podcast and I hope you listen to the others.

This lecture is part of a series called the terms of life which explain the major terms we need to live to survive and to understand our life.

My name is Arnald van de Vere from the Netherlands.

Please leave a note and send me an email if you have any question or comment.

Everything is welcome and everything will be answered in time.