Of Mice And Moments | The Onion Of Responsibility

Of Mice and Moments - a podcast that finds significance in the small moments. In this episode, Clay talks about dealing with the responsibilities of adulthood. He reminds us to remember times in life when we were not weighed down by all of the things that need to get done.

Transcript

Hi, This is Clay Stevenson and welcome to Of Mice and Moments, A podcast that finds significance in the small moments. I grew up in a very quote religious household. My parents were high schoolers when the United States was drafting 18 year olds for the Vietnam War. Graduating high school in 1969, They were both inundated with the counterculture movement of the 60s. While some kids rebelled against their parents, The greatest generation, By moving to communes, Protesting the war, And imbibing in casual sex and drugs, My parents rebelled in another way. They found Jesus. And not just a casual conversion experience, But a profound and radical one. One on par with the climate of the 60s. As a result, I grew up in the Jesus movement and we took a deep dive into the evangelical experience. And as capitalism took advantage of this movement, We, As consumers, Purchased Jesus mugs, Shirts, Artwork, Books, Collectibles, And music. Ah, The music. Christian music famously moved from hymns to embracing mainstream sounds of pop, Rock, And hip hop. If you were an evangelical Christian kid in the 90s, You most likely listened to Christian knockoffs of all the most popular artists and bands. As such, I found myself listening to one particular Christian band and remember these lyrics that only truly resonated with me recently, Many years later in my 40s. The lyrics are, Responsibility, What's that? Responsibility, Not quite yet. Responsibility, What's that? I don't want to think about it. We'd be better off without it. I was in the midst of a discouraging mood the other day. And so I took a break from what I was doing to contemplate why I was so down. How could I feel better? What did I need? I felt like I had a blanket over me. No, Not a blanket, But many blankets piled on thick and heavy. My thoughts kept coming back to all of the things I needed to get done that day. I was overwhelmed. There were pressing issues with my family, My job, My house, My car. All of them needed attention. And I was doing what I could to address them. All of these concerns were my quote, Responsibilities. When that word popped into my mind, The lyrics ran. Responsibility, What's that? Responsibility, Not quite yet. Responsibility, What's that? I don't want to think about it. We'd be better off without it. In that moment, I was transported to my room, My parents' house upstairs to the right next to the bathroom, Posters on the wall, CDs on the chest of drawers and me lying on my bed listening to that song, Reveling in the freedom of life. Singing along to that anthem to stave off the inevitable. That dreaded season of life when responsibilities become commonplace and freedom and joy are distant memories. In essence, The present. It wasn't like one day I decided to tackle 15 major responsibilities and surrender my liberty to enjoy life. No, It was a slow boil. I was a lobster in the pot of life. And as the years passed, I slowly cooked. And then I was at the bottom of a pile of heavy pelts, Each one beautiful but heavy and smothering. An image of an onion formed in my mind and I started to peel each layer away slowly, Considering them individually and laying them down to God or the universe. I couldn't carry all of these responsibilities on my own. And the realization that the responsibilities were bringing and holding me down allowed me to address my discouragement at the root. Giving them up even briefly in that moment helped me experience for a second the freedom of my youth, The bliss of days before a job, Before kids, Before a car payment or house, When I could just be a teenager, Lie on my bed and sing, Reveling in the fact that at that moment, I had nothing pressing that needed my attention. So how about you? Do you find yourself weighed down by all of the things you need to do? Are your responsibilities thick, Like the layers of an onion where through tears you find your true self at the core? Like me, Maybe you need to take a step away, Give up your responsibilities at least for a while. If so, Maybe you need to lie on your bed and sing and revel in the fact that at this moment, Your responsibilities can wait. And in doing so, Maybe you'll find the freedom and peace you've forgotten.