Making Peace With Your Self

It's important to understand how to make Peace with yourself. I do a deep dive into how to do that by listening to your inner child, accepting and loving yourself, and by listening to and making peace with your shadow self. It is so important to make Peace with yourself so you can then make peace with others. In a world of conflict and divisions, we can help to find a way to peace within so we can share it with others.

Transcript

Aloha,

I'm Reverend Cindy Palos and this is another in the series of Elements of Peace.

And originally I was just gonna do 10,

Then it grew to 12,

And I kept getting more and more insights as I was progressing on this journey.

And a new one came to me just this morning that I felt was extremely important.

And that is negotiating peace.

Now we know how important it is to negotiate peace with others,

But first let's negotiate peace with ourselves because we know peace begins within.

And our biggest obstacle in really negotiating peace with ourself isn't really another person or a lack of power.

It's really always going back to ourselves.

Many times we do sabotage ourselves and that always again you have to look at is where does that come from?

How deep can you dive to see if there's something inside yourself that hasn't negotiated peace within yourself?

If you have any hidden shadow selves,

Any destructive patterns,

Any issues with self-worth,

Any problems with communication,

Then we really can find that we have to do that first with loving ourselves and understanding ourselves to make better relationships with ourselves.

And I say relationships not relationship because we have a lot of roles we play in life.

Shakespeare said that the whole world stage and we are actors playing out our roles indeed and we do and it can be very helpful if you do a lot of different things in life if I do.

I'm a DJ,

I do radio announcing,

I also play announcements for rock and roll radio and I am a talk show host with thousands of talk shows.

I'm also a teacher,

A spiritual teacher,

I'm an author and what I do with one may not be the same as what I do with another.

However behind it all is the seed of my own self and you learn to hone how you can express that self so you feel comfortable with the roles you play.

I can't help but thinking of a very famous actor who would always be doing romantic comedies and was so successful.

I mean just made millions and millions you couldn't even get him to play a role he was that busy and at the peak of his career he's told his agent no I don't want to play any more romantic comedies.

I want films that make a difference,

I want films that are interesting,

That express and develop myself as an actor and as a person and he went on to be very successful playing a whole different role.

Now there'd be lots of reasons for him not to make the change right?

Everyone would tell him well gosh you know you can get millions and millions of dollars why take a chance you know?

Well if you really trust in yourself you are able to take a chance because then if you trust in yourself you can find that deep inner purpose that is really what you came here for and if you do that like this actor did and said you know what I didn't come here to play these roles in romantic comedy I mean I'm doing them but that's not really what I want to do then you can trust yourself to take a chance and part of that is to really be able to understand all of yourself.

We are very very deep complex people and your soul has been with you for so long many lifetimes and over the lifetimes has played out in many many many roles in many different places and has learned to hone the skills you know a lot of times to get what you want is really important in life so you work your whole life to get what you want right?

But how about if you work your whole life to get what you want and then get stuck in that and that's not really what you want anymore so it's a very interesting complex deep dive into ourselves to negotiate peace with ourselves because if you're following the role you started with and you make major changes inside yourself through meditation and hard work and insights and reading and then you're still doing that different role that is your old role that part of you that wants to grow may be continuing to prod you and you might subconsciously be getting anxious and angry that you're not fulfilling your purpose in life and yes it can take a lot of risk absolutely you can it takes a lot of you know nerve courage but then to negotiate peace with anyone and with yourself does take courage so how about thinking first about how you can negotiate with yourself looking at a few major principles here we all know we have an inner child and it's important that we understand what that inner child is wanting it's very easy to feed the child some candy or do I don't know maybe it is eating for you maybe it's shopping you know maybe it's taking a vacation which is very very hard to do these days I like to travel and I haven't in ages but if you do a little bit of that you can keep that inner child happy but isn't it best to know what's making that inner child speak and scream sometimes out to you and that inner child needs to be recognized it needs to be loved it needs to be given hugs and understood and talked to and recognized so that would be I think a very important thing to go into meditation with doing a meditation with yourself and finding the inner child within you and finding out what that inner child wants let it speak to you let it express to you what it needs your inner child will let you know if you can be quiet enough to listen of course listening is such an important key in negotiating right and in communicating so if you can learn to listen to yourself and your inner child that's a tool that you can use in finding peace with yourself and finding peace with another person I talked about forgiveness in this book and the book actually says you know practice forgiveness again forgiving yourself first why not tell your inner child I love you I'm sorry please forgive me and thank you the old pono pono practice there works with the inner child as well the other part of yourself you might take a step to understand is that part of you that is your shadow self your dark side I've sat in Zen meditation for days sometimes and it's very fascinating to see what comes up when you're sitting in meditation for a long time all kinds of stuff that you may have been hiding will surface if you're sitting in silence for a long time and people work real hard to keep that stuff buried in fact it gets a little strange sometimes see people acting out after that stuff starts to surface but again this is where negotiating comes in and understanding and forgiveness and listening you can go deep into your emotions and your subconscious and deeper levels of consciousness and find out what is it what is it that's been buried there what do you really really feel that you may have blocked but it if you don't find out if you don't give that dark side the shadow self a chance to express itself you'll find that that shadow self can actually sabotage what your goals are and then when you're finding that conflict within then you will find yourself having to find peace and you may not even realize that you are indeed sometimes sabotaging yourself because of that shadow part of yourself I mean what could be a better example this than people on at New Year's making resolutions we all know so many people make resolutions and we also know that majority of those resolutions do not get fulfilled because it's something we know we should do but there's something in us be it the inner child or the shadow self that will sabotage that part that we've been trying to make the resolution to correct I mean of course one of the things most people make resolutions about New Year's that I think the most biggest thing is going on a diet and that's a hard thing changing your patterns of eating you know it involves your inner child it includes you know what you do to cover up the pain you know it could be many things but if you work on negotiating with yourself in negotiating peace that peace that passeth understanding and make yourself whole in that piece then you have a much better way of improving your love of yourself your understanding of yourself your feeling of worthiness and all of those are so important in finding peace within yourself and finding forgiveness for yourself and when you do that you can learn to love others more you can learn to communicate better you can learn to understand and have more empathy and you can learn to find peace with another person so take some time in meditation and allow yourself to just clear anything out of your mind and to just be comfortable and to just breathe in peace and to really be at peace in a place where you are so solid in yourself you can listen and then go within and start to allow your inner child to speak to you in a safe place and allow that child to express to you just allow that child to express what it feels what it wants and don't interrupt the child but love the child while it is expressing it and write down what that inner child really wants and send that inner child lots of love and forgiveness understanding all the things the inner child might not have gotten and then also take time may not be the same session to go into meditation in a sacred space with lots of protective light around you and contact your shadow self that deep deep part of yourself it may take sitting for a long time it may take weeks but allow that part that you may have buried to come up and express that feeling that is there those issues possibly deep pain possibly anger resentment allow all of that to come out and then love it love it all love it all and release it I know if you can take the time to do this you will find this journey will be a life-changing one and as you learn to do these different processes to love yourself to find peace within yourself to understand your inner child and that dark shadow side of yourself and to accept all of that you will find peace I thank you so very very much for listening and I send you my love my gratitude and great peace God bless you on this journey