Loving-Kindness Meditation

In this guided meditation, we will work with two aspects of a traditional loving-kindness practice, focusing on one person (or animal) we have genuinely positive/loving feelings for, wishing them well, and then including ourselves in the practice. Oftentimes beginning with someone we have true affection for can more easily allow us to then reciprocate and allow that same compassion for ourselves.

Transcript

Hola.

So today I'm going to offer a condensed loving-kindness meditation.

In future offerings we can go through the entire gamut usually with loving kindness meditation.

You might focus on somebody you love,

Who's uncomplicated,

Somebody who is a neutral person in your life.

Then on to someone who you have some difficulties with or flat-out hate.

Those can be challenging and then always bringing it back to the self.

But today just kind of a brief hit on something I do throughout the day which is kind of generating this kindness for myself by starting with one other person.

Picking somebody who I love.

Maybe there's some complication as most of our relationships are complicated.

Unless it's probably with an animal.

Four-legged's a lot less complicated.

Babies possibly less complicated.

But just bring someone to mind who you love.

When you see their little face in your in your mind's eye you have loving feelings,

Positive feelings.

You want this person,

This animal to do well and be healthy and be happy in life.

So that helps us engage and generate these wonderful human compassionate feelings for another.

Which then might open the gate to being able to do that back for yourself.

At least that's how it has worked for me.

Many of us have a hard time starting with ourselves.

So it's just a natural,

It's naturally easier to start with someone you love.

You kind of sneak yourself in there like,

Oh I guess I might love me too.

I'm deserving of these same qualities actually.

So let's start with just briefly setting up ourselves with your your posture.

I'm going to ring the gong.

Let the gong be an invitation.

The sound of that bell is reminding you that you are here.

You're nowhere else.

You're right here.

You're with yourself.

You're alive and animated inside your own body.

You're breathing.

You're thinking.

You're feeling.

And you're safe.

So just briefly start to notice your posture.

However you'd like to set yourself up so that you are alert.

Your spine is straight but flexible.

Maybe you kind of move your body around a little bit to find just the right spot where you feel comfortable.

You can maintain this posture for a couple minutes.

And then moving into your breath as your anchor.

The thing that's going to bring you back to the present moment again and again and again.

If that works for you.

Other people might use other cues.

It could be something that you hear.

Any of your senses.

Some people use a candle flame.

Focus in on that.

Possibly a mantra.

Some word that brings you comfort or peace.

Breathing that word in and out.

But for me the most reliable is my breath because I'm always breathing until the minute I'm not.

So I can always be with my very next breath because I know I'm breathing.

But it does take a moment to slow down and allow yourself to pay attention that you're breathing and that it feels good to breathe in.

It feels good to breathe out.

Just allow your body to settle in.

These deep breaths let you know that you're safe.

You're here.

You're okay.

And once you've established your posture,

Your body,

You're in touch with your breath.

The cycle of breathing.

And we kind of peek into our minds just to kind of get a sense of the flavor of your mind right now.

Maybe there's like a landscape to your mind.

Is it a three ring circus in there?

Or is it like one tumbleweed going by on the prairie?

We're not judging.

Have a sense of humor about it.

What is in your mind?

If you could flip open your head and peek around in there,

What's happening?

And I'm not talking about getting caught up in the storyline of what happened,

Who did what to whom,

What needs to be done.

Just notice the energy of the mind.

Where your mind tends to get drawn into again and again.

Is it in the past?

Is it in the future?

Just notice it.

And then you're inviting yourself to be back into this present moment.

How your body feels with your very next breath.

Kindness toward your mind when it wants to jump in there and comment on everything.

Allow the thoughts to be there,

But also invite them to kind of take a back seat.

And something else is in the foreground.

Our immediate experience.

Our next breath.

But now we're going to give our minds something to do.

We're going to allow them to engage in a way that's very helpful to us.

And in this way we are riding the mind,

Not having the mind ride us.

Very helpful.

We're choosing.

So again,

If you could bring someone to mind who you love.

Just sit with this for a minute.

Bring this person into your mind's eye.

Could be a pet.

Just let yourself imagine their face and their eyes.

Maybe how they look when they see you.

Any other details about their appearance?

Their quirks?

The way they laugh?

Some silly thing they always say?

Their sense of humor?

Or their grumpiness?

All the things you love about this person.

You're just generating this goodwill,

This kindness toward them.

They're so beautiful.

They enrich your life so much.

And they're so worthy of care.

So now if you would just,

You don't even have to imagine it,

They are a person.

Probably pets have way fewer of these problems,

Which is why we love our pets.

But if it's a human,

They probably are struggling with something,

As we all do.

And you might not even know all the things this person is struggling with.

Or you might think you know,

But maybe you don't really know.

And that's not our purpose here.

We don't need to investigate.

We need to generate compassion.

So I like to imagine this person in a bubble.

You can do it however you wish,

But I just put this beautiful iridescent purplish blue bubble around my beloved person.

And for these purposes I'll pick a hymn.

I just put him in this bubble.

He's sitting there calmly,

Breathing,

But all that stuff is in the bubble with him.

Everything he's coping with.

I can't remove it for him,

But I can offer something.

I can offer my intention,

My compassion.

I can kind of hold him in a certain space just for these few moments.

And I can breathe,

And energetically I just want to breathe out whatever I think this person could use.

Now you might be making it up,

You probably are making it up,

But couldn't we all use these basic good human qualities,

These characteristics.

Everyone could use some clarity,

Some spaciousness.

Everyone could use a friend.

Everyone could use a little sugar in their cup,

A little sweetness,

A little kindness,

A hug.

Everyone could use more resources in whatever capacity that that person might need resources.

Everyone could use a kind word,

And a good night's sleep,

And a delicious hot beverage.

So just visualize your beloved person and breathe in and out.

Just seeing some of their hardships kind of settle to the bottom of their bubble.

You can't really fix anything.

You're just kind of here for them energetically.

Possibly you're there for them in all practicality,

In some capacity.

But the purpose of this is not to fix them,

Or change them,

Or be their savior.

You're here to hold space for this person.

In whatever way these blessings come into their life,

Whatever insights come to them.

It may have something to do with you,

It may have nothing to do with you.

This isn't about you.

This is about each of us holding space for another human being who we care about,

Who we love,

Who we offer our open heart and our compassion toward.

And who knows,

Maybe someone's out there doing the same for us right now.

How beautiful would that be?

So just fill up that bubble with all the things you think this person could use,

Today and in the future.

And you might be wishing them an easy road,

And sometimes we don't know if that's the case.

Maybe they are suffering in some way.

Maybe we can just wish that they would understand the causes of their own suffering,

And find a relief for that suffering.

Or feel supported during the suffering.

Or be able to be a friend to themselves through their own confusion.

That they could make meaning out of what's happening in their life right now.

That they would feel loved and seen.

That they are heard and adored.

That they're being thought about.

And now let your beloved friend stay in their little bubble,

And now I'm wondering if we can expand that bubble.

Can it include you?

You can sit as close or far away from your person as you want.

You can have two separate bubbles,

If that feels better.

But for me,

I'm just gonna enlarge the purplish blue iridescent bubble,

And I'm just gonna slip right in there.

I'm just gonna sit in front of my person.

And it already feels really good in this bubble,

Because all these wonderful things have been wished for.

And there's all the sediment.

All the crap that everyone's going through.

It's kind of lying on the ground.

Which is okay.

That's part of our human lives.

It has to be there.

That's our fodder.

That's where we grow out of.

But there's so much more space in this bubble.

And it's permeable.

It's beautiful.

It's kind.

It's open-hearted.

So can you feel for yourself some things that you might need in your life?

You can use these simple Buddhist phrases.

May I be at peace.

May I be healthy.

May I be happy.

Such a beautiful way of doing these wishes.

May I.

May you.

May we.

May we be at peace.

May we get a good night's sleep.

May we find kindness in our day and in our own minds.

May we be open.

May we operate out of love.

May we learn our lessons quicker and not so in such a harsh difficult way.

We do want to learn our lessons,

But maybe we can get better at it and get more efficient.

Maybe we can pick up on the lessons that we've learned,

The experiments that we've conducted,

And see what works for us and what doesn't work for us.

Maybe there isn't any failure.

Maybe we just learn lessons from the outcomes of things and then decide what to do from there.

Maybe it's all just information and we get to decide what to do with that information.

Maybe we have all it takes to work with this information if we can slow down and see what we have.

See our resources.

We each have diamonds in our pockets and we don't even know they're there.

All the facets of ourselves.

And if you're anything like me,

You most likely see the beautiful facets in another human being.

This beautiful person that you have in front of you,

Wishing them well,

Seeing their hurt and their struggle.

You know they're worthy.

They're worthy of love.

They're worthy to be here.

They're allowed to make mistakes.

They're allowed to be human.

So can we offer that same compassion back to ourselves?

We're allowed to be here.

We are here.

We're allowed to learn.

We're allowed to be angry.

We're allowed to be sad.

We're allowed the full human experience.

And we're allowed to rely on each other,

Receive help,

Receive insight from all these wonderful various sources,

Including all these amazing teachers on Insight Timer that have personally given me so much.

There's a lot of room in this bubble for gratitude.

So just take a couple breaths and allow yourself to feel the gratitude of the richness of what you've just offered this other person and yourself.

Again,

Feeling grounded,

Feeling resourced.

See how that feels in your body.

For me,

I feel kind of a tingling around my heart.

I feel this openness.

I hold my head a little higher,

My shoulders back.

I feel like I can be a conduit of love simply by accepting what this other person's going through,

Totally.

And then somehow by virtue of that mirror,

I am accepting what's happening within my own life,

Totally.

What a wonderful reciprocal gift.

So just a couple more deep breaths.

Again,

Noticing your body in space,

Who you are in the room,

How you feel now.

You can kind of let go of the imagery of the bubbles.

You can pop the bubble for now,

But it's all still there.

You can just have that ride around with you if you want.

Hopefully this would leave you with a sense of being a little more light-hearted,

Kinder,

More compassionate.

Hopefully with a sense of humor about this whole crazy thing,

This thing called life.

And then just listen to the gong until the end.

Again,

Thank you for taking this time to slow down,

To notice yourself,

To offer your love and your acceptance of another person who you love so much.

And then allowing that to reciprocate back to yourself.

And then seeing how that works for you.

How does it land?

Is it helpful?

Only you can decide that,

If it's worth doing again or not.

So thank you for your time,

Your attention,

Your attention to yourself and your love for other people.

Thank you.

Take care of you.

It matters.

It matters that we do this.

You matter.

Bye for now.

Reviews

What a relaxing joy. My heart is filled with gratitude. Thank you.

So helpful!

Lovely meditation Chrissy!!💜❤️💜❤️
Congratulations on becoming a teacher. I'm so happy for you. 🥰
Thank you for sharing your gift with the world.

Beautiful! 🙏