Letting Go Of What You Can't Change

This meditation offers a space to release the weight of what’s outside your control. Through deep breathing and visualization, you will cultivate clarity, calm, and the freedom to move forward with ease. By gently letting go of resistance, you create space for inner peace, resilience, and a renewed sense of lightness in both mind and body. This is part of the Daily Coach series of meditations.

Transcript

Have you ever found yourself clinging to something you can't change?

Maybe it's a mistake you made,

A decision you regret,

Or a situation you wish had turned out differently.

It's hard to let go,

Isn't it?

And yet,

Holding on can leave us feeling stuck,

Weighed down by things that are no longer within our control.

As Eckhart Tolle reminds us,

Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.

I'm Chibs Okereke,

And welcome to The Daily Coach.

Now maybe you can resonate with this,

But when I find myself navigating the stresses of work,

Relationships,

And life,

It's easy for me to replay the past or cling to a sense of control.

But what I've realized is that letting go isn't about giving up.

It's about creating space for clarity,

Calm,

And freedom.

In today's session,

We're going to explore the power of letting go.

Using breath,

Body awareness,

And visualization,

We're going to gently loosen our grip on what we can't change and reconnect with the present moment.

Let's begin by finding a comfortable position.

You might be sitting in a chair with your feet resting flat on the ground or lying down with your arms by your sides.

Whatever position you choose,

Just allowing the body to feel supported by the surface beneath you.

If it feels comfortable,

We might choose to close the eyes,

Or we can leave the eyes open and soften the gaze.

And let's take a moment to bring our awareness to the breath without needing to change or control it.

Simply noticing the rhythm of the inhale and the exhale.

Now we might want to try lengthening the exhale slightly.

A good way of doing this is to do a little count inside our minds.

Breathing in through the nose for a count of four and breathing out through the nose or the mouth for a count of six.

If it's comfortable,

Let's try that together now for a few breaths on my count and then you can do a couple on your own.

Breathing in,

Two,

Three,

Four.

Breathing out,

Two,

Three,

Four,

Five,

Six.

Breathing in,

Two,

Three,

Four.

Breathing out,

Two,

Three,

Four,

Five,

Six.

Breathing in,

Two,

Three,

Four.

Breathing out,

Two,

Three,

Four,

Five,

Six.

And doing a couple more breaths like this in your own time.

This longer exhale engages our parasympathetic nervous system which is our body's natural calming system and this helps us feel more grounded and settled.

And now you can allow the breath to return to its natural rhythm.

Okay,

Good.

And now I invite you to gently bring to mind something you've been holding on to.

Maybe a situation,

A mistake,

Or a frustration that's out of your control.

It might be something recent or something from long ago.

Whatever comes to mind is okay.

You might notice how it feels to hold on to this thing.

Perhaps there's a tightness in the chest,

A heaviness in the shoulders,

Or a knot in the stomach.

Whatever we notice,

There's no need to fix or change it.

We're just acknowledging it with kindness.

Now let's imagine that this thing we're holding on to is an object and we're gripping it in our hand.

Perhaps it's a stone representing the weight of what we're carrying.

In your mind's eye,

Noticing how tightly you're holding on to this stone.

What might it look like if we loosened our grip ever so slightly?

Perhaps we still feel the stone resting in the palm of the hand.

No longer something we're clinging tightly to,

But simply something we're holding gently.

And now,

Whenever it feels right,

We might imagine opening our hands fully and allowing the stone to fall away.

How does it feel to let it go?

Maybe there's a sense of lightness or maybe there's still a bit of tension and that's okay too.

Letting go is a process and it doesn't have to happen all at once.

And bringing our awareness back to the breath now.

Noticing the inhale,

Noticing the exhale.

Okay,

Good.

As you go about the rest of your day,

I invite you to try this simple practice.

The next time you notice yourself holding on to something you can't change,

I want you to pause.

Take a slow breath in and out and then I want you to visualize yourself holding that stone in your hand.

Acknowledging its weight and imagining yourself opening your hand and letting it fall away.

This practice comes from mindfulness and somatic techniques which use the connection between the mind and body to help us release tension and find ease.

By imagining the weight of what we're holding and releasing it through visualization,

We're gently teaching ourselves how to let go.

Now letting go doesn't have to be perfect or permanent.

Even loosening your grip for a moment can create space for calm and clarity.

There's an old Zen story I like about a monk who was walking with his student.

They came across a woman who needed help crossing a river so the monk carried her across.

The student was stunned.

He couldn't believe what he'd just seen because it was forbidden for a monk to touch another woman but he kept quiet.

Hours later as they continued their journey,

The student could no longer hold back his frustration.

He blurted out,

Why did you carry that woman?

You know we're not supposed to touch anyone.

The monk paused then calmly replied,

I set her down long ago but it seems you're still carrying her.

This story reminds us how often we hold on to things long after we've set them down.

Replaying conversations,

Regretting decisions or wishing things were different.

Letting go isn't always easy but it's one of the most powerful gifts we can give ourselves.

And if we haven't already done so,

Gently opening the eyes and coming back to the room.

Thanks for joining me today and I'll see you next time for The Daily Coach.

Reviews

Calming voice with great breathwork.
Much thanks.

This was beautiful and the visualization was so helpful for me. Thank you🙏

Wise and soothing words, thank you.

I feel this meditation has found me when I needed it most. Thank you 🙏 for sharing this. I love the visualisation. As they say "Where the focus goes the energy flows". Unfortunately I have spent too much of my energy focusing on things I can't change or have no control over. Let's drop that stone. ☀️

Hello Chibs...I've had to learn and relearn how to just let things go...drop them and leave it there..at 65 I've done some life living...no regrets...alot of life lessons...
First of all..I did not know you were here on Insight Timer...life coach...I listen to you every night and everyday on the Calm App...you are amazing...you help me go to sleep every night 🌙 with your meditation and sleep..with you talking about you on your beach ⛱️ in Australia...thank God for your gift to the world...I have added several meditations to my playlist on here...I've always wanted to thank you...finally I can..
Blessings and Hugs 🫂
Donald James Dodge

I love the visualization of the stone in our hand. Giving ourselves permission to let go. ✨

That was great thank you

I listened to your meditation for the June reset and liked your calm voice. During this letting go meditation you said something that I've never heard before, that letting go is a process and it doesn't happen all at once. Thank you Chibs! That statement will help me be more gentle on myself while I let go 🙏

Short but powerful!

That. Was. Incredible. Thank you.

Thank you for sharing

Very interesting thank you

Thank you 🙏

A great reminder 💫 Thank you 🙏

As always words of wisdom from you, thank you 🙏🏽 so much

Thank you for the stone visualization technique. I’m going to come back to it. I’m Currently struggling with resentment. It’s a tough one.

This was very good. I will remember the story when I am holding on to things that no longer serve me.

Thank you that was wonderful. Letting go is so very difficult, but essential if we want to be able to move forward. Be well.