Welcome to this meditation.
I'm Zach and I'm honored to be your guide.
Today we will embark on yet another storytelling adventure,
Where we will uncover profound insights and ancient wisdom.
Myth,
Story,
Legend,
Song,
Poetry.
These are all languages of the heart.
They are art,
They are dance.
They bypass the mind and speak directly to your soul.
Using mythology,
These meditations combine storytelling with reflection to help us develop an internal landscape that over time can grow into mature old growth ecologies of people and land.
So let's enrich our inner landscapes through imagination,
Dreaming,
And myth.
As you find a comfortable position,
Close your eyes and take a deep breath in and out.
This is the story of Tristan and his very unwelcomed guest,
Saturn.
Can you remember a time when you've struggled with emotions that seem too heavy to bear?
Have you ever felt a deep unnameable grief or an inexplicable sense of loss?
Sometimes these may be personal and other times they may be collective and more ethereal.
These feelings are part of our shared human experience.
As Rumi would say,
How do we make more space for the banquet table of life for all our parts to come?
Let's start with a little gentle box breathing exercise.
We're going to count to four,
And then hold and exhale for four,
And hold for four.
We're going to repeat a couple of times.
So inhale for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And hold for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And exhale for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And hold for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And inhale for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And hold for one,
Two,
Three,
Four,
And exhale for one,
Two,
Three,
Four.
As you relax,
Prepare to journey with Tristan through a story of maturity,
Of growing up.
Let's begin.
In a small,
Quiet town lived a young artist named Tristan.
At 22,
Tristan carried a profound,
Unnameable grief within him.
He felt the loss of communal life and the natural world deeply,
An ache that resonated in his soul.
He grew up on a cul-de-sac where he used to play with his neighborhood children,
But now they have either moved away to distant cities or got too busy to stay in touch.
He also noticed over his seasons of life that more and more of the surrounding woodlands were turning into brand new strip malls.
This gave Tristan an unnameable sense of loss that he thought was just his own brain chemistry.
Though he had started to study dentistry to place his parents,
His true passions lay in music.
He dreamt of becoming a singer and songwriter,
Yearning to express the emotions that churned inside of him.
Tristan's art studio was a reflection of his inner turmoil.
It was cluttered and chaotic,
With scattered sheets of music,
Broken strings,
And half-finished lyrics strewn across the room.
The walls,
Adorned with posters and sketches,
Seemed to close in on him,
Mirroring the chaos in his heart.
Can you relate to Tristan's cluttered studio,
Or maybe your liking is more of a neat and tidy space?
How do our physical spaces reflect our inner emotional states?
One night,
As Tristan worked late,
A noticeable chill filled the room.
The outside world felt silent and a cold,
Damp feeling settled in his heart.
He turned to see a tall,
Dark figure,
Cloaked in gray.
Saturn,
The god of memory,
Of time and nostalgia,
Hovering over Tristan and pronounced out loud,
I am the one who governs the harvest,
The process of aging,
Weights and measurements in the metal lead,
And most importantly,
Melancholy.
All things heavy and cold are my children.
Saturn took an unwelcome seat next to Tristan.
How do you welcomed the unwelcomed guests in your life,
Such as difficult emotions or challenges?
As Rumi suggests in his poem,
The Guesthouse,
What might these guests be here to teach you?
Tristan tried to ignore Saturn at first,
Focusing on his work,
But Saturn's presence was undeniable.
I have come to season you,
To ripen you,
Saturn said.
Tristan,
Confused and irritated,
Responded,
I don't need this right now.
I have enough on my plate.
I am the expression of your truest nature,
Saturn repeated.
Tristan struggled to understand,
Feeling more frustrated and a bit taken off by the darkness that seemed to hover over Saturn.
You cannot avoid me,
For I am part of you,
Saturn continued.
I am the teacher who you have invoked.
Over time,
Tristan began to engage with Saturn,
Though reluctantly.
Months passed and Saturn's presence remained.
Tristan's resistance gradually gave way to more curiosity.
Saturn's words echoed in his mind.
I have come to make holes in your assumptions of life.
Tristan felt his frustrations and fears intensify,
Yet he began to see glimpses of wisdom in Saturn's teaching.
During sleepless nights,
Tristan's inner songwriting began to change in his dreams,
Showing depth and emotion,
A softening.
Although Tristan's outer world became more unfunctional,
He was sleeping most of the day away,
Unable to get out of bed,
Missing classes,
Lacking interest in things that once provided him with joy and comfort.
His urgent to-do list of bills and schoolwork piled up and largely left unintended too.
How has grief in your life challenged or reshaped your assumptions about the world?
What old beliefs or perspectives have been made into holes through your experience of sorrow?
One night,
Tristan reached his breaking point.
Overwhelmed by emotion,
He broke down,
Releasing months of pent-up sorrow.
Tristan could no longer hold back the flood of emotions.
He collapsed onto the floor of his cluttered studio,
His body shaking with sobs,
And he released the sorrow he had kept locked away.
Tears streaming down his face,
Each one carrying the pain of loss dreams,
The fear of failure,
And the grief for a world that seemed to be slipping away.
Saturn,
Ever patient and a true master teacher,
Guided him through his catharsis by allowing Tristan to feel the full breath of his emotions and not trying to console or comfort them away.
He bent down on one knee and placed a warm but firm hand on his heart.
He watched as Tristan unraveled.
The silence of the night seemed to echoes Tristan's internal turmoil,
Amplifying the loneliness and despair that had been bubbling for months.
The constant struggle between his unfulfilled dreams and the expectations of those around him had worn him down.
Embrace me and you will find the voice you seek,
Saturn said calmly and deliberately.
Grief and joy,
Our two sisters,
Spun from the same yarn,
One to draw you down and to deepen you,
And the other to teach you of gratitude.
As the night wore on,
Something within Tristan shifted.
The suffocating weight on his chest began to lift,
Placing a sense of clarity.
Tristan began to understand that his grief and anxiety were essential parts of his growth.
He wiped away his tears and reached for his guitar,
Feeling a new sense of purpose.
The notes that emerged were raw and honest,
Carrying the essence of his deepest emotions.
His voice,
Once blocked by fear and doubt,
Now flowed with a newfound strength,
Expressing the pain,
Hope,
And yearning that had been buried for so long.
In that moment,
Tristan understood that his struggles were not hindrances,
But catalysts for his creativity.
His grief and anxiety had carved out spaces within him,
Making more room for a deeper,
More authentic expression of his truest self.
And with Saturn's guidance,
He had found the voice that he'd always been searching for all along.
What role does patience and acceptance play in your own healing process,
As shown by Saturn's approach with Tristan?
As shown by Saturn's approach with Tristan.
With newfound clarity,
Tristan's art flourished.
He viewed life with fresh eyes,
Appreciating its complexity.
As Saturn prepared to leave,
He offered parting words.
Remember,
Peace comes through acceptance,
Through understanding the shadows within,
And making a banquet table of offerings for each of life's many visitors.
Every once in a while,
With as much balance as joy,
A sorrow washed over Tristan.
He would look up into the skies and greet Saturn as an old friend.
He would pour some of his drink onto the ground as a token of his appreciation of the wise master of the wild edges of sorrow.
Take a deep breath in and a deep breath out.
Reflect on Tristan's journey and the lessons he learned.
Remember,
Grief and gratitude are the two hands in the prayer of life.
Whenever you face your own unwelcomed guests,
Embrace them and find the wisdom they bring.
We must weather the monotheistic notion that life is always to be cheerful.
The soul will resist any project of self-improvement.
Slowly begin to bring your awareness back to the present moment.
Wiggle your fingers and your toes,
And when you're ready,
Open your eyes.
Thank you for joining me on this journey.
May the wisdom of the forests,
The waters,
And the old gods be with you.
