Do You Actually Want Your Dream Life?

In this session we begin with an energetic body scan, focusing on different points and witnessing what arises energetically, spiritually, mentally, and physically. We end with a contemplation of the question “Do you actually want your dream life, and is it actually possible?”. This track was taken from the course ‘Hunt Your Own Shadow’, available now via my profile on Insight Timer.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to the session, I invite you to take a seat or lay down and get yourself comfortable, You can close down the eyes if you wish, And take a deep slow breath in through the nose and out through the mouth, To begin today's session, We're just going to do a little bit of an energetic body scan, Focusing on different points in our body and seeing what arises, We're not looking at our physical body per se, The muscles, The sinew, The bones, The blood, That sort of stuff, But more the energetic spaces within, Some traditions and practices might call these spaces energetic centers, Or chakras, Or any number of other things, But what I've discovered is that whatever you call these spaces, There are parts of the body that seem to hold symbolism and power, And there's debate between different spiritualities and practices and traditions as to the exact location and amount of these energetic centers, But what is certain is that if you sit in contemplation, In openness, And just feel these spaces, Things arise, And what arises is worth witnessing and observing, No matter the back-end spirituality or logic that people try to apply to it, So with that said, I encourage you to take another slow calm breath, In through the nose, Now through the mouth, And just invite you to draw your attention to the space in between your eyes, Sort of in between your eyebrows, In the center of your body, The third eye space, And just witness that space, Are there any colors, Sounds, Feelings, Or emotions, Any words that space wants to say, Any visions it wants to share, Just sit with that space, And observe without judgment, Without filter, What that space wants to share, Now draw your attention down to your throat space, The place within your body, The energetic center, In your neck, In your throat, Just invite it to share, Are there any feelings, Thoughts, Moods, Emotions, Any words or visions that are arising, Invite that space to share itself with you, And observe it without judgment and without filter, Now just move your awareness down to your heart space, The space in the center of your chest, And just feel whatever arises from there, Are there any thoughts or emotions, Feelings, Visions, Sounds, Words, Open yourself up and just simply observe without judgment, Without filter, Whatever is arising, And just welcome it, Now draw your attention down to your belly space, Somewhere around your navel, Just allow it to open, To speak, Just observe without judgment, Without filter, Whatever is arising for you, Are there any emotions, Moods, Thoughts, Feelings, Words, Visions, Just allow them to arise, And finally just draw your attention to your pelvic floor region, And allow yourself to open up, To feel whatever is arising, Are there any moods, Emotions, Feelings, Thoughts, Visions, Sounds, Words, Invite that space to speak, And simply listen without judgment, Without filter, Okay, So in a moment I'm going to ask you a question twice, Then we're going to contemplate the answers that arise with a free and open and flexible mind, Just allow whatever comes to come, Allow thoughts and feelings and emotions and moods to arise, And just see where it takes us, We're opening ourselves up to possibility, To potential, And to a less rigid way of thinking, The question is this, Do you actually want your dream life, And is your dream life actually possible, Do you actually want your dream life, And is your dream life actually possible, So the concept of a dream life is interesting, Because we often look at other people's lives and you know, Feel jealousy, Wish we had them, Wish we could be them, Wish we would be living their life, But often we only really see one aspect of that life, It's easy to look at someone that is wealthy and be resentful, Be jealous, But we're not really looking at the totality, We're not seeing the late hours, The time away from home, And the many other sacrifices it likely took to get that wealth, Similarly the person with the good body, Yeah we're envious, We want what they've got, But perhaps we don't want the discipline of diet and exercise that they must maintain to maintain that body, But beyond that, Beyond these one-to-one comparisons, Modern society has us wishing we could be everyone all of the time, Consider social media, We see somebody traveling, Somebody else succeeding at work, Somebody with a great body, Somebody with a family, Somebody being successful, Etc etc, And we want it all, All of it right now, We build this dream life in which we're living all of those lives all at once and more, Without sort of taking the step back to realize that we can't live all of those lives all at once, And indeed we can't live any of those lives for those lives aren't ours, And yet that dream persists, This dream of comparison, Born of jealousy, Born of ignorance, Born of confusion, That's one place this question takes me, Do we actually want our dream life? Because for some of us our dream life isn't actually our dream life, It's a concoction suggested to us by social media, By society, By parents and education and religion and things other than us, A successful quote-unquote person does this therefore you suddenly want that, Well do you? Is success defined externally or perhaps it could be defined internally, With something you actually want, What do you actually want, What is your real dream? I sometimes wonder this because it's taken me a long while to realize what I actually want in this life, Me personally, Not what I didn't want, You know, It's easy to go okay well I don't want this to happen to me, I don't want these things in my life, That's sort of like a running away from dream, But what do I actually want, What do I want to chase, What do I actually value? We can look at this idea of like a distant mountaintop, Our deepest truest values are like a mountain in the distance and if we know that that's our mountain we can head towards it, But until we know that's our mountain we're sort of wandering aimlessly from point to point, Landmark to landmark, Fulfilling other people's dreams, And sadly a lot of us never even realize that that mountain exists for us, That we could head towards it, That it's possible to attain. And that the journey towards the mountaintop is actually the dream life, Because here's the thing, Winning a gold medal, Achieving a certain rank or position, Doing some sort of accomplishment, That isn't really the goal, The goal isn't getting one thing, It's living a life, Those achievements are so temporary it's almost laughable. Think about this, The last time something amazing happened in your life, Be honest with yourself now, How quickly did you start thinking about wanting more? I would wager a bet it happened very quickly, The ecstatic nature of success is short-lived. One of the aspects that we discover is that a lot of our suffering comes from comparison, Comes from the need to continue to grow, Comes from never accepting peace in the moment, You attain something you want more, We evolved to be like that, To never be happy, Oh look we found a tree with honey in it, Cool, When's our next meal coming from? We need to survive, That's how our brains function. So yes there will be a few people who have this goal to attain great heights, But for most of us a goal is more to live a life of values, A life according to our wishes, Things that we truly want, But we may or may not know that. What I would suggest is this, That you consider what you really want in life, You can ask yourself what does success look like, What does it mean to be truly successful, And discard all the answers that come from anyone other than you, Because if other people put that success into your mind and you attain it, You will still not be happy, That's just simple fact. Have you ever heard someone say that they were happy to achieve the dream or the goals that their parent, Their society, Their religion put upon them? Very rarely, You have to first find and discover what your dream is, And then have the courage to take steps towards it. This is a journey of introspection and this course can help you to discover what your true, You know, Calling and purpose is, But part of it at least initially is to shed the false goals and dreams that other people put up. Our dreams can be made real if we re-evaluate what a dream is. Unfortunately what you've been told in school that you can achieve anything is a lie. To achieve anything you have to be everyone. I think it's a sad truth that we have to accept our limitations, But we also have to accept our potential. I personally cannot do everything, No matter how hard I tried, I could not be a professional basketball player, I'm simply not tall enough. I doubt I could have made it through becoming a lawyer. Maybe I could have, But simply put, I didn't want it enough, And the wanting of the goal enough is part of what makes you, You, Right? Natural talents combined with desire, Combined with aptitude, Combined with the luck of being born in a certain place, A certain time, With certain parents, And certain, You know, Features of the household, Wealth, Status, All these things really do dictate what you can and can't achieve in life. It's an unfortunate fact, But one that we need to accept. This isn't to say that you can't achieve greatness, But you can't achieve all different versions of greatness, And to think so is to be deluded, But it's equally delusional to think that you can't achieve greatness, You just first need to discover what your dream, What greatness is for you. I urge you to consider what your highest value is, What that distant mountaintop actually is. Is it status? Is it power? Is it love? Is it time? Is it the ability to read a book every night? To share a quiet drink with a friend? To party? To own a fancy car and work on it? To tend a herb garden? It doesn't matter, But if you discover what your dream is, You can actually start making progress towards it, And you know that you're making progress towards it when the progress towards that dream itself is desirable. The journey is the destination, Just as much as, If not more than, The destination itself, Because you'll spend more time walking towards that mountain, You'll actually spend atop it. That's the simple fact, Is that the journey is the destination really. I don't know about you, But sacrificing my life for a moment of glory that is short-lived seems foolish, But you tell me if I'm wrong. The final thing I want to suggest here is that whatever goal you aspire to, Whatever your dream is, We must consider all aspects of it. In the same way it's impossible to live everyone's life, We must also consider the downsides or the pain points that come with the dream. To be a good basketball player, You need to practice and drill and do the work, Even when no one's looking. To be a good poet, You need to read and write daily. To be successful in business, You need to work and liaise and do all the other things you need to do in business to be successful. To be a success, You need to fail over and over again and continue trying. You need to have a thick skin. The point is, Can you handle the obstacles? Can you handle the pain points? Can you handle the dark parts that no one sees? Because that too, It actually is an aspect of your dream life. Can you handle that? Because you can't have one without the other. Once again, This is a hard truth perhaps, But you have to accept it all if you want to live in the glory of that mountain. The final thing is this, This idea of if you actually want your dream life, Do you actually want it? Or is it just a distant goal you're putting aside for someone else, For some time else? Because if you are, If you are putting it aside, I would suggest that you've not yet discovered what your actual mountaintop is. Because once you discover what your actual dream life is, You'd be running towards it and doing anything else but pursuing that dream life. Would feel obnoxious. This isn't to say that you won't have to work or do other things that aren't sort of in line with that goal, But you'd be doing it so that you can keep taking those steps on the path towards that mountaintop. Do you have to work a side job whilst you build up your dream life? Your business, Just to survive? Maybe. Do you have to work in order to spend time with your family? For sure. But can you do what you need to do to live that dream life? So I ask you this, Do you actually want your dream life? Is your dream life actually possible? Do you actually want your dream life? And is your dream life actually possible? So, Well done. This brings us to the end of the session. At the bottom of your screen, You'll see the option to view the classroom or to ask a question. And before moving on, I invite you to take a moment to click through and share your insights, To read the answers from the other students and to hear my replies. This is an opportunity for deep learning, Further introspection and insight, So please don't miss out. I look forward to seeing you in the next session. Thank you. This track was taken from the course Hunt Your Own Shadow. It's out now and available through my InsightTimer profile. I invite you to check it out and I'll see you there.