Why We Don't Notice We're Burnt Out

11:14

Why We Don't Notice We're Burnt Out

by Verena Thackeray

Rated

5

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Plays

1

I was on holiday. Sitting in a sauna. And I suddenly realised — I had been under tension for weeks without knowing it. If someone had asked me, "Are you stressed?" I would have said no. I was functioning. Getting things done. Feeling productive. That's the thing about the doing mode. It feels fine — until it doesn't. In this talk, I explore why we get so comfortable running on adrenaline, why it's so hard to stop even when we want to, and what I found that actually works — not a full meditation, not a self-care routine, just a tiny grounding practice that takes 30 seconds and can be done anywhere. Because you don't need to go from 100 to zero. You just need to find your feet.

Burnout Stress Grounding Body Awareness Self Care Self Worth Mindfulness Grounding Technique

Meet your Teacher

Verena Thackeray

16 Oranienburg, Deutschland

Meet your Teacher

Verena Thackeray

16 Oranienburg, Deutschland

Transcript

Hi everyone. Today I'm in my new. . . Setting here because my My little baby, Now 8 months, Took over my studio. And now I've found myself a new home. Studio atmosphere and I think I like it. I'm in my most favorite chair. In my rocking chair and Yeah, To diet. I would like to talk. About. How we can ground ourselves. Or what grounding means or why we need it. Mmm. And I think I start by sharing. Yeah, My latest experiences. Last week my family we were on a little holiday which was beautiful and yeah, Everything what we needed. And while I was sitting in a sauna. Don't know why there, But it came up there. I realized how much I was loved. Under tension the last weeks and My whole body. In this sauna, I felt like, Okay, Now I can let go, I'm safe. And I was realizing how much tension there was the last weeks, And if someone would have asked me, Do you feel under stress, Do you feel under tension, I would have said, No, No, Everything is fine. Um. . . But I realized that I was constantly in a hustle mode. Yeah, In a doing mode, Like I was doing, Doing, Doing, Doing, Doing. Keeping myself busy. I would say, And I think we all know that from either a workplace where we have meeting, Meeting, Meeting, Meeting. Who were or where I don't know when you run a family as a mother or father caregiver and you are like toddler cries, Baby cries and you are on fire six in the morning and that goes the whole day. You are alert. Um or whatever tasks you are having and you just you're functioning throughout the day and I realized how i was in this doing mode and i think i was so much in a doing mode that when someone asked me like how do you feel i would say like yeah yeah good or if some when someone would have asked me like do you think a pause would be good i'm like no no no i have full energy i'm i'm good i'm good And looking back now, I realize, Ugh, These are usually the signs of like. . . Maybe there is a little bit too much going on or I'm a little bit disconnected from myself. But to be honest and fair, I haven't realized it until I was sitting in the sauna. And in the sauna, I was also reflecting why It is so much easier to stay in the hustling mode, In the doing mode. Than breaking out and really pausing because it you are like in a well-oiled machine somehow, And you are functioning, Functioning, Functioning. And to press the stop or pause button is so hard it is like throwing you out and you feel like The wheel needs to run, Run, Run, Run, Run. And it's easier to run. And it's so hard to stop and pause. I think maybe you know this feeling. Um. . . But then at a certain point you come to a moment where you feel like oh god i'm so exhausted or your body tells you That was hard or you have a cold. Some external factors force you to stop. And then usually you realize that was a little bit too much. And I was wondering why we are so comfortable in this doing mode and why it is so hard to break out. I think it is the way we are conditioned. For me, When I'm doing a lot, I feel that the day was worth something, That I achieved something. I appreciate myself more when I do a lot of things. I think in the end I feel more responsible, I feel more appreciated, More valued and I think that's why I keep doing, Doing, Doing. And sometimes it feels for me such a huge jump to okay i would like to be the zen version of myself but i'm here now and like it is such a big step to go there. I want it, But it feels. . . If it's just too hard. So I was thinking, How could I do that during. . . Gays. Where I'm like, I should do now a meditation, But we know from 100 to zero. It's not doable. I mean, Let's be honest, It would be ideal. Budge. From my experience, It's really, Really hard to find a moment. Where you then are like okay I do a meditation. I love that, But usually I need to be already from 100 to at least 40 to say, Right, I do a meditation now. So sometimes I need something which brings me from 100 to 40. And which is quick, Which is. Not such a big interruption in the day just a moment where I'm like and I found myself this grounding exercise where I'm like. . . Yeah, It works best in a sitting position or or a standing position, Doesn't really matter. And where I just imagine that under my feet. There are growing roots. Like a tree and these roots are going down the earth and like i feel my feet on the ground or when you are sitting i feel like my sitting bones are really really giving up weight onto the chair and I feel that roots are connecting. Myself to the ground and even further down to the earth. And immediately when I do that now, I feel that my shoulders drop a little bit. I feel like I can. Let go a little bit more, Because sometimes my husband used to say, Verena, Let go. Everything's all right. But when you are in a moment where you are like. . . You can't just let go. How? And I think I learned for myself that I need to feel connected. Stable and safe and secure and in my body. And by doing this little exercise, Grounding my feet on the floor, Imagining these big roots like a tree or from my pelvis rooting down, And bring weight into my feet, My legs, My pelvis. I instantly felt that my upper body can let go a little bit. And that's something we can do anytime. I just did that now while talking and I feel already a little bit more. . . So. Yeah, Just wanted to share that with you. I think grounding ourselves Doing these little micro pauses during a day, That doesn't have to be this big thing. I'm doing a meditation now. I'm doing a full session of self-care. It can be these tiny, Tiny moments. Yeah, Where we just check in with ourselves, Find our feet, Find our legs, Our pelvis, And just ground ourselves. And maybe Maybe we just try that a little bit in the future? Maybe you join me trying? And let's appreciate that. There is a lot of condition of us being in the doing mode. And when we are happy with that, All good, Don't change anything. But if you have a feeling like I have sometimes that There might be also another version of myself which I might like a little bit more and for me it is this Zen version of myself. Then maybe it's worth to explore a little bit how we can come out of this doing, Doing, Doing mode. And I think first step is always. . . Realizing it. Observing it, Not be angry with ourselves when we are in this mode or were in this mode, Just bring us back in the moment, In the presence. I'm going to try a little bit more grounding exercises the next days. Tell me how it feels for you. I'm curious, What are your experiences with the doing, Doing, Doing, Doing mode? And yeah, What I wanted to say to finish up is. . . Let's appreciate that this is a condition that we feel most appreciated and valued when doing something, Achieving something. But let's also embrace the idea that we don't need to do anything, We are worthy already. Doing anything just for being. I think this is something I'm going to explore. As well in the next session. Because there's a lot to unpack. But for the moment, Let's just observe that, Accept that. And when above we feel like. . . Our pulse is rising a little bit. We are under pressure. Let's just take a beat. And find our feet. Bind our sitting bones and ground ourselves. Try it out, Let me know how you feel and thank you very much for listening. That was a joy with you here in my new setup. Stay curious and maybe we hear or see us next time. Thank you!