Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

Just because you don’t know what your gift is doesn’t mean you don’t have one. We have all been bestowed with gifts. I’ve never met someone who didn’t have a gift. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that it’s too late, too much has happened in your life, you’re too old, or your life has no meaning. You have a lot to offer. You have a ton of life experience, knowledge, and hidden talents. It’s not too late.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to your free audio training where I'm going to guide you through figuring out what your gifts are. I'm MasaB and by now maybe you know you would have found me on Instagram or Facebook or maybe you heard me on a podcast or came across one of my YouTube videos. However you found me, I am so happy that you're here because what we're about to delve into today is really the thing that I absolutely love doing. In fact, It's my gift. And when I say that it's my gift, I want you guys to know this, That I have had many variations of what I thought was my gift. And what I've come to realize is that I have many gifts and I love to do a lot of things and I'm passionate about a lot of things. But when I really took the time to understand what lit me up, What made me feel energized and what I could do over and over and over again and never get tired, It was this right here. It was showing people and teaching people that you have a gift, That you have many gifts. And I know in the online world and especially the internet world, People are always trying to tell you to start an online course or become a coach or do this and do that. And I'm all for it. Like go, Go help people, Go do that. But a lot of times what I find stops people from doing that, From going out and helping people or, You know, Maybe you've started, But you kind of feel stuck is because you haven't really done the prep work. You haven't really looked at, Man, Is this really what I love doing? Is this my gift that I want to move forward with in life? Is this the thing that I want to help people with? Now, I'm not saying to you, You could only focus on one gift and that's it. What I'm hoping through this training is that you're going to be able to really get clear on a few things. You're going to get clear on what energizes you. You're going to get clear on what you're passionate about. You're going to get clear on your gifts. Maybe your one really big gift that you've been ignoring or running away from or just completely in denial about or multiple gifts. And then from there, Really kind of asking yourself, Like, Well, Now what do I do? Right. Like, Now what? Now that I know what my gift is, Now what? So before we begin, I just want to say that that is exactly the work that I do with people. You can either come and work with me directly one on one to figure out what your gift is and learn how to leverage that, Package that, Promote that so that you can get paid for it. Or you can go through this training, Be done at the end of the training and be like, You know what, Vass? I know what my gift is, But I need help creating content. I need help coming up with the course, You know, Course curriculum. I want to learn how to pitch myself to the media. And if you need that customized, Personalized attention, That's what I'm here for. That is my gift. I work very well with people one on one. It is the thing that makes me so happy and excited when someone walks away from our sessions together, Like, Holy crap, I know exactly what I'm doing. I know exactly how I'm going to bring this out into the world. And so that's what I really hope you get out of today. And I am pretty sure you're going to get it at the end of our training. You'll be pretty damn clear about what your gifts are. So just a little bit about my background. My academic background is in social work. So I have a master's in social work from Columbia University. I have a master's in education as well. And I knew that my gift was always that I wanted to help people. I didn't know what that looked like. Right. But I but I but I sure well, You know, Tried different paths. So I tried the teacher route. That's why I got my master's in education. I tried the therapist route and I still offer therapy to people if they ask. So I saw my master's in social work and I'm a licensed therapist. Then I went down the coaching path. That's the most consistent thing that I've done for almost for over 10 years now. Then I realized I love I have the gift of gab. God gave me the gift of speech. And so I love being on television. I had my own radio show, Had my own podcast, Was a morning show co-host here in Austin, Texas. So I realized how many different things that I loved doing. And I built a business around all of those things. And I what I found was that the more I did the stuff that I loved, The more profitable I became. Because when you bring your passion to things that you love, People feel that and people want that and people want to learn from you. What I want to say is this. Whether you're in the category of, You know, I know I have a gift, But I just don't know what to do with it. Or, You know, You believe you have a lot to offer, But you don't know where to start. Or maybe you're in the other category of, You know, I have nothing to offer. I want to help people, But hey, I have nothing to offer. This is where I come in because I'm here to shatter your belief that you either have nothing to offer or who's going to buy what I have to sell. Before we even get into the buying part of what you have to sell or the selling part of what you're what you're going to be offering or creating the course. I want to say this to you. I want to say to you that your life is your greatest teacher. Use it to help others. And that's exactly what I've done. I've taken everything that I've learned, Right? Someone who is in recovery from alcohol and substance abuse. Someone who's recovered from codependency. Someone who has dealt with, You know, Mental illness, Depression, Anxiety. Someone who's built a business over the course of 10 years and has pitched herself to multiple media platforms. As someone who has effortlessly with no marketing budget, Attracted many clients through the use of marketing myself in no cost ways. I've taken everything that I've learned, The good, The bad and the extremely painful and ugly. And I have turned that into what I believe is something that can really help other people in all walks of life. But for the purposes of today's training, Whether you are a stay at home mom and you're just like, You know what? I know I want to do more than just raise my kids and be a wife. And you know what? Hats off to you for even for doing that and being so committed. But you know that there's more. Right? So suppose you're you're a stay at home mom or you're a newly retired individual or you're a nine to fiver. And you're like, You know what? When I'm done with work, I have like time on my hands and I want to create something. I want to create some passive income. I know I know there's more just beyond my desk, My cubicle. Or you're a busy entrepreneur and you work primarily with one on one clients and you want to take what you already do with your one on one clients and create a course around it. Or maybe you've learned other things in the course of, You know, Your business and and running your practice. And you're like, You know what? There's more that I want to offer. What can I offer? There must be more wherever you're at in your headspace. There's absolutely no excuse. And there are way too many avenues today to be able to share valuable content. And you can do it. I truly believe that every single person has something that they can sell package and get paid for. If you just allowed another human being to help extract that from within. And that's where I come in. And a lot of people don't believe me when they're like, Do you really work with people one on one? Yes, I'm very intimate with my clients like we get on the phone, We get on Skype. And whether we're mapping out your course curriculum or we are trying to figure out what your gift is, Which is what I'm going to be teaching today. But if you always want to go further, You can contact me. We can do a one on one session for that. Whatever it is. If you know. That you want to help people and you just don't know how to do it or you don't know what you're going to be offering. This training is absolutely perfect for you right here, Right now. I have never met someone who does not have a gift. I'm going to say that one more time because I'm speaking directly to you. I have never met a human being that does not have a gift. The problem is that most people do not think that they have a gift. OK, And. After this training, You're going to know, And if you're not completely crystal clear, Because it does take time, Right? We're we're working through layers of self-doubt and lack of confidence and fear, But sparks are start to sparks are going to start to fly. Right. You know, Pathways in your brain are going to start to light up. You're going to start to have a little light bulb moments. Right. So just be patient with yourself. To be completely transparent, I've gone through many personal challenges over the past decade, Including depression, Anxiety, Divorce and rehab. And it's been a wild ride. And honestly, That's that's what qualifies me to help you right now realize that no matter what you have gone through in life, Your life has meaning and can be used to lift other people up. So let's get started. OK. So, Like I said, I've never met a person who doesn't have a gift. Most people think that they don't. And today we're going to shatter that belief. When we think about the word gifts, I think it kind of throws us off for like gifts. What does that mean? Start looking at your gifts as your strengths. Start looking at your gifts as a thing that comes the most naturally to you. Start looking at your gifts as things that you just kind of do with ease. Like you don't even think about it like like things that your friends or family member have been like, Wow, You're really good at that. Right. So start paying attention to that. I want you to start paying attention to that because oftentimes it just requires us to slow down and be mindful and present of what we're doing in each moment and paying attention to how we feel when we're doing it for us to realize, Like, Holy shit, I think this might be my gift. But we're so caught up in our headspace and our mind chatter that we don't realize it. So here are a few ways that you can figure it out. If you haven't already, Make sure you get a piece of paper, Get your journal, Get something great, A beverage to drink, A tea, Coffee, Green juice, Water with lemon, Whatever you want, And get a journal and get something to write with. So this is in no particular order, But I'm going to give you six ways that you can figure out what your gifts are. And they don't cost a dime. And you have access to probably every single thing that I'm about to suggest that you do. OK, First way that you can do it. Let's talk about it. Ask your closest friends, Clients and co-workers. OK. And all you got to do is ask them this. What am I really good at? So write that down. First way, Ask your closest friends, Clients and co-workers. I want you to ask five people this week. And if you have more, Great. But stick to like five people in your life that know you really well, That you know have your back, That are your biggest supporters and who love you. And you know who those people are. And if it doesn't have to be five, If it's two, Fine. It's OK. Ask people in your life that you know are cheering you on, Right, That want the best for you. What am I really good at? It could also be another question that you can ask is, What do you come to me for when you think of me and you want you want to get this problem solved? What do you come to me for? Right. So the first one. What do you think I'm really good at? And second is some sort of version of like when you need to get a problem solved and you come to me, What do you come to me for? Right. Like we're all known for something. That's the thing. So my girlfriends, They come to me when they're complicating their lives. Right. And listen, As someone who has complicated the shit out of her life for 37 years and is like it really allowed people into her life that that's created chaos. Like I am the queen of uncomplicating my life now. I was the queen of complicating my life and I'm the queen of uncomplicating my life. Right. And so I know that my friends come to me and I did this exercise with my friends. So I'm not asking you to do anything I have not done myself. OK, I'll ask my friends, What do you come to me for? And I got some versions of like, Oh, Well, You you keep things really simple. You always have a solution, A really simple solution. Or you help me change my perspective on things. Or if I need a really good vegetarian recipe because I'm trying to give up meat. Right. Like some of my friends eat meat. They're like, We come to you. So like all sorts of things. Don't disregard anything that your friends tell you. Just take it in. Allow allow them to pour on you. Allow a pour into you. Allow them to kind of tell you what you're good at. So ask them, What am I good at? What do you think I'm good at? And what do you come to me for? What's the problem that you know that I can always solve for you? And the more time the more times that you do this, The more you're going to start to see a pattern. So be aware of the pattern. And one thing that I I really want you to be mindful of is like when someone says something to you and they're like, You know, You're really good at this or you're really good at solving this problem. Just receive it. Don't question it, Because that's where we start to screw ourselves over, Because we're like, No, There's no way I could do that. No way. Like, No, Just shut up and take it. And I know that sounds harsh and I say that with love, But like, We just need to learn to stop talking and listen sometimes, Especially when we're trying to do some work within ourselves. And we want to get that feedback, Honest feedback. We just need to learn to close our mouths and just take it. Because God comes in the form of human beings. Hear me, The universe, God, Your higher power comes in the form of other human beings. So when you reach out to your friends, Your family, Your coworkers, People that you're close to, Your significant other, Just take it in, Because that is that is something bigger than you working through another human being to share a message with you. Something that you need to hear. Okay, So that's step one. That's that's your first option. You could try that way. I would love for you to try all these ways that I'm about to give you. So step two is this is where you got to pay attention, Right? Pay attention to when you're most in the zone. What do I mean by excuse me? What do I mean by most in the zone? What I mean by that is what energizes you? What is it that you can do for hours on end where you are the most focused? Right? Is it cooking? Is it arranging flowers? Is it listening to somebody's problem? Like really listening, Right? Is it knitting? Is it baking? Like, Just pay attention to the thing that you can do with no distraction. Because here's the thing. We live in a world where it's it's we get distracted and we're multitasking and like I'm gonna I'm gonna really invite you to be present, Especially as you're trying to figure out what your gifts are. And I'm gonna challenge you a little further to start paying attention when you're not only when you're most in the zone doing something, But to focus on one thing at a time as you're doing this work. What do I mean by that? Whether you're doing the dishes or you're cooking or you're watching a movie or you're reading a book or you're answering emails, Whatever you do, Just do that. It's gonna train you to be focused and present with no matter what you're doing. And guess what? The more focused and present you become, The more in tune with yourself that you're going to become, The more aware of what's going on in your body and your spirit. All of that's gonna come to surface. And so when you are doing the thing that you're most in the zone, Right, You're you're gonna notice it. Because a lot of times the things that we do when we're most in our zone, We don't even realize that we're in our zone because we're not present. You get what I'm saying? So be present all the time. Try to. And then when you're doing the thing, Whatever that is, You'll know, I promise you, You will know when you're doing the thing that is most in your zone, You're gonna be like, Oh my God, This is it. You will know. And it might be multiple things. But the fact is, Don't just wait for this light bulb moment to happen. Start paying attention. Now start being mindful. Now, Quick story. Every morning when I wake up, I make my bed. That's the first thing that I do. I don't touch my phone. I don't do anything. I like I get up and I make my bed and I make my bed perfectly every morning and it brings me immense joy. Now, That's not my gift, But it sets the tone for the whole day. It does. Because like when I'm making my bed, I'm making my bed when I'm when I'm scooping dog food into my dog's bowl, I'm scooping dog. I'm doing everything I do. I do one thing at a time. Right. So pay attention to everything that you're doing. Be mindful with everything that you're doing. And then the more mindful you are and then you might try doing new things and you can be present when you're doing it and not just do it to do it. You'll be like, I want to try this dance class or I want to try this baking class. And you've already started to train your mind to be more present. So when you're doing whatever the thing that you're doing, You're going to be like, Oh, Wow, This this actually is fun. I like this. I could do this forever. But it requires you to start paying attention now. Right. Start paying attention now. Start being mindful now. Whatever you do, Start paying attention and being mindful and being present. And that is option number two. And I'm and I'm going to just go out there and say, Like, This is a life lifelong thing. This is not just, Oh, I want to figure my gifts out, You know, Figure out what I'm good at. So let me just be present. Like, I'm actually challenging you to do this with everything that you do. And I promise you, Once you start becoming more mindful and present, You'll really start to see what lights you up and what energizes you. Step three, Option three is to look at what you loved doing as a child. OK, If it's hard for you to kind of think about what you love doing as a child, If your parents are still alive or your or your siblings and, You know, If your family members are around who raised you, Ask them. What did you love doing as a child? Right. If you don't remember. And if you do remember or, You know, Your photos that you went through or whatever, Just like allow yourself to daydream. Right. So the prompt that you can ask yourself is when I was a child, I felt the most alive when I was. Or I feel most like a child when I'm doing this. Right. And when I say when I feel most like a child, I'm doing this. You know how it is. You've seen children, I'm sure, You know, Whether you have your own or you remember your own childhood, Like there is a pure innocence and a pure hearted innocence that is intrinsic to all children. We don't we don't we don't see the world as you know, We're not jaded. Right. Everything is just kind of pure and fun and like, Oh, I can do anything. When do you most feel like that? When did you feel like that as a child? And when do you still feel like that as an adult? For me, I loved spending time in nature and I still spend time in nature. In fact, I just came back from a walk before I started recording this. Went for a long walk with my golden retriever. It's a beautiful night out. It's like 70 degrees, Walked around the lake. And I knew that I wanted to clear my head before I started recording this. I said I'm going to go for a long walk. So we walk like two, Three miles and it was great. But the reason why this is important is because if you love doing something as a child, I'm not saying that that's necessarily your gift, But it could be the access point for you to understand what your gifts are. Right. So for me, I get back to my center and I feel grounded and I feel clear as a bright blue sky when I'm out in nature. So I'm not like a rock climber and I don't take people out on the trails to run like that. I don't. That's not what I do. That's not how I that's not I go and help people. I help people in a different way. But nature is my is my access is my direct access point to myself, My higher self. So you can get a lot of answers from whatever you love doing as a child. So if you love dancing around in your underwear when you were a kid and you felt the freest, Do that as an adult and see what comes to you, Because it is when we are the most alive and we are the most free and we are the most present that those brain juices start to flow, That we start to feel in touch with ourself. And we're like, Oh, My God, I know what I need to do. So these are all different ways that you can really start to access what your gifts are. So the next thing is. Number four is to look at what actually lights you up, Right? So we talked about what you love doing as a child. What actually lights you up now as an adult? Now, If you're in a place in your life where you're like, Vasavi, Nothing lights me up. I have a job that I don't like or I'm bored or I'm in an unfulfilling relationship or I'm burnt out. I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it. I really do. But were you always this way? Did you always feel this way? Can you recall a time in your life where you where life didn't feel so heavy, Where you felt alive, Where you had sparks of genius or where you were like feeling in your zone as an adult? What were you doing? Who are you surrounded by? What were you doing that that really lit you up? Was it was it singing? Was it dancing? Was it karaoke? Was it playing the guitar? Was it drawing cartoons like what you know, Or like, You know, Sketching? What was it? Was it was a beating jewelry? Like, What is the gift here? The access point to your gift is to really start paying attention to what you just absolutely love doing. You could do it forever without getting paid a dime for it. So I'm going to share with you guys a really quick story, OK? And because I want you guys to know that, Like, Oh, Vasavi is giving this audio training. She just, You know, She doesn't understand. No, Hold up. Let me let me give you a really quick story here so you understand. So I had a few difficult years in the past few years. If you followed my journey on on my Facebook or my Instagram or, You know, On any of my other podcast interviews that I've that I've done. However, You found me. I've shared about being in and out of rehab twice and being in a very toxic, Codependent relationship that led to my addictions. And now, Like this new second chance at life that I've been given and I'm so grateful for it. But, You know, By the grace of God, I am sober and I wake up every day very grateful. I thought a lot about like, What the hell am I supposed to do with my life now? Am I going to go back to like providing therapy? Am I going to be a coach again? And then, You know, I recently came back from India and I became a yoga teacher, Like a registered yoga teacher, And started teaching meditation and yoga to people. And I'm like, OK, So is this what I'm supposed to do now? Like, What am I supposed to do? Because I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. Now, I'm not saying this to you. So you can be like, Oh, Well, Vasavi, You have so many skills. That's not my point. My point is I've been on the hunt my whole life. Right. So I provide I provide therapy for people because I really love listening to people and I want people to feel heard. And I want them to feel like they can trust somebody because, You know, You don't come to therapy because everything's OK. Like not most people do not go to therapy because they're like, Life is great. It's usually something causes that. Right. So I always want people to feel heard. And with the coaching, I really believe in human potential. And I believe that every single one of us has a special gift and every single one of us can do anything that we want. And I, To my bones, In my bones believe that. But when my life was burnt to the ground because of stuff that choices that I made and what I allowed into my life, I didn't know myself anymore. And I'm like, I don't even know why I'm here on this earth. And when I spent the time doing the things that I'm asking you to do, What I realized is when I take away all the stuff that happened and all the heartbreak and all the burning the life to the ground and just like things that I just couldn't even believe that I did, I realized not much had changed. I mean, I had changed internally, But I was like, I still love helping people figure out what their gifts are because my core belief is that every single one of us has a gift. So I still love doing that. So I'd been so jaded by everything that had happened in my life that I was looking for an answer in all these different places. But I came back home to myself and I realized this is what I love doing. So I'm saying all this to say that maybe you've never taken the time to ask yourself what your gifts are. Maybe you have and you had a taste of it or you or you knew what your gifts are and then something happened. Maybe you got divorced. Maybe you went to rehab. Maybe you got fired and you just kind of lost your way. And now you're like, Well, What do I do now? What the hell are my gifts? My promise to you is, Is take the time to figure it out and you will figure it out. Make it your make it your job to start listening to yourself and asking yourself and reminding yourself and and and and remembering that you were put here on this earth for a reason. Okay, So I was searching all over the place to try to find what lit me up and I came back to the very thing that I'd been doing, Which is this work right here. Helping people figure out what their gifts are. That is what I absolutely love doing. And so wherever you're at in your life right now, It is not too late. It is not too late for you to figure out what your gifts are and the fact that you're even asking is a great first step. It shows that you do inherently no matter what's happened in your life. You you do believe that maybe there is something more to your life and you know that everything that you've gone through in your life is then just happened to happen and and and and and you're searching for that meaning. So keep, You know, Just keep doing what you're doing. Keep looking inwards. Keep asking yourself those questions and then do something with it. That's the that's the most important part, Right? Because so many people have the knowledge about themselves, But they don't do anything about it. And so I want to celebrate you right now in this moment for even listening to this audio training coming this far and for you know, You're going to be doing the work after after you get off the app after you finish listening. You're going to go talk to your friends, Your co-workers, Spend that time with yourself, Start being paying attention, Being more mindful, Being more present. And so hats off to you. And really, You got to be proud of yourself. So the sixth way that you can figure out what your gifts are. And I'm going to start with this, OK? And maybe you can I'm just going to kind of clue you guys in. So I don't I don't spend a lot of time on YouTube. I have videos on there, You know, That I've posted throughout the years and and all that stuff. And unless I'm getting a tutorial on like, I don't know how to how to paint a wall or something or, You know, Something silly like that. I don't spend a lot of time on YouTube. OK, But when I do, I love watching little kids dance and I love watching dance choreography because. It is mind boggling to me how people can can can choreograph and also just like learn choreography. It is it is amazing. I love it. I love seeing other people do that. I get I get entertained by it and it brings me immense joy watching that. Now, Maybe you maybe you got a little clue of what I'm talking about. But the sixth way for you to really figure out what your gifts are is to look for the talent in other people. Right. I had a mentor who once said to me, Spot it. You got it. Right. And so oftentimes I'm just going to be really blunt here when I say this. We see somebody else shining and we see somebody else succeeding and we get jealous. And we're like, Who do they think they are or their stuff sucks or why do they even think they're good enough to do that? We say mean shit, Right? We're human beings. Thoughts cross our head. Don't judge yourself. It's a great place to look, Though, Because if you're looking at if you see somebody else who's talented. And you really can't find anything positive to say about them. And they're talented. Right. Like I have people who hate on Beyonce. I was like, How could you hate on Beyonce? Right. But like when you look at other people who are talented and you find yourself not being happy for them and not appreciating their talent, But rather you're feeling jealous and envious and kind of cynical. It's a great mirror for maybe what you want to be doing in your life and, You know, Things of, You know, Wishes on fill unfulfilled in your life. So maybe you OK, Suppose you see people who are singing and you're like, Their voice sucks or I could you know, Who do they think they are? Whatever version of it is in your head. You know what? Did you have a lifelong dream of singing? Did you love singing as a kid? And maybe you stopped or maybe you. See somebody cooking or painting or some sort of artwork, Or you see a really successful coach online doing really well and hosting all these webinars and doing all this, And you're like, Oh, Who do they think they are? Like, Oh, I can't stand them. When you start thinking that way, Rather than being sucked into the downward spiral of jealousy and envy, Ask yourself, What am I hating on them for? And what is this really saying about me? What do I need to learn about this about myself in this moment? Right. I when I first started my business 10 years ago, A little over 10 years ago now, I remember seeing so many people kind of doing what I wanted to be doing now, Coaching. The coaching industry was just starting, By the way, It was just starting to ramp up. But I remember noticing all these people doing these things like stuff that I want to do, Like speak and write and do all this. And I, I remember initially feeling like I could do that. Well, Who do they think they are? I could do that. I could do that better. But guess what? I wasn't doing it. I wasn't doing it. And so I use that as fuel to really look at myself and look at, Well, What do I want to be doing? What can I learn from this person? Right. So. Option number six, Step number six, And figuring out what your gifts are. Look at the talent of other people. And ask yourself, What can I be learning from that person right now? Because when we start hating on other people and we start getting jealous of other people, We disconnect from ourselves and we're too busy focused outwards. So ask yourself, What can I be learning from this person? Another reason that I want you to look for talent in other people is. You can you can really start to see what you're spending your energy on, Right? Like, I love watching people speak. I love reading poetry. I follow like these four or five accounts on Instagram. They just kind of showed up in my like on the ads and stuff. And I just I just started following them because I love their words. Now, I don't write poetry, But I love words. I love the way people can kind of get make words flow together and touch my soul. And you know what I mean? So it's just like look for the things that start appreciating other people. Start looking for talent in other people. If you have a habit of putting down other people and hating on other people, If you're going to do that, At least use it to look inwards. Right. If you're going to be jealous and hate on somebody else, Be like, Wait a minute, Hold on. Hopefully, After you listen to this training, You're going to be like, Wait a minute. Vosby said to use jealousy and envy as a way to look inwards. So if you're going to get jealous, Turn it around and be like, What am I jealous about right now? Oh, Maybe I want to be doing that. Maybe I don't think I'm good enough and I'm hating on them because I think I could do better than them. Well, Instead of focusing on them, Like that's great. That's like, OK, Fine. You're going to focus on somebody and be like, Oh, Who do they think they are? Turn that right around on yourself, Because this is where the magic happens. This is where you start to see what's lacking in your life and what you want to be doing. But you're not doing it. And that's why you're hating. Because here's what I know. When I'm feeling really good and charged inside and I'm feeling like vibrationally in flow, I am happy for every single person, No matter what. When I'm not feeling good about myself, I mean, I'm still pretty happy for people, But in my lowest of lows, I was happy for people. But I could have been happier. Right. But I wasn't because I was not feeling good on the inside. Right. And so this is an opportunity for you to start to really check in with yourself and be like, Why am I not happy for this person right now? Where am I not feeling fulfilled? Where am I not feeling happy? And also looking look at look at the accounts that you follow on Instagram. Look at the stuff that you read. Look at the information that you like to absorb. Look at what you're drawn towards. And if you and you start being mindful and paying attention to what those thoughts are like, Man, I wish I could be doing that. Great. Get clear on that. Clear on what is the thing that that person is doing that you want to be doing? I'm not asking you to copy anybody. This is not about copying. You are a unique individual, My friend. You do not need to be like everybody else because you have your own fingerprint. You are not put here on this earth to be like anybody else. But it's a great opportunity for you to be asking yourself, What do I want to be doing? What is it about that person that I love? Right. And it could just be an appreciation. But then maybe that appreciation that you have for somebody else's talent, Turn that inwards and be like, Well, What do I appreciate about myself? What do I love about myself? Right. A lot of this is all internal work. It's all about becoming mindful and present with yourself. And I promise the more you do this, You will figure out what your gifts are. And of course, If you need help, I am here and I highly encourage you to reach out there. Anytime somebody reaches out to me, I respond back right away because I know what it feels like to be on the other end. When I first started my business and I had mentors and I invested a lot of money with a lot of people. And I'm really grateful to the people that have helped me and people that I know that are busy and they still give me their time. You know, Whether it's just a quick email or whether I hired someone to work with, Because you're not alone. You're not alone. And you don't have to like spin your wheels trying to figure this out. But if you're the kind of person that feels like, OK, I'm ready to figure out my gifts are and you can use this as a way to really jumpstart that, Use this training. And if you have any additional questions, Please reach out. All right. So the last way that you could figure out what your gifts are is looking at how do you best interact with others. So I love this. I love this so much. So I, I love interacting with people in small groups and I love one on one. I'm an introvert by nature. I mean, I can go out and socialize and stuff like that. And that's cool. But my girlfriends know, Like I don't ever have like a bunch of people over at my house. I have one person at a time and I'll spend three hours with you and I'm good. That's I love interacting with people that way. That's why I work with people one on one. I have online courses, But I love working with people one on one because I get to know you. Right. So just knowing yourself and how you interact with people. And a little added bonus that I'm going to say to that is how do you best interact with people? And what are the conversations usually about? Right. So. Ask yourself this question, Write this down. I love interacting with people in this way. And you can write down in how many of her ways there are, But I'm sure you'll you're going to boil it down to like the one or top two ways and you'll be like. And then I want you to write down. I could talk about blank forever. What is the thing that you can talk about forever? Now, I know the first option that I gave you was to ask your friends, What do they come to you for and what are you asking them for their feedback to, You know, Understand what you're good at. Why do they come to you? But this last one is really for you to start paying attention once again to yourself. How do you like to interact with people? What kind of conversations do you like to have with people? What makes you feel more energized? Right. Like I get tired. Don't get me wrong, But I feel full on the inside. Right. So like I can work with a client and do like a half day with the client. Right. To like map out their course, Map out their curriculum. You know, Prepare for a media interview, Podcast interview. And I'm mentally tired afterwards. Of course. I've just given of myself to another human being fully. But I feel full on the inside. I'm like, Good. I feel good. You know why? Because I'm in my zone. Even after recording this training, I'm going to take a shower and go to bed straight up. But I feel good right now. I feel good because I know that you listening. You're going to get something from this. Right. So like pay attention to how you best interact with other people. And what do the conversations circle around? What can you talk about for hours? What can you read about for hours? But namely with this, How do you best interact with other people? Right. Is it is it in a group setting? Is it when you're walking and talking like and when you're when you're on the phone or if you're in person or you're in small groups, Like what do you talk about? What can you talk about for hours? That's that's really kind of the key point here. OK, So I'm going to reiterate the different ways that you can figure out what your gifts are. I recommend doing all of these and and do them as much as you want until you get your answer. Right. Option one, Ask your closest friends, Clients, Co-workers what they think you're really good at, What they think your strengths are. What do they come to you for? What problem do they know that you can solve? Right. And take it all in. Remember, That was the key. Take it all in. Option number two is to pay attention to when you're most in your zone. So what energizes you? What could you do for hours? What could you do without even losing your focus or your distraction? And this was really this was a challenge. Remember, I said to you, The way that you're going to start to understand and learn when you're most in your zone and what energizes you is by being mindful and being present. And the challenge is, Is to do one thing at a time, No matter what you're doing this week, This week and from here on out, Whether you're making the bed, Whether you're answering emails, Whether you're on the phone, Whether you're cooking, Whether you're watching a movie. Do one thing at a time because you're going to you're going to train your brain to be more mindful. You're going to train your brain to do one thing at a time. The more focused you are on whatever you're doing, The more present you are when you are in your zone. Whatever that is, You're going to realize it because you're like, Holy crap, I feel good right now. But you got to be present and you got to pay attention in order for even for you to even know what that thing is. Okay. Option three is to look at what you loved doing as a child, Right? Ask your mom, Ask your dad, Ask your siblings, Ask anyone that knew you as a child and go through old photo albums and just allow yourself to daydream. Ask, Ask your mom and your dad or your family members who knew you as a child. What did I love doing as a child? And remember what you love to doing as a child is not necessarily your gift. It could be. Okay. So as a child, I loved being in front of the camera. My dad always had a camera on me and I love talking and I loved to make people laugh and love to make people happy. Am I doing some form of that today? Absolutely. Right. But it can also be, Like I said, The example that I use was being in nature. I love being in nature and nature is my access point. It helps me get back to myself. So what did you love doing as a child? That could be your gift. That could also be the thing that you need to do to get your creative juices flowing. Okay. Option four is to look at what actually lights you up now as an adult. And no matter what you've gone through in life. I promise you there was a time in your life that maybe you were lit up. Maybe you don't have a lot of those great memories, But I promise you, You do. And if you don't, First of all, I'm really sorry. And I do understand. But it's not too late. It's never too late. So if you don't know what lights you up as an adult, Guess what? You got the whole you have a blank slate that you're working with. So start taking some classes. Start signing up for things that you've always want to do. You know, Read that book that you've always wanted to take that dance classes you've always wanted to take. Take that art class. Go go meet up with those friends of yours that you've lost touch with or make new friends. Sign up for that workout program. Find out what lights you up. The more you the more you do the things that light you up, The more you will realize what lights you up. Because if you want more in your life, You have to be more. OK, Repeat after me. If I want more in my life, I have to be more. If you want more of your gifts in your life, If you want more passion in your life, If you want to be more lit, If you want more light and energy in your life, You got to be that. And being that isn't always easy. But it's as simple as saying yes to the things that you've been wanting to do and you've been putting it off. So do that thing today. Do that thing that even if you're remotely interested by it, You're like, You know what? I want to do that. Go do it. Go sign up for it. Get a friend to do it with you or do it by yourself. Whatever. Just do it. Option number five, Your beliefs. This one, Like I said, Was a little it can be difficult for people, But I promise you it's it can it's one of the best ways that I know to figure out what your gifts are is to look at what you believe more than anything. Right. So if you believe that all animals deserve to be treated with compassion and so you're vegetarian or you're vegan and you're on a plant based path and diet or whatever, Plant based lifestyle. And you and you believe that maybe your gift is to to to to work with animals. Maybe your gift is to, You know, And you're great at speaking. Maybe your gift is to be an advocate for animal rights. I don't know. But you got what I'm saying here. Look at your beliefs. Look at what you believe in. Right. So at my very core, I believe that every single human being has a gift. Every single human being is put here on this earth for a reason. Every single human being, No matter what they have gone through, No matter their race, Their gender, Their socioeconomic status, There no matter what is a teacher. We are all teachers because we've all gone through life and we've all learned lessons. And it's our job to use those lessons to teach other people. That is my belief. And that is why I do what I do. Right. It makes so much sense when I say it, Doesn't it? So think about your beliefs. Think about the thing that frustrates you the most. I think about the thing that irritates you. Usually you could find because when we get irritated or we're very passionate about something or something kind of rubs us the wrong way. It's usually because we're invested in that. We have a certain belief or a value around that. So pay attention to your beliefs. Option number six is to look at the talent and other people. Right. Look at the Instagram accounts that you follow. Look at the stuff that you love to read. Look at what you're enamored by. Right. Maybe you watch America's, You know, American Idol or The Voice. And maybe you're not necessarily trying to be a singer, But like you love watching people what perform. Get up there and just express themselves. So maybe you love that. Maybe you love watching people express themselves. And maybe that's an opportunity. In fact, It is definitely an opportunity for you to ask yourself, How do I express myself? Right. Just because you watch The Voice doesn't mean you want to be like Mariah Carey. Right. But if you're drawn to certain things, You're like, If you're drawn to people expressing themselves through art, Through their artwork, To their music, To whatever. That's a great opportunity for you to be like, To look at yourself and say, Oh, My God, I'm drawn to this. I love this talent of self expression and other people because I'm not doing that myself. So next time you find yourself hating on being jealous, Being envious. Turn that inwards and ask yourself, Where am I not doing that? What do I need to be doing? Because anytime you find yourself hating on somebody, It's usually because you're not doing that thing or you want to be doing that thing that that person is doing. So pay attention to that. And lastly, Is to look at how you best interact with other people. The energy that you keep will make you or break you hands down. My dad always said, If you roll in the mud with pigs, You get up smelling like doo doo. So look at how you interact with other people. Look at the kind of people that you're allowing into your life. And look at, You know, Do like small groups, One on one groups and and sorry, One on one interactions. But with that being said, What are the conversations usually focused on? What can you find yourself talking about for hours? I know I just kind of went through all seven of these again, But I kind of wanted to kind of drill it into your head that there are different ways that you can find out what your gifts are. So look at how you interact with people. Look at those conversations. Look at the things that you find that you're talking about. And I'm not talking about like superficial conversations. OK, I'm talking about things that make you happy. Like what truly makes you happy. It's time to start paying attention to what actually makes you happy on the inside. OK, And start doing more of that, Because if you want more of helping people in your life and being self expressed and feeling passionate and having a purpose, You got to be more. You got to be more of that. And that requires slowing down, Being patient with yourself, Being present with yourself and being curious and gentle with yourself and doing the work and getting the support. And being honest with yourself and honest with another human being. And that's what I'm here for. So I want to wrap up by saying this. No matter what you've gone through in life, You're here for a reason. If you've ever doubted that, I'm here to tell you, No doubts. You're here for a reason. How do I know that? I never thought I would get out of the hellhole that I was in over the past few years, And I have come out on top. And what I mean by that is I'm not even talking about financially. I'm not even talking about like, Oh, Look at how many followers I have. I'm talking about on the inside. OK, In my worst of times, I had everything on the outside and on the inside I was bro kin. I had a five a day, Five, Five, Five days a week cocaine habit and I drank, I drank like a sailor. OK, And I had to go to rehab for that. You would have never known that looking at me because on the outside I was making six figures. I had my fancy car, I had my beautiful apartment, I had I was traveling. OK, And so I am proof that you could have it all and feel like nothing on the inside. And I'm also proof that even with all of that burnt to the ground and having to build back up and starting over. And it hasn't been easy for me. But let me tell you this. It's easier and it's more rich and fulfilling because on the inside I know exactly who I am and I know exactly why God put me here on this earth. And I want that for you. And you're going to get there. And if you're not already there, You're going to get there. And I'm there for you. And I am there for you. And I am there for you. And I am there for you. And I want you to reach out if you have any questions at all after you listen to this training. If there's any doubts, Any hesitations, Any clarification, You could always sign up to schedule a chat with me. We can talk. Just email me. Vasavi at VasaviKumar. Com. And if you're wondering, Well, Boss, Thank you for this training. Now what do I do? Well, Next step is if you've done this work and you need a little bit more clarity and you just need to bounce it off of somebody who's completely objective. We work together one on one. And if you're curious about how that works, Schedule a time with me. Email me and we'll get that process going. And I'll put the link also below this video and also in the email that you would have gotten. I'll put the link in there as well for you to schedule a time with me. I work with people one on one to figure out what their gifts are. And then after you figure out what your gifts are, How am I going to bring that out into the world? And that's the fun part. It's all fun, Right? Once you figure out what your gifts are, You're like, Awesome. Now what? And there are so many options. But guess what? There's going to be a way that works just for you. And that is a perfect expression and beautiful expression just for you. And that's what I'm here for. So I'm so happy that you got through this training. Do the work. Ask your friends, Your coworkers, Go through all the steps. Make this a fun process for yourself. I am here with you along every step of the way. I am not going anywhere. So thank you so much for listening. If you have any questions, You can email me. If you want to take it further, Schedule a chat with me. We'll talk about options, Working together and see what's best for you based on this. And I can't wait to talk to you. Have a beautiful, Beautiful day, Evening, Wherever you are. And remember, Your life is your greatest teacher. You have learned so much in your life and there are people out there who are waiting for you, Waiting for you. So let's get you clear on what your gift is and let's get that out into the world. Thank you so much. Namaste.

Reviews

You’re awesome! Thank you for giving me a starting point on my new journey to “self”

Applause! Your motivational suggestions are spot on and your conversational delivery easy to follow. I admit to choosing this talk with thought it might be a good reference for a loved one at a critical juncture of life and career options.
In the end I found that even long into retirement from the teaching profession, I still had things to learn. Through social connection I still love to share knowledge and interests, and, thanks to you, I realize my motivation is to be useful.