We've been talking a lot about loss and grief,
And when people say things to us and they make us feel more uncomfortable,
Then they console us.
And if you're not okay,
If you are angry,
Upset,
Going through stages of loss,
Then maybe there's something that we can do for ourselves that we're not getting from other people.
And we can't often expect it from other people.
We get upset with our husband and our wife,
Or our parents,
Or whoever,
Because they're not saying the right things to us.
Our bosses,
Our colleagues,
They're not saying the right things to us.
These are the things I want to hear.
Well,
You are the person that you've been waiting for,
Okay?
And we can say these things to ourselves and we will feel better,
And we won't need anything from them.
And in actual fact,
We'll be the ones that says the things to them when they are feeling down,
And then they will learn from us.
But it starts with us and our practice.
So welcome to your practice.
In the last session of It's Okay to Not Be Okay,
Choosing a comfortable seat.
I've chosen a beautiful sunset seat.
And for you,
You can choose a comfortable chair with two feet firmly on the ground.
That's fine.
Let's take three deep breaths just to settle our mind and settle our body.
Breathing in through the nose.
And slowly exhaling out the nostrils.
And again,
Breathing in through the nose.
And breathing out the nostrils.
And again,
Breathing in through the nose.
Open your mouth and gently sigh that breath out.
Coming out to a normal breath,
Breathing through the nose if you can.
And as we explore ourselves once again with introspection,
We check in with ourselves and it's very seldom we're a 10 out of 10.
If we're a 9 out of 10 or an 8 out of 10,
What is it that's keeping us from being a 10 out of 10?
There's something there.
There's a little bit of fear,
A little bit of anxiety,
A little bit of loss,
Irritation.
There's something there.
And there's a part of ourselves that would love soothing words,
That would love to be recognized,
That would love someone to be compassionate with.
But often we might say to ourselves,
Oh,
Don't be so upset.
Why don't you try this?
We really need to change quickly.
You'll be fine.
It could be worse.
You'll move on.
These things are quite dismissive.
And they're not very kind.
Especially when we're grieving,
We know that when other people say these things,
It doesn't help much.
So finding that place,
And it might be a place within you.
Where is your grief?
Where is your loneliness or your irritation?
Let's find that.
It could be in the body somewhere.
And connect with another part of yourself,
A compassionate part of yourself.
Like a wise grandparent,
Or an uncle or an auntie,
Who says,
My darling,
I'm listening.
I'm here for you.
What is going on?
What would you like to say?
I'm here for you.
Be the change that you would like to see,
In this case,
Listen to.
How would you like to be listened to?
Let's do that for ourselves now.
That part of us might be a little wounded child.
What would they like to say?
Imagine now,
With every inhalation,
Like a warm,
Soothing blanket that surrounds that inner little child.
Soothing and comforting them.
Like your breath,
Slowly wrapping around them,
Providing comfort and safety and warmth.
Telling them,
It's just going to be okay.
I'm here for you.
There are so many parts of us.
We don't need to hide.
Throw away.
Fight with.
Breathe in acceptance and kindness,
Non-judgment,
Open-heartedness.
And in this way,
All our parts come together.
Let's take a deep breath to end this practice.
Breathing in.
Through the nostrils.
And exhaling out the mouth.
