56. If It Doesn’t Challenge, It Doesn’t Change You: Exit Comfort Zone

The comfort zone – where things are easy and involve zero risk – is really an illusion of happiness, for real joy comes from pushing ourselves to explore our true, full potential. Join Michael and Monica as they share tips and tools for pushing through the limitations of our comfort zone and examine the myriad benefits that come with doing so.

Transcript

I am here to create my unique path, A path that nobody has walked before, Nobody has created before, But then only I with my unique abilities, Potential, And that's the most important idea, Can create. Wherever people find themselves today, Let's say in their comfort zone, I can guarantee you that in 20 years from now, If you stay in the same place, You're going to be very uncomfortable because we're not made for that. We are actually made to change, To move, To grow, To be curious. It's another human desire that we all have. And when you don't feed that curiosity, Actually it is a formula for being very upset in life. If I do not push against my comfort zone, I'm not going to be happy because we are in this world to be grown, To become a better human. Welcome to Spiritually Hungry Podcast episode 56. Yes, Very important episode. I'm also excited today to talk about getting uncomfortable on purpose with purpose because that's where the growth, The adventure, Fun and possibilities live. And who doesn't want to live like that? So Michael, Imagine your life is a choose your own adventure story because it is by the way. Every choice leads you to the next choice, Infinite choices branching out into infinite possibilities. Imagine a story where our character, Bardo- Bardo, I love another story. Alison was unavailable because she's still lost trying to chase the moon. Refer to previous episode if you don't understand that one. Poor Alison. So Bardo stands at the precipice of a high cliff. He sees a rope bridge that stretches across the chasm and far in the distance at the other end of the bridge, He can see a small warm glimmer of light. Just as he thinks that it might be the treasure he's been searching for, The mist dissolves into a cold hard rain that stings as it strikes his skin. Choose. Bardo takes a cautious step onto the bridge. Bardo is cold, Shivering and wet and decides the bridge is probably too structurally unsound to hold his weight. And even if it could, Now it's raining and it's probably going to be slippery and that's dangerous. And he'd just go back to the end down the road where he slept last night and have a good meal by the fire, A good night's rest and I think about all of this tomorrow. If Bardo chooses the safest, Easiest path that is going to be the most boring story in the world. Right, Michael? He might survive. See, In my mind, I'm sorry, I don't mean to interrupt the story. He can go back and ask people about the bridge. The bridge will be there tomorrow. You're so cautious. Maybe it wouldn't. Maybe it would wipe out. Well then, Good for Bardo. Let me finish my story. This is your rising Capricorn talking. We want him to choose the bridge. I want him to choose the bridge. But if he's anything like Michael, He's going to go back to the hotel and order room service. Recall the Robert Frost poem, The road less taken where a traveler came to a fork in the road and chose to take the path that looked less traveled. Two roads diverged in a wood and I, I took the one less traveled by and that has made all the difference. So inherently when we're presented with choices, Big and small, We tend to choose the path of least resistance. Right? I think that that's what most people do. In the case of the poem, The more well trodden road, These easier choices we make up keep us in our comfort zone. Our comfort zone is where things are easy, Have dependable outcomes, Are relatively risk-free and don't take too much time or energy. Well, You speak in a second, But Judith M. Bardwick, She wrote danger in the comfort zone and she explains, I really liked this. I hadn't really thought of it exactly like this. She said, The comfort zone is a behavioral state within which a person operates in an anxiety neutral condition, Using a limited set of behaviors to deliver a steady level of performance, Usually without a sense of risk. So we spend a lot of time pursuing things that are comfortable. We make our lives around that. We schedule work, Family, Everything around comfort. And I think that that's why I've often talked about this. People are adverse to change because they spent so much time accumulating all these things, And now they're really comfortable. And the fear of perhaps losing it, But maybe finding joy in the process, Right? They're not happy in the comfort zone, But it's what they know. And they spent so much time getting there and therefore it's really difficult to leave. Absolutely. And I wasn't joking, Although I was laughing when I said in the beginning that I'm very excited for this episode because this is such an important idea and topic. As a matter of fact, The great Kabbalists, Rav Aschlag said that the single differentiator between those souls that enter into this world and accomplish what their soul was meant to accomplish and those who with all the best intentions enter into this world and fail to accomplish what their soul is meant to accomplish is how much they leave their comfort zone, How much they're willing to invest. This ancient word, Which I've mentioned in previous podcasts, Yegia, Hard work beyond our comfort zone. And a few months ago I was giving a lecture and this idea came up and I really love that poem because each one of us, And I think it's important that we view our lives in this way, Each one of us is meant to create a new path. That's why I'm not here to walk in anybody else's path. Yes, I can get wisdom and support and understanding, But I am here to create my unique path, A path that nobody has walked before, Nobody has created before, That only I with my unique abilities and potential, And that's the most important idea, Can create. Now if you think about that, If you really view your life as this creating of a new path, Well think about what paths look like. The well trodden path is the one that doesn't have stones and challenges in it because people, 10 people, 1, 000 people, A million people have walked past it. But if we are meant, That is our unique purpose, Whatever type of life we're living, We need to be creating a new pathway every single day and certainly in the totality of our life. That means necessarily that today as I wake up and I'm creating a new day or a new step in that path that nobody has ever walked, There must be brush and stones, Meaning challenges and difficulties that I have to go through in order to be able to manifest my potential, In order to manifest my unique and personal path never walked before by anybody. And again, If you really, If you have that idea constant in your mind, Then it orientates you in a different way towards life. The question has to be not, Did I have a good day? Did I have a bad day? Was it, You know, Did I do something? Did I not do something? The question we have to ask ourselves is, What challenges did I overcome today? Where did I either push myself or find myself in a situation where I had to remove the brush, I had to remove the stones, I had to remove the obstacles in my path? And if your life is not either proactively, Sometimes we have to find our own, Push ourselves out of our own comfort zone to find that challenge, Sometimes it enters into our lives. But a life that has lived in the comfort zone is simply a life that's not producing a new path, Which is the singular purpose for which we're in this world. What's interesting about what you're saying is that I think that most people stumble upon a path, Right? Like, How did I get here? You know, This is not what I had intended, Right? And so- I wouldn't even call that a path, Life, Right? Well, Yes, But that's the road- And not created- That's the road they're on. Right, Reactive. And then I think to hop onto this other road and this understanding and this consciousness, I think people have to, This is interesting, As we're talking about this, Like, Of course, This is how we're living today. I can tell you 30 years ago, Not how I was living, Right? And it goes against human nature. Right. Nature is honestly the beginning part, Right? That comfort, That security. I think human beings are hardwired for safety, For belonging, For comfort, Right? We want to feel safe and certain. And the way people understand certainty or being certain and the way Kabbalists do are two very different things, Right? Those people are like, Certain is like safe, Secure, Taken care of. Certainty Kabbalistically is really knowing that no matter what things look like, You have to believe, Know that there's something better and something else. And that's that idea of jumping out of this state of existence to really create the life that you want. But for that to happen, You have to know and live and understand that comfort is the enemy of growth. Right. And to be clear, I think we both agree that there is a place for comfort. We're not promoting leaving your home, Giving up your money and living in the uncomfortable world that we're talking about. Right. But you can enjoy the physical world that we're meant to, Right? It's to constantly find new ways to push yourself out of your comfort zone. So I'll give you a few examples from my life that I chose. This is my own choose your own adventure path. So I think that when I really started to direct life in this way for myself is when the first time I fell in love, Which happened to be you, With you. Getting married at 23 after a whirlwind nine months of dating. Got pregnant four times, Including intentionally three months after having Josh, Who was a very scary pregnancy. He has Down syndrome, Jumped into that risk. Moved to New York City with a three month old and three other children in three different schools in a city we didn't know without a support system. And getting our dog, Miles. Wasn't a dog person, Got to say, But he's adorable and lovable. And we're figuring this dog human relationship out and it's working. Miles is a great dog. Miles is awesome. And thank you God, Because I don't think that this would have worked if it was anything other than Miles. But my point is the most profound moments of my life, The most impactful, Life-changing, Fulfilling moments of my life have been the ones that are against my comfort, That are against logic even on some level. And whenever I've chosen that, I always look back. Even what it is a difficult, It's difficult. It's difficult to go against your nature. And our nature as human beings is to see comfort. And again, We differentiated what that means. Of course, We're supposed to enjoy all of the beauties and all the offerings of life and live in a comfortable space and one that gives you joy and happiness and is beautiful 1000%. But this kind of comfort of we had it, For instance, We had a great life in Los Angeles, Very comfortable. And we felt it was so comfortable that we actually were too comfortable in terms of we weren't really fulfilling our potential of what we knew we could do. So we put ourselves in the beginning, Especially in very uncomfortable situations and in the unknown beyond. And I remember at that time when we moved, I was like, This is so hard. This is so difficult. I still believe in why we move, But why is it shouldn't be this hard? But we kept asking the question, Do I still believe in why we're doing this? And the answer is always yes. So we stuck it out and now it's eight years in and we love it. So I think those are the conversations people need to have with themselves. So what I would say to our listeners right now, Even before we go any further and share any more wisdom is that we strongly recommend to ask yourself the question in this day, In this week, What did I do that was beyond my comfort zone? What choice did I make? To differentiate that from, Yes, We are often overwhelmed with life, Which means we are often doing a lot. But it's very different to be doing a lot than to choose to go out of your comfort zone. So I want to be very clear. We're not simply talking about doing things that we, It's a lot. And we all have those days sometimes often where we feel it's a lot, Kids, Family, Work, Whatever it is that we have to accomplish. But the question, If you are to fulfill the purpose of your soul and really reveal your potential in this world, You have to be asking yourself the question, What did I choose to do today that was beyond my comfort zone? What did I choose to do this week that was beyond my comfort zone? And it's interesting, I think- And that will be different for everybody. Right. What they're comfortable getting out of their comfort zone. Oh, Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. We reference a few times and science really talks about this, That historically the reason why we are hardwired to find and seek to maintain comfort is because thousands of years ago when we were not searching for shelter or food, If we did not seek that, Then we'd be very likely to be killed by wild animals, Very likely never to find food, Very likely never to find shelter. So it was a struggle. And therefore hardwired in the Homo sapiens is the concept, I need to make sure that I find a comfortable shelter, That I find comfortable food and so on and so forth. So it's hardwired into us. But it's really old software at this point. Exactly. The problem is that today we live in a very comfortable world, Certainly as it relates to what our ancestors were living through. But what is interesting, The other scientific point here is that there's a concept that's called comfort creep, Which means what was uncomfortable for us yesterday that we found comfort, Now our ability to be uncomfortable becomes less and less all the time. Why is it that certain things that we are not accustomed to a year ago or five years ago, 20 years ago, That we were okay with 20 years ago, But now as we got more and more comfortable, We are no longer comfortable with things that we used to be comfortable. And that's what's called comfort creep, That when we find new places of comfort, What was yesterday uncomfortable is no longer comfortable for us today. It's important to realize that therefore what we're asking ourselves to do and our listeners hopefully to be inspired to do is to go against our, Again, Thousands of year wired history to see comfort. Because certainly, Again, While it is important, Again, To have a comfortable home, To have food to eat and so on and so forth, Not seeking discomfort, Not seeking to go against our comfort zone will limit us to the greatest degrees. And as we said earlier, Will literally make it impossible for us to accomplish the purpose for which we came to accomplish. And I referenced maybe one of my more favorite quotes from the ancient sages from the Talmud, And it says, Lo yagata u'mat sata tamim, Which means if you didn't work hard for something, If you do not push beyond your boundaries and you think you accomplished, Don't trust it. Don't believe it. Yagata u'mat sata, If you worked hard and you pushed against your comfort zone and you accomplished tamim, Then you can trust that it's true that it will be lasting. And so this over 2000 years ago, They made this dark- Wait, But do you think that everybody who has succeeded in something, It's because they pushed beyond their comfort zone? Absolutely. Anything important, Always. Now, Sorry, Anything important that lasts, Absolutely. You can stumble upon- That lasts. Okay, That's the key. Right. That's what you can trust. For me, It was like, Yeah. Okay. Trusting it means it's going to last. And that can only be achieved- Because the foundation is rooted now in truth. We stumble. We and every person can stumble upon something good, Great. There's the famous research that you do into people who win the lottery. The reality is that most people win the lottery- Everything miserable and different. Right. And then they end up with nothing. That's true. Whether they end up with nothing, They end up less happy. And if you didn't work for it and you accomplished it, If you didn't push beyond your comfort zone and you stumble upon something, It's not going to last. It's not going to give you the fulfillment that you desire. Only the processes and the steps that you've taken that go against the comfort zone, Can you trust the accomplishment? Meaning, Will it be fulfilling for you? Will it be lasting for you? I think probably that's why it takes sometimes so long. Because when you really are putting yourself in that situation, You are going against your comfort zone and it's like you show up every day and it's like you're changing and you feel that expansion. You feel those growing pains. Absolutely. But it's interesting because I only thought about this in this moment. Sometimes I'll work on things and it's like, It shouldn't be this thing. It shouldn't be this difficult. But it's true- It should be much more difficult. Well, No, But finding an illustrator for my children's books. It's a year in. Why? I had this thought right before. I was like, Maybe, But it's not supposed to come out now and this is the delay because if not- Maybe you just need to invest more effort. I put a whole lot of effort. No, No, I'm saying- But no, The discomfort is right. It shouldn't just be like, Okay, I'm going to write this book and that book. It has to be really putting that energy into it 100% to manifest it. The truth of the matter is writing the children's books, It was easier than writing other books, Let's say. Right? The uncomfortable part will be the process. Interesting. Then, Thinking about it, Everything that I've really put that effort in so uncomfortable, Thank God it is lasting because it's like the story of the three little pigs. The first pig, He made his house of hay. We're talking about children's books. My head just went there. You know how my brain works. The second one was of wood, I think, And the third was of brick. He spent time and effort. He's uncomfortably sweating. I remember the two piggy brothers were making a barbecue and they're like, Oh, Why are you working so hard? Then we know how the rest of the story, Most of us do. I guess you forgot. He puffed and he puffed, Right? Yes. Right. That idea that in order for it to be real, In order for it to be true, It has to be difficult. It has to be out of our comfort zone. By the way, People are going to remember this next thing to think about the three little pigs. Hopefully. Well, Actually, I know that. . . Do you mind if I share a story? I'm not sure. What is it about? It's actually a kind of scary story. Oh, I like scary stories. Go for it. Yes. This is from a book called The Comfort Crisis, Which I do recommend by Michael Easter, Which very much speaks to a lot of what we're talking about now. I often think it's important, Although we come from a specific tradition, The Kabbalistic tradition to find that these same concepts are in many other ancient traditions. This is a little bit long, But I think it's very interesting. Like Monica said, At the least it probably will help us, Our listeners, Remember this concept because as I said before, This is probably one of the most important questions to ask ourselves all the time. Whether as we parent, As we are in relationships, As we are accomplishing in our work, Anything worthwhile must be done with elements of going outside your comfort zone. Otherwise it will not fulfill its purpose and it certainly cannot last. So this is a little bit long and again, This is from The Comfort Crisis by Michael Easter, But I thought it was both a fascinating story, But also very speaking to- Can't wait to hear it. Yes. There's a Japanese document commissioned by Empress Genmai in the year AD 711. I like the story already. There you go. It's the oldest living document in Japan. It includes myths, Legends, And historical accounts of the Japanese, The formation of the heaven and earth, And the origins of Shinto gods and heroes. The Kojiki's most epic tale spawned Misogi. How do you know you're pronouncing all these words correctly? I hope I am. And Misogi is very much the ancient Hebrew word, Yegia, That intense effort that must be invested into anything worthwhile, Anything that will last. So Izanagi, And again, If I am not pronouncing this, I apologize. Was it- I'm impressed that you're attempting to tell the story. That's great. Yes, Yes. I'm way out of my comfort zone. Yes, Exactly. And I do apologize if I am mispronouncing any analogies. I don't think anybody actually will know. I'm sure there are many people who will. Write in all your complaints to Monica and Michael. Izanagi was a god in the Shinto faith and was married to the Shinto goddess of creation and death. Things were perfect for the two gods until Izanagi's wife died in childbirth. She descended into the land of the dead, The underworld where all Shinto gods go in the afterlife. The Shinto god was wrecked. He wept and slumbered through life until he decided he just couldn't live that way anymore. He made up his mind to venture into the land of the dead to bring back his wife. Isn't that beautiful? I like that. Just that. Izanagi entered a cavern that led into the underworld. There's a movie like that. Right, What Dreams May Come. Yeah. Very, Very good. Very dark movie. I'm going to watch that again actually. Yeah, Go ahead. Yeah, That's true. I wonder if it's very. . . I know. It's very Kabbalistic. I know he is very much Kabbalistic. I think the director studied at the center for a bit. But I wonder if it's also based on this town. So he entered the cavern that led into the underworld. As he journeyed deeper, He encountered a hellish landscape. There were demons, Zombies, And the grotesque figures who wanted to capture him and keep him there for eternity. Despite all of hell working to stop him, Izanagi pushed on and found his wife. But he was terrified to see that she'd succumbed to hell's perils. She was partially decomposed and demonic looking. He realized he'd be next to fall to the underworld's defilements if he didn't escape quickly. So Izanagi made a fantastic break through the caverns of hell. Demons and monsters grabbed at him, Trying to pull him downward. Failure seemed imminent. He nearly gave up, But he dug deep mentally and physically, Kept pushing, And eventually burst from the cavern's entrance. Izanagi then dove into a nearby freezing river to purify himself for the degradations of hell. The experience rocketed him into a state of sumikiri, Pure clarity of mind and body, And removed all his impurities, Weaknesses, And past limits. It made him tougher in mind, Body, And spirit. The state of sumikiri provided by Mizogi, Which is what I believe is the ancient word Yagiya, Is why ancient students of Aikido would immerse themselves in natural bodies of cold water, As the Kabbalists would as well. Waterfall streams or the ocean would wash away their defilements and reconnect them with the universe. More recently, The idea of Mizogi has been applied to other forms of using epic challenges in nature to cleanse the defilements of the modern world. These modern Mizogis offer a hard brain, Body, And spirit reboot. They help their practitioners smash previous limits and deliver the mindful centering confidence and competence the Japanese Aikido followers were also seeking. This leads to Dr. Marcus Elliott, Who's a Harvard physician who took from this practice of Mizogi and great athletes go to him and he helps them. But again, For us and for our listeners, I think this really lays the foundational understanding about life, Which is that life is great to have it. You go day by day within the comfort zone, But if you're not pushing, You're lost in life. What you are meant to accomplish, We will never accomplish. And again, I say this to ourselves. I mean, This guy went all the way to hell to get his wife. Yes. And I'll just get two more quotes from Dr. Elliott Marcus, The Harvard- It's interesting. Do you think that it's because of desire that people will push beyond their comfort zone or do you believe, And maybe it's both, That they believe they're able to, They understand the exercise? I think we're not thinking enough about, And this is why I want to come to this next quote, We live within our comfort zone, Which means we have so much of us. And this is the point. And this, I think maybe it's why I find it so inspiring. As I sit here now, And I'd like to believe that, I'm sure that I've done a lot of very good things in my life so far, But I also know that the potential of what I can still do and what I am still meant to do far, Far, Far outpaces what I've done so far. Well, How do you get there? How do you manifest, Discover, Reveal all that endless potential that is still out there, No matter how much you've accomplished, No matter how much you've done, You have to be pushing beyond your comfort zone because that's where the rest of your potential is. And as I say, I'll just read these two quotes. And then there's also a lot of ancient stories related to this. So Dr. Elliott Marcus says, Most of us live in this small space right here. We have no idea what exists on the edges of our potential. And I think that's a very important statement I'd like to think about every day. And I ask our listeners, I think the edges of our potential. Unfortunately, Most people take where they are today as everything. Right. Right. I think that's a very important point. If you remind yourself every day as you woke up, I've done amazing things. We are not diminishing. And I, Hopefully when I wake up every morning, I do not diminish any important accomplishments, Any important work I've done as a human being, As a teacher, As a father, As a husband, As a friend. But I also know that in all of those areas, There is a lot more concealed than revealed. A lot yet unmet potential. And that's why I must, I must push myself further today out of my comfort zone and tomorrow and the next day. And by not having any idea of what it's like on the edge, Man, We really miss something vital. And I think this is in this way, Again, I will repeat this again and again, Why this idea is so important. Because if humanity, Meaning each individual person, Endeavored by exiting consistently their comfort zone to reveal the potential, Our world would be a much, Much, Much better world. A happier one too. Incomparable, Incomparable. One more quote, Mazogi is not about physical accomplishment. It asks, What are you mentally and spiritually willing to put yourself through to be a better human? But that's what I'm saying. Most people won't take those risks. But I think if it's framed, Why? The question has to be why. Why- I think it's a mix of things. No, No, No. I'm sorry. Sorry. But my comment is, Why am I asking myself today and tomorrow to go out of my comfort zone? Why am I asking our listeners to go out of their comfort zone? Because if you want to be a better person, That means that you have to be accessing what's beyond what you are now. Because who we are now, Be it great or good, To be greater and better, That's beyond your comfort zone. By the way, Wherever people find themselves today, Let's say in their comfort zone, I can guarantee you that in 20 years from now, If you stay in the same place, You're going to be very uncomfortable. Oh, For sure. Because we're not made for that. We are actually made to change, To move, To grow, To be curious. It's another human desire that we all have. And when you don't feed that curiosity, Actually it is a formula for being very upset in life. What you just said is so important. I want to make sure we underscore that. Living on the edge. What happens when you don't, And it's an insidious process, But it is impossible for a person, Be they 20 or 50 or 100, To be fulfilled unless they are consistently living on the edge. Living on the edge, We don't mean taking risks with your life, But we do mean pushing beyond your comfort zone consistently. Very often when we have this conversation with people, We all get into a routine of life and that is very dangerous for ourselves. Forget about anything we're meant to do for the world, Forget about anything outside of ourselves. Our fulfillment resides in pushing always beyond our comfort zone. Living on that, Michael Easter calls it the wild edge. And I think again, I really think that that view of life needs to become fundamental to us because it's not. Again, Because we're really working against our own nature. Our own nature says, No, Wake up in the morning, This whole day, This whole week, This whole month, This whole year, Stay within your comfort zone. And what we're saying is, Listen, If I, Talking to myself, If I do not push against my comfort zone, Find ways, One way, 10 ways today, This week, This month, I'm not going to be happy because we are in this world to be growing, To become a better human. By the way, I think that the gateway for that change, For that profound shift is really curiosity. So I don't want to just move past that quickly. I think when you're really curious about what's on the other side of that, Or if I didn't do the thing I do every day and I did something different, Or if I pick up my family of six and move to New York and it makes no real sense having a newborn to do that, But something's calling me there. It's feeding that curiosity. That is kind of like the lead that takes you, That gets you out of your comfort zone. It's when you actually feed your curiosity. And to bring our puppy Miles up again, No, Because he's constantly learning new things. We're training him a lot and he's always like with his paw, He'll push at things. He's just curious. Yes, It's a puppy kind of behavior, But he's so curious. And then when he discovers it or explores it, He discovered peanut butter this week and his eyes literally turn black because his pupils are so dilated because he's having that stimulation from something that he likes. So now when he sees me, He sees peanut butter and his eyes dilate literally every time. But why? He's curious about something. He's not going to like, He'll taste everything. He'll put his paws in. And then you see him learn new things and that's what we're meant to do actually. We're meant to actually try, Be curious, Feed our curiosity without the fear. And when you do that, You're actually living on that edge all the time. Exactly. And I think that's a beautiful word. And the only thing I would add to that is to be curious about ourselves. And I think this is- Well, Yes, That's what I mean. Miles doesn't have that understanding. He's curious about peanut butter. But the point is, If you begin the thought process with the understanding, I don't know who I am yet. And again, I've lived 48 amazing years and hopefully I've done some really great and important things. But who I am left to discover, I'm really excited to discover that. And I know that it is so much more than anything yet. But that's the knowing. You have to know that that's possible and that's also your destiny. Right. But to be curious and therefore desire to live on edge because I want to discover what's new. And again, It's important to understand that if you're not doing that, If you're not doing that, You are not going to both accomplish the purpose of which you came to this world nor be happy. You know what I often say to people that I work with and they're really kind of stuck and they're uncomfortable, But they're comfortable and their discomfort is, Where do you want to see yourself in a year from now and five years from now and 10 years from now? And usually it's very different from where they are today. And that kind of- Although I've had some terrifying conversations where people were very much wanted to remain where they are today. But yeah. Those are not the people I'm meeting with. But- Hopefully. . . . They're coming with the specific, I've set up the conversation to be, Where are you stuck and let's change this. And so once they put it out there, I'm like, Okay, So what do you need to do today, Tomorrow, Each day differently? And we make lists each week, Your to be list versus your to do list, Which I've talked about a lot, In order to be able to manifest the you in a year from now or the you in five years from now and what that life looks like. And I think when you take actionable steps like that, Really understanding that it's not like day after day and then you get into this robotic existence. And before you know it, 15 years have gone by. This way, When you really approach each day, Which is each week, Which is each year, Right? And you're really focused on who you want to become, Then life starts changing for you. Absolutely. And again, In the Bible, There are many stories beginning with the patriarch Abraham. There's a ancient word, Which is called nissayon, Which literally means test. And if you read the biblical stories, You find that no great spiritual soul ever grew without these tests, These tests that allowed them to overcome great challenges. Why? Because, As we said before, We are greater than who we are, A thousand fold, But the only way that those greater levels of us manifest is through going out of our comfort zone. So when you, And that's why for instance, Abraham, It says that for him to become the Abraham who brought wisdom to the whole world, He had to go through 10 unbelievable tests because it was those tests, Those challenges, Those going outside the conscious decision to leave his comfort, The conscious decision to go outside of what he knew is what allowed him to become who he became. And that idea that in order to become more than you are, You have to go through challenges and those challenges hopefully are choices that we make to go beyond our comfort. So I'll share with you an interesting story. Today is what? Today's Tuesday? Whatever. Whatever day we're recording. Thanks. Yeah. And I just came back from Israel. I was there, It was one year since my mother left this physical world. And so I went to visit her in Israel. And it was also a fast day. So I was fasting all day. And in the afternoon we went up to the north of Israel where she's varied. And so usually when you fast, You don't have as much energy as usually because when you don't fast. But I was in that mountain, She's buried with- Well, I can't argue that, But it depends on how you fast and how you prepare yourself. But anyway, Yes. Okay. Let's say that's true. Monica has more energy when she fast than she has. Me, I have less energy. And it was very hot. Anyway, So we get to the north of Israel where my parents are and they are at the bottom of a mountain. And on the top of the sort of midway in that mountain, There's also a group of another great Kabbalists, Dari, Who I like to go visit. He actually was one of my mother's favorite Kabbalists who lived about 400, 500 years ago. So we get there, It's maybe 6, 30 or 7. And I decide, I'm going to go up the mountain. And I literally asked myself the question, Am I going to walk slowly or am I going to run up the mountain? And I decided I was going to run up the mountain. I'm very impressed, Michael Bird. You're welcome. So I run up the mountain, I make my connection, And then I run down the mountain. And I had so much energy after running up and down the mountain that no hunger, No thirst, And that's tremendous burst of energy. Again, Simple story. You were a little late for the rest of us. I was a little bit late. But the idea is this, And this I think is really the overarching idea. Energy, Fulfillment, Revelation of our potential can only happen when we're pushing in small ways and great ways beyond our comfort. Yeah, That's great. Right. You always get more than you anticipated when you got out of your comfort zone. Always, Always. That's a great analogy and story for that, For sure. I'm trying to think. Well, So that was one. I'm trying to think when I have gone out of my comfort zone where it's been like, Well, I think the first time I publicly spoke way out of my comfort zone, Way out. Gosh, I was terrified. Right. And had you stayed within the confines of your comfort? I just couldn't have. I am not made up of that. But I did. I sat there for a year. It's funny because I was looking through things today I saw when I told the story and it was actually I always knew that spreading the wisdom of Kabbalah and helping people in their process and making people's lives better, My own life better was my purpose and mission. And so, When I found the center, I was so young and so being involved with marketing and spreading the wisdom in that way was fulfilling for me. And then there came a point where it really wasn't. So, I never questioned my calling, But I was like to sit behind this desk really every day to come to this. It just doesn't seem. . . I have something to say and I really want to connect with people. But the discomfort of doing that, To speak publicly and I wasn't sure about what I was saying. I felt insecure. And also, I had a lot of opposition. And you really helped me with that because I remember after a year of going back and forth about this, A year, You finally pulled me aside and you said, Monica, Many people like to see you sit behind this desk for the rest of your life. But if you feel like there's something else you're meant to do, Go do it. And I finally had the courage to do it. I inspired you. You did. And I really, I pushed against that discomfort. It wasn't overnight. I was uncomfortable for a good two years when I would speak in public. But then by the way, That shift wasn't just, Okay, Now I'm comfortable speaking in public, But it also, The change that occurred was I don't really care what people think. Right? If I can just help one soul, It's worth it. The growth in who I became in that. The benefits of becoming uncomfortable are beyond anything. It's not- And they're also unimaginable. You have no idea how far and wide and deep you can grow. And that's how we live our lives. Where we are today, Certainly, I don't want to be this person. I love myself. I love my life, But I certainly don't want to be this version of me and that this be my life 10 years from now. I want it to be far greater, More expansive, More deep and wide. So I mean, That's the point really. So we have some more to say on this very important topic. We'll do a part two guys. We'll do a part two. We're going to make you really uncomfortable. Please make sure to send your questions and comments. Any comments about how I told the story before and anything else? Questions or stories you want to share with us, Send all your comments to monicaandmichaelatkabala. Com. And Alison Mbarra. Yes. And make sure to go to Apple Podcasts, Five stars. Great reviews. Share this podcast with anybody and everybody you know. And as we said, This is such an important topic. I'm really excited both with everything we shared and tell now and everything we're going to share for next week's podcast because I promise you, And this is again proven and for myself as well, That who we are going to become, Who we are meant to become can only be reached to the degree that we're consistently going beyond our comfort. So be uncomfortable by sharing this podcast with absolutely anybody and everybody that you know. And we hope that you are inspired by what we shared today to push against your comfort zone. And we hope you enjoyed listening to this podcast as much as we enjoyed recording. Bye. Bye.