Mindfulness & Loving-Kindness For Self

Using Mindfulness & Loving-Kindness (also known as Metta), Shelby leads you through a guided remedy for when you're being hard on yourself and in need of self-love. This meditation can be done sitting, standing, or lying down.

Transcript

And find a way to sit that you can be comfortable,

Not too rigid,

A way to be where your breath can be easy.

You can be sitting,

You can be lying down,

You can even be standing,

Whatever works for you.

And as you arrive here,

Take a few full breaths,

Feeling yourself landing in this moment in your body.

And after you've taken some full breaths,

Go ahead and just let your body breathe you.

See how your breath wants to be today.

In this moment,

It'll change throughout the practice.

So settle into your body,

Feel your feet on the ground,

Your seat sinking in to the support beneath you.

Feel the eyes,

The throat,

The shoulders,

Soften the heart and the belly,

The pelvic floor,

The sitz bones,

The muscles around the sitz bones,

Sinking in,

Settling and melting.

Let the legs be heavy and soft.

Find a way,

Bring awareness to your heart,

Your emotional heart,

Your energetic heart,

Your physical heart.

Let your attention rest there gently.

And as each breath comes in and out,

You can even imagine that breath is going in and out through your heart center.

Soft and easy breath.

And notice what happens as soon as you bring your attention to your heart.

Feel the physical sensations.

And maybe if there are any stories about the sensations there,

Just see if you can put them aside and simply observe how it feels,

What the experience is in your body around your heart.

Is it heavy or light?

Is there ease or tension?

Does it feel numb?

Sore?

Open?

Maybe there's a temperature to your heart.

You can also notice the movement in your heart if that space is moving with each inhale and exhale.

And if thoughts arise,

Simply allow them to go into the background and bring the focus of your attention right there into your heart center,

Experiencing your body,

Your breath.

And whatever is happening in there,

See if it's possible to welcome it,

To say hello,

Even if it feels a way that you don't think it should be feeling.

See if you can drop the judgments and the shoulds and the expectations and just hold a sweet space for whatever is here.

Everything is welcome.

Use your exhales to drop more and more into experiencing your heart center,

Letting go any rigidity or holding.

And if you can't let go,

Simply just let it be.

Let it be how it is.

No need to try to fix it or figure it out.

Just holding some gentle space for what's arising.

You might notice emotions arise.

You can simply observe them and just the same as we do with the sensations,

Welcome them,

Say hello,

But don't get lost in the story or commenting on them or trying to figure them out.

Just say hello.

Welcome them for tea.

And you might notice now that you've given yourself some time and space to let your body settle,

Let your mind settle a bit,

Maybe you have a little bit more connection with the earth beneath you.

Maybe you can feel the sensations in your heart a little bit more.

And if neither of those are true,

It's completely fine.

Our experiences are changing constantly.

So you really can't have expectations for how it's supposed to be.

That is what causes stress.

That's what causes suffering.

So the more we can accept this moment just as it is,

The easier it is to be here with ourselves in a gentle way.

You might put a hand on the heart or a hand on the belly.

You might put a hand on both.

Notice what it's like to have that contact there.

Feeling the warmth of your hands and the pressure.

Feeling your body come out to meet it.

And if you've chosen to put your hands on your heart or your belly with each exhale,

You can't even imagine your hands sinking into your body a bit.

Thanks for your time today.

Feel your whole body breathing.

Let your breath experience itself.

And if at any point the body becomes restless or in pain for this practice,

And honestly for most practices,

It's okay to shift a little,

But do it mindfully and slowly,

Feeling the sensations change as you find a new way to be that's supportive.

And then what I'll invite you to do is begin wishing yourself words of kindness,

Offering Metta or loving kindness,

Friendly warm wishes to yourself.

And you can use these phrases or you can create your own.

And if you do keep them simple,

And maybe only choose about three or four.

You can imagine yourself sitting across from yourself and wishing you these words.

You can imagine yourself as a child wishing you these words.

You can play with it and really make it your own.

May I be happy.

May I be healthy and strong.

May I be safe.

Free from inner and outer harm.

May I be at ease.

And continue imagining your breathing in and out through your heart center.

As you say these phrases to yourself.

May I be happy.

May I be healthy and strong.

May I be safe,

Free from inner and outer harm.

May I be at ease.

As you repeat these phrases or your own,

You can even visualize yourself in these ways.

Really imagine yourself happy,

Healthy,

Safe,

At ease.

Feeling it in every cell of your body.

And as you feel it,

Experience it as though it's happening right here,

Right now.

So that your body can start to memorize how this feels.

And then you'll recognize it more and more as it shows up in your life as you become more mindful to your experiences.

This practice can be really alive and juicy for a lot of people.

A lot of people can feel it in their heart with a lot of joy and appreciation.

And for many people it can feel flat or dry,

Not a lot of sensation.

Either is perfectly fine.

And you might find that even if you stay with it when it feels dry,

Numb,

Over time something starts melting away.

And the kindness begins to develop.

So I'll really encourage you to stay with the phrases even if they feel awkward or uncomfortable with the intention of coming into deeper and deeper connection with yourself,

Deeper and deeper love and friendliness.

Thank you.

Sometimes I'll shorten the phrase and simply say the word happy,

Healthy,

Strong.

Safe,

At ease.

Please.

Continuing to observe the sensations in your heart,

The emotions and any thoughts that arise and welcoming them,

Saying hello,

Without needing anything to be different.

Simply staying present with what's here and when you get distracted,

Ever so gently coming on back,

Being here with yourself in as kind of a way as possible.

Really giving yourself presence is the act of love.

Metta,

The Pali word for loving kindness,

Can be offered inwards to ourselves,

Or outwards to all beings.

And often there's kind of a sequence or structure where we first offer it to ourselves because we have to fill ourselves up to the brim with all of the love inside of us in order to authentically and genuinely offer it out to the world.

In Western culture,

We're often conditioned to give and give and give without remembering ourselves.

And so here we come home first,

Nourish ourselves so that we are so overflowing with connection with ourselves,

Contact,

Love,

That it's easy,

That Metta towards all beings,

Towards difficult people,

Towards people we love,

Towards people we don't know,

Towards animals and the Earth.

That comes naturally and overflowing in a really easy way when we offer ourselves this care.

But when we miss this step,

It becomes more empty and depleting.

So really,

I really encourage you to stay here with you,

Offer yourself this care,

This sweet young one in you,

All these little kid parts of us.

You need our presence,

You need us to stay with them,

No matter what.

So here we're cultivating a loving connection right here.

Thank you.

Staying in connection with your heart and whatever's here.

Send some of your attention out to the sounds in your room,

Your space that you're in.

Feeling yourself held by this place and connected to the Earth,

Connected to your surroundings.

Let go of the Metta practice,

The loving kindness practice.

Just sit here for a moment.

Feeling your breath,

Your body,

And this place you're in.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Reviews

I was gifted the opportunity to sit with and guided by Shelby in meditation practices through this past spring and summer. My practice has grown having been informed by her compassion and instruction. So grateful to have found that familiar and comforting voice here on insight timer!!

Perfect. This metta is perfect for people healing and needing to self care & replenish before going back to a full Metta practice 👌🏾

Good narrative - I really enjoyed the succinct yet thorough explanation of 'Metta,' or loving kindness.

Excellent - don't let the sound dissuade u from giving this wonderful meditation a try

So difficult to allow myself to focus on myself and nurture myself. This meditation was very helpful! Thank-you muchly.

Very quietly focusing. Thanks!

Thank you. Beautiful meditation guidance.

Thank you Shelby for helping me start my day with some positivity and self kindness ❤️

Hard going my mind too stressed but will practice again . Feeling the benefit thank you

Wonderful, thank you.

I am grateful for this, Shelby. Thank you!

Very relaxing, thank you

Centering and soothing. Thank you!