This meditation is on calling up the difficult emotions that might surround your thoughts around feeling like an imposter or a fraud or as if you don't know enough or that you're not worthy to do the work that you do.
So sit comfortably or lie down if that feels better for you with your eyes opened or closed.
And if your eyes are open,
Just allow your gaze to soften onto a single point.
And if your eyes are closed,
Allow your gaze to soften into the darkness behind your eyelids.
Center your attention on the feeling of your breath and your body.
So just notice your natural,
Normal,
Cyclical breath in and out.
And feel into the sensations of your body as it meets the earth below you.
Recognize just how you feel in this moment.
As you continue to follow your breath in and out,
If you encounter any tension through your physical body,
See if you can soften and relax those areas,
In particular the muscles around your face,
Your jaw,
Your neck,
Your shoulders.
And after a few moments of following your breath in and out,
Intentionally bring to mind any troubling feeling or emotion that might associate itself with feeling like a fraud or an imposter,
Any self-doubt.
Maybe it involves a situation,
A current situation or from the recent or distant past.
There might be a scenario that holds a lot of emotion for you,
A scenario that you play out in your head and doubt yourself.
Take a moment to really recall the situation,
The scenario and the emotions.
This likely won't be comfortable,
But stay with it.
Realize how you feel in your body.
Are there any sensations that accompany the emotions of feeling like you're an imposter,
Of feeling like you don't know enough,
Those feelings of self-doubt?
How does it feel when you believe that?
When those negative thoughts start to creep into your mind,
Into your narrative and question your value,
Your worth and what you're able to deliver to the world.
What bodily sensations accompany these thoughts,
These emotions?
Feel into your body and notice where these emotions and feelings might reside in physical sensation.
Do they reside somewhere in your body?
Do they have a place that they live?
Notice how you're breathing in this moment.
If the breath becomes shallow,
If your mouth becomes dry,
If your jaw tenses and your teeth clench,
Observe whatever is happening in your body as you recall these difficult and uncomfortable sensations and thoughts.
If you can feel these emotions,
These thoughts manifesting as sensation in your physical body,
This gives you a starting place to disengage from the story that you might tell yourself,
That inner narrative and observe how the emotion can change,
How the sensations can change.
So now bring your focus into the part of the body where those sensations are the strongest.
There's nothing that you need to do about them except become aware of them,
Really place your attention on them.
Now once you really have a clear picture and you're really connected with whatever it is you feel,
Say to yourself,
It's okay,
Whatever it is,
It's okay.
Give yourself permission to feel in whatever kind of way you need to feel right now without getting caught up in it.
Stay with the awareness of the feelings in your body,
Your relationship and reaction to them.
Let them be.
Soften and open up to them.
And as you sit with them a while,
Recognize if the sensations change.
And how do the sensations change?
Perhaps your breath starts to ease into its natural rhythm again.
Maybe any tension that has arisen through the face or through the jaw,
The throat can soften.
And remember that often what you're feeling is not just one emotion.
You might not be able to name them exactly,
But you feel them.
Notice all of the different things you feel.
And are there any positive thoughts that are mixed in or challenging?
The self-doubt,
The story.
Continue to stay with the feelings and allow yourself to untangle them.
And as you untangle those thoughts and stay connected with whatever it is you feel,
Rather than running away from it,
By staying in this place of acknowledgement,
Perhaps it'll lead you to realize that what you thought was this wall blocking you in your mind,
This story,
This limiting belief,
Is a constantly shifting combination of emotions and thoughts and past and imagination.
And the perception alone of recognizing what these things are,
Which is just thought,
It's not reality and often not even rooted in any truth,
It might even make these feelings more manageable,
More bearable.
You might notice yourself trying to resist the emotions or the bodily sensations that accompany these stories by pushing them away or trying to feel ashamed of them.
Or perhaps you find yourself getting sucked into them,
Really feeling like the story is truth even though you know it's not.
Perhaps you replay perceived failures or disappointments in your head to justify your thoughts.
Perhaps these emotions really start to upset you even more,
Become uncomfortable.
And realize that's okay too.
It's a part of your experience.
You can become aware of how you're relating to what you feel,
How your body reacts,
What blends of emotions accompany these thoughts,
What stories you might tell yourself.
And maybe even mixed in with all of that emotion,
Maybe even mixed in you have these fleeting moments of truth,
Of recognizing that your purpose,
Your why,
Your passion is much bigger than these doubts.
If at any point you start to feel overwhelmed by emotion,
Use your awareness of your breath to anchor you back into reality,
Back into your body,
Back into the present moment.
And if you find yourself thinking,
I will always feel this way,
I wish I could stop but it'll never change,
Return to the simple truth of the moment.
Sit and be aware of your breath.
Find yourself that this emotion is temporary and it's not the total sum of who you are.
It's just a small little piece,
A small expression of some sort of insecurity or doubt.
Come back to the breath and remember everything changes with the breath.
Take a deeper inhale,
Slowly exhale out through your mouth.
And again inhale,
Breathe in a little bit more deeply and exhale slowly out through your mouth.
And allow with each exhale for your body to soften,
The tension to release.
And now start to remember your why,
Your purpose,
Why it is you do what you do,
Even when met with limiting beliefs and tall tales,
Feeling like an imposter or a fraud or as if you were going to get found out.
Realize how that's not true,
You're not a fraud,
You're not an imposter.
Lead from your heart,
Lead with truth.
Be willing to take in new information,
Be willing to assimilate new truths into what you already know.
And never give up on growing and evolving.
Give yourself permission to not know everything.
Give yourself permission to set realistic expectations.
Give yourself permission to make mistakes and permission to grow.
Extend to yourself the same grace that you would extend to someone that you love.
And when you are ready,
Slowly open your eyes,
Take a deep breath,
Exhale slowly release.
And remember throughout your day or when encountered with a situation that ignites that self-doubt,
The self-talk that isn't helpful within your mind,
That by bringing it out into the light,
Airing it out,
Acknowledging it,
Feeling it,
Questioning it,
And reminding yourself of who you are and why you do what you do.
Stay deeply grounded and resolve to not give up.
