Good evening beautiful souls and welcome to tonight's reading of In the Nursery by Hans Christian Andersen.
So find yourself in a comfortable position,
Stretch out in your bed,
Let your muscles know that it's time to relax,
There's nowhere that you have to go and there's nothing that you have to do now,
It's time to rest.
Stretch your arms up above your head,
Take a big old yawn,
Easing any tension out of your jaw and bring your awareness to this moment,
Paying attention to any sounds you might hear,
Bringing your awareness to your breath,
Noticing where you feel it the most,
Your chest,
Your stomach,
Do you notice it coming in and out on the end of your nostrils and just arriving here now in this moment,
Feeling your body becoming heavy as it gets ready to relax and when you're ready we'll begin with tonight's story.
In the nursery.
Father and mother and brothers and sisters were gone to the play.
Only little Anna and her grandpapa were left at home.
We'll have a play too,
He said,
And it may begin immediately,
But we have no theatre,
Cried little Anna,
And we have no one to act for us.
My old doll cannot,
For she is a fright,
And my new one cannot,
For she must not rumple her new clothes.
One can always get actors if one makes use of what one has,
Observed grandpapa.
Now,
We'll go into the theatre.
Here we will put up a book,
There another,
And there a third,
In a sloping row.
Now three on the other side.
So now we have the side scenes.
The old box that lies yonder,
Maybe the back stairs,
And we'll lay the flooring on top of it.
The stage represents a room,
As everyone may see.
Now we want the actors.
Let us see what we can find in the plaything box.
Here's a pipe head and yonder an odd glove.
They will do very well for father and daughter,
But those are only two characters,
Said little Anna.
Here's my brother's old waistcoat,
Could that not play in our piece too?
Well it's big enough certainly,
Replied grandpapa.
It shall be the lover.
There's nothing in the pockets,
And that's very interesting,
For that's half of an unfortunate attachment.
And here we have the nutcracker's boots,
With spurs to them.
Row,
Dow,
Dow,
How they can stamp and strut.
They shall represent the unwelcome wooer,
Whom the lady does not like.
What kind of play will you have now?
Shall it be a tragedy or a domestic drama?
A domestic drama please,
Said little Anna,
For the others are so fond of that.
Do you know one?
I know a hundred,
Said grandpapa.
Those that are most in favour are from the French,
But they are not good for little girls.
In the meantime,
We may take one of the prettiest,
For inside they're all very much alike.
Now I shake the pen.
So here's the play.
Bring,
Bran,
Span,
New.
Now listen to the play bill.
And grandpapa took a newspaper and read as if he were reading from it.
The Pipe Head and the Good Head,
A family drama in one act.
Characters.
Mr.
Pipe Head,
A father.
Mr.
Waistcoat,
A lover.
Miss Glove,
A daughter.
Mr.
Deboots,
A suitor.
And now we are going to begin.
The curtain rises.
We have no curtain,
So it has risen already.
All the characters are there,
And so we have them at hand.
Now I speak as Papa Pipe Head.
He is angry today.
One can see that.
Snick,
Snack,
Schnurr,
Buzzle,
Yurr.
I'm master of this house.
I am the father of my daughter.
Will you hear what I have to say?
Mr.
Deboots is a person in whom one may see one's face.
His upper part is of Morocco,
And he has spurs into the bargain.
Schnickle,
Schnackle,
Schnack.
He shall have my daughter.
Now listen to what the waistcoat says,
Little Anna,
Said grandpapa.
Now listen to what the waistcoat says,
Little Anna,
Said grandpapa.
Now the waistcoat's speaking.
The waistcoat has a lay-down collar and is very modest,
But he knows his own value and has quite a right to say what he says.
I haven't a spot on me.
Goodness of material ought to be appreciated.
I am of real silk and have strings to me.
On the wedding day,
But no longer.
You don't keep your colour in the wash.
This is Mr.
Pipe Head who is speaking.
Mr.
Deboots is watertight,
Of strong leather and yet very delicate.
He can creak and clank with his spurs.
But they ought to speak in verses,
Said Anna,
For I've heard that's the most charming way of all.
They can do that too,
Replied grandpapa.
And if the public demands it,
They will talk in that way.
Just look at little Miss Glove,
How she's pointing her fingers.
Could I but have my love,
Who then so happy as Glove.
Ah,
If I from him must part,
I'm sure it will break my heart.
Bah!
That last word was spoken by Mr.
Pipe Head.
And now it's Mr.
Waistcoat's turn.
Oh Glove,
My own dear,
Though it cost thee a tear,
Thou must be mine,
For Holger Danksch has sworn it.
Mr.
Deboots hearing this,
Kicks up,
Jingles his spurs and knocks down three of the side seams.
That's exceedingly charming,
Cried little Anna.
Silence,
Silence,
Said grandpa.
Now Miss Glove sings her great song with startling effects.
I can't see,
Hey ho,
And therefore I'll crow,
Kikariki in the lofty hall.
Now comes the exciting part,
Little Anna.
This is the most important in all the play.
Mr.
Waistcoat undoes himself and addresses his speech to you,
That you may applaud,
But leave it alone,
That's considered more gentile.
Mr.
Waistcoat sees the old Pipe Head and put him in his pocket.
There he lies,
And the waistcoat says,
You are in my pocket,
You can't come out till you promise to unite me to your daughter,
Glove,
On the left.
I hold out my right hand.
That's awfully pretty,
Said little Anna.
And now the old Pipe Head replies.
Though I'm all ear,
Very stupid I appear,
Where's my humour?
Gone,
I fear,
And I feel my hollow sticks not here.
Ah,
Never,
My dear,
Did I feel so queer.
Oh,
Pray let me out,
And like a lamb led to slaughter,
I'll betroth you,
No doubt,
To my daughter.
Is the play over already?
Asked little Anna.
By no means,
Replied Grandpapa,
It's only all over with Mr.
Deboots.
Now the lovers kneel down and one of them sings.
Father,
And the other,
Come do as you ought to do,
Bless your son and daughter,
And they receive his blessing,
And celebrate their wedding,
And all the pieces of furniture sing in chorus.
Clink,
Clanks,
A thousand thanks,
And now the play is over,
And now we'll applaud,
Said Grandpapa.
We'll call them all out,
And the pieces of furniture too,
For they are of mahogany.
And it's not our play just as good as those which the others have in the real theatre.
Our play is much better,
Said Grandpapa.
It is shorter,
The performers are natural,
And it has passed away the interval before tea time.
