Taking Up Space

'Taking up space' isn't about being loud, domineering, or self-centred. It's about claiming your right to exist fully — to share your voice, your ideas, your needs, and your presence without apology. For many women, the opposite has been quietly rewarded throughout life: being agreeable, accommodating, invisible. This lesson begins to unpack why that is — and why it no longer serves you.

For many women, using their voice has historically come with a cost — being labelled 'difficult', 'aggressive', 'emotional', or 'too much'. Even if you haven't experienced direct punishment for speaking up, you've likely absorbed the cultural message that a woman's worth is partly tied to how palatable she is. Understanding this isn't about blame. It's about context. When we understand why the fear exists, we can start to separate the old programming from our present reality.

Our posture, movement, and physicality are not just reflections of how we feel — they actively shape how we feel. Research by social psychologist Amy Cuddy and others has highlighted how body language influences not just how others perceive us, but how we perceive ourselves. When we habitually make ourselves physically small — crossing our arms, hunching forward, hovering in doorways — we reinforce the internal message that we don't fully belong in the space we're occupying. Today, we will look at how we can change this. How we physically take up space.

For women, the cost of saying 'no' has historically been high: social disapproval, being labelled cold or difficult, loss of connection or status. This means many women have learned to over-accommodate — to shrink their needs, explain themselves exhaustively, or say yes when every part of them means no. The result is a life that's shaped more by other people's comfort than by your own values and needs. Boundaries change that. Today, we change our relationship to boundaries.

Taking up space is not a switch you flip. It's a practice you return to — especially in moments of stress, comparison, self-doubt, or when old environments trigger old patterns. You will have days where you shrink again. That's not failure. That's being human. The difference now is that you'll notice it — and you'll know what to do. The noticing is everything. Today, we look at common triggers that make us slip back into old patterns and make ourselves small.