Spiritual Awakening & Consciousness

Experience Her Infinite Compassion! With her signature humor and ability to put words to vague perceptions and feelings, together with her healing touch, Premasudha's work is life-changing. She has a truly great knack for assisting people out of the emotional prison of their ego/intellect into true freedom. This means that sometimes even serious diseases disappear too, as part of the emotional shift into a new more love-based understanding.

Transcript

Peace be upon you all.

As-salamu alaykum.

This is your host,

Farah Sazana,

With another episode of Aghaheel.

Today,

I have invited someone really special who is based in Canada,

But does a lot of healing work around the globe.

She is a very spiritual person who has authored 12 books on various subjects related to psychological well-being,

Spirituality,

And consciousness.

She does a lot of healing work and is a spiritualist and a shaman,

And we will explore further about the work that she does in helping people connect with their inner self and getting over physical and emotional pain through spirituality.

Prem Soodah Janet Holt,

Thank you so much for joining us today and a big warm welcome to Aghaheel.

Well,

Thank you and thank you for having me.

I'm very excited.

So I have so much to talk to you about and you've authored 12 books and even if you could just pick one book and talk about that,

That would take several hours.

So I'm just going to request you to kind of first explain about the nature of the work that you do and how it helps people in finding healing when they're going through difficult periods in their life.

Well,

Of course,

This is difficult to put into words in a way,

But if you think of,

Say,

An Aboriginal culture and the reverence for nature and the simplicity of their lifestyle,

And then think of a highly complex,

You know,

21st century culture.

This work marries the two so that we can function very simply and in truth,

Like the Aboriginals,

And at the same time,

Function in this much more complex intellectual way that our cultures are entertaining at this time.

It's quite a leap because most of us leave the simple Aboriginal aspects of our humanity behind.

Yes,

And this is again part of why there's this great unhappiness and mental instability,

Because it's like trying to leave the mammal behind and just function from the intellect and this won't work.

We're mammals.

We're very bright mammals,

But spiritual beings.

Yes.

Yes.

And our bodies contain,

In my experience,

They contain cells of our bodies carry our divine nature.

And at the same time,

Ourselves also carry our imprinting and our emotional complexes,

Our fears,

Even tension,

You know,

That we talk a lot about tension,

It's,

It's not really understood that our tension is actually it's a form of fear.

It's fear in our bodies,

It's fear of our true nature,

And it expresses this tension.

So,

This work will strengthen our connection to truth in ourselves.

And it will weaken or starve the ego and the complexes.

And these complexes,

Often when they're coming up to clear they often make themselves known through pain.

We feel like we've got a sore tummy or our shoulders hurt.

Yes.

Or we have a headache.

Talking about headaches,

You mentioned that headaches can be the result of emotional conflict,

And sometimes often what we're going through in life takes the form of physical ailment or mental ailment,

But the root cause is quite in depth,

In the sense that it's in your unconscious self maybe or you subconscious and you may not be aware of what's causing it.

That's it.

The,

You know,

The emotional conflict that causes a headache.

It might be the root of it might be in something that happened to you when you were four years old,

Where suddenly you,

You,

Maybe something happened in your family,

Or,

You know,

At preschool and you,

You've got shocked a bit,

And you lost some trust.

So,

When a situation comes up in your adulthood,

Where you have an opportunity to recover that trust to move back into more trust,

You might get a headache,

Because there's sort of like,

Well which am I going to stand with the fear or the trust.

And sometimes when our crown chakra is opening into more trust of the divine and trust that God truly exists and truly loves us.

We,

We might get a headache.

Because we're a little bit.

We're quite,

We're not quite sure whether that's really true or not.

We might say our prayers,

Everything but you know when push comes to shove,

We might feel sometimes not left by the Creator.

So we get a headache,

I got lots of headaches as I was clearing my connection to truth,

Lots of them.

Wow.

That seems to be quite relevant for people,

Especially who are experiencing something on a very,

Like,

Quite a deep level.

And they may not be conscious of why they are feeling in a certain way,

What triggers certain emotions.

So how can you be aware of the things that lie within our unconsciousness or subconsciousness,

How can we be aware,

How can we connect.

Yeah,

This is it.

This is seems to me the human races learning curve.

We're,

We're all having to go more inside and some cultures are more inner than inner focus than others already.

The more we're in a like extroverted materialist focus like in North America,

The more challenging it is to learn how to turn inward.

You know,

I remember a teacher of mine saying to me,

You know,

Premise,

You have to genuflect to the mystery,

You have to,

You know,

Bow down to the fact that you,

You don't know that you can't figure everything out with your little head.

You know,

The more.

The more devoted you are to the inner search.

The more and the more you pay attention and and put it first in your life.

The more detailed the information from inside will become.

So,

You know,

If you're really,

Really focused on it.

You,

You can also get a sense of what the issue is,

Is that's clearing.

And,

You know,

What happened early that caused you upset.

The,

The other thing is to make it simple for people I through meditation,

I,

I came up with this.

Well,

It,

I didn't come up with it,

It came through me.

Okay,

It already existed.

But this body approach where you just look at your location of the pain.

You,

You see it as a metaphor for the psychological reason for it.

So,

You know,

If something's in your heart area.

It's going to be related to to love and receiving love.

If something's new shoulder is it's going to be related to taking responsibility,

You know,

Our next,

Like how freely can we turn our neck,

You know right to left how broad is our perspective,

Maybe in childhood,

Maybe we grew up with two very narrow parents maybe.

And so maybe,

You know,

I mean really our,

Our neck might not be able to turn,

Really,

You know I was working with a woman who was 86,

And she made an emotional shift.

And suddenly,

Her neck released.

And move my neck,

But she would happen to us,

Her mind open and her perspective broadened.

I mean,

It's so simple this work that I think that's part of why it gets overlooked.

And was it through meditation.

Pardon?

Was it through meditation?

That she made this shift.

In this case,

No.

What happened was,

I was very focused on helping her accept herself.

Right.

And she suddenly shifted into more self acceptance and feeling loved she felt safe and loved by me.

So she shifted into more self acceptance.

And so then her perspective,

You know,

Increased,

Broadened,

It became more like the owl,

You know who the wise old owl that can move its neck you know 360 degrees,

You know,

Yeah.

You also mentioned that self realization to embracing oneself is quite a powerful tool in this journey.

Right.

And,

And you mentioned just now about acceptance.

Right.

That also helps in shifting your focus and your mindset.

You know,

If you think that we're all God's children,

And any parent knows how much they love their children,

How much more does God love us.

But we might not feel that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I,

I feel there's lots of reasons why we,

We might not feel this.

You know,

In ancient times,

Children were carried by their mom,

You know,

On,

On the mom's body for an even in simpler cultures,

This still happens for a long time like maybe two years,

As she does her tasks.

And there are other women around,

And the child gets,

You know,

A lot of touch,

And a lot of love very early.

Now,

We don't do this anymore.

But our,

I feel really strongly that our bodies and psyche.

These are really thousands and thousands of years of that pattern.

And so we're ignoring these patterns and,

And,

You know,

In the West,

We will,

You know,

A woman,

30% of the women give birth through caesarean so the mom,

Right at the time that's the most crucial for the baby to feel loved and to bond with the mom.

The,

The mom has this terrible wound,

Which,

If she was on the,

If she were on the battlefield she would just die it's mortal wound.

Yeah.

She,

She,

To bond with the baby over this,

And maybe,

You know,

Go back to work in three months,

And it's it.

It creates what we're doing creates psychologically,

The patterns of alienation,

Of not getting the love that we're primed to get not to feel it we may be really loved as a baby,

But,

Yeah.

We might not feel it so then we go into adulthood,

We don't feel it it's where is it.

And it makes it hard for us to accept ourselves.

So this goes back into childhood,

Feeling like this.

You also mentioned in your book that children who are not loved,

Are left with no idea how to care deeply for themselves and they learn to exploit manipulate and suffer from insecurity.

How does that happen.

Well,

It's,

You know,

The two polarities in the universe are love and fear so where love is not fear will rush in.

So,

You know we we have these children that first thousands of years are primed to be held and carried for maybe even two full years when that doesn't happen,

Then there's an insecurity that comes in,

And with that comes in,

Like,

If there's insecurity and fear,

Then the child pulls back,

Goes up into their heads and tries to figure out how to get what they need or want.

And there's,

There's manipulation it's sort of like stepping back,

Trying to figure out how to work with the circumstances to get your needs met.

Right.

Right.

You know,

This is,

This is how insidious it is.

I remember a channel saying to me,

You know,

You have asked the same question for over three years.

And my question,

And it said,

The questions.

The question is,

And you've asked it in many ways.

What behaviors of yours will give your son's the feeling of being loved and and what behaviors of mind will help turn them into,

You know,

Find human beings.

And the channels point was,

What would the thing that my sons needed most to become fine human beings was for me to become a fine human being for me to express this inner nobility that we all have.

But I wasn't doing that I was stepping back and trying to figure out how to manipulate this circumstance.

Do you see that in so many of our parenting books,

No North America it's all how to manipulate your children,

Because children imitate their parents.

So the parents have to be the perfect role models,

So that they can expect the same behavior from their children.

But the parent could learn how to love and forgive themselves to accept their humanity,

And then their children would be able to accept their own flaws and humanity.

You know,

It's good to be vigilant and try to become,

You know,

As perfect as possible but if you're doing that too much.

Yeah,

You,

You will really hurt yourself,

And you will,

You will become.

You'll end up becoming the flawed person that you were scared you were going to become.

So this is quite similar to what we hear in today's modern world about,

You know,

Attachment theory that it all goes back into your childhood how you were raised,

What your relationship with your parents or your caregivers was like,

And that is going to form and shape your personality and adulthood.

Okay.

I also wanted to ask you to kind of elaborate on the point that you mentioned,

Again in your one of your books that mental breakdown or mental breakthroughs.

This is like a spiritual event in one's life,

And whether this is understood by someone or not,

It has a deep impact on your state of mind and your subconsciousness.

I just want to go back to what you were saying about what I was saying about the attachment theory.

Yes and no.

It's like,

If you have a parent who is really lodged in truth.

Yeah.

It doesn't matter what that parent really does,

You will be a really healthy and unusual child.

Do you see what I mean.

It's the degree that the parent is lodged in truth,

And is honest and lets the love flow that matters the most.

Right.

Okay.

I just wanted to ask you about this mental illness.

In India,

I've heard that when there's mental distress,

It's considered a spiritual acceleration.

And it's considered temporary.

Okay.

Whereas,

You know,

In the West,

We have a tendency to to freeze a person in that period so you know if you if you're going through a psychological difficulty,

You might get a diagnosis and pills,

Which is good.

But not if it just freezes you there.

So that you stay forever sort of caught in between the two worlds of who you were conditioned to become.

And then the other side of the mental illness is being who you were born to be.

And that's what happened to me I was raised in a very,

Very rigid,

You know,

Very upwardly mobile success oriented family,

And in my 30s,

I had a bad nervous breakdown,

And to heal from it.

I had to let go of the premise Suta,

I had been and become this person that I am.

And this,

I would say was more the person I was born to be.

Now,

One of the things that once a nervous breakdown has happened it,

You know,

It is a bit violent,

I see it as that.

We so don't know how to speak with the divine or flow with the divine that the divine has to take a hammer,

Kind of,

And,

You know,

Bash in the door to open us to see.

So there's a violence to this.

So one of the things that I noticed was after the nervous breakdown.

And as I grew and developed.

If I got caught in my ego again what would happen is these nervous breakdown symptoms would return.

I would have scar tissue.

Yeah,

Return.

Now,

This was upsetting,

But at the same time.

It was very useful because as soon as the symptoms returned.

I realized,

I was caught in my ego,

And I would increase my efforts to connect to truth and open up to listen to what the divine was trying to explain to me.

This is make sense.

And I think nobody talks about this.

I have never heard it from anywhere other from this for me.

I guess this is more like a wake up call,

Especially when,

For example,

You're making the same mistakes in life and you're repeating the same patterns,

And you're not really getting anywhere.

And sometimes you learn the most important lessons in life,

The hardest way.

So,

I think it's quite similar to what you're saying about having a mental breakthrough mental breakdown and how it impacts your level of spirituality,

Spiritual health.

Yeah,

I mean,

If you can,

You know if a person can find a teacher to help them open in a gentle way.

It's,

It's,

It's much faster that way then you know going through the trauma when I look at my life,

It,

You know,

It slowed me down.

It was like so much scar tissue I had to deal with.

And,

Yeah.

Yeah.

There are two ways of evolution you know there's the,

The male way which is,

You know,

The males are,

They have to be because they,

They were in the old days they would provide for the family.

So,

There's more of a conditional structure for the male,

The male has to get up say in Canada in,

You know,

During the,

The early settling,

They would have to get up and go hunting for food.

Okay,

So,

But the feminine way it's it's more this unconditional love just loving loving a child into behaving better,

It's,

I,

You know,

It's in the male way it's like cutting out the disease,

And the female ways to love out the disease.

So,

I sort of lost my train of thought,

I started talking about this.

Just about,

You know,

Different ways of evolving.

I think we're too rough with ourselves sometimes we slow ourselves down,

Because we're,

We're not forgiving enough of ourselves and patient.

So self compassion is absolutely necessary for healing and for growth.

You know,

If we can think of God as like our,

Our loving,

You know,

More loving than a parent so you know if if we catch ourselves,

Making the same mistake again.

We can go to God and say,

Oh,

You know God here I have I've done it again you know what I'm like you know how hard this is for me,

Please help me,

You know,

Rather than like hitting ourselves over the head for like two weeks,

Feeling out of ourselves right.

Yeah.

Um,

My next question to you is how can we reach that status of consciousness,

Where we are kind of aware of what's happening deep down.

How can we manage,

You know the interest I could conflict that we have within our minds and resolve that before it takes the form of a mental illness or a psychological difficulty in later life.

How can you prevent it from happening.

Well,

I'd say as soon as you start trying to prevent it,

You're actually going to set it in motion.

Okay.

You know,

It's like that thing don't think about a white elephant right so immediately you end up thinking about a white elephant right.

I think it's,

It's if we realize that it's more that you just want to embody your true nature more than anything else that you just look around and you go,

You know,

The human race is just going to have more and more trouble if we keep doing what we're doing.

So please,

You know,

Universe creator.

Show me how to embody my truth and really mean it.

That's the key,

Like when I look back at my journey.

Yeah,

I was so ignorant.

But when I said,

I want to move into truth.

I really meant it.

I really meant it.

And if your will is behind it.

The universe,

Or the creator will respond with the same kind of care and devotion that you're giving the creator to understand.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And,

You know,

In my experience,

You know,

The,

The,

The male aspect of humanity the male polarity is.

So,

You know,

It's respected.

And sometimes the qualities of the feminine polarity are considered weak.

And so,

For women,

It can make it really hard for us to love ourselves,

Or is this sometimes women are really laboring under this,

That,

You know,

That they're not okay.

And the thing is,

We need clear,

Loving feminine energy more than anything in both men and women.

My great hope is that the women of the world that they just realize how valuable they are.

And how much we need the softness and the cooperation and the nurturing and the patience and the compassion of the female polarity in,

You know,

In humanity,

And you males all have a feminine side to you said that waking up is something which is quite hard to do.

For most of us,

I think,

To remain in our comfort zone is quite easy.

Instead of coming out of the comfort zone,

Bringing change within ourselves,

And then changing and shifting everything around us.

It's a lot of work.

It can be a painful process as well.

Very painful.

Yeah,

Very painful.

How can you make it easy?

How can you make it a possibility?

I think you need one another hour just to explain that right.

You know,

There's,

It's funny I just posted a video,

And it was about,

You know,

How to,

How to heal our anger,

And that if our anger is unconscious we walk around feeling separate from everything,

And including ourselves Mother Nature and others.

And if we,

If we allow this anger to to heal.

We start connecting up with ourselves and all of nature and everybody,

But to heal the anger,

We have to be able to experience the deep grief of feeling separate.

You know,

But the simplest way to to heal anger really is to cry for God to yearn so much to embody our true nature that tears fall in this school.

This will help us to heal our inner anger.

But,

You know,

In my experience,

The journey.

It's bigger than we realize it's sort of like if I know what my journey was going to take me.

I mean,

I don't know if I would have followed through but I'm very grateful that I followed through but it was far more challenging than I had expected but the,

But the thing is the results are good.

You know,

We get we get what we give if you,

If you have this fortitude.

And,

You know,

And the steadiness to keep at it.

The great gifts of your life will just open up in into ways that there are no words for how what it feels like to really feel that God exists,

And when you pray that God is responding.

Yeah,

It's just.

And so it's worth it.

We're divine beings we think we're human,

But we're,

We're divine so the more we remember that and make that our center of gravity and seek to embody the qualities of our divinity seek to allow them in I'm not,

I'm not talking about trying to be good,

I'm talking about really allowing our true nature to shine through the more,

The more good we do here.

But life,

What can I say,

It takes everything you've got and then some.

You spent a really long time in getting to where you are now.

How many years have you spent in learning in in acquiring,

You know,

Knowledge from from teachers and masters you've traveled so much spent a lot of time in many countries,

And your own personal journey your,

Your personal experiences that led to.

You know,

In my 20s,

When I was,

I was really unhappy and I didn't know why and in the east,

They would say that was really good because they'd say that such a person gets onto their spiritual journey sooner than later if they're deeply unhappy,

But I remember going to channels and they said to me,

They would say to me,

The amount of emotional garbage,

I had to deal with,

They had never seen such a big pile.

This is when you were working as a journalist.

Yes,

This is when and I,

And I felt great on happiness,

And I just didn't know why.

And so,

You know,

When I began the journey and started studying with teachers.

The truth of this comment that I had an unusual amount of resistance was very obvious.

So it's taken me 30 years I mean,

I say,

That is a long time,

Maybe even 34 years.

Yeah.

And it was through your own experience,

Premise of that because you went through something,

And that could have been like a wake up call for you.

And the journey that you took from that moment onwards,

Transformed you completely.

And you're definitely not the same person as you were.

So 35 years ago.

40 years ago.

What happened.

I was diagnosed with leukemia,

And they,

They said there was no chance of a healing.

Right.

No chance that there was no therapy they could even do because it was a bizarre kind of leukemia.

And this is years and years ago nearly 40 years ago so you know who knows they probably could do something now but I remember coming back from the appointment,

And I put my son down on the carpet.

And this,

The sun came in behind him.

And I had this moment of,

It was like heaven and earth meeting.

Wow.

And it was that if I knew that if I believe the doctors,

If I mean I did believe them in a way but if I,

If I,

If I gave up on my son's life.

Yeah,

That he would feel it in my breast milk.

So,

I,

And die.

And so I opened the door,

And it was an experiential moment it was almost outside time and space,

I opened the door for something else to happen.

And what happened is within two weeks of that decision.

Somebody put me in touch with Olga Worrell,

Who said love every day from a distance for about three years.

And my son healed completely his blood count was 60,

000.

He was so pale you could almost see through his skin,

And he was dying.

And he had a complete healing,

And he's now a grown man and he's got a very deep quality.

So,

Okay now,

After that that was pivotal,

Because I had a direct experience of my prayer being answered,

And of God's love coming through my difficulty was,

Actually,

Learning to love myself.

That's why I had such a difficult time you see just like what you're talking about in between,

Because on one hand that was just,

I mean,

A sterling example of God existing,

But it was for me to really feel that I deserve love,

And that God was there for me to not for my son,

And that took me two or three years of just the most intense psychological pain.

But I did it.

Because I'll tell you,

God wins.

You know that's the thing in the fight between the ego and God,

God wins.

Of course.

Yeah.

So how can we make our ego lose.

In this war.

Yeah.

Okay,

So I'd say that question you know you're standing,

You're sort of standing away from yourself and you're going,

Like,

Okay,

What actions should I take,

Or how do I,

You know,

Manipulate my ego into dying.

It's like,

Yeah,

It's,

You know,

That will add to,

You know,

A lot of the West is doing this,

And actually,

That will make things worse.

That will actually make your ego get bigger,

Because whatever you fight will get bigger.

Really?

Yeah.

It's like the story of the white knight who goes and he spends he wants to rid the,

The,

The country of all the evil black knights.

So he sets off and 20 years later,

He looks in a lake,

And he sees this reflection,

And he's become a black knight,

Because he focused on the black and fought it.

It's like,

If you,

If you want grace and light you focus on grace and light it's whatever you put your attention to,

You will get more of.

So,

You know,

Risa let me just think for a minute.

You're very lovable.

I just,

You're very lovable.

I mean,

Just,

Just accept it.

You're very lovable and very adorable and you have this heart of gold.

It's like,

You know,

Now the world knows it.

So,

Maybe you can,

You can,

You know,

Give yourself the benefit of the doubt,

Side with yourself.

Like,

You're beautiful just the way you are.

You're about as perfect as a human being can be with,

You know,

Just,

You know,

Aware of your human flaws and and wanting to,

To serve humanity and wanting to embody more of your true nature.

And that will get you where you need to go,

It'll be like an IV,

Think of an IV coming in to your,

The more you focus on love and grace,

The more loving grace is coming into you and softening you with yourself to yourself.

You see,

Most of us don't realize,

You know,

We're adults,

We try to figure ourselves out,

We don't realize that our,

That we're actually walking around in our injured child energy that our wanting to fix our ego is coming from our injured child,

It is actually coming from the ego.

The soul would never,

Would never come through that way.

It's your soul knows why your ego is there and,

And out of the sorrow that it formed,

And the,

And the,

Your soul has just enormous compassion for,

For your struggles with the ego or for any of our struggles with the ego.

So think that way.

Your,

Your divine nature is already in yourself.

How can people come to that realization.

You have to really want to.

You have to really want it.

More than anything else.

You know,

Is it necessary to find a purpose in life for that.

Because you find it you're by the byproduct of finding it will be you,

You find more of a purpose,

Because you're your true nature has maybe goals for you.

This life like this is I'm doing what my true nature wanted me to do my ego self was like an erotic journalist,

You know.

But we're so I mean,

Okay,

How about this,

Would you be willing to make a shift into more truth,

Just through doing the zoom.

Yes,

You know,

When you say shift term as in mindset or outlook or believe,

Would you be willing for your,

For your God self to be more strengthened in the cells of your body.

Then before you began the zoom.

Definitely.

Okay,

So it is.

That's it.

That's how simple it is.

After you,

You know,

After we close and everything.

You know,

I would say you know 99.

9% that you will see the result of you having made this said yes,

In the zoo,

And that your sense of trust will have been strengthened.

It's like that.

So,

You know,

You can imagine.

Imagine angels hugging you just,

You know,

Whatever keeps your mind connected to your divine nature and not thinking,

You know,

Just the thoughts about how loud our neighbor is or,

You know,

A hard time at work or traffic or.

Okay.

So,

What,

One of the things that happened to me on the journey was out of the deep depression and difficulty.

And this knowledge surfaced from inside my body I don't know how to explain it apart from that it wasn't like an intellectual thing.

It surfaced from the cells of my body,

And also from,

I noticed from my observation of my aches and pains,

And then connecting them to what I was going through.

So I,

I came to this understanding that the body is like a physical metaphor for our souls,

And that the parts of our bodies that there,

We have difficulty in there's meaning.

It's actually pointing to our issue,

Our psychological issue.

So,

If you,

If you don't know what your issues are,

You can just look at your body and and feel your aches and pains and or feel where the illnesses,

And that will tell you what issues you're,

You're working on.

So,

For example,

You know,

In the West,

Okay knees,

So knees are relationship and you know,

And,

You know,

I used to,

You know,

Kneel to pray,

And the suitor would would get down on his knees to ask his fiance to marry him.

It's the knees have to do with relationship.

And so,

Relationship with ourselves,

And with others.

So,

And with our bodies so in the West,

You know,

There's a lot of trouble with nice knee pain and especially trying to.

Yeah.

And also you know runners need from all the,

You know,

The young people who used,

You know,

My generation they're not young anymore but they would run on cement,

You know,

Endlessly and,

You know,

A big badge of honor is to be fit,

And people would run and maybe they didn't listen to their bodies and and ran no matter how they were feeling,

And they would,

They would then get trouble with their knees finally,

Because they weren't listening.

Now,

I know this is hard on one hand for our,

Our minds to get around that the meanings of our illnesses and aches and pains are directly related to the complexes we're working on but to me it's just become really obvious in my own experience you know I actually had breast cancer,

A couple of years ago.

And I,

You know,

I knew it was related to some misunderstandings I had around the feminine,

It was my left breath so it was on the left side of my body.

The left side is in the shamanic viewpoint is the feminine side of the body,

It was right in the milk duct right in the milk of human kindness.

And I really knew from my inner experience of myself,

That little bit of bitterness within me around loving,

You know kind of bitterness,

Oh,

Feeling like,

You know,

Oh,

It never comes back to me the way I wish it to or that kind of thing.

And also,

One of the things that came up for me as I went through this was,

I,

My mom nursing for my mom,

She was very very unhappy when I was little.

So,

You know,

Really all of her unhappiness.

I took on,

Along with the breast milk,

And it's not to blame her because it's like any human being would have been unhappy and her circumstances.

But I realized where it left me psychologically carrying kind of a wounding on my feminine now,

As I journaled about this,

And I spoke to God a lot because I think when we're ill.

It's between us and God,

You know,

It's,

It's something where we're out of alignment or we're learning.

And it's not to blame the victim at all on this,

I just,

I just mean it like in a scientific way that it's,

You know,

It's showing us that something's wrong with us,

Or unbalanced.

So as I kept working on it,

I got more and more information and the funny thing is that my operation was delayed as a result of COVID.

Oh yeah,

I had the operation.

The cancer was 50% smaller and had shrunk out of my nodes so it was no longer in my immune system.

So I didn't have to have chemotherapy or radiotherapy.

So,

You know,

I was inspired to think that maybe I could reach a kind of healing,

As a result of having my son's miracle healing.

And it was for me to learn to allow myself to have a healing so you know I still had the surgery,

But it was very reassuring for me to,

To see the empirical evidence of that I was on track.

And I say,

Since this happened,

My comfort with my own feminine nature and my acceptance of my feminine nature and the love power coming through is,

Is double tripled quadrupled,

Like it,

It,

It freed me emotionally enormously.

And I was very grateful to the illness,

And I had a really lovely surgeon and he helped before.

Before I went in for the operation he stood back and he gave me this look of utter compassion which I don't think many people might get from their surgeons and that assisted me to,

You know,

So I was very lucky,

But you know that's an example of really what I'm talking about the body will bring up trouble.

And if we think that whatever pain or difficulty is,

Is in the process of healing,

Not to think,

Oh,

Something's wrong,

Like my knees hurt,

But to think,

Oh,

The complex is healing,

And the symptoms are just coming up.

And at that time in my 30s,

I was about yeah 30s early 40s.

I woke up one morning and every joint in my body hurt.

So,

It was really hard to move,

And it was hard to move for three months.

And I didn't go to the doctor because I felt that I didn't think it could be arthritis because it was every single joint.

But,

You know,

I actually recommend going to doctors because,

You know,

I ran into trouble with my breath so,

You know,

But what happened was after it took three months,

But all the pain left,

And my body was suddenly about 35% more flexible.

And,

You know,

I suspect that,

You know,

In the joints,

The pain and stiffness that came was,

I was experiencing a physical form of what was going on with me emotionally that there was a rigidity to me,

And a kind of stiffness and a chi of my life energy,

And it cleared through this experience so it was terrible to go through,

But it turned into a blessing.

So this is how this transcendent body approach developed and,

You know,

Arms are are reaching out and embracing and hands are giving and receiving,

You know,

Neck again perspective we talked about that how how broad a perspective,

We have a chest love elbows are changed.

When I,

My husband left me with this is part of where my training team from I had a child still with leukemia and newborn baby and my husband please me.

And it's where I really had to turn to God,

You know,

It's part of the really good thing but my elbows hurt for three,

Three months and I remember looking at Louise Hayes who had it listed in her book,

And it's change elbows are changed and my life was certainly changing.

Shoulders responsibility hips,

Personal power,

Tummies,

Our stomach,

It's,

It's how,

How much can we stomach and digest and body our own divinity sometimes when people are making a shift into strengthening their soul,

They will feel nauseous and or get acid reflux or even throw up.

And that's happened to me before but it's it's part of the changes that occur in the body to as our vibration goes up their physiological changes.

And one of the things that happened with women who work with me is if they start off with difficulties at the at their time of the month pains and everything that will go,

They will suddenly have very little trouble and it's because I'm helping them embrace their female nature more.

So they have no resistance to their feminine effort more on this resistance,

What does it really mean,

Because it seems like you're saying that emotional resistance can lead to physical resistance resistance in your within your body.

Yeah,

Emotional resistance like where we're trying to swim upstream.

We're not going with the flow where we're not flowing with our true nature and with the God inside us,

We're resisting it for whatever reason,

You know,

We think it's not allowed or then that creates tension in the body,

And it will also create illness finally,

Because the,

You know,

The creators going like,

Well,

You're resisting me like so you're gonna have to have an experience of,

Of how you're resisting me and I'll show it to you.

So you can allow it to heal.

It's all very loving.

It's all to help us.

It just feels like we feel like,

Oh,

You know,

I felt sorry for myself with the breast cancer.

It's like,

Why me.

I pray so hard.

I pray so hard.

Why do you think bad things happen to good people.

I think we're learning results in human form so we come here to learn and we forget that,

You know,

We kind of like we're like kids it's like,

I want,

I want chocolate for dinner.

And it's like the parents can go no you cannot talk about it so like,

You know,

We come here to learn and that's our.

That's why we're here it's sure we can have a good time here but that's not,

You know,

We can enjoy it here but point of it is for our awareness to grow and our faith in God to grow.

Yeah.

And life gets very gentle with us.

As we allow that.

Right.

You've written a lot about the transcendent way body approach.

What is all that about.

Oh,

Just what I was saying about the body.

No,

Just what I was explaining.

Yeah.

So,

So we need to pay attention to our aches and pains like the bodily ailments in order to understand the deep rooted meaning that it holds.

Yeah,

That's it because if supposing I have a problem with my hands I could think,

Oh,

Okay,

I don't know what it is but there's something I'm giving and receiving.

So I can give it over to God and then asked to be shown.

And then,

You know,

In a month I might have a memory where I,

You know,

Something happened to me as a child and I,

And I moved into distrust of life or I felt that if I,

If I gave that I would be exploited.

So I stopped giving this sort of thing.

Right.

Yeah.

So you've spoken about the feminine self and the masculine self that it exists,

Side by side,

Within every single human beings body.

So,

A man will also have the feminine side and a woman will also have the masculine side.

Yes.

So,

I think that's a really important part of that.

When does it become an obstacle in our journey?

When does it become a problem?

Is it the imbalance between the two or?

Yeah.

It's perfectly functioning like in a really awakened human being totally realized there,

You know,

They're masculine and feminine are madly in love with each other it's like mother and father and God are madly in love with each other it's like,

It's,

You know,

It's a two polarities of humanity and we need both.

So,

You know,

When we're.

If we're too lopsided either to the feminine or to the masculine.

Yeah,

Then we,

We become unhappy.

It's,

You know,

It.

If,

If there's too much feminine.

Things can get hard,

Like a move towards brutality without the softening of the feminine,

And also with the masculine things can become very hierarchical without more the cooperation of the feminine.

So,

You know,

It's to keep both polarities balanced,

So,

So that the full spectrum of of our humanity can express ourselves.

And how do we create that balance.

How do we create this,

You know,

I feel women have to love themselves.

And that comes through self care self compassion forgiveness.

All of that right and to side with their true female natures like I was on a plane coming back from Germany where I share this work,

And when the plane this little child cried,

And people were getting more and more upset.

And so I,

I walked over to the mom,

Finally and and said,

Maybe can I hold the baby for a while and give you a rest.

But it was,

You know,

COVID were marrying mask and she didn't feel safe enough,

But luckily,

I touched the baby's hand.

And he stopped crying,

And he didn't cry again.

Yeah,

It was so I so happy.

But the thing was,

Afterwards somebody came up to me and told me that I'd restored her faith in the human race.

And that's fine like I just went over and offered a mom,

A little bit of help,

You know,

Like it wasn't it didn't deserve a medal.

It was a very human thing to do around me when I was there,

Speaking to the mom,

I could feel a great kind of turmoil around the people nearby with how you know,

And see they were getting irritated.

And I was so grateful they were that somebody had come over.

But the thing is that,

You know,

It could have maybe someone could have gotten up and just as they pass the mom smiled at her,

Or made a gentle comment about how hard parenthood be or or bring them to the knees and jiggle them in front of the child.

It's like it,

It alarmed me that there seemed to be this big kind of wall against just sharing our humanity and helping one another out in this just gentle easy way to see so that's where I think it's causing the feminine a bit.

It's,

It's,

It's because any woman especially a woman who's had children knows what that would feel like to have a baby that's just screaming in a plane.

You know,

Be this and to Mother Nature,

And our YouTube channel that's my,

That's the thing I'm most excited about right now it's called wisdom and the in our human lives.

You know I I do sessions all around the world with people who want a session.

Please contact our TV Facebook or YouTube page.

You can also call in the studio and leave your contact details or email us,

And we will get back to you.

We'll see you again next Saturday with another guest,

And another topic related to spirituality psychological well being and mental health.

Till then,

Look after yourselves and be kind to yourself and one another.

Reviews

I was astounded by the low rating of one of your talks since I always get something from them. This was no let down by any means. The quality has to be the reason. Only, people don’t realize what these stars do to someone’s response when it comes down to whether someone will have a listen anyway. I follow God’s will these days so I had a listen anyway. I encourage everyone to listen to what they can hear. It’s all meant to be! Loved this talk and many points you made! I need to listen to it again and jot down notes. Lol
A cardinal is speaking to me near my meditation space outside at precisely 7:44. Divine mother is so divine! Lots of love and hugs. ❤️🌸🤙🏾🌸🙏🏾