Realize that we're a little blinkered,
Not in a self-judging way,
But in a humble way.
Because you guys,
You are all divine beings.
You are all actually self-realized.
You are God incarnate.
Just as we see that Alma is God incarnate,
And she is obviously at a different level.
In my experience,
I mean,
My way of thinking of it,
She's like a thousand people,
A thousand spiritual masters with the level of her love power.
It's just she's cut from a different cloth than the rest of us.
Maybe we're cotton,
She's silk,
But it's like we're all gods just as you are.
It's just that you're wearing these glasses that are darker than the truth.
So,
You know,
Any person who's really awake has taken off these glasses,
And they see really clearly.
And then they basically speak to all of us and basically encouraging us to realize that what we're seeing isn't true,
And we can take off these glasses.
Right.
Okay.
Good.
You got that.
You can.
And the thing about satsangs is they help make it safe to take off the glasses.
Okay.
Now,
Again,
You know,
This is a subtle satsang,
But it will help everybody.
There's some of you guys who are,
You know,
On the journey wanting to really awaken,
And you're doing it from the victim position.
So,
You're going,
You know,
I'm a victim of my childhood.
I'm a victim of what's happened to me,
And I want to evolve.
And kind of,
Oh,
I can't really.
It's too hard.
Or,
You know,
Everybody in my family line picks on me,
And I can't get through to them.
Okay,
You guys.
Yeah.
So,
This is ego.
Just knowing it's ego.
So,
When I was in extremis,
Part of what brought me into extremis was kind of an underlying feeling of being a victim,
You see.
And the way I got out of it was I realized,
Okay,
It's really important.
Nobody else can save us.
Not even Amma.
Nobody else can save us.
It's like our decision inside ourselves to save ourselves that works.
This is really,
Really important.
You have to save yourself.
It's like you have to deeply be willing to learn,
To want to learn.
No teacher can save us.
They can point.
You know,
Even if Amma's giving a hug,
It's like,
Sure,
She can seed,
She will seed into the future.
You know,
If the person's presenting,
Well,
I can't even speak for Amma,
So I shouldn't even say this,
But I just say that I imagine,
I could imagine that maybe when Amma hugs,
She's seeding in the future if somebody's got blocks that they don't want to allow to heal.
You see?
I mean,
What does,
What can a teacher really do?
We're the gods.
So,
You see,
Our choices are key.
Like,
If you're a god,
How can anything other than your choice operate in your life?
Do you understand this?
It's the only thing that's going to have any power is your choice.
We can make a choice,
And then,
Like,
We choose to evolve,
And then we may get our,
All our vasanas coming up,
All our ego,
And we get invited to feel like a victim again.
It's just a clearing.
So,
If we keep to that choice,
I'm going to evolve no matter what,
But it's just a clearing.
So,
If we keep to that choice,
I'm going to evolve no matter what,
Or Amma says,
I'm going to be happy no matter what,
We can be happy if we realize that we're allowing the healing,
That we're allowing our evolution.
So,
Even if we're walking through the mud,
We go,
Like,
I'm doing it.
I'm doing my homework.
I'm becoming more.
I'm helping here in the world.
So,
I'll tell you guys,
And this is very close to my heart and to the bone,
Is in a patriarchy,
Women will need to go into,
I'm a victim,
Okay?
You really need to see this in you.
It's from thousands of years.
Women have functionally been victims.
It really undermines your journeys.
You're not a victim at all.
I'll tell you,
Amma says,
When the women get going,
Nothing is going to stop them.
When a woman really gets going in a true way,
Nothing stops her.
And this is my experience,
That when you tap into the true divine feminine,
Nothing will stop you permanently.
It can't.
Right.
Right.
It's really important we women get this,
Because if you don't get it,
You're going to circulate in despair.
And I really don't want that for you.
And some of you are coming at the journey from your heads.
It's this head and the victim,
And you're finding that you're just going into more and more pain,
And you will if you do this.
The truth of things,
It's,
You basically have to drop down into much deeper level.
You have to drop down into your true nature and realize nobody else can save you,
And you've got your homework to do,
And you might as well turn and face it.
And at the same time,
Realize,
You guys,
I mean,
This,
Again,
Is the joke.
It is done by something beyond you,
And it's already happened.
And so,
You're basically just a witness.
And even if you're getting really confused by what I'm saying,
That's good.
Just focus on your heart area.
Bring part of your attention to your heart area,
And allow the confusion.
Yeah,
Get used to that,
Bringing your attention to your heart area and allowing the confusion,
Because you will be confused.
The fact,
If you don't get confused sometimes,
You're really deluded.
You're really off.
Your journey's a fake.
It's the confusion,
And then we turn up our intention.
We pray harder.
We think of Alma more.
We get on it more,
And we come into clarity.
It's like climbing a mountain,
And it's a difficult spot,
A sheer cliff face,
And you have to really concentrate,
Or you're going to fall,
But you concentrate,
And you get up to a higher level,
A higher level of clarity.
Now,
The cure for being a victim is just being with your experience,
Letting go,
Being with your experience,
Noticing it all,
And praying,
Stopping trying to control anything,
Just being in it,
And praying,
Asking for clarity,
Asking for grace,
And the grace will come.
Yeah,
I promise you the grace will come,
And hopefully,
Some of you have already felt the grace coming,
And that's why you turn up for the sad sex,
Because it will.
The grace will come.
It can't help it,
Because you're God.
You're made out of love.
You're made out of love.
And so,
Your true nature is grace.
Your true nature is love.
That's all that you've gotten out of touch with,
And I'm just trying to remind you.
Okay,
Again,
This is,
You know,
A challenging satsang,
But I kind of want to throw out the gauntlet for a higher level of recognition of truth,
To be more interested in recognizing the truth,
Because that is the journey.
It's not like being a good devotee.
Like,
Truly,
A good devotee is somebody who's really interested in truth,
And I'll tell you guys,
I don't find it.
That's not very common,
I have to say.
Bless your heart.
It's not the most common thing that somebody is really motivated about for the truth.
Yeah.
I mean,
We're so funny.
We want to be good devotees and good Amma's children,
And yeah,
And to do that is,
We have to be willing to just see the truth,
And sometimes we just have to see how heady we are,
And go around with,
Oh,
This is revolting how heady I am.
You're just in it for a bit.
You just keep praying,
Asking for grace,
And you get brought out of it.
This is,
I want you to have the experience.
I'm hoping you will have the experience of being brought out of things,
Being brought out of trouble,
Brought out of despair,
Brought out of great unhappiness.
Yeah,
You're gods.
Your true nature is peace.
When I talk about being brought out of unhappiness and everything,
It's just,
What I'm asking is you to recognize your true nature of peace,
Like Michael did yesterday in the question and answer.
Michael,
You shipped it more into your heart,
More into acceptance,
And more interested in your true nature.
That's it,
Rather than wanting other people to validate us.
Sure,
That's nice if they do,
But you guys,
We get validated by other people the more we shift into truth,
But our true friends will validate us.
It's like,
Look at,
I mean,
It's even,
It's so stupid,
But the whole thing about my hair.
Like,
I'll tell you,
I got like 20 comments.
I mean,
People even stopped me in the gas station and commented on my hair and would start telling me their life story.
Like,
It was,
This is in a way validation in like a crazy human way,
Because it didn't happen before the same way.
So,
Play with it,
You guys.
Just play a little bit with it.
All things like humorous.
Okay,
The other thing I really want to talk about is,
Can you dispassionately look at how you use your minds?
In order to do that,
You will have to move into self-acceptance and self-understanding.
And that's the hardest thing,
You guys,
For,
To really embrace your humanness,
Your you-ness,
And embrace it and come from that.
Because most of you are stuck in being bad or good spiritual students,
Really.
So,
You're kind of like,
You're kind of stuck in that mechanistic,
Energetic box,
Rather than rising up in your true humanity as,
I am God in human form.
I am a divine being.
I have value.
It really matters how I am with myself.
Do you know,
I've talked a lot about the,
How difficult this life journey's been,
And that I didn't have any karma to other people,
But I had a great deal of self-karma to deal with.
Do you guys understand that understand that it is karmic to be brutal with yourselves?
Please understand this,
Because you are God in human form.
It is all the lifetimes where I dissed myself that have made this life so difficult.
Yeah.
Now,
I have great compassion,
Empathy for you,
And for how hard it is to come into self-love sometimes.
But if you can understand dispassionately that you are really hurting yourself with being too hard on yourself,
Then,
You know,
We don't have to put so much weight on Amma to hug us out of this.
We're doing some of the homework ourselves,
You know,
This poor woman,
You know,
Just hugging to,
You know,
The point of exhaustion.
So,
We can help her by stepping up,
And you guys,
I have such compassion for the process.
But I also know you will get stuck with the results of what you do.
Our choices,
That's it.
So,
If this satsang gives you a little bit of a stronger motor behind your desire to love and accept yourself,
Or if it weakens some of the negative beliefs,
Then I'm like in nirvana.
But remember,
Only you can do it.
It's like,
It's sort of like sometimes you might wake up and realize that you just don't have to do it anymore to yourself.
You just have a moment where you realize that you don't have to go into all that negativity.
You could just be softer with yourselves.
Yeah.
Not indulgent.
Okay,
It's really important,
Not indulgent,
Not self-indulgent.
Like,
Yeah.
You'll know the difference.
So,
Talking about the use of the mind,
Years ago I had a student,
Now this is a long time ago,
And she would think of her vasanas as kind of a contamination that contaminated,
That hurt the world and hurt the universe.
And she would think like that,
Okay?
Now,
That,
You know,
And feel like,
You know,
Oh that she was,
It's just that miserable sinner thing.
Miserable sinner hurting the world with this,
Hurting the universe with this.
And you guys,
And she would think this way,
And you see,
She was actually promoting darkness with this thought.
She was actually,
That thought was coming from her shadow side.
It was coming from her ego,
Trying to keep the darkness going.
And if you look at it,
There was a megalomania in there of where she was thinking that her vasanas had so much power when the creators got the power.
The creator has the power.
The love has the power.
Power of darkness is just illusory.
As long as we believe in the power of darkness,
It will be there.
If you have a human,
A creator in human form who believes in the power of darkness,
Then darkness will have power because it is the creator thinking that way.
I hope you all listen to this satsang again because it's,
You know,
There's a lot in it.
So,
As long as she's thinking that,
As long as she was thinking that way,
And she's grown out of it now,
But,
You know,
That her darkness would have so much power.
It would be stronger than the creator.
Okay,
Now,
If she had understood herself psychologically,
She wouldn't have been able to do that.
She wouldn't have been able to let that thought run like that.
See,
To really get to the heights of the journey,
You have to understand yourself psychologically in a very loving way,
And you have to see that you are your injured child.
So,
Many of you guys are looking at yourselves like something to be fixed.
I'll tell you,
You're never going to get anywhere as long as you do that.
Really,
Because it's like,
It is exactly what creates the negative,
You know,
The negative karma,
In a way,
For how you're treating yourself.
Remember,
Even if you don't get this,
You can get this.
You might get this in six months,
And even just listening,
If you listen,
Just listen with an open heart and with a kind of self-forgiving.
It's why I'm so,
I tell you so much about all my screw-ups.
I'm wanting you guys to have the soil to be able to accept your humanity and realize that it's not,
That this is the whole point.
We're here to be human and accept our humanity as a way to God.
We can't get to God without accepting our humanity.
Okay,
I'm feeling movement.
I'm so glad.
Please accept your humanity.
I do.
I do.
Yeah,
Please.
Please accept your humanity,
You know.
As you accept your humanity,
You will get,
I'll tell you what,
You will get a response for,
Even from the outside of you,
Showing that you are on the right track.
See,
This is why I mentioned the hair,
Because I'll tell you,
The universe will give you feedback immediately.
And if you're getting negative feedback,
Just,
You know,
Just know that you're in confusion,
And just do your best to love yourself.
Like,
I can't tell you the number of nights that I spent imagining angels hugging me,
You know,
Just out of total desperation.
And after a few nights of that,
I would make a shift into more truth,
You know.
I would come into more peace,
But I really knew nobody could save me,
Except me.
See,
The reason I want to,
I talked about,
You know,
This woman from years ago about the Vasanas,
Is I want to tell you how tricky the ego gets with the spiritual journey.
Okay,
Sometimes,
You know what,
Sometimes my clients who have never met Amma make huge jumps,
Just because they don't know the religious way.
They don't know,
They don't.
They're just like the country bumpkin of spirituality,
And they get it,
Because they get they're so innocent,
They're like the fool in the fairy tale.
And sometimes the people that,
You know,
Are most focused on the journey are caught in this religiosity.
And the religiosity is the opposite of the accepting the humanity.
So,
This person who was focused on the Vasanas,
It's like her ego was totally running that,
Because the strongest thing about her is the creator.
And it was just the ego not wanting her to know about how beneficent she is.
She was,
Is,
She still is.
That would make her mind do this.
See,
You guys,
I'm wanting you to become psychologically aware enough that you can stop this and not believe it,
Because it's got a Vasana,
You know,
So I'm focused on my Vasana,
So I'm a good spiritual student.
No!
Watch how tricky your mind is about the spiritual journey.
Watch how it can turn into religiosity very quickly.
It's why the spiritual journey has been so fraught with peril over the centuries,
Because people got caught in these ego things and thought they were doing good,
Like the Spanish Inquisition.
I mean,
That's how crazy murdering people was somehow considered holy.
This is how crazy it can get.
And this is why,
Like,
The focus on the humanity,
You guys,
Just don't try to,
Like,
Get to the heights.
Just focus on loving and accepting your humanity and being as beneficent as possible to yourself and all the others around you.
You know,
It was because,
In a way,
I dropped an atomic bomb on my life early that I didn't get caught in the religiosity at all,
Really.
I mean,
I did.
I did,
But not as much as I might have,
Because I was just faced with this human…the human mess of a being,
You know?
And I had to learn to love her.
Yeah,
What happens when we just turn and love ourselves,
Our God-Self manifests.
So,
One of the things,
You know,
We can get so caught in our thoughts and believe our thoughts,
But you guys,
I'll tell you,
Every thought comes from your ego.
Please,
Do you understand this?
Any thought is ego,
And it's coming from patterns from other lives.
Your true nature doesn't talk.
It's…you will just know things.
You experience something.
That's your true nature.
So,
If you can,
With whatever thinking is going on,
If you just realize it's all coming from your ego,
And if you get in there and play,
You're going to get caught in the ego.
Now,
This is really high level,
And I really don't understand why I'm presenting it today,
Particularly,
But it just came,
So this is it.
And I know that it will catalyze.
It can catalyze you,
No matter where you are,
And there's no order of worth.
Wherever you are in the mountain,
It's like you are a divine being.
Wherever you are in the mountain,
Please,
You are of infinite worth.
Look at premisuda,
Okay?
Do you think premisuda would be,
You know,
You could imagine premisuda like being like 20 years ago with a bit of a mess,
But I still would have been premisuda.
The heart light would still be shining through,
Even in confusion and everything.
Do you see what I mean?
It's the same with you guys.
It's wherever you are.
You're of great worth,
Just as you are.
Right,
But you know,
If we all got this,
All this aggression that we're seeing so much of in every direction would just dissolve.
All the aggression we're seeing is just coming from fear and not in the ignorance of our God,
The truth of our God-selves,
Because I mean,
We're gods.
I mean,
That's why it's karmic to kill somebody.
Even,
You know,
Yeah.
Guys,
Just turning up,
It's like it's very brave because,
You know,
This is unsettling,
But there's a tremendous safety net of love behind it,
And you have ama,
And you have your true nature,
Which can shine right through anything.
And,
You know,
Realize that whatever you're going through,
You know,
Even if you feel like you're stuck in ego,
It has to be this way.
It's not a mistake.
It's part of the process.
It's like a woman giving birth goes through incredible pain,
And it's bloody,
And she's shrieking.
And I remember my gynecologist obstetrician said to me something like,
Like I had these really big babies,
Nine,
Seven,
And really big heads,
You know,
They're Taurus boys,
Big solid boys,
And I was having real trouble.
And the obstetrician was going like,
Sort of,
Just calm down,
Janet.
I'm like,
Was I thinking,
Chad,
Just calm down.
I'm like,
I have no idea what this feels like.
So,
This can be on the journey too.
We have these intense times sometimes,
But it's all bringing illumination.
It's all bringing truth.
And,
Wherever you are,
You'll move,
You'll shift by loving and accepting where you are.
Not trying to fix.
Loving and accepting where you are,
And then that will show you how to go forward.
Okay,
So,
For example,
You're on a mountain,
And you're in a really difficult spot.
So,
You go,
Well,
I wish I was in,
You know,
Mountain meadow with sunlight and wildflowers.
So,
You know,
If you stand there and wish you were in this meadow,
Your time's passing,
You're going to get tired.
You're going to be more tired.
It's going to be harder to just face the reality of where you are,
Maybe in a really difficult rocky spot.
But if you put all your intentions to dealing with this rocky spot,
It gets solved.
Same with if we're going through,
You know,
Trouble,
It's like asking for grace.
Just accepting,
You know,
We have to accept so much.
It's,
It is the hardest.
I've found it just the hardest.
And I was thinking about Amma,
You know,
You guys.
So,
Here she's been like 40 years of going out and hugging the world,
And look at what's going on in the world.
I don't know what this is like for Amma.
I think,
You know,
She's God,
So she's equiminious,
But she's also a human female who loves her children,
You know.
So,
I'm sure that it's not easy for her.
And I remember her prayer,
You know,
Just for one night,
May everybody be able to sleep,
And for one night,
May everybody have a full belly,
Or one day,
Everybody have a full belly.
Yeah,
And those prayers haven't come true yet.
So,
It just needs to be accepted.
So,
We just have to accept in our own lives where we are.
Accept,
It's where we have to be.
It's the most loving thing that could happen to us.
Please love yourselves.
You know,
Give yourselves the benefit of the doubt.
And,
You know,
The more you move into truth,
The more equiminious you get.
So,
You know that this is just a dream,
A play.
So,
It doesn't matter so much about whether dreams come true or not,
Because it's really,
You know,
It's just ephemeral,
It's not real.
And,
You know,
We're going to wake up.
And when you read the near-death experiences,
Or hear them,
People cross over and they don't want to come back,
Right?
Because it's so awesome there.
So,
That's what we're going to get.
We're going to get,
Like,
Total experience of just love,
Total peace.
All of us will get that.
And all I'm saying is you can make room for some of that to come in now through self-acceptance.
Yeah,
Through self-acceptance.
It's like,
Understand,
You know,
Lots of us have PhDs in idiocy.
It's okay,
It's a human.
It's like,
It's okay.
Yeah,
It's freeing to allow your humanity,
You guys.
That's why this,
This is why this work works,
Because of the humanity in it.
It helps people make room for their humanity.
And so,
We grow.
Yeah,
We can change,
We evolve,
We actually become more like the Creator,
As we accept our humanity.
Now,
Remember,
It's done for us.
So,
Don't go,
Try to fix,
I'm trying to fix the fact that I don't accept my humanity.
Don't do that.
Just,
Just imagine Amma hugging you,
Imagine Pramasuta hugging you,
Praising you.
Really,
Do stuff,
You guys,
That's what I did.
I imagined stuff like that,
Really,
All the time.
All the time,
I imagined angels hugging me,
I'd imagine Amma praising me.
I just,
I used to feel like it was kind of a way to use my mind in a way,
Because if I didn't do that,
I would eat myself up.
Do you understand?
It was either focusing that way,
You know,
Pretending angels were hugging me,
Amma was praising me,
Or I would be focusing on my vasanas and what a mess I was,
You see?
Just use your mind.
Like,
I used to feel like I was a salesman.
Inside me,
I had a salesman for enlightenment,
Who was always selling me on enlightenment.
You guys,
This was the wild,
The wildness of it,
And why it worked,
You see?
I would do these things for myself.
I knew nobody else could save me,
So I just backstopped myself every step of the way.
And you know,
Lots of times the outside world would not reflect this back,
And I think I feel a bit loony tunes,
But I'm just going to keep going.
And now the universe,
Like,
Look,
So everybody comments on my hair.
Like,
Really,
It was so many people.
And this little kid who got up and danced,
I mean,
It was just so off the wall.
It's humorous.
And we're so,
You know,
Focused on externals,
It would be the hair.
But,
You know,
And I'm almost finished talking,
I'm going to open up,
But the funny thing of it,
Psychologically,
Coming back to this one's childhood,
I always loved the hair in the fairy tales.
And I would dress up with my grandmother and with these woolen braids.
My mom always kept my hair short.
And then I had a high school friend who I really loved her.
We knew each other from other lives.
We really had a close bond.
And she had long blonde hair,
And I used to just love it so much.
I had a lot of focus on hair,
You know?
And so,
This is manifested.
It's such a joke.
And also,
It's a little bit of a flag of saying,
Hey,
Maybe there's something that this woman knows,
You know?
So,
The whole beauty of it,
All the different threads,
The human level,
The childhood imagination level,
All the threads behind the hair.
And you guys,
Next week,
I may have shaved it all off.
So,
You never know.
I might be just bald.
I might.
Yeah.
If it gets too,
Like,
Too stupid,
I'll just shave it all off,
You know?
So,
Really.
Or it might start getting thinner,
You know?
Who knows?
But I'm just taking a snapshot of right now and the weave between the creator and the physical.
Okay.
So,
We're open for questions or comments.
And maybe from somebody who hasn't spoken before.
If we could do that.
Somebody who hasn't spoken or hasn't spoken in a long while.
It's okay.
Okay.
So,
Just anybody,
Then,
Who wants to speak,
Who would like to.
.
.
We'll just open it up to everybody.
Bethan,
Did you want to say something?
Yeah.
Just thank you for saying that.
It's like a nice path.
But an hour or so,
My mind was doing its,
Like,
Dispersing about,
Like,
Different directions with my life and different influences I'm having at the moment and how those are affecting me.
And then I was washing the dishes.
And it's very clearly the words just came out of me.
Like,
Words from you and other people.
I've got to find my own way.
My own way.
And just,
Like,
The release that came from it.
And,
Like,
Tears came to me.
And I literally heard you saying,
Well done,
Sweet one,
Well done.
Good.
That's it.
Uh-huh.
Good.
Good.
Good.
I'm still unsure what that way is,
But I know it's there for me.
No,
But it's,
You know,
It'll just be,
Like,
You'll just,
It'll just figure out.
It won't be boxed.
Remember,
It will be,
You are finding your own way.
Even noticing those,
All those different threads and then coming to a deep shift of unity,
That's the way.
Just don't think that there's,
You know,
A very clearly boxed path to follow.
It isn't like that.
You feel it.
You feel it and you find your way.
It's not an outward path of illumination.
It is the path that's in your heart.
Actually,
It's the path that comes as you love the inner child.
As you love the child that you were,
Your path manifests.
Path,
Your spiritual path is in your child self.
See,
So if you,
This is exactly the religiosity.
If you try to evolve without loving that inner child,
You will never find the path.
Because it's by loving the inner child that you'll find the path to take.
Because I'll tell you,
Premasuddha,
I am like I was when I was three.
Really.
This is,
I was this loving,
Hug everybody,
Hug trees,
Cry for people who were in trouble.
I was just like this.
You just get returned to your,
Who you were around three,
And you live from there.
Right.
And it's glorious.
But it comes from a deep love and acceptance of yourself as you are,
You guys.
And if you can't feel it,
Just imagine having compassion for yourself then.
Imagine Amma hugging you.
Imagine Amma hugging you and giving you this knowledge.
Like to see how you guys,
It's right there in how you use your mind.
You imagine Amma hugging you and putting her forehead to your forehead and transmitting knowledge to you.
That knowledge will come.
If you sit around and go,
Oh,
I'm,
I've got negative vasanas and I'm causing so much damage,
Then that is what you are going to create.
You're God.
If you can imagine Amma hugging you and just,
However it comes.
Remember,
If you just think like,
Think like this,
Just turning up for the satsang,
Okay,
Think like this,
Opens the door to constant love coming to you.
And,
You know,
I always invite Amma to come in behind us.
So maybe we can just imagine that Amma's behind this.
Right.
So the amount of love coming to you is thick and it will do the work for you.
You just,
You know,
You just need to learn to get out of the way a little bit,
But be patient with yourselves,
Please,
You guys.
Please be patient.
If you follow your truth,
You will feel okay,
Even if circumstances aren't the best,
Because you'll feel that you are on track.
Even if it doesn't show or you're not getting good feedback from people.
I really want to say it again,
My love is always with you.
And there is like divine,
There's angelic help that comes as a result of this.
The result of the coming into this work and the satsangs and everything,
It just is there for you.
Yeah.
Okay,
Please,
More comments or questions?
Can I just say one more quick thing about childhood?
And I went for a walk today,
And it's like being Alice in Wonderland,
Because parts of it was just like these huge,
Huge rocks to try and like pebbles.
And then like,
I got lost,
Because I've not walked in this area,
And then end up in bracken and like crawling under bushes and like under these trees and plants and then coming back out and there was big aspects and then having like kind of lost and found,
Like not quite sure I did get out,
Obviously,
Because I'm here now.
But it was quite impressive.
Yeah,
That's what it felt like Alice in Wonderland,
Everything got really big,
And then really small and then big and then small.
And it's just like,
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean,
Physically,
We can,
You know,
Beyond that,
Like,
With your back,
We can just,
In a course of a day,
You might feel suddenly the size of a giant,
And you might suddenly feel really tiny.
You know,
There are all kinds of odd things that could come on the journey.
Just be with them.
It is like Alice in Wonderland sometimes.
That's why we even have Alice in Wonderland as a book,
Because it is like this in lots of ways.
Yeah.
I once physically felt like 300 pounds,
Really.
And it was,
I realized afterwards,
It was early days of my journey,
And I realized afterwards that that was just an experience of the heaviness of my ego,
The heaviness with which I'd been living.
You guys,
You're God.
Okay.
Please,
You're God.
You're the creator as you are.
You're the creator.
You just are wearing dark glasses.
You forget.
Oh,
I love you so much,
Really.
The love of my heart for you is so,
Yeah.
Yeah,
And my understanding of what it's like to be human and how tough it can be.
It's just a dream.
Yeah,
It's just a dream.
But we can dream the dream awake.
We can keep in mind that we're creator.
So,
You know,
This one,
It's like I'm here on earth and everything,
And I'm in the form of premasuddha,
But I'm everything.
You guys,
I am you too.
I'm the sky.
It's all.
There's no separation.
You guys,
The separation goes.
It's not real.
That's our big problem,
You know.
Facing separation is terrible because you feel so separate from everything,
From people,
From a creator,
From mama,
And we're terrified that it's true because the little child felt this,
But it's not.
It's these dark glasses.
It's like you're part of everything.
I'm through the separation,
Really.
And it was so big in me.
It was so big and everywhere.
It just doesn't exist anymore,
And it never did exist,
Really.
It's just illusion.
See,
This is really such a high-level satsang,
And I'm like,
It won't be understandable,
Maybe,
But just hearing it,
You know,
Obviously it's what has to be spoken because it's just coming through.
Yeah.
Any questions,
Comments?
Don't be scared to be foolish,
To look foolish.
How can God ever be foolish,
You know?
Pramasutra?
Yeah,
Jenna?
I just,
I want to express gratitude for,
I read something this morning that said that we're not able to be fully human until our gifts are accepted.
And I was reminded of,
You were talking about a holy human,
Like w-h-o-l-y,
Holy.
Yeah,
Exactly.
And what I feel in this satsang today is that the gift that you're giving us is seeing us so fully and allowing us to be in a safe space to be able to accept our gifts,
Which is all of it.
And so I just,
Yeah,
I just wanted to express gratitude and to speak that into the space that that's what I feel is such a safe space to be able to accept my gifts and see my gifts reflected in everybody in this space.
So thank you.
Yeah,
Sweetie,
You know,
We give what we needed.
You'll find this.
So this is what I needed and didn't really find.
So I give it.
Yeah.
And the other thing is,
The thing about,
You know,
We have to accept our gifts.
Okay.
Yes.
And at the same time,
The gifts come,
The gifts are just your three-year-old self.
You know,
These gifts,
Like this knowledge I had as a three-year-old,
You see?
Right.
So I just want to come back again to your acceptance of your full self,
And that's what gives your gifts.
That's the gift of you.
Right.
Okay.
It's a subtlety,
But you got it.
You got the subtlety.
It's like a,
It's a little even bigger clearing of the separation as you get this.
Like Jenna at three years old knew everything.
And she also knew that she was getting hurt and she was also scared that she would not wake up and be able to heal it.
Okay.
Really,
You guys,
This is what goes on in our little kid self.
Right.
But you're a little kid,
Like you,
You get this groundswell of happiness that starts coming in as you start embracing this little kid energy.
Right.
And that's what you've been feeling this summer.
Yeah.
More room for that.
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
That's it.
That's it.
That's good.
And funny,
I'm feeling there's part of you that has been lodged in complaint about life and that that's really loosening.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well,
This is what we're like.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This work,
It does have this unusual humanity,
But it's,
It's what works you guys.
I mean,
This is,
I think why there's not more spiritual progress around because there's not this understanding of humanity,
But you look at Amma,
She totally models the humanity,
The embrace of humanity.
And that's all I'm following.
I'm just follow her.
That's what she does.
She,
She was wild with it,
Wildly human,
Wildly serving.
Okay.
Again,
I want to tell some of you guys have this coming in from other lives.
It's a misunderstanding around spirituality.
It's,
It's a,
It's an old thing coming from many lives around,
You know,
Where self-flagellation.
Okay.
Now this is,
This is the subtleties of it.
You see,
In the spiritual journey with,
Especially in the past,
There's this been this patterns of self-flagellation instead of an embrace of the humanity that has been considered holier to kind of whip one's own back rather than to just come in to a tremendous love and acceptance of yourself,
Your human self,
And an understanding of why you are as you are.
This is really important that you notice when you get into the self-flagellation and you shift towards coming back into your hearts.
Why I'm telling people these days,
Just focus on your heart area.
You know,
Say your mantra,
Like just doing these things will help bring in this knowledge as a by-product,
Even if it,
You can't see it right away.
But you know,
The focus on the heart,
It brings you back to your human self and your human experience.
And if you're focusing on your heart,
It will be harder for you to deny,
And you will notice more subtleties if you do these things.
Just do your best with it.
It may feel impossible to do,
But if you keep just trying to,
Just keep trying.
Again,
I'm feeling your beauty.
It's just off the charts,
This soft beauty.
And it's divine,
But even the word divine is too kind of cutting for this just,
This soft,
Still beauty within you all.
I'm just feeling it so strongly.
And it's the most powerful thing in you.
It is invincible.
It cannot be destroyed.
It is invincible,
And it wins over time.
You know,
The symbol in the east of the spiritual journey is the tortoise.
It's the amount of patience we can have,
Like this one has been extraordinarily patient.
That's why it's worked.
It was like,
I realized I was in a long game,
You know,
30 or 40 years ago.
I knew it was a long,
Long haul.
And I just developed patience.
It's sort of like,
You know,
A Chinese war strategy.
The Chinese are very patient.
You know,
Really,
In their battles.
They're so patient,
And they never give up,
Really.
So we can be like that spiritually.
And it doesn't matter,
Even if your life feels like a mess,
You know,
In five years,
It'd be completely different.
Things can change overnight.
Just put your arms around yourself as you are.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's it.
Just as you are.
That's it.
You're very beautiful to me,
Just as you are.
Yeah.
Totally.
You know what,
When I'm talking to you,
And I'm working with your misunderstandings,
Your misunderstandings feel like,
For me,
Like somebody's scratching my skin or something.
Do you know what I mean?
It's like this.
Somebody's scratching your skin.
That's why I start working with you to help you over these misunderstandings,
Do you see?
Because I don't want this scratchy feeling.
Do you understand this?
This is so simple.
The scratchy feeling lets me know where you,
If you're in your ego or not,
And then I take action,
And then you make a shift,
And then the scratchy feeling goes,
And I'm happy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But,
You know,
So I respond to the scratchy feeling,
But it's like the hugeness of the love and the comprehension is there for you,
And Amma is like,
Like that woman,
And her love is coming to you all the time.
And remember,
I think of you during the week,
And you'll just appear in my mind,
My heart,
Or I'll get a feeling about you and send love,
You know?
This is what Amma does with us.
Okay,
Well,
My prayer is that you feel loved and reassured,
And that it's easier for you to just accept your humanity.
And you know,
Remember,
You know,
It comes with when you see the PhD in idiocy,
Like how goof you are,
And then you just love yourself.
It's like you just have to because it's such a goof,
You know?
And we fall into the same traps over and over,
And then you crawl out,
You know?
But you're always,
Even if you fall into another trap,
It's at a higher level than last time.
Yeah.
You're always making progress.
Okay,
My beloveds,
I love you so much.
And may we just soar,
Just as a byproduct of loving our humanity,
You know?
Okay,
Blessings.
